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Pheel
China
318 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 27 2013 : 10:33:04 PM
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This tendency to fly into the future has been with me for God-knows-how-long.
For example, before a job interview, the mind automatically imagine all sorts of situations and scenarios, and even weaving them into a complicated story line: first they are not impressed by my appearance, then they are surprised by my knowing certain things they never guess I'd know, then we have a great chat....yet, they give me a salary that is almost "disrespectful" to me, and I got angry etc. etc.
The ego used to like it by tagging it as "imaginative", "literary talent". Now I can see it as mere stories, stories that separate me from now, from Life. But, I also found that denying it as false does not help--they soon come back with more variations and tricks....
So, I feel the right thing is to accept it and observe it and see the things that the mind use it to cover up, things that I was unwilling to face before, even subconsciously. I know this tendency is part of my karmic pattern. But what are the things that I habitually avoid/escape from/cover up by flying into the future? I feel I am still on a very superficial level in seeing through this.....Yet this time I want to be COMPLETELY honest with myself.
May Life/Silence show me.....
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Pheel
China
318 Posts |
Posted - Jul 27 2013 : 10:54:31 PM
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After crying and tearing for ten minutes, I'd like to share the answer I was given:
There is NO need to find any reasons for this future-flight of the mind. To give it any concrete reason is to distort it, and the searching for the reason is but another trap of the mind.
What I did, by Grace I did, is just to see that this tendency has been choking my life for so long, acknowledge it, and allow my self to cry it out, allow myself to cry and cry and cry, till heart's content, for I have been allowing myself to cry for soooo long......
Yea, just see it, and Cry It Out. |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Jul 28 2013 : 08:03:22 AM
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Very nice! 
(((((Hug))))) |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Jul 28 2013 : 8:12:53 PM
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This is an uplifting story of purification, Pheel. Thank you for sharing. |
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Pheel
China
318 Posts |
Posted - Sep 14 2013 : 09:51:08 AM
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| Thank you Shanti and Bodhi Tree for sharing this moment with me! All these flights spring from the desire to control, the mind wanting the world to be exactly the way it wants. The coloring of the world comes from it, and there's tremendous amount of mental violence in it toward one self and others.... |
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Future--my mind's favorite flight destination
