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Sanskritbliss
USA
11 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 23 2011 : 12:10:30 PM
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I have read a lot on here about undoing the practice of watching the breath and also why alternate nostril breathing is unnecessary with AYP.
But still, I have questions. I am seeing clearly why it is counter-productive to keep a foot in multiple paths.
In the Deep Meditation, I feel like I am trying to multi-task doing two disparate things and it is so frustrating! It feels irritating and difficult to think the mantra and not have it aligned with the breath. I really want this to work for me! I catch myself holding my breath unconsciously as I say the mantra, trying not to have them match. I know you are supposed to just let it happen, but if I did, then I would surely be breathing the mantra, which is totally the wrong approach. And then, there is the other issue of thoughts, which adds a third layer to it. I can deal with that, but I wish it was easy for me to just favor the mantra and ignore the breath. For me, breath is far more difficult than thoughts for favoring the mantra. My breathing is really disjointed during meditation because of this.
Also, weeks before finding AYP, I was seeing a TM teacher for checkings after not doing TM for 32 years.
So I went again yesterday. She was pretty insistent about doing alternate nostril breathing, as is the teacher of the amygdala retraining program I am doing to help with my chronic fatigue.
I don't find alternate nostril breathing relaxing and, in fact, even with a nasal strip, often one side or the other is blocked up. But she made me start thinking about it again. It is so hard to know what is true.
I also realized that I wasn't self-pacing enough. I was doing my AYP pranayama full-blown from the start with all the bells and whistles. Today, I reread the instructions and just did gentle in and out breathing up and down the spine. Much less effort given. (and did add some asanas, which also helped.)
The TM teacher reaffirmed what Yogani says about the deep cleansing of this type of meditation. But following the breath feels so relaxing. Still, I don't want to mix methods. Though I am listening to a great yoga nidra CD during the day, which is helping with the relaxation.
For new people, I think Deep Meditation is easier than for those of us who have been on so many other paths and have done breath stuff.
I really want some relief from my chronic fatigue symptoms and anxiety. But I guess I just believe Yogani and the TM teacher that holding onto the breath as my anchor is not going to get to the true deep release and spirituality I seek. Though there are many millions of Buddhists and others who will disagree.
And my amygdala retraining program uses a lot of breathing with calming down the anxiety, which is very effective for me.
So I just wanted to write to get others' thoughts about all this. It is also really hard to stop "path" shopping. Just got an Ananda email about why Hong Sau is such an effective technique. :) Ah well.
Thanks,
Susan |
Edited by - Sanskritbliss on Jul 23 2011 6:47:59 PM |
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whippoorwill
USA
450 Posts |
Posted - Jul 24 2011 : 11:38:11 AM
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I realize I'm a beginner trying to advise someone more advanced, but well, here goes anyway...
Your post brought some vivid imagery to my mind's eye. It was of someone standing on two racing horses with the reins in her teeth. What happens when the horses go different directions? Put both feet on one horse, sit down, take the reins in your hands, and let the other horse go. It doesn't matter which horse you choose, though I like the AYP horse. 
When you do make your choice, let go of everything you know, everything you expect, and just do the practices exactly as prescribed for at least 3 months and see what happens. Most importantly, let go of the expectation that the practice (whatever it is) will help with the chronic fatigue, and just do the practice without expectation for it's own sake. Best of luck to you on your path!
--Liz
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Edited by - whippoorwill on Jul 24 2011 12:01:14 PM |
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Sanskritbliss
USA
11 Posts |
Posted - Jul 24 2011 : 8:50:05 PM
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Thank you so much. That actually seemed pretty wise advice to me. :) I read it right before my afternoon meditation. I appreciated your taking the time to write. It's funny, since writing my post, I found two lessons in AYP where Yogani actually talks about those who are oversensitive and the fact that they may need to use the breath as the mantra and also to do the alternate nostril breathing as it is less intense!
However, I did do the regular routine this afternoon after reading your pep talk!
I'm still really struggling with the mantra, but will post in the forum on deep meditation.
Thank you again. I loved your analogy of the horses. Hope your path is going smoothly.
Susan
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Jul 24 2011 : 9:22:59 PM
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Hi Susan,
Chronic fatigue is more likely a physical problem than mental.
Try going to this popular health site:
http://www.mercola.com/
and search for "chronic fatigue" or click the link there. There is quite a bit of information.
Also make sure you are eating lots of raw veggies (salad type stuff), drinking 2 liters of water per day, and exercising three or more times a week. "Peak 8" is best and easiest, also on the same site. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1553 Posts |
Posted - Jul 25 2011 : 04:50:49 AM
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Dear Susan - I think you are worrying about the non breath synchronisation with mantra issue way too much. Just relax - if they happen to sync, just let it. It is recommended that you do not sync. them deliberately but if they fall into place by themselves, stop worrying about it and just let it flow. Don't pay attention to what your breath is doing. When I happen to notice (not very often)my mantra is at times in sync with my breath and other times with my heartbeat and other times not in sync with anything. The key is not to think about it, not to pay attention to it.
Good luck
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Holy
796 Posts |
Posted - Jul 31 2011 : 9:58:53 PM
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Hi Susan,
to add to the last posting... even if thinking about it happens, or attention is drawn to it or noticing happens or whatever, just come back to the mantra =)
The instruction is already perfect, but most don't trust the instruction. It is natural, but whatever happens, as long as coming back to the mantra again and gain and again is intentionally done, then this is perfect and will lead to all that is described on this site.
To ANB, it is a good tool for the beginning. It opens the side channels and calms down the system, if you breath sloowly. But it can be a distraction too if you spend more time on it and less on SBP which will do the real good thing.
In the beginning, it is hard, as you have to believe and trust others. Over time, you will know by yourself and are independant of opinions of others which mostly are believe based anyway.
It helps to look for systems which have a good output of high quality people ;) Most of those Nr.1 systems have not one master and xyz students. And surely they don't have unrealized teachers en masse. Premium techniques will lead to premium practitioners. And if you look more closely, most of those best of systems will work on
- silence / awareness / witness
- the central channel
So if you want the honey, look if whatever you do adresses these both lines efficiently and intensly. The rest is really playing and fooling around.
ANB is used for preperation.
Hong Sau is used as a preperational meditation technique too.
Watching the breath will do some good, but has its limit in deepening into what always is.
So all of this is good, but you won't use them till the end if there is no real deal someone advicing you to do one of these three till the end :)
There is no living authority left that will advice you on something less than the best what you can have today (2011). Adress the self and andress the central channel and you have all and beyond.
Love |
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Question on separating breath & alternate nostril
