|
|
 |
|
| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
brother neil
USA
752 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 19 2011 : 6:29:23 PM
|
Brother Neil here, havent been on much but I value your opinions and wanted to ask a question, first an update.
been in costa rica for the last nine months and have been attending the Sat Yoga Institute and participating in quite a few of the activities and have been meditating more regularly then in the past, but have not fully surrendered to this path, yet I see that and I will be discussing that with them and work on getting through those issues. The food at the institute is phenominal, Radha is a great cook, been cooking more, and living with my kitten I picked up off the streets.
on to my question.
Ive been reading Paulo Coelho since ive been here, I belive i am on my eigth book of his. Anyways, he does have a lot of enightening information and some of it has helped me to further deepen my understanding of what and why I eat, also the purpose of a spiritual guide and sticking to a path.
one of the things that disheartened me was in the book The Zahir, To some extent I imagine this book is a recount of his life with his wife, but I could be mistaken. in the beggining of the book he seems very non chalant about sleeping with women other then his wife and he also seems to have little reaction when he finds out she has been sleeping with other men. So why did I find this disheartening?
well im not enlightened yet, maybe I will be one day and maybe I wont, time will tell. However I believe in manogamy, when married or dating someone, however I also understand the message that he and many other have written that you cannot own or possess someone, and if you try and do so you only end up enslaving yourself and them. The concept of not being able to possess someone is something I am working on and I pray that I come to full acceptance of this.
so what are the enlightened ones opinion of monogamy, is it a true value, is the concept of it a hinderance to spiritual growth, or is it a divine paradox where it is both and neither are good nor bad. How would some of you spiritually advanced souls feel if your significant other had slept with someone else.
thanks for any sharings of your experiences and insight
Brother Neil |
|
|
WoodDragon
USA
56 Posts |
Posted - Apr 20 2011 : 08:10:08 AM
|
Monogamy is not for everyone, but it is also something that many feel is important. I do not believe anyone can say what is best for another person. We all make choices in life and as long as we are choosing along our natures and with Purity of Intent, than it is all good.
As far as my own views, I do not own anyone, no one owns me. To own my wife is to own myself for we are all part of One. To Love anyone, you must Love yourself, to have Compassion for anyone, you must have Compassion for yourself, as such there is no difference between loving another person and loving oneself. The math remains the same.
I have been in many situations in this life, and all I can say is that when loving relations which lead to physical acts of sharing such love exist in a space of Purity of Intent then there are no difficulties. Open honesty and open communication, open hearts and open feelings are key. Any one of these fails, any hidden agendas and all of it falls to fruitless activities.
I cannot define an emotional relationship as deep as a lifelong partnership as being based upon sexual convenience (which unfortunately is how many see marriage or any form of long term partnership) or sexual terms. The reason the partnership is there is a deep connection of heart and mind, spirits which flow well together and have chosen to share life and all that it brings. Nothing of the physical world can harm such a partnership unless the participants allow it to.
Jealousy, greed, shame, longing are all symptoms of ego, a clinging to "I" and thus a form of Impurity. Possession, ownership and obsession are also symptoms of ego. It is the ego which clings to the material, it is the ego which hampers progress. This is the thing which attaches us to the world and does not let us see a clear Truth. We own nothing. We are everything.
Just a point of view from one who has traveled far. |
 |
|
|
cosmic
USA
821 Posts |
Posted - Apr 20 2011 : 11:57:21 AM
|
Welcome back, Brother Neil 
I've missed your words and kind presence here. I may come back and comment, but right now I have a date with a lengthy mantra  Hope life is good!
Much Love
cosmic |
|
|
|
BuddhiHermit
United Kingdom
84 Posts |
Posted - Apr 20 2011 : 2:06:24 PM
|
Hello Brother Neil,
As always, it appears to depend on the individual.
Just because a person is monogamous, does not mean they are possessive. They may simply prefer to go deeply into their relationship.
Just because a person is polygamous, does not mean they are non-possessive. They may simply prefer to expand themselves to commune with all.
The fact that you find something disheartening, only really tells you something about yourself - You prefer to deepen a single relationship.
Knowing this, you can now benefit from the wisdom of others, without feeling the need to compromise you own approach.
Namaste
|
|
|
|
Chiron
Russia
397 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2011 : 03:47:08 AM
|
Here's Chiron's theory:
It may take a number of lifetimes for two kindred souls to achieve perfect unity and liberation from the dual. Connections need to be established on all levels, the physical, astral/emotional, causal/mental. If one engages in relationships outside of this Work, then that is polluting and redirecting energy from your kindred soul, which will lengthen the process. So if one is on such a path, then it is important not to give into lust and avoid frivolous endeavours which one knows will not last.
aum |
|
|
|
woosa
United Kingdom
382 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2011 : 07:53:18 AM
|
Hi Brother Neil
At the end of the day don't try and do anything that a an enlightened person has done. I think this is where we have gone wrong now and in the past. Look at all the scandals that come with 'guruhood' (if that's a word) instead of just practicing a bare bones system ala AYP and finding out from your heart what is right and wrong for you.
The more we open we will know what is true and what is not. Beliefs are just that, can a belief be the truth? Don't we have to experience it to know. And then it won't be a belief anymore.
Why are you downhearted that Coelho was/is? a polygamist? Do you want to emulate his behaviour to become enlightened?
Isn't monogamy just our cultural conditioning? Other cultures have polygamy and other people's beliefs are abstinence altogether. And the people who carry them out, I guess, are okay with that.
All I do is practice, and if I read about enlightened people rambling on about 'hey the view from here is great' etc then fine, but I just practice anyway. |
|
|
|
nodoubt
India
90 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2011 : 11:41:15 AM
|
| Whatever you do be truthful. |
|
|
|
brother neil
USA
752 Posts |
Posted - Apr 21 2011 : 4:11:43 PM
|
wooddragon, thanks for your reply, budi, I feel what your saying and the encouragement to follow what I believe. Thanks for the kind words cosmic, reply if you wish or dont if you dont want to, im not gonna attach too much to that chiron, I would rather hear your views, unless of course your view is as the teacher you mentioned, and if so, thanks. woosa, why do I find it diesheartening, well cause of his writings I guess I look up to him and would prefer a higher moral standard, yet this is an attachment and me judging him, and others way of life. I see the way he described some things in his book as cold and distant, yet nevertheless I still enjoy his books and have found much inspiration and personal understanding of my path in reading them. part of it may also have to do with my my mother cheating on my father and splitting up the family. am I over that, does it still haunt my soul, Im not sure.
thanks again for your replies
moving onward
Brother Neil
|
|
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
| AYP Public Forum |
© Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) |
|
|
|
|
Hello AYP
