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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 1:39:32 PM
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Namaste Friends,
Not sure if this is the correct section of the forum to post this thread in so please feel free to relocate it Moderators.
Lately I have been doing a lot of self inquiry work, mostly centred around my addiction to marijuana (which has been amply discussed on the forum and will not be discussed here). I have come to realize that my addiction stems from an attachment I have to being comfortable. Comfortable in my environment, comfortable in my mind, and comfortable in my own skin. Anyone have any suggestions as to how one could go about breaking the attachment to being comfortable? (other then the obvious, which is to keep up with my practices) I am hoping that since I am having such a difficult time ending this addiction, that if I take a different (side) approach, maybe I can wipe it out without too much trauma. Oops, there I go again....addicted to comfort
Love,
Carson |
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tadeas
Czech Republic
314 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 3:19:41 PM
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A relevant quote I've read somewhere: "the first impulse to discomfort is to seek comfort".
Personally I think it will go away by itself as you progress and go through the various stages of witnessing (discrimination, dispassion). This way, you'll be able to dissolve the habit. The more you are in the witness, the easier it is to not go with the programmed behavior.
Obviously it's good to be aware of what is happening at any given moment, to watch the urge to get comfortable, or uncomfortable. Ask who is it that is uncomfortable, or comfortable? Who is it that is attached to being comfortable? This only works to the degree your inner silence is present, though.
If you decide to create situations of comfort or discomfort on purpose, you could do the same thing - watch the whole scene, see what changes and what does not change and how identified perception is created. |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 3:28:38 PM
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OK....Let me rephrase then....
"How can one learn to feel comfortable within an uncomfortable situation/environment without changing it?"
Love,
Carson
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tadeas
Czech Republic
314 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 3:37:12 PM
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| To not identify with anything particular in the situation (a "me", body, feelings, emotions) - witness it. This allows you to reprogram yourself. It also allows you to see the truth in the situation which is that it is itself completely empty, transparent and free of identification. |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 3:41:56 PM
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I can understand this with my mind, but not with my "Self". I understand the idea behind this, but have a hard time putting it into action in regards to my marijuana usage. I have been able to eliminate nearly all "suffering" from my life, but just can't seem to beat the few things that still trigger a need to smoke in me. Things like being physically uncomfortable.
Love,
Carson
P.S. Thanks for your advice. |
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tadeas
Czech Republic
314 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 3:58:49 PM
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Yeah, that's because this self-inquiry is a function of your overall purification. So it's more like allowing your habits and thinking process to arrange themselves according to the current condition of your nervous system. It's important to let go wherever you can and just give in to the process. Everything you do is based on that.
If anyone has some methods, share them :) |
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emc
2072 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 3:59:10 PM
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I totally recognize it, Carson.
What I do, is that I just decide to dare to take a risk. I KNOW that the uncomfortable stuff itself is not what I'm avoiding when I'm seeking comfort. It's the FEAR I've built around the uncomfortable situation.
The resistance is in overcoming that fear to face the uncomfortable thing (whatever it may be). For example, I fear to feel pain. There's a lot of assumptions/memories around what it is to have pain and they create fear. I'd rather not go into that fear, so it builds up more and more. There's a fear monster there. When I dare to take the risk, I face that monster and go through the fear to reach and feel the pain... and then... the physical pain is not uncomfortable at all! It was the fear around it that was uncomfortable, but I didn't see that. Pain is more interesting when seen for what it is.
A metaphore I use sometimes is going towards the steep. We walk towards the edge and build up an enormous fear that the fall will be sooo terrifying. Yet, we decide to take the risk and jump, close our eyes and just go over the edge... and *thump* we land 2 decimeters below, because there was no steep... and we are very surprised! 
Even though I've jumped several times, it seems like the next time is always as scary the first time. No learning curve here.  |
Edited by - emc on Dec 08 2008 4:03:47 PM |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 4:14:59 PM
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Thanks for the advice tadeas, emc....
Sometimes I feel like such a baby!! Many times in my life I have found that I have had a great deal of pride in my ability to withstand large doses of pain, yet when some "things" rise up in me I end up cowering like a whimpering child. I can tattoo my armpits but trying to manage to not smoke a joint after eating, is too painful? Ummm.....something is wrong here. And yeah I agree emc....no learning curve here....It's like smoking Salvia...No matter how many times you do it, and sometimes even the MORE you do it, the harder it can be to prepare yourself for that next "jump".
Love,
Carson |
Edited by - CarsonZi on Dec 08 2008 4:48:46 PM |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 4:30:06 PM
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Hi Carson,
Are you following any specific self inquiry technique?
I would like to recommend two books.. one I may have mentioned before.. Loving What Is by Byron Katie. It is a great way to start self inquiry.. cuts to the heart of the problems. And at first the results maybe slightly ego driven.. but as you do this over and over again.. with every little thing in your life.. stories have very little room to hide.. and you will be amazed at how honest you get with yourself.. and in turn others.. and how light you will feel.
There is another book I have been meaning to suggest to you.. it's called Real Love by Greg Baer. Greg himself was an opiate addict, very close to taking his own life.. and is the founder of Real Love. This book shows you how you unconsciously have a getting and protecting behaviour. I remember reading a part of the book.. and wanting to close it and put it away, because it was so true and my ego hated it. Many of the people who have read this book have said.. "its like he knew me when he wrote this book".
quote:
http://www.streetdirectory.com/trav...diction.html
Another approach to the cause of drug addiction is presented by Dr. Greg Baer, a former ophthalmologist, who asserts that the primary cause of addiction is a response to pain, emptiness and the lack of what he calls real love. He does not ascribe to the theory that addiction is a disease. "After extensive interviews with thousands of addicts," says Dr. Baer, "less than one percent of them fail to respond enthusiastically to this definition of addiction and the clarification of the causes of drug addiction, whereas most of them have had serious problems with the usual definitions and explanations."
The reason I am suggesting the books is because, at times it helps to find the root to your problem by yourself.. others can tell you many things that may make sense, but unless you find your own answer, you will not be able to let go that which you think is a problem. At times, what you think is the problem, may not even be close to what is keeping you bound.. and finding your own answer will be that one block in jenga that will make the tower collapse.
PS: BTW "Real Love" and "unconditional love" may have a different meaning after you read his book.. so even if you are sure you have real love in your life, read the book.. and may be your wife will enjoy it too... it is one of the most spiritual non-spiritual books I have read. |
Edited by - Shanti on Dec 08 2008 4:37:59 PM |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 4:47:23 PM
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Hi Shanti,
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful suggestions.
The Self Inquiry methods I am following are a mixture of Adya's and AYP's Self Inquiry methods (although I did not realize this until recently, after reading Yogani's Self Inquiry book). This is a method I have been following for most of my life and comes very naturally to me. It basically involves dialectic conversation with myself in a way in which I cannot lie to myself. I don't lie to myself consciously as it is, but this method makes it impossible to lie to myself sub-consiously either. This method came to me as a result of an accidental overdose of 2C-E (thinking it was 2C-C). It was probably the most emotionally painful experience of my life, yet by far the most beneficial 12 hours as well. I have read much on Byron Katie's "Loving What Is" from you and others who swear by it on the forum, but I had not heard of the Greg Baer book. As soon as Christmas is over and I can find some extra cash again I promise I will pick them both up. The quote from Baer really hit's home to me as well and I would highly doubt I am one of the 1% that doesn't resonate with his defintions of addiction. A lack of supportive and unconditional love from my family I am sure has much to do with my subconscious need to get high all day long to shy away from the pain.
Again, thank you for your insightful reply, I look forward to reading these books.
Love,
Carson |
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 4:57:27 PM
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Hi Carson:
i'm not an expert on how to stop drugs, but i think that marijuana is smthg which is psychologicaly addicting more than physical and thk god you passed the phisycaly addicting drugs.
the best suggestion i can tell you is, try and cut it bits by bits lower your intake of it gradualy.
instead of smoking a whole joint smoke half of it... then try and skip some of the times which you used to smoke at.
there will be emotional frustration and feelings of being uncomfortable due to it that's true but they wont harm your healthg they are emotional more than they are physical and handeling them will make you stronger and when you get it the habbit you'll feel more free and relieved than ever.
now during that clunky stage, the best advice that comes to my head is to eat and drink stuff that can calm you down but in moderation of course like lettuce and milk... plus point your frustration toward your personal enlightenment.
and if it still feels bad, i suggest running till you get tired and then take a nice bath that will really sooth you down a lot.
i am practicing this second piece of advice myself when my bhakti goes to much over the edge.
cz i don't know why but my practices do not seem to be extinguishing my bhakti but enpowering it till the end that during this last period i added some new practices then had to self pace.
wish you all the best.
kindest regards,
Ananda
p.s: what you do with my advice is entirely up to you and on your own responsibility cz i don't know about your case with drugs and what kind of stuff you are smoking cz sometimes this stuff gets laced with other addictive substances. |
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 5:05:14 PM
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| we cross posted Shanti, your advice is great go for it Carson |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 5:11:31 PM
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Thanks Ananda for the thoughtful suggestions.
You are right in that this particular addiction of mine is basically psychic and not physical. It is slightly physical as I still have stomach issues without using it, but I am working on that in other non-mental ways. But the fact that it is a mental addiction makes it harder for me to cut out. It is my brain that is the culprit. It is mental turmoil (for lack of a better term) that triggers my intense need to smoke dope. So I am trying to figure a way around the mental turmoil so I don't need to smoke anymore. But I don't feel like I am in control of this anymore. It's like when I "need" to smoke, I go into "witness" state, and just allow it to happen. Not enough mental desire to stop I guess. But then I am here writing on the forum for advice because I DO actually want to stop. Inner turmoil. One side fighting the other.
And don't worry about my ganja being laced. Personally I think the idea of lacing pot with something is absurd. First, most people say it is laced with coke. You can't smoke coke and get high. The combustion temp for coke is too low. You physically can't get high smoking cocaine. (this is why crack/free base was invented) So noone laces weed with coke. Some people think it can be laced with methaphetamine. Again not possible. As you can't "smoke" meth either. You can't touch flame to meth or it burns. This is why people are seen smoking it in a glass tube and not touching the flame directly to the glass. Some people say weed can be laced with PCP. I laugh. People don't give PCP away for free, too hard to come by, and believe me, if your weed was laced with it, you would know! So no worries Bro, my weed is clean. And actually organic too. Hydro with no fertalizers.
Love,
Carson |
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2008 : 6:25:33 PM
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thk you for the info my friend , i tried weed and hash in the past more than once but haven't fallen in love with them.
it was fun but not that much, i find yoga and spiritual practices to be more satisfying and more deep and profound plus fun.
hope you'll get that experience from yoga, and soon you'll do that's a definite if you are practicing and that will lead into the desintegration of bad habbits like smoking weed a lot.
btw i live in lebanon, we export this stuff to other countries by the tonzzz.
up in the mounains if you're camping or going to hunt, you might stumble into fields of weed... it happened with me twice hehehe (quite a site)
but most of the people here like to smoke hash i think it's more popular around the country.
light and love,
Ananda |
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Attachment to Comfort
