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shakti411
USA
1 Posts |
 Posted - May 24 2008 : 2:04:59 PM
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Dear Yogani,
I apologize to all for possibly posting in the wrong place, but I can't figure out how to write a question to Yogani. When I do, it says I do not have enough posts.
I would like to suggest a "Yoga and Aging" topic in FAQs, or some other obvious place. I have a question and have not been able to locate an answer. There are many, many of us boomers out there and I feel we are being pretty much neglected in this American culture. EVERYTHING seems geared for the young.
I am a 57-yr-old female. I'm single and live entirely alone. I work full time. I no longer have much sexual energy. Hormones help, but there are terrible side effects, so I may quit them. I am just getting started with your program and after 2 wks of spinal breathing and "i am" meditation, I'm not experiencing anything different. I cannot sit in root because my legs are very short and slightly fat. If I sit on my ankles with both knees together, then one heel can go on the perineum, but this is extremely uncomfortable and might be much too distracting. I wasn't able to sit long enough in it to try meditating.
I do not get much sleep because of hot flashes and having to urinate so often. So I'm having difficulty with energy and staying awake during my meditation. I'm really struggling with the onset of old age! To tell you the truth, it's depressing and I hate it! My body is not the same anymore.
I have an extensive background with "enlightenment intensives" (can be found at www.sandoth.com). I have experienced that profound bliss--the first time it lasted an entire month! When I just sit, dive in deeply, and do what I call "listen for God," I begin to have heart openings and some bliss at unexpected moments throughout my day. But I'm distracted by the mantra when doing your program. Possibly I just need to give it more time?
I also have an extensive background with Iyengar-style Hatha yoga. Nowdays, I just do two sun salutations a day first thing in the morning.
What suggestions do you have for aging participants like me? I'm worried that I do not have enough sexual energy to make progress, now that I'm getting started so late. I have many of your books and have read them all, including Secrets of Wilder most recently.
Thank you so much for your work! I greatly appreciate who you are and what you provide.
shakti411 |
Edited by - shakti411 on May 24 2008 2:08:03 PM |
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yogani
USA
5242 Posts |
Posted - May 24 2008 : 4:05:10 PM
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Hi Shakti, and welcome to the forums!
Well, none of us are getting any younger, and I have a few years on you, so don't feel too old. 
Active libido is not a prerequisite for progress on the path. Inner silence is much more important, and age is not a restriction on that.
Sex and spirituality are strange bed-fellows. On one extreme we have practitioners trying to kill off libido, and on the other extreme those who want it retained in full force forever. "Energy work" (at all ages) is largely viewed in that sort of love/hate way too. The truth is, if we have neurobiological energy (and we all do) we can use it in natural ways for cultivating ecstatic conductivity and radiance. That is why we have spinal breathing pranayama, asanas, mudras, bandhas, tantric methods, etc. But the core of the journey is really beyond all that, in stillness.
Who is concerned about cultivating inner silence? That is really the key, and it does not depend primarily on energy cultivation. It is great that you are meditating daily. The procedure of deep meditation as covered in the AYP writings will take care of any distractions. Just easily favor the mantra when you realize you are off it. It will become finer with more abiding stillness being present over time. A "clunky stage" with the mantra in the beginning is pretty normal. It will smooth out as your nervous system purifies and opens.
The suggestion is to take it easy, not try and do too many practices (self-pace for progress with comfort), and enjoy!
The guru is in you.
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voluchi
USA
6 Posts |
Posted - May 24 2008 : 4:08:36 PM
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| I have had similar issue (hot-flashes) with my wife 12 yrs back. She was very touchy and emotional. You need to have some one to be with. Hug and hold hands. My wife had about 3 to 6 mos of unsettled time then on slowny back to normal. I can assure you everything will be fine with you soon. Just trust Shiva. As for meditation I use my sofa or sometimes my bed with high pillows. Any posture that is comfortable and can allow you to loose awareness of your body is good. |
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mikkiji
USA
219 Posts |
Posted - May 24 2008 : 5:13:18 PM
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Before my wife died last year, and for several year prior, we naturally dealt with the hot flashes. She took the hormones but was afraid of the side effects, and tried lots of soy--that actually DID help, as it has my fiancé as well. I'm only a year younger than you are, shakti--and as for libido, that comes with with right partner in my experience--when you have him (OR her--I do not know what you sexual orientation is!) with you, then it will be there for you both. When my wife was sick and dying, and later, after her death when I was alone, my libido also seemed to evaporate. When I met my current fiancé, although it took a few tries, eventually we were fine--better (MUCH better!!!) than fine, if you have read any of my recent posts! Give your AYP practices more time--and I think don't worry at first how you are sitting--just be comfortable at first, sit however meditation feels most natural. Later, you can add.
Michael |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 25 2008 : 12:30:17 AM
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I heard that it helps with menopause if you eat a diet with little or no animal products.
Also make sure you are doing some sort of exercise that is strenuous (makes you breathe hard) at least three times a week. That's just general advice for everyone, especially people our age. |
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riptiz
United Kingdom
741 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 03:51:34 AM
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Hi Shakti,
My wife uses a natural herb product called Confiance for hot flashes and is much improved. I'm sure they will sell it in the USA.
L&L
Dave |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 10:52:15 AM
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john C wrote: quote:
"On the subject of enlightenment, I suspect this is the emperors new cloths. In other words, an unobtainable goal,a commonly accepted mythology, and needless to say, highly over-rated. Just be a human being fully. Just become that."
I agree about just being, and what the unenlightened imagines enlightenment to be is fictional. However, the actual word "enlightenment" is exactly what I have experienced over the years, in that my burden, the weight of the world has become lighter and lighter.
In other words as I learn to become a human being fully and drop all the misconceptions about what is necessary to do that, I discover that just being is quite easy and light-feeling. |
Edited by - Etherfish on May 26 2008 10:53:04 AM |
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yogibear
409 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 08:40:26 AM
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Hi Shakti411,
Welcome to the forum.
Traditionally, the four stages of life in India are getting an education, finding a marriage partner and starting a family, earning a living and last but not least, attaining enlightenment. Maybe that is the real reason why they are called the golden years. And I know that basic order applied to me and most other people without saying it and ever purposely trying to arrange life that way. So it sounds like you are right on schedule and have alot company, self included.
Btw, sitting in a chair for meditation is legal. Even tho I can sit comfortably in the half lotus on the floor, right now I am using a chair for meditation as I like the way it tugs on my pelvic floor.
Most people eat too much grain and sugar and after years and decades of doing this wind up with diabetes, heart disease, etc., and other less dangerous but pesky health problems that are amplified by this.
I don't know if this applies to you or not.
But it does sounds like you could gradually build up your exercise level alot more.
It is amazing the response of the body when a person moves even just a little bit in the direction of the lifestyle for which our bodies are genetically programmed. I.e., diet and exercise.
Good luck and best wishes, yb. |
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markern
Norway
171 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 11:57:57 AM
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I would presume practicing a bit of semen retention would boost the sexdrive. So would excercising the PC muscle and anal muscle. In a book by mantak chia about sexual reflexology or something, he describes numerous excersizes for sexual health. Some of these concern certain types of massage of penis and testicles and other genital training. Amonsgt other things these are suposed to increase sensitivuty, increase bloodflow in the area and increase libido.
I presume there are certain asanas and pranayamas that also help libido, possibly accupuncture, diet and herbs as well. There is a women that has created something wich I think she calls the orgasmic diet. It is well reputed and she is well aquainted with yoga and eastern aproaches to diet. Check it out.
Also the people that use the Aneros prostate massager always seem to get an increase in libido from that.
I have also heard Tantra people say numerous times the if you do slow ritual tantric sex your sex drive comes after a little while even though you are not in the mood at all. Check out tantra.com and other tantra sites. |
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Yogajan
USA
49 Posts |
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mikkiji
USA
219 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 3:34:39 PM
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It amuses me to hear of such worry regarding loss of sex drive and sexual performance as one ages and the body declines. I can't (or won't...?) speak about "Enlightenment", but I have been doing my TM meditation for 35 years, as well as the TM Sidhis, and up until 20 years ago, asanas and pranayama. I sit comfortably during my meditation but not in even half lotus, and have not been a vegetarian for over 20 years. I have had Type 1 (Juvenile childhood onset) diabetes for 42 years, and had a heart attack and a triple coronary by-pass 7 years ago. I lost my wife of 33 years to cancer a year ago. I work in a job (teaching emotionally disturbed adolescents) which burns out young people in their 20s within 18 months--I have been doing it for 29 years, and my young colleagues, many of whom are younger than my own daughter, cannot keep up with me. Maybe it's balance rather than energy, but the work I do nourishes my spirit rather than draining it. I take almost no days off for any reason ever, and unlike most school teachers, our school goes 12 months with no summer break. I do stay physically fit and I do eat sensibly, but mostly I live a very ordinary life--excepting for the years I spent in an ashram training with my guru as a young adult and the 35 years of meditation practices, I am no different than any average suburban guy in his mid-50s.
I have reached this center of Self (or whatever), a stable spot where I live--that is as concretely as I can describe it--a place where things don't much bother me deep down, where I'm peaceful and happy, where I feel connected to god and the entire universe--inside my soul, or something like that. From that inner space of silent Self, my energy and creativity seem unbounded--including sexual, or perhaps more accurately, ESPECIALLY sexual energy and desire. Part of it has to do with brushing away the shadowy remnants of the ego, that false self which is so insecure and unconfident. Once that pesky illusion is no longer in charge, the true inner Self of the spirit runs the show--and from there, all possibilities arise. I have arrived at a place of sexual bliss with my partner which involves that inner spirit--in fact, which relies on it to bring mind, body, heart and soul into perfect harmonic balance. Once this space is tapped into, sexual activity can continue for an indefinite period of time and result in an unbounded state of continuous bliss, which brings the entire awareness more in tune with Reality. I believe that this stage of life--my "Golden Years"--is exactly because of my age and experience, that I (or any young person) could not achieve it without many years of practice, plus the patience which comes from age, and the perspective which arrives through living a long full life. This is the gravy, the frosting on the cake, the payoff for decades of devotion and service. I'm pleased to be enjoying it, and I'd like to report back that youth is NOT wasted on the young, and from this side of the mountain, life is very very good.
Jai Guru Dev,
Michael |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 3:49:13 PM
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Thanks for sharing, Michael
Your posts are a joy to read
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yogibear
409 Posts |
Posted - May 28 2008 : 08:21:17 AM
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Hi Micheal,
It looks like you are established in your essential nature and reaping the rewards of a life well lived. Congratulations!
More power to you, yb. |
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Loss of libido due to aging
