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Nathan
47 Posts |
 Posted - Jan 27 2013 : 1:18:33 PM
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Hello,
When I've practiced DM in the past, it leads to enjoyment of inner silence, but also increased sensitivity, such as to noise, and emotional sensitivity also. I would like to get to a place of increasing equanimity, where things don't bother me, and I can enjoy the inner silence more. Could some members share when equanimity started happening for them?
By the way, I mean a naturally arising equanimity that comes as a result of meditation, not really dispassion as a mental exercise.
Thanks. |
Edited by - Nathan on Jan 27 2013 1:21:56 PM |
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karl
United Kingdom
1812 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2013 : 04:15:09 AM
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Look to the place from which all that bothering arises. Wander in those places and you will see they are nothing more than ghostly images that burn off like mist in the fire of the sun.
Accepting what you fear most by driving into those places that hide in the dark recesses of your mind constantly. It takes time to prepare for those journeys so take it easy as you meditate, there is no rush.
Equality is the acceptance of all your fears, pains, hates, troubles and anger. You cannot learn to tackle them in one go because they will overwhelm you. You can be brave but if you are not residing in stillness you will see them as enemies and then you will fight against them and you will lose the battle.
So, gentle, a little at a time, with love, patience and understanding they are tackled. Cultivate true stillness first, reside in that. |
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Nathan
47 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2013 : 6:42:22 PM
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| Thanks for your response Karl. Those are some good things to remember and put into practice. I think I know what you mean by wandering in the places that bother. Separating the feelings from the sense of self, and seeing what they are. I'll try to continue cultivating silence, and hopefully the negative thoughts and emotions will lose their power. In the AYP lesson on "Enlightenment Milestones," Yogani uses the words "Inner stability," and I'm guessing this is the same or similar to equanimity. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2013 : 11:48:41 PM
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Dear Nathan,
I am now almost 7 years of practice and it is only now that I know the TRUE meaning of equanimity...and that is during my sittings where I abide in a clear space of nothingness and no grasping /no rejecting. I am aware of this Nothingness (the Witness) all the time now but I am not 'IT'. In daily life, I manage to let go of most ups and downs,except for a few big issues, that I yet have to deal with but I am one who goes with the natural flow of things and all in good time. So I am centred but not really in equanimity. Each of us is different and will experience things in different time frames. But I hope my sharing helps answer your question.
Sey |
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karl
United Kingdom
1812 Posts |
Posted - Jan 29 2013 : 05:07:59 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Nathan
Thanks for your response Karl. Those are some good things to remember and put into practice. I think I know what you mean by wandering in the places that bother. Separating the feelings from the sense of self, and seeing what they are. I'll try to continue cultivating silence, and hopefully the negative thoughts and emotions will lose their power. In the AYP lesson on "Enlightenment Milestones," Yogani uses the words "Inner stability," and I'm guessing this is the same or similar to equanimity.
Equanimity isn't a static position. It isnt just attained and that's the end. Instead you are continually challenged. Initially the rise of the witness gives perspective and space that allows a degree of separation from an invent or thought.
Gradually there is more and more inner stability caused by greater stillness. This does not mean isolation from life, it means an even greater connection with life. This is difficult to completely understand. That you go in deeper and you accept things far more than before.
It is the rejection that causes the problem. Trying to find equanimity is essentially about rejecting those things you dislike. Its a balance of neither rejecting or attaching to thoughts and learning to crawl before you can walk. So that it isn't this instantaneous transition, or miraculous numbing, its opening the heart far wider and accepting this greater exposure like a flower opening.
The base of internal stability allows this to happen, but don't think for one moment there is isolation, the world actually rushes in faster and harder, its just that it is no longer refused or rejected but welcomed with an open heart. There are always new things that are more challenging, but once there is balance the adaption process is far quicker, almost instantaneous.
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cosmic
USA
821 Posts |
Posted - Jan 29 2013 : 1:40:35 PM
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Hello Nathan,
The heightened sensitivity to noise/emotion/etc. you describe sounds like a phase. I will often experience this after a retreat, catharsis, or big opening. Fortunately it passes and is nothing to worry about. It's a normal part of the opening process. It might help you to lay low and avoid unnecessary stimulation until it passes.
For me, equanimity is a gradual development that still continues to grow. It can take time to recognize because of the gradualness and because the situations that once disturbed you might not happen very often.
But rest assured that the AYP practices will increase your equanimity over time. Don't be disheartened by occasional phases of sensitivity or emotional turbulence. Those will happen at times and are not a sign of regression.
Namaste
cosmic |
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Nathan
47 Posts |
Posted - Jan 29 2013 : 7:25:48 PM
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Sey: Thanks for sharing your experience. I found it inspiring.
Karl: I see what you mean about rejection being a problem, and neither rejecting or attaching to thoughts.
Reminds me of the words of Sosan: "If you wish to see the truth then hold no opinions for or against anything. To set up what you like against what you dislike is the disease of the mind." "The great way is not difficult for those who have no preferences." Of course we all know that we aren't going to instantly go beyond likes and dislikes just because we want to. As you have hinted at, things happen gradually (for most).
Cosmic: It's encouraging to be reminded that my heightened sensitivity is most likely a phase. It can be
disheartening when meditation leads to decreased equanimity, but I think you're right about it being related to catharsis or opening. |
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karl
United Kingdom
1812 Posts |
Posted - Jan 30 2013 : 03:17:42 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Nathan
Sey: Thanks for sharing your experience. I found it inspiring.
Karl: I see what you mean about rejection being a problem, and neither rejecting or attaching to thoughts.
Reminds me of the words of Sosan: "If you wish to see the truth then hold no opinions for or against anything. To set up what you like against what you dislike is the disease of the mind." "The great way is not difficult for those who have no preferences." Of course we all know that we aren't going to instantly go beyond likes and dislikes just because we want to. As you have hinted at, things happen gradually (for most).
Cosmic: It's encouraging to be reminded that my heightened sensitivity is most likely a phase. It can be
disheartening when meditation leads to decreased equanimity, but I think you're right about it being related to catharsis or opening.
That's good understanding Nathan. It isn't easy to communicate ideas that can only be experiential never mind those that are beyond that. As Sosan said "without preference" except that's a negative connotation as you discovered when you imagined applying it. Instead try moving back to the root. In other words accepting you have a preference, delve into that preference trying to find its source within you.
Its easy to scold yourself for having a preference and then there is an attempt to try and force yourself to be neutral. There is a point where you can fool yourself that you are without preference. The mind is a brilliant actor, it can cover the widest cracks and submerge the truth. For a long time you can go around with the calm of a Zen Buddhist, then one day it cracks. It cracks twice. Firstly the Ego fed belief of overcoming the preference and the second time as you realise that you are going to get tied to both that new preferential discovery AND the old preferences.
It is accepting and then exploring these preferences by self inquiry ( keeping that to those specific times and not broader unless you have established deep stillness ) that will reveal the source if you remain open . Each inquiry will reveal another preference and you must keep accepting and digging through these layers. This is not easy, it demands being as strong as steel while being as light and flexible as air.  |
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Nathan
47 Posts |
Posted - Feb 01 2013 : 1:32:13 PM
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I've done some self inquiry in the past. Not delving into specific issues, but holding onto the sense of self until it is seen through for an instant (or at least started to see through). I haven't practiced this for a while because of somewhat violent kriyas (involuntary body movements), and it can be overly exciting to get worked up with energy and bhakti.
Thanks again Karl, et al, for the insightful messages. |
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When Does Equanimity Begin?
