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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
 Posted - Nov 26 2008 : 8:41:24 PM
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Namaste Friends,
Today I realized I have had a breakthrough. Not an "acute" realization persay, but more of a gradual change that has happened that I am now just becoming aware of. Many of you probably have some inclination if you have read any amount of my postings, that I enjoy a good arguement, and that dialectic conversation is a love of mine. I have always been the type of person who will play devil's advocate in situations even when I am arguing against what I believe, just to have human connection from conflict resolution. I have just realized that all my life I have been in dire need of human connection and the only way I have been able to satisfy that need is through conflict resolution. Finding conflict, resolving it, and being new best friends with the person I was previously in conflict with. Today, I feel that need for human connection much less strongly. I still love talking with people, and experiencing things through others perspectives via conversation, but I am much more able to just be content being connected to myself. And I am finding as well that I am now shying AWAY from conflict as I find pleasant conversation much more inspiring now. Quite a change for me. Anyways, I just wanted to share this little "milestone" with you all, I hope you enjoyed.
Love,
Carson |
Edited by - CarsonZi on Nov 26 2008 8:43:04 PM |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Nov 27 2008 : 08:19:05 AM
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Oh, I don't know Carson
It's hard to beat a good steam up coupled with a good arguement, after all what's the point in being pleasant all the time, a bit boring, is it not?? |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Nov 27 2008 : 10:30:17 AM
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Hi Louis,
Didn't really mean I'm shying away from ALL conflict, kinda meant that I am no longer going LOOKING for conflict. This was my past MO. Find, or create, conflict if I can't find it, relentlessly try to resolve said conflict, and revel in the human connection involved with finding the common ground. And I don't mind being a little boring now. I've had more action in my short 27 years then most people would see in 5 lifetimes. I'm due for a bit of boring old silence I think.
Love,
Carson |
Edited by - CarsonZi on Nov 27 2008 10:42:17 AM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 27 2008 : 10:44:18 AM
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I have gone through something similar, where I don't seem to need human contact so much. But the emphasis is on need.
I still enjoy it, and don't try to avoid conflict. In fact I seek out human contact and like it. but life is so much easier when we don't feel that need anymore. |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Nov 27 2008 : 11:11:49 AM
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Exactly. No longer NEED to find conflict to feel human connection. Still enjoy human connection, just a more peaceful connection. One not revolving around conflict resolution anymore. I actually get more human connection now then I have ever gotten before (through my new job at the homeless shelter) and I am loving it because I can just enjoy it now instead of controlling it. Much easier, much freer.
Love,
Carson |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Nov 27 2008 : 3:43:09 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by CarsonZi
Hi Louis,
Didn't really mean I'm shying away from ALL conflict, kinda meant that I am no longer going LOOKING for conflict. This was my past MO. Find, or create, conflict if I can't find it, relentlessly try to resolve said conflict, and revel in the human connection involved with finding the common ground. And I don't mind being a little boring now. I've had more action in my short 27 years then most people would see in 5 lifetimes. I'm due for a bit of boring old silence I think.
Love,
Carson
I was just seeing if I could wind you up , my Irish sense of humour |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Nov 27 2008 : 4:17:55 PM
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Good thing you are way over there on the other side of the pond or MY Irish sense of humor might have picked a wee bit o' a brawl wit ya. haha. Thanks for the laugh.
Love,
Carson |
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themysticseeker
USA
342 Posts |
Posted - Nov 29 2008 : 2:20:41 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by CarsonZi
Namaste Friends,
Today I realized I have had a breakthrough. Not an "acute" realization persay, but more of a gradual change that has happened that I am now just becoming aware of. Many of you probably have some inclination if you have read any amount of my postings, that I enjoy a good arguement, and that dialectic conversation is a love of mine. I have always been the type of person who will play devil's advocate in situations even when I am arguing against what I believe, just to have human connection from conflict resolution. I have just realized that all my life I have been in dire need of human connection and the only way I have been able to satisfy that need is through conflict resolution. Finding conflict, resolving it, and being new best friends with the person I was previously in conflict with. Today, I feel that need for human connection much less strongly. I still love talking with people, and experiencing things through others perspectives via conversation, but I am much more able to just be content being connected to myself. And I am finding as well that I am now shying AWAY from conflict as I find pleasant conversation much more inspiring now. Quite a change for me. Anyways, I just wanted to share this little "milestone" with you all, I hope you enjoyed.
Love,
Carson
Hi Carson! I had a similar experience, I would like to share with you. When I got back into meditation some years back, I was getting out of a relationship, and leaving a time of my life when I would always defend others no matter what. When I started meditating, the brothers of a person who I had fought against, were talking to me about their brother. I started defending him in my dream. His brothers said, "you are addicted to care-taking." Then I woke up. That was a big realization for me at the time.
I had become addicted to defending others, and entangling in self-destructive co-dependent relationships. AT that moment I realized that I this urge to entangle out of a misplaced sense of care. This is not the correct care, because it robbed me of peace. Tranquility and peace are precious.
From then on, I was at peace "with myself." I no longer feel the need to entangle in others problems. I'm content to be still in a meditative state. I only come out to spread a little joy.
We are the Cosmos.
HA!
TMS |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Dec 03 2008 : 11:34:29 AM
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Thanks for sharing this story TMS. Tranquility and peace ARE precious, I just hadn't realized this before....I had placed much too much value on activities that created conditions for human connection no matter the cost. It wasn't healthy. Times are a changin' for me though. Peace and tranquility are overflowing these days. Thanks again bro.
Love,
Carson |
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Conflict Resolution
