|
|
|
Author |
Topic |
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 08 2015 : 11:12:37 PM
|
Starting a journal seems like a good thing to do as enlightenment is more of a process than a thing.
I grew up fairly devout Catholic as a child but in my teens came to question it for what now seem like fairly obvious reasons... there is essentially no teachings that help you validate and experience things for yourself. Certainly never thought that a sinner like me could ever hope for something like enlightenment...
Then about 5 years ago I remember saying something to G/d in a rare moment of prayer along the lines of "you made me so rational, so scientific (I studied graduate quantum physics and worked in nanotech for 13 years), please just give me a sign". Well, divinity has done just that in various ways over the last 5 years, so I got my wish and could not be happier abou that thus far
Starting with meeting my future wife shortly thereafter, which marked the beginning of my spiritual awakening, I soon had spontaneous visionary experiences, out of body experiences, etc.
I was fortunate to also take some breathing workshops (both pranayama and Holotropic breathing) which gave me further visionary experiences and assisted me in my Dream Yoga practice.
I have had some amazing non dual experiences both in waking consciousness and while out of body, and I have come to believe that the next stage of our evolution is a kind of "Democratization of Enlightenment", a term I was introduced to at a spiritual workshop by a Rabbi named Marc Gafni.
The idea being that even in the day of many of the great avatars like Buddha or Christ, democracy as we know it today was not at all widespread. Much less the access to the real knowledge needed to become enlightened. So now here we are and democracy has proliferated, but enlightenment has not.
Enter concepts like the Boddisatva vow, or the Kabbalistic idea that the second coming of the Messiah will not be an individual but rather everyone waking up... this is what I long to see.
This is why I resonate so strongly with this material in this site and the works of Yogani in general. The guru is indeed in all of us, and now things like technology can help us see that. The internet allows Yogani and others to propagate their enlightened wisdom to all who care to read it. It is like Buddha meets the internet
Now, on a somewhat more grave note, I also see that technology is growing exponentially, possibly getting out of control. On paper exponential curves look beautiful. In real life systems that grow exponentially blow up or die, witness atomic bombs and bacteria populations growing exponentially then dying from their own waste in a petri dish...
Great minds with a vested interest in technology advancement are actually warning us *against* exponential technology, people like Bill Gates, Stephen Hawking, and Elon Musk of Tesla Motors are all warning that AI (Artificial Intelligence) could eventually wipe out humanity.
And why not? At the current rate computers double in power every 1.5 years, so once they are as powerful as a human brain, at that rate 10 years later they are 1000 times more powerful. And presently the likely place such AI will be born is in a corporate setting like Google, or as a Wall St. Algorithm, so they would be born by definition from a place of greed to begin with...
So if humanity might only have 20 to 30 years left before some exponential tech takes us out (biotech doubles every 5 months, waaaaay faster than computers double in power)... what can be done.
Well to me it is obvious, more of us need to wake up and raise the collective level sufficiently to slow down this progress. We are trying to create infinite intelligence when it already resides inside of us, how ironic, no need for that.
I view this threat of technology as more of an opportunity for all to awaken. I started a FB page dedicated to helping bridge the gaps of understanding between science and spirituality, and dedicated towards this idea of a Democratization of Enlightenment.
https://www.facebook.com/technoenlightenment
In the end I may be a foolish dreamer, and that is fine by me. Likely as is said in Desiderata, all is unfolding as it should. Yet still I have compassion to drive me and the thought of all of humanity possibly meeting with a self created fate is not something I can avert my gaze from.
So that is what now drives me. I seek enlightenment for its own sake, yet also because I feel it is necessary to help others to awaken, and to spread the message that such a thing as enlightenment is even possible.
I speak science and marketing and spirituality well, which I view as the 3 lengua franca in some sense of the modern day, so my message to others will be a mix of all of these wrapped together. Where necessary I will talk to the lower chakra needs of those who are not awakened and try to gently implant what I call "positive trojan horses" that suggest change is needed...
And with that long intro out of the way, I will start journaling my experiences, such as they may be. Namaste everyone, if you made it this far thanks for reading |
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 08 2015 : 11:34:50 PM
|
MILESTONE: Kechari Stage 2/3
3/7 Evening Practice -trying out Kechari Mudra
I have been practicing for about a month now with SBP and DB, however, I came across this site maybe a year ago when I was looking for ways to open my third eye and found kechari mudra. Knowing what I now know I realize this was premature and out of place, however I gave kechari mudra a go.
Turns out my tongue was/is very long and I was pretty much able to get to stage 2 quickly. But I did not stick with it.
Now, after a month of practice I thought I would give it a quick try and it seems I could go a bit further than when I had tried it in the past.
I go up on the left side and now I dont even need to use a finger to assist to get in. Then I feel immediately with the top of my tongue a large rounded smooth surface.
If I then push a bit with my finger it seems like the tip of my tongue gets past that area (which seems to be maybe a half an inch high or so) to what I assume is the start nasal passages. This part feels a bit more firm, and slightly rounded at the base.
At least when I got there, I wondered if I was starting to get in enough to block off the air in one nostril. Turns out I did not fully manage that, I could still breath through the nostril I was targeting (while blocking the other one with my hand) but it was slightly harder and made a bit of a noise.
At that stage, it feels like I can bend the tip of my tongue forward as if to cover or push into that passage, and the tip sort of burns a bit from the strain (not in a bad way, kind of pleasant actually).
Thus far no negative symptoms, will of course back off if I get any. It does seem to give me stronger 3rd eye pulsing than normal.
I also had done jala neti for the second time ever prior to this sitting, seemed intuitively like a good thing to do before Kechari.
|
Edited by - technoyogi on Mar 09 2015 11:09:05 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2015 : 01:16:32 AM
|
3/9 Evening practice
What went well: nice energy movement, felt like I was feeling my bones relax almost. Got more energy flow on right side of body and scalp than left side...
What was a challenge: gut was gurgling so much that it was actually distracting me from DM a bit...
Sat in my closet for the meditation as I always do. My wife and I set up a meditation room with crystal bowls, pillows, candles, etc, but somehow my intuition was telling me to be in pure dark so the closet was better for that. Very cave like somehow...
Sat down and relaxed for a minute, went into Siddhasana and began spinal breathing, maybe did it for about 10 minutes or so. Was better able to trace my spine than yesterday.
Began doing Samma Vritti. I like this pranayama as it contains all parts of the breath and it feels to me like I am distributing prana to all parts of my body. Sometimes if I go to a 15 count, I feel my teeth pulsing with energy. Might just be blood rushing to the gums really but it still feels good.
In the middle of Samma Vritti felt like trying Kechari again. I decided that since I had no negative symptoms from the day before it would be OK to try again. I probably only did a minute of it. It does seem to charge up the practice.
Went into DM, had a bit harder time than yesterday staying on the mantra but was happy with this too as it would mean I am purifying either way. After maybe 15 minutes I decided to drop the mantra and let my mind roam, or at least this is what I tell myself yet it is a way to trick myself not to think and just focus on the breath still. This was good and I had nice inner silence.
Took a moment to finish that up then transitioned to Samyama laying down. My left leg was asleep from the sitting. This Samyama practice is new for me and I am just saying some positive words like Love, Peace, etc. every 15 seconds I know I need to read the actual list, but for now it seems OK.
Somewhere in there I blissed out a just a bit and stopped Samyama. When words try to come they were like nonsense words. Like some words like "Palagaran", etc. Felt like I was thinking but not really since these words made no real sense...
Finished up with centering and gratitude for the session and came to write this, maybe about 50 minutes of total session...
|
|
|
jusmail
India
491 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2015 : 02:30:23 AM
|
Keep up the great work. |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2015 : 5:22:21 PM
|
Thanks Jusmail, I hope to
Week of 3/9/2015 - Summary = stomach gurling, some conductivity, tried adding mulabandha and sambhavi mudras for the first time. Seems to given me loose bowels but not in any uncomfortable way, so chalking that up to purification
Monday - did a longer morning session, started it with an epsom salt and clay bath, rinse off shower, 10 minutes of my own favorite asanas (need to get the quick list Yogani suggests and try that), then did 5 min SBP, 5 min SV, 10 min DM, 5 min Samyama.
Later now in the day I listened to my usual focus music for work (Focus at Will app, Oct Beta Test). It is the same 40 min track, played over and over, yet now likely in part to the increased ecstatic conductivity of the practice, I always get goose bumps in a particular part, and sometimes tears of joy while looking out my window at the perfection of nature and humanity around me....
-interesting moment where I was looking at a visiting seagull and felt sorry for it because it is less alpha than another one and gets chased away a lot. I suddenly found myself sending it energy as if to will it to be stronger, and suddenly it was seeming to respond, almost getting taller and a bit agitated...
Will try to just keep editing this particular post as the week goes on that way I have the memories of events fresh in my mind.
Evening practice - SBP, SV, DM, while in Saddhasana, then laying down, early attempts at Samyama, no kechari this time.
Some energetic effects, mainly third eye pulsing, some crown activity. Probably total of 30 to 40 minutes. all combined.
Tuesday Asana->Saddhasana: SBP, SV, DM, Samyama 30 minutes Right side of body tingles like prior day, interesting so localized to right side. Forgot to add "Akasha" in Samyama. Some stomach gurgling started during samyama. Some coughing too, which had never happened before. Felt like I was coughing up some phlegm... maybe some purification lol.
Better able to catch myself during DM going "outside" to the world and coming back to the mantra almost immediately often, instead of long periods of outside thought.
Ended for some reason with a standing complete Yogic breath, had an amazing vibration effect in my face, thought reality might wink out there for a bit.
Felt just a bit of a pressure in my temples 4 hours later, though could be from working for 4 hours straight...
Evening session - SBP, DM, Samyama - lots of stomach gurgling, very relaxing session though. Mind a bit more restless during DM, yet got my whole forehead to have a very pleasant sensation. Possible Kumbaka starting, went very shallow at least, had to remember to breathe.
Wednesday Did a session at 4 PM, not optimal but better than nothing Asana 5min, Saddhasana: SBP 10 min, DM 15 min Forgot Ujayii on the exhale in SBP. Tried mulabanda, but even though I could flex it for long periods, for some reason it felt like the stress of flexing extended down into my leg, so I didnt want to get distracted and gave up on that. Gurling, an odd burnt smell, dreamlike snipets came as I seemed to drift somewhere, and at some point instead of saying IAM, caught myself randomly saying some other word. Maybe that was me giving myself a secret mantra like they supposedly give you in other traditions lol. Went back to IAM of course...
Evening session SBP w/ Mulabandha, DM, Samyama - Mulabanda - tried the version where I did it only while on the inhale. Starting it each time seemed to immediately send a pulse to my brow well before my SBP got there. gurgling at the end a bit, not nearly as much as day session. IAM seemed to be easier at one point to keep in rhythm with heart beat. Then later just being witness to the IAM happening on its own made it easier to just keep going without thinking.
Thursday Morning Saddha asana -> SBP w/ ascending Mulabandha, DM, Samyama - some gurgling, the bottom part of my right index finger had a dull ache, other than that no discomfort.
Night, same routine, tried experimenting with addition of Sambhavi Mudra. Was better at remembering pranayama restriction only on the exhale. DM - started off really strong, almost unbroken concentration for 2 minutes or so which was a first. Overall a good session. At end, felt like I let the mantra sort of vibrate all of my body, and not just be in my head. Very relaxing feeling. First time in a long time doing it before dinner... Lots of random memory snipets even going back to childhood during meditation during the last week too... Brow was throbbing intensely, felt like a mini pulsar.
Friday AM - 5Asana, 5SBP, 5SV, 15DM. Thoughts were harder to control than 3/12.
PM - 10SBP, 25DM, 10Samyama -> Gurgling was really strong, remember feeling somehow comforted by it. Just me and this little universe of trillions of bacteria in my gut getting stimulated by prana... Had read up more on Samyama and drilled with the 10 sutras so that I remembered them better this time, it was very comforting and I had more stillness during samyama than DM. Noticed some odd sensation in upper right abdomen under ribs...
Saturday AM - 5Asana, 7SBP, 5SV, 15DM, 5 Samyama. Started DM with intention to be focused and that helped keep stillness. PM - 5 SBP, 5 SV, 25 DM no samyama - last 5 min of the DM rather distracted.
Sunday AM - 10, SBP, 20DM, no bells or whistles. Was somewhat distracted.
PM - felt very ungrounded due to events in the day, a rather incendiary email from a client, lots of tough deadlines. Decided to self pace skipped this session entirely. Slept poorly, but did some brief meditation when I woke at 5 am, felt my body go into a blissful state eventually. Usually in past cases like this I was never able to go back to sleep.
When I woke up, the client had read my email and had a miraculous change of heart.
|
Edited by - technoyogi on Mar 16 2015 2:13:37 PM |
|
|
Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 11 2015 : 06:00:41 AM
|
quote: Enter concepts like the Boddisatva vow, or the Kabbalistic idea that the second coming of the Messiah will not be an individual but rather everyone waking up... this is what I long to see.
YES |
|
|
Ecdyonurus
Switzerland
479 Posts |
Posted - Mar 12 2015 : 1:47:49 PM
|
Hi technoyogi, I admire your intensity and intention on the path of yoga.
But I wonder if your idea of writing a journal with so many detailed reports is sustainable. Also, writing down the scenery and body symptoms you experience during practices may be an obstacle for your progress. Actually, it could be more effective to simply don't care about it at all.
Just my opinion, of course. |
Edited by - Ecdyonurus on Mar 12 2015 1:50:16 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 12 2015 : 5:34:38 PM
|
Good points Ecdyonurus, thanks for taking the time to read and comment.
I suppose I am taking the "spiritual scientist" approach for now, and it may indeed not be sustainable. It is just that I have never kept a diary and for many things in life looking back I wished I had. That said, I am sure life will intervene and many days I will have no time to catalog this way. Doing it for now while I do have the time, and then when I do not I can compare the two approaches :-)
And Charliedog, thanks for the encouragement, sounds like we are on the same page! |
Edited by - technoyogi on Mar 12 2015 7:02:41 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 16 2015 : 11:53:28 PM
|
Week of 3/9/2015 - Summary = spent a bit less time than last week on practice due to time constraints. Advanced in Kechari as noted below in bold. Started to end practice with Child's pose in order to rest more effectively. In one session got into a bit of automatic Asvini Mudra. Seemed like it was a natural consequence of the root getting "tired" and then sort of just spasming a bit...
Monday - AM = 5 SBP, 15DM PM = 25DM - this was one of my better meditations yet. My body started going gently blissful, nice energetic humm at my spine behind my heart, almost fell asleep.
Tuesday AM = 5 SBP, 15DM PM - 10SBP, 20DM
Wednesday: New kechari milestone ========================================= Feels like this deserves special delineation - today I had a kechari session that I had to shut down midway because sure enough, it was just going up forcefully once I got it in there. Seemed physically impossible what it was trying to do....
I had this sense like "I know I am not quite ready for this, more purification to be done... nice to know it is there when I need it or am ready for it... I posted in my other post on kechari about how it led to amazing tantric sex later in the night. =========================================
THursday: Usual day, but at night meditation I did it in the meditation room. Since it was not pitch dark I saw a bit of a tunnel or star forming at third eye area. Also, later in meditation, felt like I AM was bouncing from root to crown through shushumna, nice feeling. Like maybe I went up, AM went down, over and over...
Friday: AM: woke with slight tension in back of head but it went away so did morning sit as usual. 10 SBP, 20 DM Realization - I have been doing something like Sambhavi naturally many times throughout the last many years without know what it was, I was closing my eyes, focusing strongly at the center point, feeling a sort of intensity that helped my "marshal my energies" and often would see a brief star flash. PM - 10SBP, 20DM, 5Samyama Realized that I had not been seeing the star with the circle in it, this is more like a 5 pointed star outline in white light with just darkness in the center. However, the reason I realized a difference was because during PM practice tonight, while doing Sambhavi intently, I DID see a very distinct single point of white light in somewhat of a circle. Dont know if it was the same white light point called the star, it was the first time I saw it in just meditation since I meditate in complete darkness. Have seen a star after a 75 minute pranayama session before, with other colors, and very persistent... Played with Kechari again, it is hard to resist. It is not automatic, but my tongue can go there, and it feels pleasant, and it definitely gets energy flowing, and as of yet no major issues. Hope I am not setting myself for some kind of cumulative event, but on a daily basis I seem to be fine...
Saturday AM - 10SBP, 20DM PM - 10SBP, 20DM
Sunday AM - 5SBP, 15DM Mid day played with Kechari, read whole 13 page kechari thread. Realized I had been going high but back toward back of my head. Went forward and still got to stage 2/3 but backed off as despite the curiosity of how far I can get not trying to trigger too much at this stage. PM - 5SPB, 15DM - best DM yet in terms of staying on the mantra, perhaps because I stayed in Kechari stage 1 the whole time...
|
Edited by - technoyogi on Mar 28 2015 2:14:12 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2015 : 10:27:17 PM
|
Week of 3/23 Summary: Started with interesting experience of doing pranayama in the dream state as per the link below. Kechari Stage 3/4 - Night of 3/25 before sleep I decided to see how far my tongue can go in Kechari, most definitely I can get the tip into the nasal passages now. Tested to see if I can block breathing in a nostril, that still is not happening. Not using this for extended time periods longer than say 30 seconds or so every now and then, mainly doing Kechari stage 1 and when I do meditations. It is like I have the switches in place without the full electricity yet, need to establish more ecstatic conductivity. Update on Sunday: got a bit of possible ecstatic conductivity at the "secret spot" - felt like a pleasant cross between stinging and an electric shock. Used blocking effectively during a tantra session
Monday Day started with some astral pranayama before I got out of bed: http://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic....PIC_ID=15148
AM - 5SBP, 15DM - did an abbreviated session because we had people in the house and I was busy. Fairly distracted session but better than not doing it. PM - 10SBP, 20DM, 5Sam did some light stretching before starting, mostly things to bend the spine forward and back.
Tuesday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM, was better at integrating SBP w mulabanda, samhavi, cool and warm currents, stage 1 kechari all at once. PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM felt bored somehow toward end of DM. Decided to try mantra out loud for first time, interesting at least as a contrast, made my head ring nicely even after one minute. Used meditation room instead of closet, better back support...
Wednesday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - added a little bit of Kechari stage 1 and 2 PM - 10 SBP, 25 DM - kind of lost track of time in DM. At some point I let the ringing in my ears become I AM and that seemed to keep me on track better than usual. And there is some kind of indirect visualization or concept of interlocking infinity symbols that seems to pervade the mantra, like somehow the criss crossing of the I AM polarity, hard to explain this one but it pops up every now and then...
THursday AM - 5Asana, 10SBP, 20DM - much more focused DM probably due to the Asanas PM - did practice right after a weight lifting workout for the first time ever. Definitely felt more surrender than usual. 10 SBP, 20 DM Tantra - had a tantra session where I lost control and had to use blocking, felt like I was not going to be successful but using all fingers and holding for about 90 seconds did the trick...
Friday - AM - 5Asana, 10SBP, 20DM - again more focused DM probably due to the Asanas and showering prior to meditation. Had some brief hynagogic imagery, something like a golden spiral with many gold rectangles shooting off of it. Went back to meditation of course. Also, felt like I felt the bottom of the spinal nerve briefly during DM, literally for just bout 2 or 3 seconds. PM - 5 SBP, 5 SV, 20 DM went in a bit earlier than normal, in part because I was tired from weight lifting the day before. - lots of random memory snippets from my life. At the end the mantra got fairly fuzzy. Used wedge cushion as always for back support during SBP, but then added a normal pillow as a wedge that gave me more comfort and back support, plan to use this for more comfort going forward.
Saturday AM - 5 min of band calistenics, shower, 10 min asanas, 10 SBP, 20 DM. - Strong pulse in forehead maybe due to addition of calisthenics. Ended by getting into lotus and relaxing through the slight discomfort. PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM, 5 Samyama - Tried tonight with no earplugs. . I had done this in the past but not while my wife was home. Of course there were added distraction, noise of her in the kitchen, but it was fine, a very good sit overall. Did one minute of stage 3 Kechari during the SBP, which gave a strong Ajna pulse that lasted even till now as I type the update.
Sunday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - very unfocused DM, lots of external distraction and just generally a somewhat fragmented state of mind. At end of everything I played with Kechari for about 30 seconds and got something akin to an ecstatic response from a spot higher up on the septum. This felt like a cross between a mild electric shock and stinging, yet in a pleasant way. On the flip side, felt the first ever burning sensation during meditation that I recall. Seemed to be in the base of my spinal nerve or maybe urethra. Felt like tube like energy. Only lasted about 15 seconds in total, and in small bursts of about 2 or 3 seconds, multiple times. Could have just been the pressure of Siddhasana, or that I am pushing the self pacing envelope too fast. Will continue to monitor future sessions.
PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM |
Edited by - technoyogi on Mar 30 2015 1:39:15 PM |
|
|
compassion
90 Posts |
Posted - Mar 26 2015 : 3:02:51 PM
|
quote: Originally posted by technoyogi Tuesday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM, was better at integrating SBP w mulabanda, samhavi, cool and warm currents, stage 1 kechari all at once. PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM felt bored somehow toward end of DM. Decided to try mantra out loud for first time, interesting at least as a contrast, made my head ring nicely even after one minute. Used meditation room instead of closet, better back support...
Hi technoyogi,
Seems like you are keeping to the twice-daily practice well. I haven't read in detail all of your posts, but something caught my eye on the last one. You mentioned that in one of the sessions you felt bored towards the end of DM and decided to try something different.
We generally interpret boredom to mean that we need to do something else, which is what you did. But boredom is only our way of avoiding something that we are reluctant to face. Starting to face what lurks within there can be an area of great discovery, and the fact that it is coming up in meditation is a sign that things are progressing nicely.
In deep meditation the practice is to return to the mantra when we notice that we are off it. If we notice boredom, we just gently return to the mantra, like anything else that comes up. |
|
|
ak33
Canada
229 Posts |
Posted - Mar 26 2015 : 5:16:17 PM
|
compassion makes an excellent point. Just come back to the mantra. Often we complicate the most simple of instructions. Good luck |
Edited by - ak33 on Mar 26 2015 5:16:34 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 26 2015 : 8:23:32 PM
|
Thanks for the comments compassion and ak33! Nice to have some people drop by this lonely outpost that is my journal
Since that day I have been good about sticking with the mantra said internally, but I am glad that it can be viewed as a positive that I actually got bored for the first time. Even this morning I was tempted to say a longer mantra that I used to use out loud but decided to just keep things relatively simple for now. This morning was possibly my best DM so far in terms of focus on the mantra, so things are going OK for now. Thanks again for the advice, I really appreciate anyone who even skims the journal given it is already a bit looooong lol |
|
|
jonesboy
USA
594 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2015 : 9:51:23 PM
|
Hi technoyogi
Loving the log, it is very detailed and is helping a lot. I love your honesty.
If you don't mind I would like to ask you a question.
How do you approach thoughts, feelings and sensations within your meditation session?
For instance do you go into your session with the intent of just letting go of the mantra? Notice your off and return to the mantra right?
If that is true, then anything else is just the brain/ego trying to stop you or distract you because it doesn't like silence. My job is to return to the mantra. That is how I think about it anyways.
So for me any thoughts during the session of using a longer mantra, checking out the visuals or being bored. Is just the brain not wanting to be silent and pulling me into those thoughts those daydreams. It is a game and the ego just scored. Now my job is to acknowledge this and go back to the mantra.
Sorry to rant and it is obvious you know what you are doing. I am just curious as to how you view it is all.
Take care my friend. |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2015 : 11:34:48 PM
|
Hi Jonesboy, thanks for the comments and the question!
I guess presently I do try to do pretty much what you said and what was instructed in the deep meditation book and the various writings. That is to say, yes, I try to just "gently favor" the mantra and get back to it when I get off of it. That single phrase, "gently favor" is what helped me switch to mantra meditation at all since prior to AYP I was used to either an out loud mantra (for a brief while I practiced SGI "nam myou hou ren ge kyou" mantras) or if not those then just noticing the breath. Yet this idea of gently favoring the mantra has allowed me to have a real meditation practice. I used to get too caught up in whether I was meditating "correctly" if I did not fully quiet my mind, now for the most part I just "gently favor" the mantra and understand what I need to do.
I admit I often get curious for a bit about the random memories that seem to be popping up all over the place. In tonight's session, I had a lot of these. Part of me wants to stop for a second and try to access if there was some emotion that likely went with that visual snippet, then I remember to just go back to the mantra.
Today for the first time in Siddasana, the pressure of my heal seemed to arouse me, and I just went back to the mantra. Always back to the mantra. I like what Yogani says somewhere that if some great figure or Avatar rides up to you on a Golden Chariot, you just go back to the mantra lol.
Seems to vary by the day, some days my mind stays on the mantra more, some days I find myself bouncing back and forth to thought streams. But since Yogani has said all of it is purification, it never feels frustrating or like wasted time.
I am barely getting to a month or so of doing it twice daily, and maybe 6 weeks or so into using this type of mantra, so sill much learning and practice to do, looking forward to whatever the journey has in store |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 30 2015 : 1:45:30 PM
|
Week of 3/30
Things started off well in my sleep. I went to bed feeling very stressed after having lost a full day of work in Microsoft OneNote. My emotions had the better of me for much of it even if I did realize this would pass. I remember thinking I might try to ask for some help in my yoga journey from the big guns of yoga like Yogananda or Babaji during the dream state if I could get lucid and remember to do so. That did not happen, but I did wake up in a bit of a "blissgasm" where it was like my whole head and some of my body was being divinely energetically massaged. Definitely felt like my "prayer" had been answered somehow.
During this week I decided to scale back on my practices a bit. Soon after I oddly got a bit depressed. Could have been coincidence because of things going on in my life. Yet I let them get really low somehow, more so than maybe in 4 years or so. It only lasted about 2 or 3 days. Feel somewhat motivated to ramp the practices up just a bit again.
Monday AM- 10 SBP, 20DM - started to feel a pulse in my root during DM. Alos, got whole body brief conductivity when I thought of transcending death. This came about as a distraction in DM because someone on FB had posted a really gruesome, horrific image that was stuck in my head for part of the DM as a distraction. I imagined seeing it could become repetitive with this and future meditations. Yet I also viewed it as purification, as all distractions are. So this negative turned into a positive in terms of ecstatic conductivity progress anyway.
PM - 10 SBP, 20DM 5 Samyama At end of SBP did 15 seconds or so of Kechari. Went from left side this time instead of the right, and I think I finally found the part where Yogani says the Eustachian tubes can guide you to curl the tongue into the nasal passages. Got a much stronger Ajna pulse going into DM than normal just from this 15 seconds and the 5 or so seconds I spent on the secret spot. Felt some slight breath suspension in DM, this sit felt very grounded and silent. This despite my wife opening the door, singing outside, etc. I used to tell her when I was meditating so that she would know to be quiet. Yet, from feedback here, I learned to welcome the distractions and just go back to the mantra. No need to inconvenience her anymore. Toward the end I lost the mantra and imagined myself like Neo in the matrix flexing after stopping the bullets for the first time. Random. But it sure charged up my energy and gave me goosebumps. Back to the mantra. I then had this sense that my inner vision was very 3D. It was pitch dark in my closet, but this was well formed. I would see and sense it then go back to the mantra. After samyama I had the desire to pray a bit in kneeling position, then in child's pose with my head down, so that was my rest.
Tuesday AM - abbreviated a bit 10 SBP and 15 DM - choppy meditation session PM - 5 SBP, 15 DM - cut out any mudras and bandas. This session was short but good. It had a lot of surrender inherent in it. I had decided to cut back on some of the advanced practices I had added in recently. Not because of any overload, but just to be safe about any future delayed effects. The mantra went really fuzzy into a sort of Ayyhhhohhmmm or some such more rounded form, I could see how unintentionally it might become OM if left to its own devices that way. My forearms and hands sort of faded from physical awareness but I could still sense the energetic aspects of them. I felt like if I just kept going with the mantra I might have been able to leave my body. Instead, I focused on staying with the mantra and doing a somewhat shortened session.
Wedensday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - felt strong ajna response, almost like an eye was scanning left and right. PM - 5 SBP, 10 DM - busy so just got in a session that kept the habit intact. Plus, felt like a natural way to scale back for a bit.
Thursday AM - 5 SBP, 15 DM - started SBP in a really anxious state but calmed fairly quickly. DM was fragmented but still Ajna turned on and is still pulsing now. Even with this scaled back practice currently I am clearly getting some energetic response and carrying it into the day. PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - The recent DMs seem to have this energetic component where my hands and arms and sometimes legs feel just a bit different, kind of like an etheric/energetic and not solid feeling. As usual, Ajna gets activated and stayed active. This reminds me, had a very brief lucid dream last night, could be related.
Friday AM - 5 SBP, 15 DM PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM meditated in my office instead of the closet, was a nice change of pace. Perhaps practice for meditating "on the road" later
Saturday - Woke during the night in a state where I felt I could sense my kundalini energy wanting to rise, but I felt it was not a good time. It seemed like tendrils of red energy. AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - had some sad thoughts and cried a bit during DM, yet still went back to the mantra PM - 10 SBP. 15 DM mantra got fuzzy and sounded more like OYOM OYOM at one point
Sunday - AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM |
Edited by - technoyogi on Apr 06 2015 12:47:57 PM |
|
|
Yonatan
Israel
849 Posts |
Posted - Mar 30 2015 : 6:40:47 PM
|
Hi technoyogi
I was following your journal and I love reading it and your progress. Very richly detailed and I love your spirit and resolve - good job!!
Seems like you are beginning to get some conductivity going great!! It does feel pleasant even after getting used to it.
Also I wanna say that your idea of reaching for help from Babaji or Yogananda is good. The benevolent beings love to help, and as you saw you got some response. It will continue to open up for you as you continue with practices, this relationship with the "higher ups" and your inner guidance will become more focused and sharp so much so that you'd know exactly what to do each moment from within. Some of this is definitely scenery but as Yogani says we can enjoy it in our daily lives and we get so enriched by a lot of it.
Enjoy and keep up the awesome work |
Edited by - Yonatan on Mar 30 2015 6:44:10 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Mar 31 2015 : 12:58:55 AM
|
Hi Yonatan!
Thanks for the encouragement, especially about trying to contact the "higher ups". The me from 5 years ago might think I am crazy haha, so good to have some support on this
I saw you hail from Israel! Don't want to be presumptuous in assuming you are familiar with the concept, but if so, another way of saying what my greatest motivation for practice is that I mentioned in my intro to this journal is that I hope to play a part, however small, in Tikkun Olam.
May all being be happy! And please know that your kind feedback has made the being on this end very happy |
|
|
Yonatan
Israel
849 Posts |
Posted - Mar 31 2015 : 06:54:24 AM
|
Your joy is my joy!!
Peace |
|
|
pkj
USA
158 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2015 : 3:29:53 PM
|
technoyogi
Agree with Yonatan's comments. I can see the love and bliss pouring from your writings as you are sharing very very personnel experiences. As I myself is an engineer and i can relate to lot of quiries posted by you. Also some of the experiences shared by you. Thanks again for sharing the amazing journey with all.
Blessings.
PKJ |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2015 : 01:52:14 AM
|
Thanks PKJ! Glad to have your feedback. Things have been a bit bumpy these days because I started to feel a bit foolish for having moved ahead too fast. But your perception and description of what I'm doing at least gave me some reinforcement that at least viewed from outside that I am doing at least something right
I have simplified my practice a bit this week and still it seems like some good things are happening, one small step at a time... |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2015 : 12:50:35 PM
|
Week of 4/6
I had scaled back a bit last week after reading some direct advice from Yogani, but I realized I had misinterpreted it. I reread it again and saw that he was talking about how once energy is flowing then results are usually magnified so self pacing would immediately be in order. He used a flywheel analogy with the flywheel flying off entirely and but I was seeing that as something of a dam bursting due to cummulative practice, sort of happening all at once.
So for now I think it is OK to go back to what I was doing since I did not get any major negative symptoms, then continue to self pace accordingly.
Monday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM Somewhat distracted DM but was focused during SBP PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - felt at one point like I was getting bored of hearing my own thoughts and after that was somewhat better able to stay on the mantra. This felt like somewhat of a milestone.
Tuesday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM rather distracted DM. Seems like when I roll right out of bed and into meditation I am too stiff or something... PM - nice evening sit 10 SBP, 15 DM, did some stretching first and felt nicely grounded, very relaxed, felt very peaceful. Third eye energetics extended down into my nose and cheeks somehow.
Wednesday AM - 7 SBP, 15 DM - was in a bit of a hurry so somewhat abbreviated practice. PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - This was a wonderful DM. I started late, around 11:30 PM. I had eaten just 2 hours earlier so it wasn't because I had fasted. Anyway, I felt so peaceful, calm, connected. Unlike many other DMs where I find myself thinking about the time, in this one I was ready for it to go on forever. The only thing different was I added in Kechari again during SBP, and let my tongue just get comfortable hanging out there.
Thursday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM - average sit. PM - had to sit on a full stomach, but still did 10 SBP, 20 DM
Friday AM - late sit, 10 SBP, 20 DM Epsom salt bath prior to PM sit, helped me relax PM - 10 SBP w some kechari, 20 DM
Saturday AM - 10 SBP, 20 DM PM - 10 SBP, 20 DM Sunday AM - 10 SBP, 15 DM - felt something in my lower spine as if I was feeling the spine itself. This was only for about 5 or 10 seconds, and it was more static than I would have expected if it was "conductivity". Prior to that though I definitely got a burst of conductivity that was pleasant and brought goosebumps. Also had some hypnagogic imagery of some kind of yellow rounded door that looked like a cross between a door and musical instrument, but managed to just go back to the mantra. PM - 10 SBP with maybe 3 of that Sama Vritti, 20 DM. Last sit of the week was the most interesting. Usual times, but during SBP for some reason I decided to really use force to inhale and exhale. This led to some prolonged conductivity as long as I did it, maybe 30 seconds. THen in meditation I felt like I was in the bigger space, and if I got off the mantra and focused on my visual field it was lots of sparks despite sitting in pure darkness. For some reason my eyes seemed to be looking more down than up, and they were darting back and forth a bit. I started to feel my 3rd eye not just forward but sort of at the base of the back of my head maybe?
|
Edited by - technoyogi on Apr 13 2015 02:29:48 AM |
|
|
SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2015 : 04:30:02 AM
|
Dear technoyogi,
Love your enthusiasm and sincerity. I love reading your contributions but please allow me to comment. From my perspective I feel you are adding too much too soon. You are a do, do, do when meditation is all about be, be, be. Whilst the techniques (some very advanced which in certain Yoga traditions you would not have had access to until 5 - 10 yrs of practice)are available and certainly do-able, Yogani says something about adding on practices. It should be guided by your Inner Guru. By adding more and more for the sake of keeping it exciting, you will miss the beauty of adding a technique at exactly the right time for the right experience. It would have all gone stale by the time you are actually ready for it. This is, of course, merely my perception. Please filter accordingly.
Sey
|
|
|
pkj
USA
158 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2015 : 5:14:37 PM
|
technoyogi
In my opinion inner guru will be best guide to move forward how much we need to do the practices. In my judgement each path is unique in certain ways even though we may follow similar guidelines. So if your intution says more then go far it as it may be applicable to your case. Just my 2 cents.
One question I have it may not be the right forum as I have acid reflex and I was reading one of your posts where you mentioned you were able to heal it. Could you pls elaborate on that.
Thanks and blessings.
PKJ |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2015 : 5:36:23 PM
|
Hi Sey,
By all means I welcome your comment, really that is half the reason I do a journal like this (the other half is that hopefully it can be of use to someone else later if they are starting out too).
Your comment is not the first time I have been told that I should have more "being" and less doing. I am hoping that DM will gradually phase me out of that.
In the meantime, I am at sort of a middleground. 2 or 3 weeks ago I was doing siddhasana all the way through with SBP that included mulabanda and sambhavi and followed by samyama. Sometimes I'd be throwing in level 3/4 kechari, too.
I intuitively felt that the level of inner witness was not really sufficient for samyama so I dropped that. Also scaled back the kechari. The sambhavi and mulabanda I am still deciding on. It felt like prior to starting to do them I had experienced something similar at different stages throughout my life. Like I had been doing Sambhavi instinctively at times. And this may not count, but mulabandha as PC exercises. I'd learned tantric control through this and just intuitively had been doing bramacharya.
Given my spontaneous kundalini even about 18 months ago that started me having OBEs, I figured something has already arisen energetically so this also is something I factored in. And oddly I have a lot of "external" validation about possible spiritual progress from past lives that I didn't seek out. I've been told by my wife's father that he thinks I was a monk in a past life. And a woman in my OBE group has had past life memories of her as my assistant when I was an ayurvedic practitioner. So as I factor everything in, I feel like I am just doing my best to "fall in line" with where the combination of bhakti and self pacing and various life events seem to be leading me.
Then there is the odd facility with which kechari comes to me. It almost just "feels" right. Like being with such a long tongue is so that I can do kechari haha
In a lot of ways, I'm just happy that my hardcore science oriented mind ever had experiences in the first place that could get me on this path. The me from 20 years ago could not have ever imagined doing the things I do now lol.
I actually don't feel like I have added these things to keep things exciting because thus far none of it has been very exciting anyway. If I compare the experiences I get to OBEs then I should be back to concentrating all my energies on having more of those!
So all this said I will still take to heart your council to be, be, be more than do, do, do to the extent possible where I am now. That is the second time this year I have been told that.
|
Edited by - technoyogi on Apr 07 2015 6:25:40 PM |
|
|
technoyogi
Canada
158 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2015 : 5:55:09 PM
|
Hi PKJ,
Well, long story short I wound up healing the acid reflux through lucid dreaming after trying about 100 other things. It is interesting too because 9 months later the physical reason for the acid reflux was found, I have a Hiatal Hernia. But whatever the case, the lucid dream fixed the symptoms. I went from slugging down antacids all the time and waking up 3x per night with severe anxiety and sometimes only sleeping about 4 hours total to sleeping like a baby.
I will copy for you the dream from my journal below, but first I will also cite the book where I learned the techniques to do this. It is Robert Waggoner's book Lucid Dreaming: Gateway to the Inner Self. That book can teach you how to lucid dream if you don't know how, then how to heal yourself in a lucid dream.
Took me about a month of intending to heal myself to 1.) have the lucid dream and then 2.) remember to heal myself.
Here is how it all went down:
------------------------------------- 6/22 Lucid Healing Dream Had a normal dream that I was at some kind of a concert, and people were jockeying for position and then I left and went to a nearby room. I had the realization that I was semi lucid, but I also felt like I had to struggle to keep it. I started touching things in order to ensure that I would stay lucid. I ran around the room looking for things to touch and came to a table and started touching objects on the table in an effort to gain full lucidity. (It is at this point in my recording I took on my iphone after waking up, that I start recalling a dream that had happened prior to this, and where I was shocked to hear myself talking about being in the Statue of Liberty!):
I recalled a dream that had immediately preceded this, where “it was weird, it was as if we were in the face of the Statue of Liberty”... it was a club that I guess was inside of the face of the Statue of Liberty, and there were women there reaching out to me, all of them dressed oddly like a street performer woman I had passed by in real life earlier in the day (she was from Japan and dressed sort of like Little Bo-Peep). There was something happening in the audience that felt mystical to me, there were people in the audience reading special books out loud…
At this point in the recording, I go back to the present moment in the dream where I am at the table, and apparently it is in the dream that I also had recalled being at the Statue of Liberty, maybe something about what I had been touching on the table made me recall that. Anyway, I became fully lucid and apparently started running around trying to find things to do. As I had not been actively practicing OBE/LD, I did not remember any plan of action yet. I came out on the porch of a place I knew in the dream to be a post office and there was a woman there I tried to talk to. She seemed uninterested in talking as many of the characters in my dreams often are. She walked off to her car and I waved at her but she ignored me.
I had a sense that I needed to find a higher purpose in this dream, and I can recall that many things happened yet I do not remember all of them. I have the vague memory that as I walked around there was somebody sort of following me, discussing the activities of other people.
Now here is where the dream finally starts to get interesting. I came across someone who looks like a woman I know in real life. She asked me about some experience she thought I had and I told her that to my knowledge that had never happened. I realized though that here was one of the first dream characters in a long time who might be interesting to talk to. At this point I noticed there were more people sitting around her in a semicircle… the setting seemed to be in a cold room, that gave me the feeling of the Arctic. Though, I suppose if the room were somehow housed in the face of the Statue of Liberty at night, it would be pretty cold too!
The woman asked me about my progress, and I seemed to think she was asking me about my spiritual progress, and part of me felt like I had not been making the progress I wanted to make and beyond that I did not really know how to answer. So I said “Well, in terms of my progress, I have been here a long time in this dream.” This to me was important to report because I knew that a lot of my dreams do not last as long as I would like them to.
Now in my recording I felt that was strange that I had known the dream was long and eventful because I could not remember a lot of the dream upon awaking. However, I did then suddenly recall as I talked into my recorder that in the dream I had created a “totem” somewhat like the totems from the movie Inception. Except this totem was used to keep me lucid throughout the dream and instead of a spinning top like in Inception, this was an opaque greenish, opaque, heart-shaped crystal that I carried in my pocket. I used this heart crystal to focus my intent and energy as I went along in the dream, carrying it like a “gratitude rock” like they talk about in the movie The Secret. It reminded me of a small jade heart that I had bought in Guatemala when I was about 12 years old in real life…
In the dream I was telling the group about some of my exploits in the dream up to that point (which again regrettably I did not remember too well upon waking up). I then told them “Well, I have not been lucid dreaming a lot recently, in part because I have been sick and have had to sleep in an weird upright position that is not very comfortable, and I value what sleep I can get these days more than trying to wake up to practice… I am just more focused on trying to get healthy”.
This was a good thing, because it reminded me about my number one plan of action, namely to get healed in the dream. Now I had attempted a healing about one month prior and did have some minor improvement (this was to heal acid reflux, I also had a more successful dream before that where I did heal a severely swollen, painful jaw). So in the present dream, I asked all the people in the group “You know, that reminds me, maybe while I am here, maybe I could receive a group healing from all of you guys?” The answer came back fast and unanimous “Sure!”
I remember then pulling up my shirt to expose my stomach and then going to sit in the corner. Again the details here are a bit fuzzy, but the group formed a closer semicircle around me, and I remember they were directing energy toward me with their hands. I heard one of them actually saying something that sounded like an incantation, while urging the rest of the group “let’s direct the energy with our hands”!
There was a wonderful blue glow emanating from their hands and entering my stomach, I could actually feel the rich, vibrant warmth of it. At this point I started to lose lucidity and I was in between dream consciousness and waking consciousness, and the scene began to take on the quality of an animated cartoon of sorts. The blue energy stream began to transform into this blue stream of energy that was now exiting my stomach instead of entering. It became this blue arc out of which tiny fish seemed to be jumping into and swimming upstream in a stream of energy that somehow filled my bedroom in real life and that I could see through my closed eyelids and eye mask.
As waking consciousness took hold even more, I imagined that perhaps this was representative of some bad microbes leaving my stomach. There was a video sales letter I had watched earlier in the day with an animation of “bad toxic bugs” which may have been responsible for that thought and this representation as well. The people in the group were still there guiding the process and the fish. Now my wife seemed to be there too and she was entertained by the “little fishies jumping out of the ocean”...
At this point I was almost fully awake and the vision was gone. I considered trying to re-enter the dream, but I knew that there was a lot of content and that if I did not record it then and there I would likely forget most of it, so I elected instead to wake up fully and record it. ----------------------------
So the summary is if you can have a lucid dream, you are in a profound trance/altered state. Then you purposely try to have yourself apply energy ideally through your own hands on the affected area, in this case your stomach. I have healed some other minor maladies and also used a bit of a pre-rehearsed incantation, but the energy from you hands is the key.
In this dream I was lucky to have these people help heal me, ideally it should have been directly from myself though. One mistake people make is to go looking for a doctor or other people to heal them. This seldom works for a lot of reasons.
So that is it, have a lucid dream, remember the intention to heal yourself, charge up some kind of healing energy in your hands, apply it to affected area, and enjoy the healing.
There is a guy in our OBE group who is a medical doctor. He had chronic shoulder pain for 3 years, daily. He used the same technique and had a Harry Potter-esque amount of energy get generated, and he healed his shoulder pain overnight.
Robert's book cites lots of other examples.
Hope this helps, I know it is not a turnkey method like drinking apple cider vinegar or what have you, but at the end of the day I thank my lucky stars I found it... |
|
|
Topic |
|
|
|
AYP Public Forum |
© Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) |
|
|
|
|