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brother neil

USA
752 Posts

Posted - Jan 03 2010 :  10:16:21 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
well for the past 16 years I searched for God, the details dont really matter much though. while doing this that was my focus and slowly I left the joys of life by the wayside in this one pointed focus. As far as believing in "one path", i believe whatever works for someone, whether it be praying to jesus, buhda, etc... if it works for them, then it works for them. IN the past I would try and disprove many things, but hey, the universe/God is full of possibilities and maybe Jesus does help them. I believe anything really is possible. I prayed to jesus the other night and had a visual image of a situation, I felt compassion for the people but also a heavy heart.

So finding God was my sole aim, and along the way I have been humbled. I also had experiences of extreme happiness, on the other hand I saw things that scared me. SUch as "I create my own reality" but do "i" create the world, what other people do, etc...

I used to believe in a right and wrong, now, to each his own. So dropping judgment, even though it may come up from time to time, has been a positive effect. I intend to meditate, if nothing else to quiet the mnd, and practicing non judgement awareness, even though there is no such thing as practice. :wink: lately I have been feeling more relaxed, and doing the solar enhancement leaves me a bit more out of my head so to speak. also eating more healthy then in the past for it only makes sense for the body. I still pray as well, I like to read inspiring stories, etc...

SO...... I would like to reconnect with people, and the earth/plants/stars, etc...sometimes I get frustrated that I dont look at the sun and say WOW. I used to really like volleyball and golf, and suring but over time it faded for the the only things that mattered were finding God" then it became finding enlightenment. Much of my life I spent distancing myself from others, how does one get back to connection when one has been avoiding that? I believe anything is possible yet I dont fully believe in anything, (meaning if you do this and this, then this happens) except for here and now. as of now I do spend more time in the present, tomorrow does not seam real, but yet I will probably wake up then/now. Thanks for being a place to express this.
thanks
brother Neil

NagoyaSea

424 Posts

Posted - Jan 04 2010 :  12:51:26 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Heartfelt thanks for this beautiful post Brother Neil. Much empathy on this end for your journey. For reconnecting, I don't know. I hope you are just enjoying 'being' in peace and love and will take what ever opportunity may present itself to reconnect.
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Yonatan

Israel
849 Posts

Posted - Jan 04 2010 :  05:52:23 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi neil,

Thanks for sharing.
Reconnection, maybe just intend to, samyama-style if you want..

Peace
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SeySorciere

Seychelles
1571 Posts

Posted - Jan 04 2010 :  07:21:44 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Dear Brother Neil - Thank you for this very interesting post. I get the impression that most who search for God/The Divine disconnect from people around them to do so (look at all the prophets, they all isolated themselves at some stage AND most did not have a wife & family). I am somewhat confused by that, this disconnection from people. One on hand I can understand it, disconnecting stop the negative energies from other people from reaching you. When you are not close to anyone, you do not need to feel concern for their problems, and become involve in their lifes. You become detached from worldly issues and can devote more time to your inner self and your search. But, but, but.. it is one thing to find the divine (enlightenment) and another thing to live the Divine, be the Divine. That I think is best expressed through relationships... with people ! So I totally get you when you say you need to reconnect.
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SeySorciere

Seychelles
1571 Posts

Posted - Jan 04 2010 :  07:26:44 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I've just thought of something else - maybe that is why Yogani recommends that after your half hour or so of meditation you simple go on with your daily life and activities; and not that you spend all day meditating... it's find the Divine and bring it to your daily relationships!
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brother neil

USA
752 Posts

Posted - Jan 04 2010 :  6:10:25 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by SeySorciere

I've just thought of something else - maybe that is why Yogani recommends that after your half hour or so of meditation you simple go on with your daily life and activities; and not that you spend all day meditating... it's find the Divine and bring it to your daily relationships!


yes, that makes a lot of sense.

kind of reminds me of the movie, into the wild, where the guy goes off and when he is alone realizes that it was his friends and family he wished to be with.
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brother neil

USA
752 Posts

Posted - Jan 04 2010 :  6:15:19 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
thanks nag and yon
one of the issues with reconnecting seems to be thinking things< I talked with a lot of people today, but it is like a voices says, "thats not good enough" or "those arent who you want to connect with" etc.... well anyways, I had two good salads for dinner, a made from scratch ceaser and a simple tomato salad, I picked up the recipe in costa rica. chopped tomato, some lemon or lime, and a sprinkle of salt.
adios amigos
Neil
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wakeupneo

USA
171 Posts

Posted - Jan 05 2010 :  09:25:06 AM  Show Profile  Visit wakeupneo's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by SeySorciere

Dear Brother Neil - Thank you for this very interesting post. I get the impression that most who search for God/The Divine disconnect from people around them to do so (look at all the prophets, they all isolated themselves at some stage AND most did not have a wife & family). I am somewhat confused by that, this disconnection from people. One on hand I can understand it, disconnecting stop the negative energies from other people from reaching you. When you are not close to anyone, you do not need to feel concern for their problems, and become involve in their lifes. You become detached from worldly issues and can devote more time to your inner self and your search. But, but, but.. it is one thing to find the divine (enlightenment) and another thing to live the Divine, be the Divine. That I think is best expressed through relationships... with people ! So I totally get you when you say you need to reconnect.



If an alcoholic wants to stop drinking it's probably best for him to stop hanging out with other alcoholics. At least initially until one has enough integrity/maturity not to loses themSelves. this has been my experience.

J
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Balance

USA
967 Posts

Posted - Jan 05 2010 :  10:48:41 AM  Show Profile  Visit Balance's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Just maybe there is no reconnection necessary, or even possible. If it is a desire to create a connection between seemingly separate entities then it seems a monumental task to undertake with completeness. The apparant separateness of ourselves and others often seems as though there are completely different galaxies spinning in their own space while regarding one another. If we look at our greater understanding of self-realization in our yoga paths we can more easily find the truth of ourselves and the world around us as being already the connection that we seek with others. The individual galaxies may seem to be a universe apart, but all are equally of the one stardust. Recognizing that might make outer connection less important as a thing to fulfill, but perhaps easier and more natural as acceptance.

Edited by - Balance on Jan 05 2010 10:57:52 AM
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cosmic

USA
821 Posts

Posted - Jan 05 2010 :  5:00:12 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hey brother neil

I can relate to wanting to reconnect. Not only with people, but with life, my body, the earth, nature, etc. Personally, I feel that the isolation in taking up spiritual practices is meant to be temporary. Some people may get stuck in it to escape from reality, but I think eventually we need to return to the world, so to speak.

Somewhere Yogani wrote that at some point inner silence wants to move and become active, from its blending with ecstasy.

I think what you're going through is natural. You've gone inside, now it's time to come back out

Thanks for the salad recipe

Love
cosmic
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brother neil

USA
752 Posts

Posted - Jan 05 2010 :  8:54:26 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
thanks balance for the post
enjoy the salad cosmic
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Yonatan

Israel
849 Posts

Posted - Jan 06 2010 :  07:44:13 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
MMMMMMMMM.. salad..

Love [img]icon_heart.gif[/img]
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brother neil

USA
752 Posts

Posted - Jan 12 2010 :  8:25:24 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
in the past week I went out to dinner with a couple friends, went to dinner with my grandma and dad. hung out with my mom, sister, and uncle whom I had not seen in a couple years. also, Grandma bought me four shirts, two for the cold and two for when it warms up. She has a knack for picking out clothes as the shirts are nicer then most I have picked out for myself.
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