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wakeupneo
USA
171 Posts |
 Posted - Jan 07 2012 : 02:56:20 AM
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I've been quiet reckless in my practices of late. Incorporating other systems and spending many hours a day in meditation.
Recently during a 10-vipassana retreat I started to experiment with the various chakras in the headspace. Naturally, I began getting somewhat of a spiritual high and started and continued to breathe up through the crown.
On day seven during a sitting, there was an intensity, at first i was able to be with it and say this is just fear, but then the intensity grew and scared me right out of my sitting. I was totally disorientated and "fighting" to stay in duality. It felt like I might fly away at times.
Since then, there has been much paranoia, fear associated with this process as it seems to continue. All sorts of irrational beliefs,"am I going to make it thought this, etc" Was even prescribed an anti-anxiety medication to deal with it. Feel totally disconnected at times, memory loss, confusion...although this seems to be more a result of the fear that is coming along with it.
Been doing what i can to ground, including eating red meat, physical exercises, sex, etc... The phenomena has quieted substantially but a lot of of the disorientation seems to continue. Will even probably have to take a sabbatical from my job as it's been too disorientating dealing with others in such a capacity.
Any positive and helpful feedback would be very much appreciated. Any survivor stories of premature openings etc.
Your intentions/prayers for rebalanced will be greatly appreciated.
Love,
j
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Christi
United Kingdom
4429 Posts |
Posted - Jan 07 2012 : 05:29:06 AM
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Hi Wakeupneo,
Sorry to hear about this. It is easily done I know as the experience at the open crown can be so blissful and intoxicating. Sounds like you know how to get yourself back on track with proper grounding methods so I won't give you any more advice there.
Once you are back on track, spend some time re-establishing a stable practice before attempting to go near the crown again. When you do feel ready, read through lesson 199. If you follow the procedure there to the letter, you should not have any problems. Remember that the "testing at the crown" process is a process that takes years before you will be ready to go all out with your attention at the crown.
There is an alternate method for working with the crown offered in lesson 287 which does not involve any crown work. It would be worth you reading through that lesson as well.
Remember that the sensation of being sucked up through the crown, and the fear that often comes with it are just that, a sensation, and a feeling of fear. You don't actually go anywhere, other than right here, and there is nothing to be afraid of.
Hope you manage to get back on track soon.
Christi |
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wakeupneo
USA
171 Posts |
Posted - Jan 07 2012 : 08:39:55 AM
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Thank you Christi,
Glad to know I'm not the only one in this boat. It's so easy to get caught up in pessimism and paranoia that it helps to hear this sort of feedback from others.
Please for everyone reading this let this be a cautionary tale. I used to read cautionary tales and think to myself "I can handle that"...
All I did is set myself back by trying to push the process.
Thank you all for your feedback.
love,
john |
Edited by - wakeupneo on Jan 07 2012 08:40:35 AM |
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JDH
USA
331 Posts |
Posted - Jan 07 2012 : 1:03:26 PM
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Hey Neo,
One of my first meditative experience was a premature crown experience. I was doing the Micro Cosmic Orbit very slowly. Meditating on the chakras (which I only knew from pictures) one by one, which I had read about online. When I got to the root chakra one loop, BOOM - spinal fireworks being launched up and out the top  . I was afraid I had an ego death, and had entered some kind of permanent energy storm which would leave me non-functional. But the actual experience lasted less than an hour. I also felt very off base, scattered, anxious, like a feather in the wind kind of, for a couple weeks afterward. Searching to make sense of that experience is what eventually led me here to do the slow work of opening the same channels which that experience temporarily blasted through.
Anyway, the positive news is I felt better day by day. Something like that really sends ripples and aftershocks of energy through the nervous system for a while, but it does quiet down eventually. As long as you don't meditate for ten days straight again, or go hammering on your crown, this kind of event won't just happen out of the blue. So self-pace, and the anxiety will fade slowly when your nervous system realizes it's not going to come back at you out of nowhere.
Feel better quick |
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jboss0526
USA
10 Posts |
Posted - Jan 07 2012 : 1:12:26 PM
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| I recently had an over powering experience that scared me out of meditation as well. I felt this enormous pressure in my head... Quite overwhelming and distracting. I meditated and redirect the focus of my energy from my head to other areas in my body. After doing this that pressure and disorientation I felt was immediately gone. I have also not meditated in about 2 or 3 days just to give that energy time to slow down and I've felt good since |
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Swan
India
256 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2012 : 09:32:46 AM
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Hi wakeupneo,
Sorry to hear about that, I think I have been there. I am assuming that you know the practice related stuff for grounding and balancing.
I took another step for grounding that I want to share with you. I went for a four day uphill trekking among lush green and at times deliberately climbed bare foot with a pack on my back, and kept walking barefoot when it was raining lightly. It was looking crazy but it was effective and fun!!
If you are planning something like this, I think it is important to keep your mind totally away from any spiritual thoughts (and worry - if you have any) during such initiative, otherwise it may not succeed. I did it by asking two friends to come for the trekking (and they do not share any spiritual interest) and we kept chatting about everything else.
Wish you a speedy recovery ..... |
Edited by - Swan on Jan 08 2012 09:34:09 AM |
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chit-ananda51
India
127 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2012 : 11:43:49 AM
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Hi Swan
That was a nice message. I looked on your profile and found this amusing.. just pasting here though it might be out of context..
quote:
To have something you have never had, you have to be someone you have never been.
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2012 : 11:57:32 AM
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Hi wakeupneo,
I've signed up for a 10 day vipassana retreat in April. The buddhist group who are setting up the whole thing are associated with S.N. Goenka. Your post here seems like quite the alarm. I don't think there are any chakra practices that go along vipassana. Did they teach something of the similar or was it a personal choice of yours.
I read that you must drop off all your old practice routine during the program.
Would appreciate your feedback.
Love,
Ananda |
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wakeupneo
USA
171 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2012 : 4:14:53 PM
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Ananda,
The practice itself is very grounded. I wouldn't worry about it. I went a bit rouge and overdid it with the experiementation that was my problem. You'll be fine my friend. Enjoy!
But stick to the program and all the self-pacing that this board constantly stresses.
love,
j
quote:
Originally posted by Ananda
Hi wakeupneo,
I've signed up for a 10 day vipassana retreat in April. The buddhist group who are setting up the whole thing are associated with S.N. Goenka. Your post here seems like quite the alarm. I don't think there are any chakra practices that go along vipassana. Did they teach something of the similar or was it a personal choice of yours.
I read that you must drop off all your old practice routine during the program.
Would appreciate your feedback.
Love,
Ananda
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2012 : 4:54:45 PM
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Thank you my brother...
Much love to you and hope you get well soon. It will all pass, consider lifting light weights. This always helps me get really grounded.
Salam |
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bewell
1275 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2012 : 9:53:48 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by wakeupneo
It felt like I might fly away at times.
Hi wakeupneo,
As I reflected on all that you wrote, the part that struck me as familiar is the inner feeling as if I am going to fly away. I get that a lot when I am relaxing before going to sleep. I enjoy it because I have learned that when it happens, I can trust gravity to do what it does, and also, I have learned to do some Spinal Breathing Pranayama to balance and ground.
Best,
Be |
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Swan
India
256 Posts |
Posted - Jan 09 2012 : 07:14:37 AM
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| @ Chit-ananda: Thank you |
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wakeupneo
USA
171 Posts |
Posted - Jan 12 2012 : 09:24:39 AM
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Guess some of the issues im having is not knowing what I did and how to correct it. This is leading to anxiety and increased phenomena. It''s been a rough past three weeks.
Some teachers i talked to swear that once K is active there is nothing you can do but surrender to it. Most members on here say that it can be easily grounded.
Similarly, once the crown is opened, can it be closed again? What exactly is the biology of this. Perhaps yogani, if your lurking around it would be humbling to get your feedback.
love,
j
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Kim
Finland
56 Posts |
Posted - Jan 16 2012 : 2:34:02 PM
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I don't agree with the view of crown opening being so harmful or dangerous as it is said in AYP-materials but to fool around with chakras in the head while (!) on 10-day meditation retreat, is something that is simply foolish. I've felt the effects of such ego-based actions in my own flesh and bones, so I know what it is like. And I've almost lost my mind because manipulating ones body-mind-energy system with such a motive inevitably derails ones being into serious imbalance.
Once the grounding detaches, any practice or kriya will increase the imbalance. Therefore, in such cases one should ground oneself. I've written about this in my book under the 1st House. I suggest reading the whole book, it is free of charge. In advanced yoga such as AYP, Kriya Yoga or others, more emphasis should be given to concretic grounding.
A few quotes...
From Body and Breath-section:
"The first thing a yogi, a practitioner of meditation or a spiritual seeker is required to learn is a harmonious, organized, settled and relaxed physical posture. Whatever the body-position is: sitting, standing, moving or lying down, here are principles.
1. Relaxation of the body means that there is no unconscious muscle or nervous stress
which you carry around with you. This is called Physical Relaxation.
2. Awareness of the whole body means that you are intimate with your body. You feel the
skin, muscles, bones and everything in it. You remain aware of what is your physical
vehicle. This is called Physical Awareness.
3. Awareness of the body in relation to the gravity of the Earth is a combination of the
first two principles with the addition of feeling the gravity of the Earth. By sensing the
gravity, it is easy for you to align your body in a natural way. This also makes you rooted and connected to Earth in general and removes a lot of useless stress. In upright
position, this makes your spine straight (spine never actually becomes a completely
straight line as it is curved), sets the head in top of the spine and loosens up the joints and muscles. This is Physical Alignment.
4. Natural relaxed breathing comes as a result of the first three principles. As the body is relaxed without any unneeded muscle or nerve tension and it is aligned naturally, then
the muscles in the stomach and solar plexus area are soft. This allows the breathing to
sink into the lower abdomen and we feel the flowing in- and out breaths gently
inflating and evacuating the lower abdomen, the lower back and touching even the
pelvic floor."
From 1st House-section:
"The 1st Houses consists mainly of the centers between the solar plexus and the tip of the
tailbone/pelvic floor area but the root extends some distance below the body. The center there is referred to as the Earth Chakra and it is very important center to man. The Earth Chakra is also the lower end of what is called the Cosmic Energy or Cosmic Kundalini Current. The highest end reaches up to the 4th House.
Why is the 1st House called a "House of Good Work"? This is very simple. In order to function and operate in the physical world we need to move and use our bodies. The lower torso is the center of gravity and a source of physical power. The alignment of the body needs to be built from the 1st House so that we may perform all physical, mental or intellectual tasks well. If the center of gravity is up in the torso or in the periphery of the body, we are not able to do good work, be content and healthy. This is the main reason why people face so much suffering. Their body-mind is not aligned right. If the 1st House or the base building block is not in its place, we only end up making a hassle, we can't do anything well. We suffer and get sick all the time."
"If this building block of the 1st House is not where and how it is supposed to be, our life will be disorganized. On the other hand, if the 1st House is overemphasized and overused, one becomes a ruthless power-tripper which is seen in martial arts and Zen sometimes. The correct way is to relax and align the body and breath which in turn calms the movements of the mind. This is turning on the "switch" of the 1st House of Enlightenment which reaches all the way down to the Earth-root, a few meters below the perineum. This is an absolutely necessary platform in life and spirituality."
From 4 Houses of Enlightenment in meditation-section:
"Sit down and align your body in a relaxed and upright posture. Allow a few moments for the body to become relaxed and the mind calm down. You may take a few deep breaths to enhance the relaxation. Let the body release all unneeded muscle tension. Close your eyes and keep the eyeballs watching horizontally straight ahead.
Sit still. Become still within. You don't have any intention to make any physical or mental moving. The body will keep breathing, though. You may feel the pulse and heart beating, that is all right, of course.
1. First, let your awareness catch a hold of the area in the 1st House. You feel your lower body, the area between the pelvic floor and the diaphragm. Observe how the breath
descends into the lower body and the breath touches the stomach, especially under the
navel, and the lower back, the root area and the solar plexus. Just watch and feel for
some time.
You can let your awareness extend underneath your body, as well. Go 2-3 meters
straight down from the perineum and feel the 1st House as a whole, the lower part of
the torso and the Earth chakra combined, and watch the flow of the breath."
You can also extend all the way to the center of the Earth. In the book I've written to keep ones eyes closed but I would recommend, in this case, to keep them open.
Doing this will bring you back into your body and ground you. If you wish you can also email me.
Om Nama Shivaya,
- Babananda |
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JDH
USA
331 Posts |
Posted - Jan 16 2012 : 5:05:50 PM
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Hey Neo...
I had anxiety over not knowing what I had done too. Actually I knew what I did, and so do you. But we didn't expect it to cause that result. And really, there's no way to ever expect that until you've experienced it. Anyway, my anxiety slowly faded the more time passed without that kind of energy flow happening again. By slowly I mean a few months. And over those months, the "aftershocks" of smaller energy flows faded also. After those few months, I actually tried to raise the energy through the crown again, and couldn't even do it if I wanted to. This was all about 3-6 months before I found AYP. Since then while I've practiced AYP for 2 years, I've had the crown "re-open" for a grand total of about 30 seconds. And I put "re-open" in quotations because even though some energy was flowing through it, it's still very blocked.
So, your crown has probably closed again already. And you're just having the aftershocks from the whole experience. The nerves are still fried, so to speak. I believe Christi mentioned on the forums once that it's somewhat common for practitioners to get a kundalini surge early on, and then spend years raising the kundalini back up and opening the crown more permanently.
Don't worry about correcting it, just stay away from practices for a while, self pace, ground yourself in non-spiritual things for a few weeks until you feel stable. Time will correct it, and when it does, you'll wish it was back. At least I did.
Good luck, and quick recovery to you. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1553 Posts |
Posted - Jan 17 2012 : 04:47:06 AM
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I have often read in different threads how dangerous a "pre-mature" crown opening can be but in my case the crown was the first thing that opened up and it went gently and smoothly and I only felt bliss and awe. I practiced DM a whole year before adding SB. A couple of weeks after adding SB, I was in the corpse pose, resting when suddenly I felt the build-up at my crown and felt the physical feeling of something sliding open there and energy pouring from out. I experienced it many times after that during sittings and I would wake up in the middle of the night with the sensation that my crown was open and I was fully in touch with my Higher Self. However, there was something weird going on at that time, that I now strongly suspect was due to my crown opening... There was a lot of paranormal activities going-on in my house. At that time I thought it was spirits but with much hind-sight (and reading a small paragraph somewhere in one of Yogani's books that the energy can externalize), I suspect I was leaking energy and creating havoc in my home; Loud bangs like electrical sparks, my shoji walls /doors vibrating, a lot of abnormal noise when on nights; scared the hell out of my children. Then I learned how to throw shields and it stopped. I also learned to better bring the energy to the third eye and the crown activity stopped. I haven't had a crown opening in ages. I do not look for one either. The last thing I had was an opening and getting a view and feel of the lotus flower and seeing the chakra above it some months ago. The point is it has always been gentle and blissful for me.
My two cents
Sey |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4429 Posts |
Posted - Jan 17 2012 : 05:01:25 AM
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Hi SeySorciere,
Crown openings are not always premature. In an ideal world and with safe and effective spiritual practice, they always come right on time. Just because your crown opened first also does not mean that it opened prematurely, it depends on the degree of purification of your subtle body. What Yogani cautions against is the opening of the crown chakra before enough purification work has been done in the rest of the body, that is when it becomes premature and complications can arise.
Christi |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1553 Posts |
Posted - Jan 18 2012 : 02:36:14 AM
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| Yep. Definitely. |
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gatito
United Kingdom
179 Posts |
Posted - Jan 23 2012 : 6:23:17 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by wakeupneo
Ananda,
The practice itself is very grounded. I wouldn't worry about it. I went a bit rouge and overdid it with the experiementation that was my problem. You'll be fine my friend. Enjoy!
But stick to the program and all the self-pacing that this board constantly stresses.
love,
j
quote:
Originally posted by Ananda
Hi wakeupneo,
I've signed up for a 10 day vipassana retreat in April. The buddhist group who are setting up the whole thing are associated with S.N. Goenka. Your post here seems like quite the alarm. I don't think there are any chakra practices that go along vipassana. Did they teach something of the similar or was it a personal choice of yours.
I read that you must drop off all your old practice routine during the program.
Would appreciate your feedback.
Love,
Ananda
A bit more feedback.
http://www.evolver.net/user/vincenz...ssana_course
http://www.buddhistgeeks.com/2011/0...e-of-dharma/
I have no personal experience of Goenka other than being aware that sleep-deprivation, isolation, calorie restricted diet etc. are indeed classic mind-control techniques.
I'm sticking with the AYP system!!
With Love
gatito |
Edited by - gatito on Jan 23 2012 7:00:10 PM |
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Crown opening
