|
|
 |
|
| Author |
 Topic  |
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 26 2014 : 7:13:18 PM
|
Diarrhea is not a bad result. It's a common symptom of an opening experience in the abdomen (I've mentioned further up this thread that people following my grounding advice may experience diarrhea with fever and even kidney pain). There's a difference between experiencing a healing crisis and experiencing overdoing. It sounds like you haven't yet experienced serious overdoing. You will. And when you do, you will may regret your recklessness.
As to your final question, I don't think this site is the place to find what you're looking for. This isn't a system for the heedless, it's sort of the opposite of that. Bookmark this web site for later, once you find yourself approaching this work with more respect for its seriousness and pitfalls. I don't mean to sound scold-ish or condescending, though. Please just take my suggestion at face value; I don't get the feeling you can be convinced! But I do wish you the very best (and, btw, I love Iranian culture - poetry, music, food, people, sense of humor, etc.) |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Mar 26 2014 7:16:20 PM |
 |
|
|
SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2014 : 04:58:20 AM
|
Dear Roohiiq,
What do you expect will happen after a Kundalini Awakening? Why are you so intent on forcing it, even to the extent of putting your life at risk, even death as you say? What do you think it will bring you?
Sey |
|
|
|
Experientialknowing
USA
263 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2014 : 4:46:11 PM
|
From one stupid deluded idiot to another I thank you for taking the time to write this.
quote:
There is an epidemic of spiritual practitioners who believe they're crackerjack at this spirtual stuff. They know what they're doing. They're on the right track, and, really, it's just a matter of further polishing and refining their very capable spirtuality. They tend to get combative at the suggestion that they're deluded about anything. They need to feel "right". Their expectations, alas, are rock solid, and their assumptions (oh, but very SPIRITUAL assumptions!) are unshakable. It's a huge, huge hindrance. If you're not deeply resigned to your essential idiocy, this sure isn't the path for you!
Every glorious opening I've experienced in yoga brought with it a sharp acknowledge of what an idiot I'd previously been. In the beginning, this fueled my smugness, because I assumed that as my pockets of idiocy were revealed, I was becoming more and more "perfected". But, no, I keep finding more and more ways my perspective is stuck and narrowed and self-serving, and that insights which should stretch to Andromeda hardly make it past my own chin. So...I no longer feel like I'm an inch from some supposed finish line, requiring just a smidge more polish and refinement. I EXPECT my expectations and assumptions to be laughably off. And that expectation is super helpful for yoga.
We're all complete idiots, and yoga is the process that shows us this. So if you're not able to accept your own idiocy - even thirst for revelation of your own idiocy - then this is all really just a jerk-off. So this is long-winded congratulations! Cherish the realization of your own delusion and thickness! There's lots more of that to come! So go easy on expectations and self-direction (let go, let mantra!).
And, most of all, don't fall into the trap of thinking that these "aha!" flashes are forging some new, better, wiser you. There's a lot of mythology about yogic perfection (which has its roots in icky Brahmin classism, but that's another story). Here's an insight that's very seldom stated and almost completely missed by nearly everyone: you are deluded thickness through and through. There's no inner gem to polish. Everything that's specifically you is nothing more than fuzzy-headed clenching. That's what you are. That's who you are. Your body and mind are just a cheap, dull contraction (the good stuff never seems to come from you, right? Epiphany, inspiration, eurekas all seem to come from "out of nowhere"). Remove the fuzzy-headed clenching, and literally nothing remains. So the only thing to do is to let go, falling backwards into the vast What Is. Trust that you'll float. It's ok!
I realize I will offend some readers by my statement that "you are deluded thickness through and through". I get into trouble with that sort of statement here because folks want to feel smart and spiritually capable. Not me. I do yoga 'cuz I know for a fact that I'm a deluded idiot. And I get the feeling that you, like me, are inclined to welcome and cherish revelation of that same essential fact.
Most people do yoga to feel smart. A few do it to feel stupid. Welcome to the stupid pool!
|
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Apr 01 2014 : 12:37:54 PM
|
You're welcome!
I had a dream once where I came across a group of people who described themselves as "waker-uppers". They insisted they knew a lot about waking up (hey, they had lots of experience....they'd been working at it for years!). They wore special uniforms, they had adopted sanskrit names, and they spoke of miracles and powers and purification. All were certain they were really close to waking up. |
|
|
|
Kduzza
United Kingdom
6 Posts |
Posted - Apr 18 2014 : 3:27:19 PM
|
quote:
Originally posted by Jim and His Karma
quote:
Originally posted by Kduzza
I understand what you're saying in terms of letting things be, however it's much easier said than done. I'm 17 so I have some pretty crucial exams coming up, and the blockage is preventing me from being able to retain any information, as well as connecting with the people I love.
Didn't realize you were so young. FWIW, you express yourself beautifully for a 17 year old. You're doing great!
Listen, it's not that I don't (clearly) remember the sensation of being adrift without an instruction manual (or anyone who could "fix" me), and of clutching at whatever straws I could manage to grab at. I'm not scoffing at your situation. I'm just trying to direct your attention somewhere helpful - which is anywhere but where it currently is.
Yoga in general, and kundalini awakening in particular, draw us inward...sometimes to an excess. Grounding is the solution. Outwardness. Worldliness. Engagement. All different words for the same thing. But as I try to direct your attention there, I can feel resistance. You want to go the OTHER way. It's a pull. And my point is that this very inclination, this very pull, IS the problem. IS the block.
You are infinite space. Any sensation of limits, borders, edges, or blocks, is nothing but a perceptual habit reinforced over time. There's nothing actually there, aside from a tendency to put attention there. The block is you (i.e. your resistance), not something afflicting you. The best way to relax that resistance is via meditation (with good self-pacing) while grounding (e.g. my suggestions in the first post in this thread). The more you conceive of a block, the more blocked you become. That's how it started in the first place. The perspective comes first (once again, cause/effect is not what you think!).
quote:
I will come out of this with more gratitude for every aspect of life.
This is a helpful tip: don't look for change. You aren't self-perfecting. That's a myth. It doesn't happen (which is one reason all these supposedly perfect gurus invariably turn out to be so shmucky). You'll continue to be flawed and ungrateful (unless you learn to pose/pretend real well....in which case you may eventually fool even yourself). Only self-deluded yogis transform into god-like beings.
Everything can stay exactly as-is. You know that military phrase, "As you were"? That's as spiritual a phrase as they come. I was doing what you were doing at your age (I'm nearly triple it now). And if I could send myself a message back in time, that's what it'd say.
Have you noticed that after all this yoga, you still get mad/petty/greedy/other bad things, just like you always did....but (big "but"!) you view yourself at those moments from a slightly more distant and dispassionate viewpoint? Like you're watching yourself get upset from a viewpoint of total calm? And have you noticed that, as you practice yoga, you find yourself switching to this viewpoint sooner and sooner (and, just as importantly, that it's not something you control or will....it just happens)?
That's the whole ball game right there. You still act shmucky and human (because that's what you are!), but the deepest part of you, which has always remained sublimely indifferent (not cold-hearted, just sort of...mature) , becomes more and more your viewpoint.
I'm guessing you've noticed all this. So read the tea leaves: this is what yoga's working toward. Not changing/improving you or your behavior, just easing you out of your mistaken perception that you're That Guy (you can't be that which you can observe). His shmuckiness and ingratitude and all the rest can stay. "As you were!"
Same for this block issue. Find that same viewpoint of spacious dispassion, and the same indifferent acceptance of EVERYTHING, just as-is. The block issue can continue if it wants to! But (to use the hideously misused vedanta question), who's blocked?
quote:
Today I experienced an opening after the throat dilation. It was like a warm lovey feeling that lasted for a whilw, and the head pressure dissipated. This for me is promising as I now have a better understanding and know this is something that can be worked with.
Great! But don't overdo it!! It's very powerful. Deceptively so, like lots of tiny yoga moves. Openings feel great, but you've already learned why discipline and restraint and ease are critical. Too much of a good thing, etc....
Hi Jim. your last post to me was very insightful and left me with a lot to think about (or not think about as the case may be)..
Around a week ago I experienced a substantial opening in the throat, whereas before I had quite intense head and face pressure, it is now very minimal.
It was pretty unexpected and sudden, I didn't anticipate an opening and think it may have been a little too sudden. A reoccurring thought about a specific anxiety/trauma of the past entered my mind, this had been bothering me for quite some time.. As this thought entered my mind an emotion was triggered, but I didn't identify with the feeling and get lost within it, i created an inner space between it and a acceptance, as if to say ' I do not wish to change how this feels and accept it regardless'. What proceeded felt like a loosening of a coil in my throat, or a crumbling which ran down in to my abdomen.. whereas before I had felt an almost constant lump in my throat, is now much clearer. I had a mild sore throat the following few days and felt a bit groggy.
I now have a mild pain in my tail bone and am aware that the energy has ramped up a little to fill the space, so I'm going to focus much more on grounding for the next few months until I'm feeling a little less raw. Tomorrow I have an appointment with a Chinese herbalist, but when they give me the herbs I will Hang on to them until I am feeling more grounded then I'll give them a try.
The time when I find the energetic symptoms most apparent is when I'm trying to get to sleep, it really ramps up, possibly due to my attention, when I have my eyes closed trying to sleep it is difficult to ignore. I'm torn between giving up on getting my mind off of it and just letting whatever happens take it's course, and hoping it is a positive thing, or continue to try and get my mind of it, by constantly thinking of other things and wriggling around in bed until I fall asleep (which takes some time). How did you deal with it when you were trying to get to sleep? Or did it not effect your sleep as much?
Since I stopped my daily 20 minute meditation on the in and out flow of breath 6 months ago(due to the head pressure), I've lost a lot of the awareness and non reactiveness I once had before the symptoms arose, which is frustrating because I find it more difficult to deal with some of the daily challenges.. I'm thinking of continuing meditation once I feel more at ease with the symptoms, but am unsure of the type of meditation that might be suitable, and if meditation at all is recommend after not doing it for such a long time?
I want to again assure you that the information in this post has been of great help! It's aided me through some difficult experiences, and progress has definitely been made with throat dilating, walking and the other general overload tips you provide in the post :) |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Apr 19 2014 : 4:48:02 PM
|
quote:
it may have been a little too sudden
You need to get past the notion that there's an optimal way for everything to happen. You are the space in which everything plays out. You are not the guy doing the yoga, the guy repeating terribly spiritual and mature affirmations, or the guy with blocks and physical symptoms.
quote:
As this thought entered my mind an emotion was triggered, but I didn't identify with the feeling and get lost within it, i created an inner space between it and a acceptance, as if to say ' I do not wish to change how this feels and accept it regardless'.
That's an improvement, sorta, I guess, but it's just a more layered means of trying to assert control. The guy making these sorts of policy statements and trying to control these situations - even control his own transcendence via yoga - is that same guy who does shmucky things and is ungrateful who we spoke about before.
It's subterfuge to command a lack of control (and, yes, I do realize I'm the one suggesting precisely that, but, hey, such is the paradox of discussing any of this stuff). The move is to stop maneuvering and start letting. I wrote this once:
quote:
Our ego is like a toddler steering his toy steering wheel with great attention in the passenger seat as daddy drives. We feel disoriented, angry, and disappointed that the car keeps turning when we don't, and that our turns often have no effect. It's a nauseating disconnection. But there are enough random coincidences (I steer my toy wheel and the car really does go that way) to keep us hooked to the delusion for our entire bloody lives.
Let go of the chintzy little plastic toy steering wheel, already!
Back to your posting...
quote:
What proceeded felt like a loosening of a coil in my throat, or a crumbling which ran down in to my abdomen.. whereas before I had felt an almost constant lump in my throat, is now much clearer.
Great, but as I read that, my next thought is you'd get a helluva healing crisis after such an opening.
quote:
I had a mild sore throat the following few days and felt a bit groggy.
And, yup, there you go. Get used to it. Cleaning is dirty work. This dispels yet another myth, that this is all about personifying purity and snowy whiteness. If you ever somehow managed to transcend the dirt, nothing would remain but emptiness, with no one left to feel all pure and snowy (because everything you think of as "you" is that very same dirt - I.e. that which causes the sensation of separateness). If you start feeling pure and snowy, that's just dirt self-deluding. It means things got stuck again.
[I'm using "dirt" as a metaphor, of course. Really, it's more akin to contraction, or clenching. But while I don't claim to understand the physical processes, the observation that "cleaning is dirty work" and that you, yourself (at least the separate individual with an unfolding life story with which you identify) are that self-same dirt, holds up.]
Meanwhile, get used to this lurching cycle of openings and grogginess. And don't try to manage them. Your controls are limited and simple: self-pacing your practices, and engaging with the world (aka "grounding").
quote:
Tomorrow I have an appointment with a Chinese herbalist, but when they give me the herbs I will Hang on to them until I am feeling more grounded then I'll give them a try.
I'm confused. You're going to an herbalist to help your grounding problem, but you're going to wait to take them until the problem gets better? |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Apr 21 2014 4:50:17 PM |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 04 2014 : 06:49:28 AM
|
@ Jim and His Karma,
I'd really like to know if you ever identified the trad. chinese med. herbs that you took to improve your front channel/grounding. For me it's annoying you never said because I have no TCM herbalists nearby and to even reliably test ungrounded I'd have to re-start meditating and endure terrible ongoing pains for days or weeks in preparation. Due to the pains, I stopped meditating when kundalini erupted many years ago and have made small progress since. I desperately want to meditate and do AYP methods, but the pains always come back quickly and continue day/night. (Worst of all intense energy bouncing around and burning up my jaw and mouth, moving teeth and burning gums, etc.) So I'd really appreciate these details if you know them or know who does. Thanks. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 04 2014 : 3:23:59 PM
|
I understand your frustration, but it's personal to the individual, and determined by traditional pulse diagnosis. It's just not a "one size fits all" thing (in fact, one size doesn't even fit one; my herb blend is adjusted monthly according to my pulse signs). I'd strongly advise you not to self-prescribe, or to resort to herbal suggestions in books, internet, etc. And Chinese is the way...for a yogi I'm pretty surprisingly against Ayurvedic herbs (I've had bad experiences...I believe Yogani has as well). OTOH, Ayurvedic diet guidelines are terrific (have you tried to reduce pitta that way?).
I offer loads and loads of suggestions in this thread (particularly the first posting). Herbs are only one. Have you tried the others? |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Jun 04 2014 3:26:14 PM |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 05 2014 : 1:09:11 PM
|
| Oh well, I guess I'll have to find my way to a TCM herbalist anyway. As for your other suggestions, I'm very excited about Chi Nei Tsang as I have at least 2 practitioners not far away. For years I've done daily long outdoor walks and pitta reducing, but I can't figure the front throat dilation yet. All I notice is that the muscles there and in my lower jaw start quivering and spasming, which is weird! But as with meditation, my head keeps starting to roll back and my mouth wants to open, which means crown opening, my flow going wild and kriya puppetry. So the more physical treatments may be my only options. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 05 2014 : 3:28:02 PM
|
Examine what your body does to clear ear canals (eg on planes). It's the same thing. There's no forcing, no muscle action. It's just an easy dilation. Many people find this challenging, and force. Force in yoga is always always always self-defeating. It's one of the very few blanket statements you can make. So if it's not coming naturally for you, try something else!
I didn't intend for everyone to try all zillion suggestions. Just to find one or two that seem right. And not get uptight and clingy/clenchy/obsessive/anguished about them. Such attitude IS the block! |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 05 2014 : 6:45:00 PM
|
| Well I at least am not anguished! This thread is great and has inspired me to get proactive again. I've tried too little for too long, feeling little hope for serious progress within a decade and sometimes feeling cursed. I have to try things to know if they seem right, since as usual my intuition is fuzzy from head-pressure, and that's the only other way to know. I'll even drive up and down a hill a few times to pay closer attention to ear dilation, as flat lands and few planes necessitate that, lol. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2014 : 12:16:34 AM
|
Cool! Check off "anguish" then! :)
I don't think you ought to go to those lengths to re-explore your ear clearing dilation move. If you aren't someone with body awareness in those particular places, then that suggestion isn't speaking to you, and I'd skip it. You will just create more problems if you keep straining at the throat. I'd give it a rest. The straining IS the block (as I've repeated a number of times in this thread).
There are approximately one zillion people in this thread completely geared up about doing "proactive" things to "make progress" because they feel "cursed" yet delighted to have loads of moves to forcefully overdo and obsess over in an attempt to improve a situation that's caused by their being completely geared up about doing "proactive" things to "make progress" because they feel "cursed" yet delighted to have loads of moves to forcefully overdo and obsess over.
No one seems able to spot that loop, no matter how bluntly I point to it. The hot-headedness of bhakti is not always a good thing, and I speak from experience (so I sympathize; I really do!)
Definitely not speaking specifically to you here, tunakelid, but whenever I hear people insisting the world will be a peaceful wonderful place once everyone does sadhana, I chortle. The reason there's only a thin drizzle of bhakti (even if there's more now than before) is that the world couldn't possibly survive much more of it. |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Jun 06 2014 01:13:16 AM |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2014 : 03:41:16 AM
|
LOL!  
PLEASE tell which of your techniques will make me a comedian too! Surely there's dozens of them and I NEED TO AND MUST DRILL those techs like 24/7! GOTTA GIMME ALL THE TECH MAN! I HAVE TO MAKE PROGRESS LIKE, YESTERDAY! But seriously, it's something like a zen koan isn't it: "How does one change without doing any changing?" A riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. We can see the infinite loop, but still want to say: so what do we "do" about it?
Also, I meant to say I am (not anguished, etc!), or so I think.  And if I seem a bit wacky here, it's all my energy doing it I promise! LOL, but likely is my damn heart again, making progress. Gotta do something about that... |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2014 : 09:48:44 AM
|
Again, I sympathize. You try the kundalini experiment, stuff happens, genies don't go back in bottles, it's all a bit more than you bargained for, and nobody can "fix" you (though the internet's full of opinions), and you can't discuss it with family/friends without sounding like a nut. The kundalini makes everything feel super "significant", which throws off your reasoning, and you find yourself applying super ardent fervidness to your efforts to be less super ardent and fervid. You try to simply surrender to issues, but surrender's what got you into this in the first place, so it's like a Chinese finger trap that tightens as you try to escape. I get it, I do!
Comedy isn't a bad course to take. It strips away some of that "grave significance of it all" feeling, and it's grounding. Laughing at yourself takes you at least partly there. And FWIW, you don't seem particularly whacky. You're one of the more grounded ones. I was whackier when I was in the thick of it. And I still need to step gingerly....still not back to 20 min meditation sessions (I'm at 10).
Engage. Laugh. Do stuff in the world. Go outward, don't stay obsessing inward. And do nano-practices, not zero practices. And Tai Chi, or whichever of my suggestions feel natural to you.
It dismays me when cancer survivors deem themselves Cancer Survivors. There's more to life than Having Been Sick Once. Same with Kundalini. Don't turn into a Kundalini Person. Get back; get back to where you once belonged. Seize the carpe diem. Work, exercise, joke, hang out, walk. And avoid pitta producing foods (NO spice, NO alcohol)! Pretend to be normal until it "keeps". That's the escape from the loop. |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Jun 06 2014 09:50:45 AM |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 09 2014 : 9:00:27 PM
|
| Well my energy awoke spontaneously and I was actually hoping to avoid it, as I'd already read about kundalini casualties. I'd guess that's uncommon but who knows. But I think avoiding nano-practices has been a big mistake. I tend to be either intense on something or I dump it. Often useful, but it's really cost me with this. So even if I find 5 mins of spinal breathing and/or meditating are all I can handle, that's just what I better do. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 10 2014 : 10:52:49 AM
|
Thinking in terms of "kundalini casualty" is about as useful as talking about "puberty casualty" just because some 13 year olds go sex crazy for a while. The problem's not in the biological progression, which is natural and inevitable. It's in one's underlying issues which may become more apparent in times of transition. And those problems had to be dealt with, eventually, anyway.
The analogy goes pretty far. Puberty doesn't make you a sex crazy, it just gives you the wherewithal to channel those drives. And kundalini doesn't make you an over-ardent maniac, it just gives you wherewithal to be that. Puberty gives you the fuel of semen and orgasm. Kundalini gives you the fuel of fervidness. The two transitions don't make people crazy. They simply offer people more power to over-indulge their pre-existing craziness.
I think back to my freshman year at college. Some kids went crazy drinking cuz they could. Others didn't. It wasn't the alcohol that did it (except for the small percentage who were actual alcoholics, a very different thing). They weren't "alcohol calamities".
I'm not trying to make this a moralist condemnation. My point is that right there in your own words you describe an intemperate mindset. It's the same thing I've been pointing to again and again. You seem pretty cheerful about it (just as sex crazy 13 year olds are quite happy with their orgasms and college freshman are quite happy about their vodka). You're also ruing the downsides, as the 13 year olds and freshman might. But just like them, you're blaming the wrong part of the equation. It's not the genitals, the booze, or the kundalini. |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 11 2014 : 1:40:49 PM
|
Well this discussion seems to be getting too philosophical for me as I'm missing your point(s), or their importance. "Kundalini casualty" is a term I've read many times and so I used it, but referring to others who have experienced far worse still. I think I best focus on solutions requiring less insight.
Speaking of which, in 2007 you said: "Even better is a qidong I've been practicing. But I'm not ready to share it yet." (Better than the slight-crouch exercise, where you visualise a ball between hands, you meant). And in another post you seem to call it a form of deep earth kidney pulsing. So is there a reason you didn't mention it in your first post in this thread? And did you learn it from Michael Winn's 2 hr Sexual Vitality Qigong DVD? Thanks. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 11 2014 : 3:38:24 PM
|
Sorry, Tunakelid, I've been trying to express the same observation from several different directions in the past few postings, hoping one might jar something. A couple did seem to get somewhere (e.g. I'm making the exact same point I made in the amusing post you seemed to enjoy), but I should have quit while ahead!
The qidong was this one, which is indeed a Michael Winn thing. It didn't do much for me, but I may have done it wrong, or quit too soon.
The ball crouch is, I think, ace.
|
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Jun 11 2014 4:36:13 PM |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2014 : 03:29:19 AM
|
| Well unfortunately Jim, you're just confusing me now more than ever. Gurdjieff doesn't say what to do about the "other lower centers co-opting the energy (of) the sex center". So to me it seems just another general problem without an obvious or simple solution. I can collect all the diagnoses in the world, but without treatments what good are they. Anyway, I'm trying something that seems to show some potential, and I ordered Winn's Qigong (Chi Kung) Fundamentals 3 & 4, which is about rooting/grounding. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2014 : 9:52:10 PM
|
| In this thread, I've offered of dozens of things to do. Plus the suggestion that you simply calm down and stop focusing on it. Whichever you choose, good luck in your quest! |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Jun 19 2014 12:49:52 AM |
|
|
|
tunakelid
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2014 : 06:56:43 AM
|
| Well when I said "This thread is great and has inspired me", I mainly meant your posts. And you have great ones elsewhere. I'm pursuing a few of your ideas and stumbled on another that already shows promise so I'm cool for now. |
|
|
|
pkj
USA
158 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2014 : 3:43:55 PM
|
Jim
Totally agree with the statement and can very well relate to that.
"You try the kundalini experiment, stuff happens, genies don't go back in bottles, it's all a bit more than you bargained for, and nobody can "fix" you (though the internet's full of opinions), and you can't discuss it with family/friends without sounding like a nut. The kundalini makes everything feel super "significant", which throws off your reasoning, and you find yourself applying super ardent fervidness to your efforts to be less super ardent and fervid. You try to simply surrender to issues, but surrender's what got you into this in the first place, so it's like a Chinese finger trap that tightens as you try to escape. I get it, I do!
Comedy isn't a bad course to take. It strips away some of that "grave significance of it all" feeling, and it's grounding. Laughing at yourself takes you at least partly there. And FWIW, you don't seem particularly whacky. You're one of the more grounded ones. I was whackier when I was in the thick of it. And I still need to step gingerly....still not back to 20 min meditation sessions (I'm at 10)."
Thanks for the post.
PKJ |
|
|
|
lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Jul 22 2014 : 11:51:36 AM
|
Hi Jim,
There's been a repeated shift in the attention field. It widens, feels lighter, everything's not so heavy. It happens most often while driving, occasionally at night, and sometimes during meditation. Is this what you have been pointing towards in the latter posts in this thread?
I keep seeing a choice. I can find this space and let things arise and fall, but I'm pretty sensitive and don't want to fry myself. |
|
|
|
Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Jul 23 2014 : 11:05:22 AM
|
lalow, That sounds like things are going well. I'd suggest you resist trying to "place" your experiences within a conceptual model. That compulsion to model and conceptualize is what lead to the heaviness in the first place. You don't need to "own" these experiences, or manage them.
Threads like this - and forums like this - may be helpful when you're having a problem of some sort. But reading around here to try to "check yourself" when things are plowing along is, IMO, a pretty serious error. My suggestion is that you do the practices casually, like brushing your teeth, and otherwise just immerse in day-to-day life and resist the compulsion to examine yourself in the long view, tell yourself stories about what's happening, and otherwise make it a self-conscious experience (the way it might be if you're, say, learning French or learning to juggle, where you constantly need to gauge and check. This isn't like learning!).
Unless there are overdoing symptoms - that should be managed and checked! |
Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Jul 23 2014 11:08:50 AM |
|
|
|
Topic |
|
|
|
| AYP Public Forum |
© Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) |
|
|
|
|
Kundalini Overload: Grounding/Front Channel Block
