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 On the Verge of Awakening. feedback pls.
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Chris Wallace

Philippines
6 Posts

Posted - May 20 2010 :  02:30:24 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
Hi there,

Please give me some feedback from the heart. Here's my story-

After years of searching and experimentation; I think I'm on the verge of Awakening. I've already come to the end of the line intellectually, so I'm talking about the body catching up, "the beginning of the end" of my duality.

I've been sitting full-lotus for 10 years (I can sit for 2 hours before pain in the bottom foot/ankle becomes too strong). A path was cleared along the way, inside the spine, up to the point between the shoulder blades, then it went dormant for a long while. LAST YEAR, I began feeling and hearing crackling (kind of like cracking knuckles) inside the spine, being drawn up on inhalation. It has slowly, consistently day by day, over the past year risen up to the top of the spine. I am greatly looking forward to it hitting the pineal gland!! I really can't wait! I'm dying to know when it will finally happen.. I think its close..



Christi

United Kingdom
4515 Posts

Posted - May 20 2010 :  07:15:24 AM  Show Profile  Visit Christi's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Chris,

Great to hear that you are on the verge of awakening! No one can really say what will happen when, but if you are engaged in a proven and regular spiritual practice, then you will certainly awaken.

If you are not already practicing it then spinal breathing pranayama is a great accelerator in terms of purifying the sushumna nadi.

http://www.aypsite.org/41.html

All the best

Christi
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Chris Wallace

Philippines
6 Posts

Posted - May 20 2010 :  07:56:19 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks Christi, I'm certainly looking forward to it. The spinal breathing seems like it does the same thing as the Backward Flowing Method (See author JJ Semple). The BFM is said to make the "energy" go into auto-pilot, so no visualization is needed. I'm hesitant to start Spinal Breathing, because for the past year, I have felt the BFM at work inside me (slow, but effective and constant). I can feel the energy slowly making its way up the spine day, by day and "if it aint broke, don't fix it" right? Since the energy feels like its almost up to the point inside the brain now, I'm not sure I should interfere further.

Does anybody here do full lotus for long periods, without unlocking the legs? That posture is intriguing to me and I want to find out more about its deep secrets.

Also- anyone feel the crackling, crumbling sensation, rising up the spine during inhalation? When it hit the brain, did you have the intense, ongoing kundalini experience?

thanks

quote:
Originally posted by Christi

Hi Chris,

Great to hear that you are on the verge of awakening! No one can really say what will happen when, but if you are engaged in a proven and regular spiritual practice, then you will certainly awaken.

If you are not already practicing it then spinal breathing pranayama is a great accelerator in terms of purifying the shushumna nadi.

http://www.aypsite.org/41.html

All the best

Christi

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Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - May 20 2010 :  08:52:45 AM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Chris, to be honest with you i have felt on the verge of awakening so many times that i stopped believing in it... i gave up honestly, and if anything my desire isn't for enlightenment anymore but for having no desire for nothingness i really don't know how to explain that but it's something that hit my being from inside the silence and it was like a realization yet it's not it's a new desire in a way a replacement for the desire of enlightenment.

enough mind games...

just my humble experience on the cracking stuff in the spine, i felt it in the middle of the spine parallel to the solar plexus and along the neck and in the middle of the head between the pituary and pineal glands and what was left was an emptiness in there and that experience lasted for a couple of days and there was a centering there then it went into the background.

wishing you the best on your path.

take care bro

Edited by - Ananda on May 20 2010 08:54:36 AM
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Christi

United Kingdom
4515 Posts

Posted - May 20 2010 :  09:38:30 AM  Show Profile  Visit Christi's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Chris,

If you already have a practice that is working for you, then there is no need to change it in any way.

I used to feel the crackling sensation in the spine. It came, on and off, for a couple of years and then stopped altogether as the energy flows smoothed out. Bringing the kundalini to the centre of the head is a stage on the path of awakening. There can be a lot of lights, and fireworks, but it is by no means the goal of yoga. Beyond that, is the rising into the crown with the melting into pure bliss consciousness, and there are stages beyond that too. I would agree with Ananda that yoga is more like a constant awakening which continues to expand rather than a one-time event.

You may find these pages useful:

http://www.aypsite.org/35.html

http://www.aypsite.org/85.html

All the best

Christi
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solo

USA
167 Posts

Posted - May 21 2010 :  08:16:47 AM  Show Profile  Visit solo's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Chris...you might still be years away or even a lifetime away. I don't think anyone can say with any degree of certainty. The best advice I can give is just go about life and forget about awakening. Keep meditating, kind of like brushing your teeth. Other than that, just go about your business and see if it happens.

PS...I claim no special wisdom or knowledge. I am not a guru or an enlightened master. Just someone who started this process 3 years ago.
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JDH

USA
331 Posts

Posted - May 21 2010 :  11:31:45 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Had cracking in the spine near the base of the neck. When I started spinal breathing pranayama, it would happen 3 times during every inhalation. Same 3 points. Now it only happens once in a while, but still near the base of the neck. It's similar to if I would crack my neck by twisting it manually.
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Chris Wallace

Philippines
6 Posts

Posted - May 21 2010 :  2:28:08 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks everybody, interesting to hear about the crackling spines!

Heheh, 'nice forget enlightenment' comments too. :)

I'm particularly into accounts about Kundalini rising and sending the subject into an everlasting intense transformation.

Any full-lotus enthusiasts out there?
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Chiron

Russia
397 Posts

Posted - May 22 2010 :  05:27:34 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Posted this about padmasana a while back:
http://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic....OPIC_ID=2723

Have done around two hours in it as well. And from what I know it is nowhere near enough to shut down the brainwave patterns. I sit in it whenever and wherever I can, but the pain is still great after 5 years of practice.

I sincerely believe, from what I have experienced and read, that just by sitting in this posture one can achieve liberation, but it would have to be quite a long period of time if done without other practices and would require ALOT of willpower.

Edited by - Chiron on May 22 2010 08:04:40 AM
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Chris Wallace

Philippines
6 Posts

Posted - May 24 2010 :  02:29:06 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Chiron,

YES. When I first realized that about the posture, it was like I heard the punchline to the biggest practical joke ever. I've been doing almost 10 years of practice and on one side, 2 hours 12 minutes is the time I can hold it. On the other around 1.5 hours. If I do it everyday these times increase. So you're doing quite well for only 5 years, heheh. My Chinese Zen teacher Sheng Yen said that once you get past the pain, an "unusual bliss" kicks in. At that point he said you have to go beyond it without getting attached to the pleasant feeling. A few years ago I started sitting directly on the floor, instead of using a meditation cushion.
Currently, I have only one barrier preventing me from leaping forward with the pose- after the said times, on the bottom leg side, in the ankle/top of foot (other side of the sole) a gnawing pain starts that is hard to endure. Other than that, I'm almost at a point where I can hold it for very long periods. Don't know how long this threshold will take to beat, and its possible that once I do overcome it, another one will pop up.. we'll see...

I heard 'dealing with pain using relaxed awareness' is another boon of sitting FL. They say after you can comfortably do it for 2.5 - 3 hours, you really start cookin' with gas. So sounds like we're not that far off.

The current spinal sweep I'm going through makes me wonder if Kundalini is going to rise before I even master FL. Ahhhhhh, it sounds great, being able to just sit down and let the energy do what it do.

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SeySorciere

Seychelles
1571 Posts

Posted - May 25 2010 :  03:38:31 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Dear Chris

The policy here at AYP is to let someone continue with his/her practice if he is well-established, comfortable and making progress with it - so this is purely my personal opinion. You have "suffered" thru' 10 years of Lotus-sitting to achieve what a new-comer will achieve with AYP in a couple of weeks. I would strongly recommend you switch to AYP

my humble opinion
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Chiron

Russia
397 Posts

Posted - May 25 2010 :  05:08:08 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
^ That's quite an exaggeration to say the least. The karmic washoff from 10 years of padmasana is incomparably larger than anything anybody can do with AYP in a couple of weeks.

There is no need to switch to anything anyhow, as most AYP practices can be performed in the lotus posture as well.

Chris, I have read the same thing, that after 3 hours it is supposed to become much easier. Its getting there that is difficult. I have no teacher who can provide the extra discipline either. I have tried repeating mantras and affimations ie. "This body is not mine, I am not this body" etc.. Tried transcending the pain and contemplating through it. Sometimes the bliss in the heart chakra takes over and overshadows the pain in the legs but eventually the pain always wins over. And the more I practice it the more pain I tend to feel, ie. if I practice continuously for a number of days I can get to the point where even 15 minutes becomes unbearable.. But I'm not about to give up.. not while this fire is burning inside :)
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manigma

India
1065 Posts

Posted - May 25 2010 :  05:24:18 AM  Show Profile  Visit manigma's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Feeling any type of pain (body or mental) is impossible when you are in 'witness' state. Even if someone cuts off your legs you won't feel any pain.

Only when you come out from the witness state you start feeling the pains.

This is my experience.

If one can develop the witness along with practicing asanas and remain established in it this state... he/she can sit for hours, days or even years.
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Chiron

Russia
397 Posts

Posted - May 25 2010 :  06:47:32 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Ok, so if that's your experience then how long can you sit in the full lotus posture manigma?
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manigma

India
1065 Posts

Posted - May 25 2010 :  07:55:55 AM  Show Profile  Visit manigma's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I can't do Padmasana... I have big thighs.

I sit in Siddhasana. My belly goes inwards automatically (must be some bandha like moolbandha) and I don't feel any hunger.

Its like going into hibernation or back into the mother's womb.

The maximum I have stayed in Siddhasana is 7 hours. I was an amateur then and wanted everything instantly. It was a bad idea.

Now I sit naturally and it goes for 30-40 mins only. But if I wish I can sit as long as I want.
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Chris Wallace

Philippines
6 Posts

Posted - May 29 2010 :  06:21:56 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Its nice to chat with you all. Look at all the different international locations of the posters!

Chiron,

Its an interesting posture FL is. Glad you agree, and its nice to have someone that 'gets it'.
Definitely hang in there, but also (as it sounds like you're doing) pursue other "doors".
Patience is key and there are different ways to approach practicing FL; multiple shorter sessions a day vs. one long sitting a day, which side to use, doing it while watching TV vs. meditating etc. Endure the pain well, but know when enough is enough for your current situation.
If you stick with it, over the years it gets better as u know.

Manigma,
Sounds like you are quite a proficient meditater. How lucky u are to get to experience those states.

CW

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