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lapindigo
USA
6 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 21 2016 : 2:49:54 PM
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| Hi, I'm new to the forum. I just want to reach out and maybe get involved in this community because I think it is needed. I have been practicing AYP for about 2 years now. At one point, I had gradually built up to a daily routine of amaroli, 20-40 minutes of asana, followed by SBP, DM, and a fair portion of the mudras, bandhas, etc. to total about an hour of sitting practices including the meditation. I had some steady kundalini circulating, with no ill effects. There was even 2 whole days of pure inner silence (which went away when I tried to describe it to my wife.) Things got out of balance, and the practices became inconsistent. I tried to build back up. One day in December, I sent one single breath to the crown. I don't know why. I don't know if that caused or contributed to what happened shortly thereafter. Another thing is, a few years ago, I ended up reading about some certain types of dark/"evil" entities. It is not a well-known phenomena, and I think that had I not read about them, they would not have interacted with me, so I don't think I really want to go into too much detail about the nature of the beings, but one day in December, years after reading about them, I started thinking about them. I don't know why, but the descriptions I had read just popped into my head, and I thought, 'I wonder if that is real?' As I was thinking about it, I got the creepiest feeling. Well, a few days after that they showed up. It was a very paranormal experience, but very, very real. After that encounter, I became afraid. Before that, I had never really had any fear, but afterwards, I was very fearful. It also made everything too real. Before, I had been content to chalk up things like demons as metaphorical. I have been spiritual for years, but it was different after having that interaction, and the part of me that had been able to remain skeptical about non-material phenomena had to concede that some such things are very real. Well, before that experience, I thought I was transcending notions of light vs. dark or good vs. evil, but after that, I felt very caught up in it. I became a little paranoid about innumerable entities swirling around me, angels and demons battling and such. I felt real but intangible effects of my thoughts and emotions. Also, my crown was going crazy and would not stop tingling. For the first 2 or 3 days after the experience, I wore a beanie at all times, to literally and metaphorically try and put a lid on it. Obviously, I was not grounded. I knew it, and I tried grounding my feet, eating a heavier diet like Yogani talks about, grounding gem stones, exercise. I stopped the AYP practices completely. I thought, not for the first time, about Yogani's wisdom. In this case, how he speaks of the best path to enlightenment being rather non-eventful. Before that experience, I wanted eventful, unusual experiences, but afterwards I just wanted 'normal.' This was all a little much for me throughout the rest of the winter, and it didn't help that it was dark so much of the time. I have come to realize that the whole 'battle' is in the mind, and the fear that negative or dark energy attempts to inspire is the basis of its power. So, if we have no fear, the darkness has no power. I also realized the power of thoughts, intentions, and beliefs. I feel more able now to embrace the spiritual, immaterial aspects of life and consciousness because I have had a first-hand, personal experience which makes the existence of the spiritual realm undeniable. I guess I am at a point now where I feel I am finally integrating my experience. I finally started meditating again. Actually, of all things, I never stopped the amaroli. But now I am just doing amaroli, meditating and also doing the dynamic jalandhara (it's great for my throat chakra, and the consequent health issues [a subject for another thread]). I kind of wanted to join up here, relate my experiences, and ask for help sooner; I'm not sure why I didn't. So, what do you think? |
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BlueRaincoat
United Kingdom
1734 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2016 : 3:37:51 PM
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Hello lapindigo, welcome to the forum
Glad you decided to say 'hello'.
It sounds like the energy side of things got ahead of the inner silence (you know Yogani talks about two sides that develop and eventually merge). The thing to do with the thoughts and emotions you are describing is to release them into silence.
Had you checked in a little earlier, we might have told you to drop amaroli (that practice nudges the energy) and stick to some gentle form of meditation (to help increase the silence). Anyway, it sounds like your have found balance again. When in doubt, always prioritise meditation over energy practices.
Hope all goes smoothly for you from now on.  |
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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2016 : 4:25:21 PM
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Hi lapindigo,
Welcome to the forums! Good advice from Blue already. This lesson may help.
http://www.aypsite.org/421.html
Sunyata |
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Dogboy
USA
2294 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2016 : 4:52:03 PM
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Hello lapindigo, welcome!
While I don't have experience with dark entities, I do think you are spot on with your conclusion that they are products of your mind, that given fertile ground and acknowledgment they may thrive much in the same way a nightmare plays out. I am happy for you to have reached dawn after such a dark night.
I too have learned there is tremendous power in belief and intention, the "believer believes" phenomenon. An intention directed by will and a positive outlook is an important tool in a spiritual toolbox. Blue Raincoat makes a good observation about inner silence; AYP practice is designed around cultivating silence before energy for that reason. You have gained as much as you've lost from this last winter; now that you've stabilized, keep it positive, keep it light.  |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 02:00:51 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Dogboy
While I don't have experience with dark entities, I do think you are spot on with your conclusion that they are products of your mind...
They are products of your mind in the way everything else is a product of your mind - including the belief that ALL this is real. I have a different theory. I believe that they exist on a lower vibratory level of the Consciousness continuum and, as DM raises your vibration, they will pass out of your range of the Consciousness continuum and at some point Higher Beings will start interacting with you. We are happy to believe in Higher Beings but shy away from believing in Lower Beings.
@ lapindigo - I would suggest you move forward carefully. Self-pace, self-pace, self-pace. I would drop the dynamic jalandhara and any other energy stimulating practice except for SBP.
Sey
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 03:57:14 AM
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quote:
I kind of wanted to join up here, relate my experiences, and ask for help sooner; I'm not sure why I didn't. So, what do you think?
Welcome to these AYP forums lapindigo
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lapindigo
USA
6 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 7:49:51 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by BlueRaincoat
When in doubt, always prioritise meditation over energy practices.
Hope all goes smoothly for you from now on.
Noted; and good call! Thank you! |
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lapindigo
USA
6 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 7:50:54 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by sunyata
Hi lapindigo,
Welcome to the forums! Good advice from Blue already. This lesson may help.
http://www.aypsite.org/421.html
Sunyata
Hi Sunyata, and thank you for the welcome. I did re-read the lesson, and found it helpful. Thanks! |
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lapindigo
USA
6 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 8:35:42 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Dogboy
Hello lapindigo, welcome!
While I don't have experience with dark entities, I do think you are spot on with your conclusion that they are products of your mind, that given fertile ground and acknowledgment they may thrive much in the same way a nightmare plays out. I am happy for you to have reached dawn after such a dark night.
I too have learned there is tremendous power in belief and intention, the "believer believes" phenomenon. An intention directed by will and a positive outlook is an important tool in a spiritual toolbox. Blue Raincoat makes a good observation about inner silence; AYP practice is designed around cultivating silence before energy for that reason. You have gained as much as you've lost from this last winter; now that you've stabilized, keep it positive, keep it light.
Thanks for the welcome and the well-wishes!
The 'intention directed by will' brings up another thought I was having, about samyama. My sense is that it would be useful to bring it back in (I was doing it for a while in the past, then sporadically...) It seems it is more a silence type of practice than energetic, and I feel (especially now that I have seen the power of my thoughts and intentions) it could help with everything. |
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lapindigo
USA
6 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 8:44:30 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by SeySorciere
I would suggest you move forward carefully. Self-pace, self-pace, self-pace. I would drop the dynamic jalandhara and any other energy stimulating practice except for SBP.
Sey
Thanks for that perspective, Sey. Although, it has been 4 months now. I feel like things have stabilized so that I can get back into the practices, and I feel like I need to. I also have a real sense that I need to clear and open my throat chakra. Maybe that's why it took 4 months for me to say anything here, even though I kept thinking I wanted to. |
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lapindigo
USA
6 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 8:47:21 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Charliedog
Welcome to these AYP forums lapindigo
Thanks so much!! |
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Dogboy
USA
2294 Posts |
Posted - Apr 22 2016 : 9:53:12 PM
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By all mean, lapindigo, samyama is perfect for your next practice. It is based in inner silence and if that is strong in you, samyama is the other part of the equation: DM cultivates inward, samyama outward, surrendering the fruits of practice to the Divine, to immediate family, friends, acquaintances, strangers...As I pass through the sutras, I send them from my solar center. It registers physically, as if my center is being strummed. I can't recommend it enough 
http://www.aypsite.org/150.html
http://www.aypsite.org/368.html
Edit: add links
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Edited by - Dogboy on Apr 22 2016 9:55:58 PM |
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Some Experiences
