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Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
 Posted - Oct 24 2007 : 11:29:25 AM
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Wow. Now that was weird.
Over the past three years or so of AYP meditation, there've been perhaps 11 minutes, total, when I absolutely didn't try to own or control the mantra, and truly let the Cosmic Barber cut my hair. Maybe a little more than that, but it's rare fer sure (and there are gradations of letting, anyway, though it's logically irrational). And those 11 (or whatever) minutes were where the vast majority of the purification took place, I'm intuitively certain.
Anyhow.....in this morning's meditation, I experienced that - the mantra meditating me, rather than the reverse. And as it scurried around, doing as much hasty work as it could before ego started resisting again, for the first time I felt the mantra enter my brain. Or maybe I should say the area of my head beneath my crown but above the sinuses and ears.
It was a whole different thing. The closest analogy I can find is someone who's spent all day in a hot tub with one hand out of the water (holding a book or a glass or the ledge of the tub) who then plunges his hand into the hot water and suddenly becomes accutely aware of how cold and dry and outside it all the hand had actually been all that time. That was my, um, brain. 
Here's what I (again intuitively) believe happened: as part of my caution in never "going to crown" in any way (i.e. keeping my attention away from that spot), I'd been suppressing attention/action ANYWHERE in the top of my head. This wasn't intentional. I am actually well aware that crown is the tippy top (and above the actual lid). But my mental "defense zone" had, unaware to me, spread lower and lower.
I kept up sambhavi mudra just to be sure this action didn't rush straight up, but as that "hand" warmed up in the hot water, so to speak, it was a WHOLE OTHER THING. I feel...different.
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Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Oct 24 2007 1:32:15 PM |
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Mantra Overrides Overzealous Defense of Crown
