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stoat
USA
12 Posts |
 Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 11:44:59 AM
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Hello. This is my first post here, and in fact my first experience of a site such as this. Please forgive me if I do anything inappropriate, or perhaps this post is too long. I'd appreciate feedback about such things if anyone has any. Basically, I'm looking to introduce myself, describe my deal, and perhaps get some feedback from those of you who are more experienced with these sorts of things.
My path hasn't entailed conscious attention to the energy technology of yoga. As a side effect to what I was doing, various phenomena have emerged which I see others referring to here as siddhis. My ex-teacher, with whom I'm still in communication with by letter, believes that these represent me being stuck on my path. I have certainly had the same constellation of them for quite a while, and it is true that I'm not engaging in any practices these days. Perhaps a list of these would be helpful, although the details don't seem important.
Three or four major synchronicities a day, the occasional psychic experience, energy in my hands that heal people in minor ways, knowing the gender of fetuses, being able to quiet babies with energy, occasional prophetic dreams, receiving darshan in dreams, -- well, you get the idea. On what sometimes feels like the other side of the coin, I have terrible short-term memory, only occasional joy, weird digestive problems such as not being able to eat sugar without consequences that doctors can't make sense out of, lots of joint pain, etc. My ex-teacher believes that this stuff emerges from having fairly smooth kundalini energy, which he probably did something to unleash. At any rate, I find that my ego oscillates between grandiosity and wondering if I have mental health issues. I tend to get lost in the meaninglessness of things -- too much attention to the absolute, I guess. And my life feels like a surreal movie unfolding before my eyes, which I guess is too much witness/disconnection.
In a nutshell, that's me, and it seems as though I might be a familiar character to those of you on this site, despite the fact that I don't run into other people with these things and don't have much in the way of a forum to speak about them. To some degree I guess I could predict what sort of feedback I might get, but it seems much better to actually find out than make assumptions about something like this. In my heart, I think I know that I should be pursuing yogic practices and that advice to me to do so is eminently sensible. I have no idea, really, whether I'm prepared to pursue such a course. I certainly don't mind being aimed at them, as I see other people being aimed when they ask questions.
Thank you. |
Edited by - stoat on Oct 29 2009 11:49:50 AM |
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miguel
Spain
1197 Posts |
Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 3:11:56 PM
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wellcome to ayp forums stoat. |
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Konchok Ösel Dorje
USA
545 Posts |
Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 3:51:08 PM
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| Hi Stoat, You are in good company. All our super powers are certified. Just kidding. You are in good company, however. Many of us here have gone through what you are going through. The general advice is going to be take it in stride. Enlightenment is a full-circle experience. After you venture off into "woo woo" land, as I call it, you eventually end up back where you started, but with a renewed sense of awe and wonder at the world. The important lesson that gets you around the bend is to practice, not only to practice, but to practice with a sense of dispassion. Getting caught up in the emotional dramas that unfold on the path is where every yogi goes wrong, myself included. As you practice, all the senses magnify in power. Siddhis happen. It can be bewildering. One must, must, must remain still in these events, dispassionate, courageous, and above-all vigilant. |
Edited by - Konchok Ösel Dorje on Oct 29 2009 3:58:00 PM |
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Yonatan
Israel
849 Posts |
Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 4:05:51 PM
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| Welcome stoat, awesome Konchok. Good post. |
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Kirtanman
USA
1651 Posts |
Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 5:43:46 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by stoat
In my heart, I think I know that I should be pursuing yogic practices and that advice to me to do so is eminently sensible. I have no idea, really, whether I'm prepared to pursue such a course. I certainly don't mind being aimed at them, as I see other people being aimed when they ask questions.
Thank you.
Hi Stoat,
Welcome to the AYP Forum!
And, as Konchok said: you're in good company -- and I "second" everything Konchok wrote, 100%.
The comment I'd like to add, is:
Practicing continuously tends to smooth out all symptoms: physical, emotional, mental, psychic; siddhis, and so on.
In yogic writings, siddhis are mentioned as obstructions or obstacles, which is what they actually are. I don't mean that it's a problem to have them; that's not *why* they're categorized as obstacles. It's because siddhis tend to keep the illusions related to being a "separate self" in place, which prevents yoga (union).
And, as Konchok wrote, many practitioners venture into "woo woo land" ... not so much because of the siddhis themselves, but because of limited mind's reaction to them (which usually boils down to: "Woo Hoo!"  <- Good term, Konchok!  ) ... hence Konchok's recommendation for dispassion.
The "Woo Hoo" isn't a problem in and of itself; enjoying anything is fine .... even siddhis. It's more that limited mind tends to evaluate siddhis as meaning that you're somehow different or special or unique or whatever ... which is exactly the opposite of what siddhis actually indicate.
What siddhis actually indicate is that you're tapping into the one field of awareness-reality.
In and of itself, that's good; awesome, in fact.
The problem is in limited mind's interpretation of such things .... so you really do want to just keep on keeping on, as they say ... until you're all the way home.
And, by the way ... as to whether or not you're "prepared to pursue such a course" of taking up yoga practices .... it doesn't have to be a major decision; just start with a bit of spinal breathing and meditation as recommended in the AYP Lessons; they're both easy, and something anyone can do ... and most people find them enjoyable, even at the start.
I hope this helps, and again, welcome!
Wholeheartedly,
Kirtanman |
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Anthem
1608 Posts |
Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 10:28:18 PM
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| Welcome Stoat to the AYP forums and thanks for sharing your story. |
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stoat
USA
12 Posts |
Posted - Oct 29 2009 : 11:20:26 PM
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| Thank you all. I'm going to try to reply to everyone all at once, so pardon if this is a bit disjointed. Awe and wonder would be nice, although I don't think I can say that's back where I started. I think I do a pretty good job of not being distracted by siddhis, and I'd have to say that dispassion is one of my strong suits. My problems seem to be more along the lines of applying myself in a proactive way versus trusting that everything I need is embedded in my path. I think I get carried away with the idea that I don't need to do anything special. Then I don't do anything at all besides tend to day to day business. I like the idea that I don't need to make a major decision to start with practices. My resistance tells me different, trickster that it is. I guess everything would be okay at a level where I wouldn't be posting except for this sense of stuckness, as manifested by continued physical and psychic phenomena that don't seem to evolve. Is your (collective) sense that one needs to do stuff to keep moving along, or it'll happen anyway -- perhaps less elegantly? --me. |
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Konchok Ösel Dorje
USA
545 Posts |
Posted - Oct 30 2009 : 11:58:03 AM
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| You must practice and peer deep into samadhi to destroy the remnants of delusion. |
Edited by - Konchok Ösel Dorje on Oct 30 2009 11:59:50 AM |
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Akasha
421 Posts |
Posted - Oct 31 2009 : 9:46:33 PM
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Welcome stoat and make yourself at home at AYP.... |
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YogaIsLife
641 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2009 : 09:33:54 AM
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Great story Stoat, thanks for sharing. And welcome! I think you are in the right place to "unstuck" yourself here in AYP  . But only you know best, of course. My feeling is that practice is important and ongoig (as is the flow of life, never twice the same) but please listen to the most senior participants! You had some good advice already in this thread it seemed to me. All the very best. |
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vijikr
United Arab Emirates
413 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2009 : 11:48:22 AM
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Hi Stoat,
Welcome to woo woo land.
Love and Light
Viji |
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stoat
USA
12 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2009 : 4:10:00 PM
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Thanks one and all. It helps to know that all of you are out there.
S. |
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JDas
USA
74 Posts |
Posted - Nov 04 2009 : 05:13:26 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by stoat
Thanks one and all. It helps to know that all of you are out there.
S.
We're here. You posting your story gives me another backdrop to reflect on mine, a ripple is created. Wow, we are so different in our interaction with 'this thing'!! Amazing! Woo woo! |
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stoat
USA
12 Posts |
Posted - Nov 04 2009 : 8:35:06 PM
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Hello again. I guess I sound like a prize dilettante -- at least I do to myself as I reread my posts (never a good idea, I suspect).
I'm reporting on 2 distinct eras of my life. The first entailed intense spiritual practice with a (slightly deluded) guru. When I graduated myself (and others) from this, I felt as though I was being directed to focus on the nuts and bolts of life -- trying to live what I'd learned. Twenty years later, I feel I have integrated things and live in a manner that's consistent with what I know and feel (for the most part). But there are numerous, artifact siddhis, which I've already written about. The recent insight for me is that perhaps another new era might open up, which would entail a more explicit focus on Spirit again.
Once again, thanks for your attention.
s. |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 05 2009 : 07:12:20 AM
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Yes, welcome Stoat. You will find in Yogani's books he writes about "stillness in action".
This is the very important concept of taking what we have gained from meditation, such as our inner silence, and applying it to everyday life. It not only benefits the rest of humanity, but also balances and grounds us. |
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Introducing myself.
