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amoux
United Kingdom
266 Posts |
 Posted - Feb 12 2010 : 06:03:16 AM
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I've just restarted DM, after a two month break - due to my own foolishness in overdoing practices. Anyway, something rather curious is happening - when I do my DM the last couple of days I notice vivid memories arising of a very difficult time in the past, they're 'thoughts' but not thought - more like a movie. At the same time, the Ayam mantra is going on quite happily by itself. I know to gently favour the mantra, but I'm wondering what's up with this? Are these highly-charged memories coming up as a symptom of purification? It seems so odd to me, because it's not my normal experience in DM, which is stacked, 'current day' thoughts like 'I need to remember xyz when I finish this', for example.
I'm wondering whether it's that I have stopped trying to 'force' the mantra and hold back the tide of thoughts - I'm being a lot more gentle about it now - took me till now to realise that I'm not trying to stop thought!
Just curious if anyone has any similar experience with this? It's not like a flashback or traumatic, but rather looking at these memories with fresh eyes - witnessing them, perhaps? So how it feels as if I'm watching two tv channels almost simultaneously - and I'm gently swinging back and forth between the two. As soon as I catch myself 'watching the movie' I notice the mantra is still going on. |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Feb 12 2010 : 09:41:08 AM
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It is purification going on. It is very normal and the less thought you give to the movie arising (love the description  ), the sooner they will go away. It is like a veil is lifted and you get glimpses into things that you did not know were in you.. so it seems a bit unreal... it is a great way of clearing out many many years vasanas (impression) stored in you.
Good things are happening.
Wish you all the best. |
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Clear White Light
USA
229 Posts |
Posted - Feb 12 2010 : 2:28:57 PM
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Hi amoux,
What you describe is perfectly normal. This process of witnessing the contents of our minds lessens our attachment to those contents. As we resolve more and more mental data in this way, we become able to penetrate deeper and deeper into meditation. You should just keep doing what you are doing. |
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amoux
United Kingdom
266 Posts |
Posted - Feb 12 2010 : 4:40:15 PM
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Thank you Shanti, and Clear White Light
I much appreciate your input. |
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Trains of thought and mantra
