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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
 Posted - Feb 03 2021 : 9:32:40 PM
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Om All!
First time posting on here so please be kind; I was just wondering if anyone else has experienced feeling so free from their practice that they became scared? |
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Dogboy
USA
2294 Posts |
Posted - Feb 03 2021 : 9:52:18 PM
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Hello and welcome again!
Can you be more specific about “free” and “scared”? Do you practice AYP? |
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zamolxes
Romania
93 Posts |
Posted - Feb 05 2021 : 5:47:25 PM
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Hello Yogabuzz,
In one of the lessons Yogani explains this event as putting a frog in boiling water, of course the frog will jump out of it. But if the frog is put in cold water, and then the water is warmed until it boils then the frog will stay there.
The frog is the ego mind, and the water is inner silence.
During the time I practiced meditation, there were experiences like the one you described, as if free falling into an abyss. And although I didn't get scared, I felt like losing my grip. It can happen because of bahkti or just because of the process of purification. It's not something you should be too concerned about.
Perhaps you should try to pace your desire and the practice itself. Since meditation is a practice in which we let go, many times we let go of our sense of self, and at an early stage this induces fear or shock.
I hope you don't get discouraged, and slowly approach the practices one step at a time. Perhaps try the breathing meditation if you are scared, or if you like the sense of freedom now that you have experienced it, just keep in mind the object of meditation, so as to keep hold of something.
Best wishes
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Feb 06 2021 : 1:56:12 PM
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Om and thank you Dogboy and Zamolxes for your replies.
(Busted! Thank you for the correction Dogboy, I should have said it's my first time 'starting' a post... xxx)
By free, I mean being a witness as you become a vessel, my teacher would say that it was Shakti doing gods work.
By scared, I mean doubting (questioning) everything.
I think I just want to talk to someone about what happened... |
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Feb 06 2021 : 3:11:42 PM
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I don't really know where to begin, I think I just need to talk about what happened, but what I do know is that my fear is stopping my evolution (practice resuming).
I've been practicing many branches of yoga since the turn of the millennium so ~20 years (on and off). I found AYP (or it found me) a short while before undertaking my teacher training; I 'have' practiced AYP but, I've had a sadhana holiday (i.e. I've not been practicing for awhile).
I am knowing that it's time for me to return to my sadhana, but my fear is preventing me, hence why I am speaking now, because if I don't change something nothing will change.
So I went though (what I would consider) quite an extreme awakening... about a year into my teacher training which I started in 2015, so I was a seasoned yogi with ~15 years under my belt, so not a newbie nor spiritually naive...
A lot of things happened simultaneously, both internally and externally, life experience accelerated exponentially, I was used to the inturnal raising and digesting of karma, what (apparently) I wasn't ready for was the outer manifestation of what was happening on the inside, I kept the faith and trusted that everything that was happening was exactly what needed to happen in order for me to grow into freedom, basically, separation disappeared, my meditation became permanent, the inner and outer became one, which again was digestible... |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Feb 07 2021 : 01:05:46 AM
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I felt being “too free” is when I lose personal preference. A feeling of no gravity, no Will, nothing to do that is not already done. I found that disturbing and try to peddle back into ego-zone.
Sey  |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Feb 07 2021 : 03:54:19 AM
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Hello Yogabuzz108
Good explanation from Sey
Also check this out from lesson 329
quote:
If experiences overwhelm us to the point where we become fearful that we may be losing control of our life, then it can be helpful to stay engaged in life, particularly in activities that are grounding. These are physical activities, and activities that are about helping others. At the same time we can temporarily reduce the kinds of activities that stimulate spiritual energy flows, such as attending spiritual gatherings and too much spiritual practice
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Feb 12 2021 : 9:05:20 PM
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| Om and thank you All for your replies, I apologise for the delay in my response, just communicating with you has shifted a blockage, which has resulted in many of my questions being answered, Namaste and thank you x |
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Feb 13 2021 : 8:07:56 PM
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A question I do have is...
Okay so what is hindering my return to practice is, that since my awakening a little practice has a big effect, not only on me, but on those around me, people within a radius of me experience effects that I can only describe as over purification; so I guess my question is, is this something that I should not concern myself with and accept that as they are within my energy field... that everything they are experiencing is exactly what they are meant to be experiencing, or...
I apologise if this has been discussed previously on here or in the lessons, if it has, a link to the relevant would be very much appreciated.
Prem Om |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Feb 14 2021 : 05:49:03 AM
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Hello Yogabuzz108
what are the people around you experiencing? |
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Feb 14 2021 : 6:24:02 PM
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Hello Maheswari,
So everything from acting out of character e.g. over expressive, over emotional, aggressive etc. to anxiety, acute anxiety, OCD, PTSD etc. |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Feb 15 2021 : 03:33:47 AM
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Hello Yogabuzz108
i feel that you first should focus on yourself.Since you had those extreme fear episodes maybe you can reduce practices for some time and see how you feel then how others around you feel
Usually our energy does affect others but as far as i know it can not make someone around you who never had ocd or ptsd become an ocd or ptsd case
Maybe others can chime in if they know any better
I suggest you fill in this questionnaire cause it is not really clear what are your practices and background
https://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic...=11628#11628
You can copy ,paste and answer the questions in this thread
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Edited by - maheswari on Feb 15 2021 03:44:33 AM |
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interpaul
USA
551 Posts |
Posted - Feb 15 2021 : 1:32:26 PM
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| Ygoabuzz108, Emotions are certainly contagious. We are social creatures and our moods affect others around us. How that works mechanistically, to my knowledge, hasn't been sorted out. I have noticed my dog will make funny sounds often when I'm having an intense inner state, especially when she is sleeping. For many of us the main reasons we do yoga, after experiencing the personal benefits is to positively affect others around us (stillness in action, outpouring of divine love). I agree with Maheswari ,if you are experiencing these types of unpleasant experiences you may need to dial things back in your own practice. It is possible you may be projecting these experiences onto others conceptually and not through your practices. |
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zamolxes
Romania
93 Posts |
Posted - Feb 15 2021 : 4:25:53 PM
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Hello all, thought I'd throw my 2 cents too,
I certainly haven't had an impact on people around me of such magnitude, just minor things expected from peaceful states of mind. But there were many cases in which people arounde me acted differently than they used to, events that I do not attribute to spiritual maturity.
For starters, I've found out how sensitive I am towards people's states of mind, a thing that made me be in their mindset as I see it, as Samyaman said above, emotions and subtle frustrations are shared between all. So when I am with someone who is sad, I become sad, when I am with depressed people I somehow find reasons to be depressed too until I get alone. I think I mentioned a friend who was borderline schizophrenic, and many times I would fall into psychotic states of mind. This would be something that happens to you, that you become attuned towards their deeper and hidden burdens instead of inducing them. In this case we get to B
We, being in a blank state, a white sheet, become a mirror to people's fears, traumas, burdens or complexes. Bringin into light their shadowy aspects. This same friend I had, would start to tell stories, the stories that always ran like flms in his mind, and that were slowly merging with reality, found an outlet in my silence as I was listening. And the more he told, the more he became as he saw himself in his mind, only that from outside he became more and more unstable. Every time he was dragged away from his comfort, he would become aggresive, anxious or crazy.. muttering every one or two sentences something with no sense at all, and as he became absorbed he started to suck the energy out of people, bringing them to a blank state with no depth, as if spreading his maladie. Sadly, that was really uncomfortable, with no possible way to help. Anyways, there can't be concrete answers to abstract correlations, especially when each of us experiences different things.
All I can say is that as you find your road and stability, when much of your unhealed past is brought to light and when strong experiences from practices subside and become calm your daily life will get calmer. No more crazy crazy, no freaks approaching you on the street to tell their lives, for it surely happened to me, no more getting caught up in people's dramas, but rather allowing them to breathe in from the ever so fresh air around us.
Peace |
Edited by - zamolxes on Feb 15 2021 5:37:14 PM |
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Feb 18 2021 : 8:01:49 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by maheswari
Hello Yogabuzz108
i feel that you first should focus on yourself.Since you had those extreme fear episodes maybe you can reduce practices for some time and see how you feel then how others around you feel
Usually our energy does affect others but as far as i know it can not make someone around you who never had ocd or ptsd become an ocd or ptsd case
Maybe others can chime in if they know any better
I suggest you fill in this questionnaire cause it is not really clear what are your practices and background
https://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic...=11628#11628
You can copy ,paste and answer the questions in this thread
Hi Maheswari,
Thanks for the link! I'll fill this out and post it back on here, hopefully it will make things a little clearer... but it will take me a while so please bear with me.
Shanti Prema |
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