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Fran
United Kingdom
20 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 08 2007 : 03:22:30 AM
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Hello all,
Since I had full on Kundalini experiences I in some way feel I died. It was like I entered a complete emptiness which in someways felt ultimately liberating and expansive, but also void-like and strangely inhuman. It took a while to put my life back together as a relationship disintegrated as a result of my capacity to feel 'human' love and attachment seeming to evaporate (although we are back together now)and I was trying to enter the world again in this intensely open state having been ill for a long time with chronic fatigue (and after effects of Kundalini although didn't realise this at the time), with also having bouts of depressions…
Yet now things are generally so much better and very good a lot of the time, in fact I often feel deeply grateful for having awaken the energies within me. Yet I still have this sense of having died there, I'm always here and not here at the same time. I'm amazed I manage to come off as 'normal', in fact very functional at times... I keep fearing on some level that I may have damaged myself through frying myself on spiritual experiences. Yet there's also always peace and stillness there as well beneath surface anxiety about this. It's since I read the more difficult stories of people feeling they had been depersonalised/ dehumanised through the experience (which were my initial readings of peoples' kundalini experiences- one in particular sticks in my mind about someone who ended up on anti-psychotics as a result).. part of me felt this had happened to me to some extent, I identified with it at the time as I felt on an edge myself with fears of insanity and difficult emotions and feeling like I didn’t exist and that my humanness had gone... Yet I also think if I fear it, I make it true, whereas if I accept what is- actually it is a divine blessing (especially now as much of the difficult aspects have gone a lot of the time)... I also know I have beautiful human as well as more spiritual connections with people so I need to remember that and accept what is always. Yet I would like these fear that come up (particularly premenstrually when I particularly feel I am balancing the tightrope of anxiety/ insanity- trust/ stillness) to be relieved... I know I can't go back, but even though in so many ways I am so grateful for this whole unfolding, part of me grieves the old me who could feel more human love, while also feeling I now have a greater capacity for love of all when surrendered to truth and stillness which is not me, but flows through me. I know all this sounds rather paradoxical and contradictory, but that is my experience. Does this resonate with anyone? Any advice/ reassurance?
It feels like if I could let go of this remaining fear of having damaged myself somehow, then I could truly be more free and content with everything.
Many thanks, I’m so grateful to have somewhere I can raise such a fear,
Fran x
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jongler
Israel
12 Posts |
Posted - Mar 08 2007 : 06:07:39 AM
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Hi Fran
I myself had an awakening a few years back and from that experience I can say that you may feeling like there are two Frans - The new one with the new wisdom and the old one : "The familiar old Fran" whose in fact is dead for better or worse , the old one is not here any more.
The opening you felt in my perspective is that some parts of you were "raised from the dead" and start to operate as really living parts, while being "The old you" at those moments you felt "as being pushed a side" like not needed any more and this is the sense of Dying. More to it, your old habits To be attached to the old and any thing that you know led you to feel that way.
Don't be upset because better and good things happened, you now stand on a higher level than you used to and you understand better human (or yourself) emotions and motives and now you can look and observe further into you - into the whole, but remember that it was just a sparkle on the way.
Yours
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AccidentalYogi
21 Posts |
Posted - Mar 08 2007 : 1:50:32 PM
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Honestly I've found myself feeling very much like you described in terms of not being able to feel "Human Love". For some time I thought myself incapable of it altogether. I think what I've learned is that what I often mistook for human "love" was actually human attachment. It's the difference of loving people because it makes you feel good and loving for the sake of love itself.
I sometimes lament over the person I used to be. I would say I've "died" many times in this lifetime alone, let alone others. If you put the person I was two years ago next to the person I am today you wouldn't even recognize him, physically or mentally.
I often feel like the person I was was better and happier, but that is completely untrue. I was just much more resigned to suffering. The love I thought was so much greater is only so memorable because it contrasted so greatly from the general darkness I was immersed in.
As far as the fear that you've damaged yourself. It's fear. It arises in the mind and does little of benefit. Maybe you have damaged yourself, but all you can really do is try to heal.
The more you talk about this fear and consider it, the more real it becomes. It's simply a thought, the form some energy movement in your body takes translated by the mind.
There is really only one way to conquer that fear, probably the most difficult thing you could ask someone to do. Let it go. It's just another way of clinging to the past, to the person you were before your eyes were opened.
Eventually it will fade away anyway. You'll forget about that fear as you plunge into the possibilities that this new self has brought with it.
All the best
Namaste
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Balance
USA
967 Posts |
Posted - Mar 08 2007 : 2:07:58 PM
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Thank you all for sharing your experiences and insights, they are rich.
Alan |
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Fran
United Kingdom
20 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 07:41:51 AM
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thank you! Useful words to soothe me further. I am aware I just need to let go of the fear- indeed I feel even merely writing the post helped me to do so.
'I often feel like the person I was was better and happier, but that is completely untrue. I was just much more resigned to suffering. The love I thought was so much greater is only so memorable because it contrasted so greatly from the general darkness I was immersed in.'
This resonates with how I feel. I am also glad to have found inkling's of 'human love' coming back, when thinking I could never 'love' again, yet I also agree that a lot of the 'love' I felt before was merely attachement to pleasant feelings around the person I was 'in love' with.
I'm really so glad to have had somewhere to have voiced such concerns, to help me let go of them as fears and old attachments.... |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 10:28:09 AM
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Hi Fran,
Sorry to hear about the hard times you are going through. The good news (if I can call it that) is that it is a phase and it will soon be over. Not only is it a purification phase, it is also an adjustment phase for you and all around you. You have lifetimes of social conditioning , that are slowly breaking down.. and the thought patterns that seemed normal, seem a little meaningless now.. So you are confused and the normal reaction is to resist it and be scared and confused. However, you will slowly adjust to it and it will not be so hard anymore.
You will feel love again.. but it will be at a very different level.. something that is so much stronger and deeper than anything you have experienced before. The trick is to just let go.. to stop resisting the changes (easier said than done.. I know.. been there done that.. many times.. if you look up some of my old posts you will see how much I have complained at this forum.. ). The advice given to me by people in this thread Situation... and here may help you too.
You did say that you feel a touch of depression.. Not sure if you have a tendency to get depressed or if this is something new for you.. if it's something new.. and just a phase thingy, don't worry.. it will go away.. just keep yourself busy all day.. don't get sucked into this feeling, don't dwell in it, don't feed it and give it a "life"... I used to get into real bad depressions in the past. This post by Jim http://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic....hpage=2#5938 helped me get over this tendency.. it's not that I am over depression.. but it does not have a hold on me as it used to any more. Read it and see if it can help you.
And do keep talking to us here, that always helps. To have a place where you can speak your mind and others understand what you are saying, (because many if not all have gone through similar experiences) does make the load a lot lighter. Wish you happiness  and many new openings (that are easy and self paced )... |
Edited by - Shanti on Mar 09 2007 10:34:48 AM |
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david_obsidian
USA
2602 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 11:16:29 AM
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Fran, I have undergone changes over the years that are similar to yours in some way. They did not occur in the context of 'kundalini' in my case, but more in the context of what is called 'samadhi'. But some of the results were similar for me -- the entry of a state that is void-like and strangely inhuman.
If it is any comfort to you, you only feel these states to be 'inhuman' because they are different to what you have known, or remember, to be human before. The potential to experience life as undifferentiated consciousness was always there. Part of you was always the Original Void, and always will be. It was always there, between your thoughts.
Are you That, or are you a needy Animal? The truth is, you are both. Once you were experiencing life only as a needy Animal; now you experience it as the Original Void, and as a needy Animal. You are both, so now you MUST live as both. You have no choice. You have awakened and you can no longer go living as only one of the two.
You must just take care of your Animal life, pragmatically. Regarding depression, it is actually possible in these states to erroneously neglect your Animal needs. This has happened to me. For example, as a result of what happened, I no longer get lonely. Loneliness as such is something I only remember but no longer experience. However, if I don't live a balanced life with the right amount of social activity, whereas I don't get lonely in any way I can detect, I do get depressed -- very slowly, but very surely. That's a case of living too much as the Void and not enough as a needy Animal. It took me a long time to diagnose that one.
When you are 'afraid of the void', you are actually just experiencing Animal fears. Animals only fear not having their needs met -- nothing more. Your Void side isn't afraid of the Void -- and your Animal side isn't actually afraid of the Void itself, rather, your Animal side is only afraid of not having its needs met. The void, no more than space itself, cannot be alone -- no more than water can be thirsty. Every point in it is in total contact with every other.
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Doc
USA
394 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 12:16:32 PM
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Hi Fran:
Perhaps some of this material will resonate with your experiences, and be of interest and help to you. At the very least, hopefully, it will be one more validation that you are not alone in experiencing 'agony and ecstacy' along the path to spiritual illumination.
Dark Night of the Soul is a term used to describe a specific phase in a person's spiritual life. It is used as a metaphor to describe the experience of loneliness and desolation that can occur during spiritual growth.
The "dark night" could generally be described as a letting go of our ego's hold on the psyche, making room for change that can bring about a complete transformation of a person's way of defining his/her self and their relationship to God. The interim period can be frightening, hence the perceived "darkness".
Rather than being a negative event, the dark night is believed by mystics and others to be a blessing in disguise. The Dark Night comes in two phases: a first "Night of the Senses," and a second "Night of the Spirit."
Stanzas Of The Soul
1. One dark night,
fired with love's urgent longings
- ah, the sheer grace! -
I went out unseen,
my house being now all stilled.
2. In darkness, and secure,
by the secret ladder, disguised,
- ah, the sheer grace! -
in darkness and concealment,
my house being now all stilled.
3. On that glad night,
in secret, for no one saw me,
nor did I look at anything,
with no other light or guide
than the one that burned in my heart.
"This night, which as we say is contemplation, causes two kinds of darkness or purgation in spiritual persons according to the two parts of the soul, the sensory and the spiritual. Hence one night of purgation is sensory, by which the senses are purged and accommodated to the spirit; and the other night or purgation is spiritual, by which the spirit is purged and denuded as well as accommodated and prepared for union with God through love.
Since the conduct of beginners in the way of God is lowly and not too distant from love of pleasure and of self, God desires to withdraw them from this base manner of loving and lead them on to a higher degree of divine love. And he desires to liberate them from the lowly exercise of the senses and of discursive meditation, by which they go in search of him so inadequately and with so many difficulties, and lead them into the exercise of spirit, in which they become capable of a communion with God that is more abundant and more free of imperfections.
God does this after beginners have exercised themselves for a time in the way of virtue and have persevered in meditation and prayer. For it is through the delight and satisfaction they experience in prayer that they have become detached from worldly things and have gained some spiritual strength in God. This strength has helped them somewhat to restrain their appetites for creatures, and through it they will be able to suffer a little oppression and dryness without turning back.
Consequently, it is at the time they are going about their spiritual exercises with delight and satisfaction, when in their opinion the sun of divine favor is shining most brightly on them, that God darkens all this light and closes the door and the spring of sweet spiritual water they were tasting as often and as long as they desired.
God now leaves them in such darkness that they do not know which way to turn in their discursive imaginings. They cannot advance a step in meditation, as they used to, now that the interior sense faculties are engulfed in this night. He leaves them in such dryness that they not only fail to receive satisfaction and pleasure from their spiritual exercises and works, as they formerly did, but also find these exercises distasteful and bitter.
When God sees that they have grown a little, he weans them from the sweet breast so that they might be strengthened, lays aside their swaddling bands, and puts them down from his arms that they may grow accustomed to walking by themselves. This change is a surprise to them because everything seems to be functioning in reverse.
This usually happens to recollected beginners sooner than to others since they are freer from occasions of backsliding and more quickly reform their appetites for worldly things. A reform of the appetites is the requirement for entering the happy night of the senses. Not much time ordinarily passes after the initial stages of their spiritual life before beginners start to enter this night of sense. And the majority of them do enter it because it is common to see them suffer these aridities.
When this house of the senses was stilled (that is, mortified), its passions quenched, and its appetites calmed and put to sleep through this happy night of the purgation of the senses, the soul went out in order to begin its journey along the road of the spirit, which is that of proficients and which by another terminology is referred to as the illuminative way or the way of infused contemplation."
by St. John of the Cross
I hope this helps a bit!
Doc
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Edited by - Doc on Mar 09 2007 3:53:49 PM |
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Jim and His Karma
2111 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 12:18:33 PM
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When people see into what the Buddhists call sunyata (translated as "emptiness"), the first reaction (depending on one's temperment and the depth of that particular opening) is often exactly as you describe. No "me" seems like an utter void. Nihilism. Frosty nothing. If this is what it all is, then why bother? What's the use?
That's a function of not having seen the full truth. The full truth is, yep, no "you". But the fabric of this monumental emptiness is pure shimmering love. To quote the detergent commercial, you're SOAKING in it.
Whoever translated the word "sunyata" as "emptiness" in the first place had the same partial view problem. So-called "emptiness" is full, and it's sublime.
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Edited by - Jim and His Karma on Mar 09 2007 12:47:05 PM |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 12:23:34 PM
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| Thanks Doc.. that sure helped me... |
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Doc
USA
394 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 3:02:02 PM
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My pleasure, Shanti!  Glad you found something of value in it. 
Light to All ~
Doc |
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weaver
832 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 3:11:00 PM
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| Thank you Doc for this description of the Night of the Senses and the Night of the Spirit. I think it was mostly Saint John of the Cross who described these in his works. I'm a little surprised that these stages have not been described by teachers and masters of Yoga, and if they have, in some form, I would be interested in what terms have been used in Eastern teachings. |
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Doc
USA
394 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 3:52:15 PM
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Here's a brief excerpt from 'Victory in the Unseen Warfare':
"You must learn that perfection consists in nothing but coming near to God and union with Him, as was said in the beginning. With this is connected a heartfelt realization of the goodness and greatness of God, together with the consciousness of our own nothingness and our proneness to every evil .... This is the law of love, inscribed by the finger of God Himself in the hearts of His true servants ! This is the renunciation of ourselves that God demands of us! This is the blessed yoke that is Light! This is the submission to God's will!"
"Do you now see what all this means? I presume that you are longing to reach the height of such perfection. Blessed be your zeal! But prepare yourself also for labor, sweat and struggle from your first steps on the path. You must sacrifice everything to God and do only His will. Yet you will meet in yourself as many wills as you have powers and wants. Therefore, to reach your desired aim, it is first of all necessary to stifle your own wills and finally to extinguish and kill them altogether. And in order to succeed in this, you must constantly oppose all evil in yourself and urge yourself towards good. In other words, you must ceaselessly fight against yourself and against everything that panders to your own wills, that incites and supports them. So prepare yourself for this struggle and this warfare and know that the crown--attainment of your desired aim--is given to none except to the valiant among warriors and wrestlers."
"But if this is the hardest of all wars... victory in it is the most glorious of all. If you really desire to be victorious in this unseen warfare, and be rewarded with a crown, you must plant in your heart the following four dispositions and spiritual activities, as it were arming yourself with invisible weapons, the most trustworthy and unconquerable of all, namely:
a)never rely on yourself in anything;
b)bear always in your heart a perfect and all-daring trust in God alone;
c)strive without ceasing; and
d)remain constantly in prayer.
"You must know that progress on the path of spiritual life differs greatly from an ordinary journey on earth. If a traveler stops on his ordinary journey, he loses nothing of the way already covered; but if a traveler on the path of virtue stops in his spiritual progress, he loses much of the virtues previously acquired. In an ordinary journey, the further the traveler proceeds, the more tired he becomes, but on the way of spiritual life the longer a man travels, reaching forth unto those things which are before, the greater the strength and power he acquires for his further progress."
by St. Nikodemos of the Holy Mountain of Athos
http://greece.byzicons.com/images/b...t136_300.jpg
Light to All ~
Doc
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Edited by - Doc on Mar 09 2007 3:56:34 PM |
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Doc
USA
394 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 4:00:13 PM
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Hi Weaver!
Yes, indeed...St. John of the Cross, one of the greatest Western Christian Mystics ever. If you liked the excerpt from 'The Dark Night of the Soul', you may want to check out more of his writing at the following site:
www.carmelite.com/saints/john/works/p.htm
Light to All ~
Doc |
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weaver
832 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 4:47:17 PM
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| Thank you Doc for this link, I will check it out! |
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Doc
USA
394 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2007 : 7:57:48 PM
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Here's a Budhist perspective:
Spiritual Death
This term may be slightly off-putting, but it isn’t meant to suggest physical death. What ‘dies’ are all our illusions and delusions about who we are and how things really are. This is usually spoken of as ‘insight practice’ (vipassana). Insight can be cultivated through a huge range of meditation, mindfulness and awareness practices. All of those already mentioned have insight dimensions.
The first, impermanence, involves contemplating the transitoriness of all composite things.
Then comes contemplation of unsatisfactoriness — reflecting that seeking security or meaning for our life in such transitory things will inevitably lead to being let down and consequent suffering.
Finally, reflection on insubstantiality involves contemplating that there is no ultimately existing, graspable ‘essence’ in anything.
Contemplations such as this can lead to a loosening of the human tendency to grasp onto life, and opening up to the ultimate mystery of our true nature.
Hari OM!
Doc
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Mar 10 2007 : 05:31:34 AM
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Thanks Fran for starting this thread, it is bringing back lots of memories.
My memories are being stirred particularly by Doc's words and links to St John of the Cross and when I read them my heart fills, thanks Doc.
My encounter with spiritual death was one where I was in no doubt whatsoever that I had "died" as such and was "reborn" into something else.
I got the distinct image of me having being in a buhble of logic and analysis, concepts and ideas. The death and rebirth was like bursting out of this bubble into another space, being able to look back and see the futility and pain of trying to figure things out like this. Knowing also that I could re-enter the bubble, live in the world, and come out of it any time I liked.
This all occured after many years of very deep depression and lonliness. The death and rebirth vanquished this in an instant - forever. Every second of the pain was worth it.
I often wonder what would have happend if I had been practicing AYP with its information about crown work and self pacing and all its other attributes.
I wonder if the Dark Night of the Soul is actually the Gopi Krishna type experience in the Christian tradition.
Will the Dark Night of the Soul still occur for someone practicing the AYP system, or will the self regulated safe practice allow the person to avoid the deepest of the pain and allow a smooth transition, from being locked in the dual experience of life to being able to see from both the dual and non-dual?
Louis
P.S. I'm not suggesting that I am in any way evolved in this. My death and rebirth experience was also coupled with the knowledge that I was still basically f---d up and still had all this work to do. The experience was necessary for me to stay living and continue the work.
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Fran
United Kingdom
20 Posts |
Posted - Mar 10 2007 : 09:11:09 AM
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Hi, thanks for all your responses and insights.
Shanti, just to clarify I would not actually consider myself to be having a 'hard time' at the moment (except for short periods of time- usually when have PMT). I feel blessed in so many ways. Also the bouts of depression was a year ago, very little now... I have been adjusting, yet it's been an up and down process, at the moment in many ways I feel the most integrated I have ever felt. Especially having vioced such fears and helping to let them go. I also do know I do love again- it is just a different kind of love now, but is has taken a while to let go of attachment to the old form of 'love' I felt.
David, can you clarify for me the difference between experience of samadhi and kundalini awakening? I like your insight in to the difference between the Original Void and needy Animal. I think on realising the void, it is easy to neglect the animal and feel I have certainly done this at times. Corresponds to needing to be aware of all the chakras e.g. need to be grounded and rooted before raising consciousness to keep it all in balance and to be nuturing all parts of you being.
Doc, great, I have read a little on the Dark Night of the Soul and it does help to understand all I have been through since I started opening myself spiritually, that for so many, it is just part of the path. Thanks also for Buddhist perspective- a Buddhist path is where my roots are- the beginning of my spiritual life.
Jim, like this: 'Whoever translated the word "sunyata" as "emptiness" in the first place had the same partial view problem. So-called "emptiness" is full, and it's sublime. ' I have been experiencing it more as sublime lately, which is much preferable to the less full experience.
Loius, thanks for sharing your experience of spiritual death and rebirth- interesting question about Dark night of the Soul and more self-regulating ways of practicing like the AYP system- any takers?
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david_obsidian
USA
2602 Posts |
Posted - Mar 13 2007 : 11:38:31 AM
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Fran said:
David, can you clarify for me the difference between experience of samadhi and kundalini awakening?
Samadhi and kundalini have this much in common -- that they are events/experiences/phenomena associated with awakening on the yogic path. As experiences though, they are very different, kundalini being associated with rising energy in the spine, and samadhi with a deep silencing of the mind and usually, with spontaneous kumbhak, which is cessation/slowing down of the breath.
No generalization is going to be perfect, but in rough terms you can draw strong contrasts between the two as if they are two different poles of spiritual experience -- you could say that kundalini is very much an energetic body-phenomenon, and samadhi a mind-phenomenon. Kundalini is usually powerful, full, energetic, ecstatic and can be dangerous. Samadhi is powerful but empty, serene, ordered, complete, transcendent and even sober. Their respective energies are sometimes described in the Shakti-Shiva metaphor.
Partly since the state of samadhi is very hard to describe and authenticate, it's often difficult, and fortunately not essential, to find a common language to describe it.
You'll find a good thread on it here, in which Yogani makes a contribution, and also if you are scientifically curious, you can look at some of my analysis of samadhi and speculation about what it is.
I hope that helps.
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VIL
USA
586 Posts |
Posted - Mar 13 2007 : 11:48:41 AM
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quote:
david: Speaking somewhat speculatively, if and when the self-ordering processes, normally limited to sleep, can be activated without the loss of consciousness, a very powerful feedback loop is created which unleashes the body-mind's intelligence, and can start up or accelerate the process of enlightenment. I have a theory that this is what Samadhi actually is; it is the wakeful experience of certain self-ordering process of the mind that are normally confined to sleep. [ However, this does not mean that trying to remain awake while falling asleep is the best, or even a good approach towards Samadhi; regular meditation, done while awake, and the Yogic life in general, are better ones.]
So, in short, our 'awareness of our true nature' is more accessible during sleep because there is a deep conncetion between 'awareness of our true nature' and 'awareness in the presence of our self-ordering nature'; and the latter can happen if we have awareness during certain parts of the sleep cycle.
I hope you don't mind that I quoted you from your other post, david, but I loved this. I can't tell you the amount of articles that have mentioned the dream and spiritual states of consciousness. Baha'u'llah also mentions this.
AUM - awake, dream, deep sleep.
Anyway, Great post. Science/Reality. Again, loved it:
quote:
One of the created phenomena is the dream. Behold how many secrets are deposited therein, how many wisdoms treasured up, how many worlds concealed. Observe, how thou art asleep in a dwelling, and its doors are barred; on a sudden thou findest thyself in a far-off city, which thou enterest without moving thy feet or wearying thy body; without using thine eyes, thou seest; without taxing thine ears, thou hearest; without a tongue, thou speakest. And perchance when ten years are gone, thou wilt witness in the outer world the very things thou hast dreamed tonight.
52
Now there are many wisdoms to ponder in the dream, which none but the people of this Valley can comprehend in their true elements. First, what is this world, where without eye and ear and hand and tongue a man puts all of these to use? Second, how is it that in the outer world thou seest today the effect of a dream, when thou didst vision it in the world of sleep some ten years past? Consider the difference between these two worlds and the mysteries which they conceal, that thou mayest attain to divine confirmations and heavenly discoveries and enter the regions of holiness.
http://bahai-library.com/index.php5...valleys.html
VIL |
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david_obsidian
USA
2602 Posts |
Posted - Mar 13 2007 : 12:21:42 PM
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Thanks for the appreciation, VIL.
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VIL
USA
586 Posts |
Posted - Mar 13 2007 : 12:24:59 PM
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VIL |
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Fran
United Kingdom
20 Posts |
Posted - Mar 13 2007 : 6:26:38 PM
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thanks David for clarifying that for me and for leading me to interesting links related to samadhi and it's possible link to the natural re-ordering process of sleep...
The reason I asked is because for me I feel samadhi experiences came out of Kundalini experiences, and thought perhaps the two could be linked, although not always. Kundalini experiences leading to samadhi experiences and vice versa.
'samadhi with a deep silencing of the mind and usually, with spontaneous kumbhak, which is cessation/slowing down of the breath.'
Which in the end is more what I experienced in meditation.... Not to get too caught up in the terminology, but I wonder if the energy rising leads ultimately to a samadhi like experience. An experience of ones true nature, a deep stilling, an experience of emptiness and a sense of ultimate freedom and connectedness to all... But also leading to difficulties already described, yet no regrets, to experience it is worth all the difficulties, which are only my ego grasping for survival and my individual 'stuff' coming up against this great mystery of spiritual awakening... |
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david_obsidian
USA
2602 Posts |
Posted - Mar 13 2007 : 11:03:43 PM
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Not to get too caught up in the terminology, but I wonder if the energy rising leads ultimately to a samadhi like experience.
Definitely yes, according to what I hear. I have had a little kundalini experience myself so far, but not much.
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Manipura
USA
870 Posts |
Posted - Mar 14 2007 : 12:18:51 AM
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Hi Fran. My experience is that the kundalini energy, once it settles down some, expands samadhi. It's as if all the rising energy slowly starts to move outward. The image of a balloon slowing expanding comes to mind, accompanied by the awareness that there is no 'inside' or 'outside' of the balloon, but a merging of the 2.
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Fran
United Kingdom
20 Posts |
Posted - Mar 16 2007 : 06:44:46 AM
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| Cheers Meg- yes this relates to my experience |
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Kundalini and spiritual death
