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momo
France
12 Posts |
 Posted - May 05 2012 : 5:01:33 PM
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hi, just wanted to say that today for the first time in 4 weeks - i only started ~ 4 weeks ago - i did not meditate. i suffer from procrastination and i do pray that this will not be my end of meditation, but only a rest day.
my way of doing things is often that i am very excited and eager about them and that i have good results at first, but that then they fade away. i wish to meditate through this cycle! wish me luck! |
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axelschlotzhauer
Germany
150 Posts |
Posted - May 05 2012 : 5:47:24 PM
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Nice to hear from you again.
It seems to be fear problem hidden in the fear not being able to continue to meditate.
Relaxing is the best what you can do. The cleansing process can produce more fear before it leaves the body.
So check your body for unpleasant feelings of all sorts and make leave the body and your mind by softly breathing into these locations in the body. This is very relaxing and calming and brings fresh energies as fear is often a question of lacking and freely flowing stagnating energy or blocks to be cleansed.
Axel
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wigswest
USA
115 Posts |
Posted - May 05 2012 : 9:49:18 PM
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Hi, you might want to cut your meditation time ***way*** down to like 5 minutes per session, just to lessen your resistance while you establish a twice-per-day (or even, right now, just a once-per-day) habit. It takes generally 6-8 weeks to establish a habit, altho your mileage may vary; it might take months for you, doesn't matter :). Once you're secure in that habit, s-l-o-w-l-y ratchet up the minutes until you reach 20 minutes per session.
Remember: you need to look at this as a long-term thing. So if it takes you many many months to get around the resistance in your mind, using all the tricks you can think of, that's okay. And keep reminding yourself that this is something you plan to be doing the rest of your life, like brushing your teeth ;) |
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AumNaturel
Canada
687 Posts |
Posted - May 05 2012 : 10:04:46 PM
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If it helps to add, once your time for practice comes up, or when the opportunity for the day arises, take it and give it no more thought.
As Sri Nisargadatta said, action delayed is action abandoned.
Good luck. |
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momo
France
12 Posts |
Posted - May 06 2012 : 10:04:38 AM
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i realise it might be related to physical fatigue, i have been cycling to work (1 hour one way) after a longer break and that just made me to tired to sit in the usual way. i got a nights rest and today i just meditated on the couch with back support.
so, i will just try to continue as before the rest/break..
i don't think it is fear, i mean, i have felt no fear at all? if it is, it is hidden and i can not feel it at all - i mentioned that i have a problem with procrastination in general, i never thought it could be fear related.. |
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axelschlotzhauer
Germany
150 Posts |
Posted - May 06 2012 : 11:00:30 AM
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As you took an ambitious curve and path it is fine that you intend to continue it with back support till you are recovered from back fatigue.
I will not insist on my fear hypothesis but this a common resistance to meditation bringing such inner world nearer.Procrastination I am doing myself for enjoying me before doing not so joyful work. But it is also a question of fear in the back and kidneys and fatigue there.
But you are young with more energy for overcoming such blocks.
Axel |
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didn't meditate first day in ~4 weeks
