Life after Kensho? What to do now?

Lithuania
35 Posts

Posted - Oct 07 2016 : 1:08:27 PM

Thanks looking at it now :)

quote:
Originally posted by parvati9

If you want to read about it, the topic is "Ailing Bhakti and Spiritual Apathy" in the Self Pacing subforum.

love
parvati

sunyata

USA
1513 Posts

Posted - Oct 07 2016 : 5:27:13 PM

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall

It would just calm me a bit if someone chime in and say - hey I know what you experienced its X....and your way is Y... just relax :)

Because right now for some reason - it feels like I am dying...and have 0 motivation towards anything...mind is calm...you guys advice to serve.... but right now there is not even motivation towards that....

I walk in the street and I see those sorrow n sad faces....and I take all of that into me like a sponge....

Can someone explain where is this sadness coming from? I thought it will be all beautiful / love / joy.....

It's not like negative emotions but at the moment feels like apathy towards everything and anything...

You got it- Relax! Just go about your day. Keep up your daily routine.

The symptoms you are experiencing is common after an opening you just experienced. Nothing much to do except self pace and ground.

Edited by - sunyata on Oct 07 2016 5:27:43 PM

parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Oct 08 2016 : 11:35:50 AM

Nothingatall

There was some difficulty with the crown opening here. Looking back to a year ago, I recall quite a few episodes of overload ... none of them were crisis level ... but the opening, once it commenced, was very rapid. Following that, it took several months to stabilize.

I was in such a big hurry to "get enlightened". Then crash and burn. Before crashing ... the spiritual path was my reason for living. Now, with nothing to seek and nowhere to go, there is only ordinary daily life. Except that life seems more dynamic, sacred, intimate. Surrender happens more frequently. It's easier to stay close to the divine. Chop wood/ carry water is no longer tedious chore, rather praise to the divine.

This place in consciousness is a relief, it is so welcoming, warm, cozy, peaceful, full of divine grace. It's an honor to be alive. It's an honor to appreciate every tiny detail of existence. I love to serve and am happy to let the radiance pour out of my heart. There is gratitude for all the small things that were previously overlooked, ignored or taken for granted.

Just to be present with the moment is sacred, delightful. Life has become simple and pure and there is plenty of time for everything.

Blessings to you dear soul

love
parvati

edit/ clarity brevity

Edited by - parvati9 on Oct 08 2016 2:27:16 PM

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 08 2016 : 11:54:23 AM

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall

It would just calm me a bit if someone chime in and say - hey I know what you experienced its X....and your way is Y... just relax :)

Refer again to my response earlier in the thread:
http://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic....16476#140732

United Kingdom
1734 Posts

Posted - Oct 08 2016 : 12:07:08 PM

hi nothingatall

You have received a lot of good advice.

Just wanted to say that everything will be fine. You have invested in your yoga practice and the results are coming up. Sometimes they can come a little too strong, it can be overwhelming. We then step back from practice, we ground. When we have stabilised we come back to a level of practice that is comfortable.

I shouldn't worry about pinpointing the exact concepts - what type of Samadhi it was. The experiences ebb and flow. You are making progress - this is what matters. Stay the course. Make sure you're steady - self-pacing is the word.

Reading some of the lessons on this website may help you. If your guru in not in reach to answer your questions, you can find some answers here. It doesn't matter that you practice a different type of yoga. The journey to enlightenment is the same, with some individual variations of course. Yogani is explaining it very well. When you feel grounded enough, have a read.

All the best to you

Edited by - BlueRaincoat on Oct 08 2016 12:32:18 PM

United Kingdom
1734 Posts

Posted - Oct 08 2016 : 1:17:49 PM

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall
It would just calm me a bit if someone chime in and say - hey I know what you experienced its X....and your way is Y... just relax :)

OK, maybe you're right. Let's see if this helps:
I have had the kind experience you describe, more than once. I haven't been very concerned with the terminology, but Sunyata has clarified it: it's called Nirvikalpa samadhi. Thank you Sunyata.
And yes, it can lead to some energetic overload, which you are obviously experiencing in the aftermath.

It does not require to change course with your practice, only to self pace more carefully and ground.

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall
I walk in the street and I see those sorrow n sad faces....and I take all of that into me like a sponge....

Can someone explain where is this sadness coming from? I thought it will be all beautiful / love / joy.....

That is normal, it is the consequence of being one with everything. You are not really separate from anyone else, so you feel their emotions, their joy and their pain. Don't worry, you will grow to integrate this. You will still feel other people's emotions, but they will not overwhelm you.

You'll be fine, it will all settle down. Stay off practices for a while, ground, and then do some reading - it always helps to understand what's going on. You'll find some lessons on this website and more on AYP Plus.

Good luck!

Lithuania
35 Posts

Posted - Oct 09 2016 : 03:42:44 AM

Was your experience spontaneous both times? Deeper 2nd time?

My teacher said that it's almost never you get enlightened the 1st time it happens to you and you will need multiple experiences in order to get rid of ego/( I paraphrased so obviously it's skewed - not his words)

quote:
Originally posted by BlueRaincoat

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall
It would just calm me a bit if someone chime in and say - hey I know what you experienced its X....and your way is Y... just relax :)
OK, maybe you're right. Let's see if this helps:
I have had the kind experience you describe, more than once. I haven't been very concerned with the terminology, but Sunyata has clarified it: it's called Nirvikalpa samadhi. Thank you Sunyata.
And yes, it can lead to some energetic overload, which you are obviously experiencing in the aftermath.

It does not require to change course with your practice, only to self pace more carefully and ground.

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall
I walk in the street and I see those sorrow n sad faces....and I take all of that into me like a sponge....

Can someone explain where is this sadness coming from? I thought it will be all beautiful / love / joy.....
That is normal, it is the consequence of being one with everything. You are not really separate from anyone else, so you feel their emotions, their joy and their pain. Don't worry, you will grow to integrate this. You will still feel other people's emotions, but they will not overwhelm you.

You'll be fine, it will all settle down. Stay off practices for a while, ground, and then do some reading - it always helps to understand what's going on. You'll find some lessons on this website and more on AYP Plus.

Good luck!

United Kingdom
1734 Posts

Posted - Oct 09 2016 : 05:18:46 AM

Yes, the experiences were spontaneous in the sense that I didn't choose the time and the place. However they were brought about by years of practice - in that sense they were not spontaneous.
The second time the unity was more complete. I guess you can call it 'deeper'.

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall
My teacher said that it's almost never you get enlightened the 1st time it happens to you and you will need multiple experiences

You don't get enlightened the second time either

. Nor the 3rd, and probably not the 4th ...

There is a post by Sunyata on the previous page, where she talks about Nirvikalpa samadhi and Sahaja samadhi.

quote:
Originally posted by sunyata
Sahaja samadhi or as we say Unity in AYP is the highest form of Samadhi to function in this world, abiding in it 24/7 and this is where the magic happens.

You see, it's when you've stabilised the unity (that state of being one with everything) so that it stays with you permanently and permeates all you words and deeds, then you are enlightened. So, long way to go from your first few experiences of samadhi.

I wish you safe journey there.

pkj

USA
158 Posts

Posted - Oct 09 2016 : 7:37:34 PM

Hi Lot of great advice already. Few things to share as I have gone through similar experience about 4 yrs ago. We usually tries to intellectualize too much abt the kind of Smadhi and why it happened. One thing is very certain fruit ripes at the right time so the Key is not to attach to the experience too much. Easier said than done. Letting go and surrendering definitely helps and also gives some of the answers we are looking for. Sometimes just resting and having long walks in nature helps. Since you already experienced the experience it should motivate you to do more the process than the end journey (Smadhi). This is all and over here. So a meditation routine with surrendering definitely helps to go to the answers. It only comes with the practice no one intellectually make it understand. All the answers are within you and will appear at the right time.

All the best.

Lithuania
35 Posts

Posted - Oct 10 2016 : 07:01:16 AM

Thanks I already feel much better, everything stabilized - now i feel peace, calmness, goodness, love and joy of being :) Everything good as it is...so no worries anymore :)

At the moment i am watching how fly is enjoying eating banana = so much fun :)

quote:
Originally posted by pkj

Hi Lot of great advice already. Few things to share as I have gone through similar experience about 4 yrs ago. We usually tries to intellectualize too much abt the kind of Smadhi and why it happened. One thing is very certain fruit ripes at the right time so the Key is not to attach to the experience too much. Easier said than done. Letting go and surrendering definitely helps and also gives some of the answers we are looking for. Sometimes just resting and having long walks in nature helps. Since you already experienced the experience it should motivate you to do more the process than the end journey (Smadhi). This is all and over here. So a meditation routine with surrendering definitely helps to go to the answers. It only comes with the practice no one intellectually make it understand. All the answers are within you and will appear at the right time.

All the best.

Edited by - nothingatall on Oct 10 2016 07:08:57 AM

Lithuania
35 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 3:45:01 PM

Hey guys, i just find out how exactly my experience is called = its Kensho / im 99.99% sure this is how it's called because its started from the sudden insight...

Would appreciate if someone would chime in - who experienced Kensho / and what is the appropriate terminology for Yoga if there is any...

This is what i found about Kensho

Ch'an expressions refer to enlightenment as "seeing your self-nature". But even this is not enough. After seeing your self-nature, you need to deepen your experience even further and bring it into maturation. You should have enlightenment experience again and again and support them with continuous practice. Even though Ch'an says that at the time of enlightenment, your outlook is the same as of the Buddha, you are not yet a full Buddha

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 5:08:04 PM

I've experienced Kensho 26 times. In fact, I have a Kensho spreadsheet with all my hours logged precisely. Then I meet with fellow members of my extra-special Kensho club, and we turn our Kensho hours into monopoly money, and play the enlightenment board game in which we accumulate more property and money to boost our enlightenment.

If you send me a private email, I can put you on the list to get into the super-elite Kensho club.

P.S. Let me know when you attain full Buddhahood, and I'll make you privy to an even more exclusive club for the Supreme Tathagatas. But first get some more Kensho under your belt.

Lithuania
35 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 5:15:32 PM

Hey Bodhi, my question was serious :) I am not sure why are you joking in this way :)

quote:
Originally posted by Bodhi Tree

I've experienced Kensho 26 times. In fact, I have a Kensho spreadsheet with all my hours logged precisely. Then I meet with fellow members of my extra-special Kensho club, and we turn our Kensho hours into monopoly money, and play the enlightenment board game in which we accumulate more property and money to boost our enlightenment.

If you send me a private email, I can put you on the list to get into the super-elite Kensho club.

P.S. Let me know when you attain full Buddhahood, and I'll make you privy to an even more exclusive club for the Supreme Tathagatas. But first get some more Kensho under your belt.

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 5:26:22 PM

P.S.S. Another option is for you to join the Anti-Ego Club. Those are really extraordinary people who have conquered and gotten rid of their ego and mind. I'm still at the mercy of both ego and mind, so even I can't join that club, despite my accumulated credits of Kensho.

Edited by - Bodhi Tree on Oct 13 2016 5:50:09 PM

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 5:27:26 PM

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall

Hey Bodhi, my question was serious :) I am not sure why are you joking in this way :)

Sorry, humor is a byproduct of too much Kensho.

sunyata

USA
1513 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 9:17:11 PM

Who mentioned the Anti-Ego Club?

I'm the treasurer of that club. Pay your fees and you are officially a member.

. Just kidding!

Hi nothingatall,

Just go back and re-read all the advice you have received so far. The answers to your questions are all in there.

Wishing you the best.

Edited by - sunyata on Oct 13 2016 9:18:12 PM

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2016 : 9:34:53 PM

quote:
Originally posted by sunyata

Who mentioned the Anti-Ego Club? I'm the treasurer of that club. Pay your fees and you are officially a member..

If you're the treasurer, then Blanche must be the President, and I imagine BlueRC is the Vice President, and I...well, I am the devil's advocate.

United Kingdom
1734 Posts

Posted - Oct 14 2016 : 1:53:50 PM

quote:
Originally posted by nothingatall

Hey Bodhi, my question was serious :) I am not sure why are you joking in this way :)

I'll tell you what I think nothingatall. My first reaction to your post was "Does he think that if he calls this state by a different name he's going to get different answers?" A different tradition will give you yet another term for it.

As Sunyata pointed you, you've got pretty much all the views that AYPers are likely to hold on this matter in the two pages of replies.

quote:
Originally posted by Bodhi Tree
If you're the treasurer, then Blanche must be the President, and I imagine BlueRC is the Vice President, and I...well, I am the devil's advocate.

It is just possible Cody that I have a more vicious ego than you do. We're all informed by our own experiences. I'll take the Vice President position only if I get paid a very large amount of money for the job.

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 14 2016 : 5:38:40 PM

Only top dollar for you, Blue.

But all joking aside, and getting back to how this relates to AYP, I just want to convey to Nothingatall that karma yoga is a big part of practices, and that's why Yogani wrote an entire book on karma and bhakti, because the internal experiences of samadhi/kensho/witness are not enough.

If your profit motive has dwindled, and you feel detached and indifferent, just know that a new desire will emerge, and that is the desire to contribute something altruistic to society that doesn't merely hinge upon personal profit or financial gain. It's that desire to turn inner silence into action that is what sets AYP apart from a lot of passive approaches, and samyama is a mental way of helping our noble ideals come into physical reality.

I've been to high places internally (both sober and on psychedelic drugs—DMT is a hell of a molecule), but I've had to return to the inevitable need to translate the inner magic into something on the outside. I've gotten burned for trying to cling to the inside for too long. So, levels and notions of samadhi are highly subjective and don't mean as much as what we can bring to the table in terms of palpable and tangible expressions of stillness in action and divine love.

If you think you've attained a deep level of samadhi, then make sure you go out and prove it with every single movement of your body. If it doesn't translate to the flesh in a perpetual continuum of outbound service, then it's of minimal importance.

[Also, just to clarify: all of this talk is directed to myself as much as anyone else. I'm challenging myself to keep pushing the limits of what I can accomplish with my body (self-pacing applied), so please know that I'm merely sharing a monologue and stream of self-inquiry that occurs within my own mind on a regular basis.]

Ecdyonurus

Switzerland
479 Posts

Posted - Oct 15 2016 : 02:50:18 AM

Nice post, Bodhi - I agree 100%.