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nearoanoke
USA
525 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 24 2006 : 12:27:04 AM
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He met her on a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him. At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised, but due to being polite, she promised.
They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, she thought, please, let me go home.. suddenly he asked the waiter : "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee."
Everybody stared at him. So strange! His face turned red, but, still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it.
She asked him curiously : Why you have this hobby?
He replied: "When I was a little boy, I was living near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea , just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown. I missmy hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living
there". While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched.
That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home.. Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family. That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story.
They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, then they were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for+him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.
After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life lie. This was the only lie I said to you --- the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication!
I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything.. Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth : I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste.. But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again".
Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her: "what's the taste of salty coffee?"
"It's sweet", She replied.
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Jul 26 2006 : 10:23:29 PM
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Nice story, Near. i love stories like that.
When I saw the title, though I was expecting an exciting story about someone being sent to an asylum. oh well, love story instead. . . |
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Maximus
India
187 Posts |
Posted - Jul 27 2006 : 06:36:26 AM
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| I don't know what this thread has to do with yoga, but the truth is that attractive women don't like nice guys. Sexy bad guys only attract them. |
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Scott
USA
969 Posts |
Posted - Jul 27 2006 : 11:11:31 AM
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Maximus,
You must be kidding. "Attractive women", like all women, like guys that are straightforward and unafraid. By "nice guys", you are saying "liars, wusses, weasels". No one likes a person that hides their true feelings, because what is there to like? You have nothing to work with. How could a woman trust a man who is too scared to go in for a kiss, or ask her out on a date? Maybe in the future, he'll be too scared to protect her from a real bad guy. He would just cower in the corner. And no one likes a person that weasels their way through whatever situation...basically an untrustable person. Someone who is shady. The fact is that the "sexy bad guy" seems to be the only honest person in this world, so of course he is attractive. But it generally turns out that bad guys aren't the best choice, so you never really see an attractive woman that STAYS with a bad guy. They usually beat the woman, or go to jail and leave her as a single mother.
I've seen many attractive women with seemingly normal guys, who aren't bad or sexy...just confident about who they are. I've seen many unintelligent, gross women with sexy bad guys. I very rarely see a very beautiful smart girl with a bad guy.
The trick is being absolutely sure about who you are and what you do.
Anyway, Near, it was a good story. Sorry to go off topic. |
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Maximus
India
187 Posts |
Posted - Jul 28 2006 : 02:33:03 AM
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This will be my last post on this off topic thread. I agree with Scott. Just want to add that sexy bad guys attract women not because of their abusive quality but because of their confidence and not caring for what others think about them, which are attractive qualities. You don't have to be 'bad' to attract women but got to have those qualities that attract them.
The story posted by Near must be a fake one because a guy lacking so much in confidence could not have attracted the kind of woman who is always being pursued by guys , because he is not even one among them, definitely not ahead of them, but far behind them.
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Lili
Netherlands
372 Posts |
Posted - Jul 28 2006 : 06:49:24 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Maximus
This will be my last post on this off topic thread. I agree with Scott. Just want to add that sexy bad guys attract women not because of their abusive quality but because of their confidence and not caring for what others think about them, which are attractive qualities.
Come on - can't women be attracted to anyone just because they look good? Why do you have to make up multiple-layered personality-related stories just to cover up that women like good-looking guys just like men like pretty women. |
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Scott
USA
969 Posts |
Posted - Jul 28 2006 : 09:40:28 AM
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Maximus,
Some crazy things happen in this world. Sometimes attraction doesn't make any sense. I've seen some mind boggling stuff, like the most pursued women being attracted to ugly guys completely lacking confidence. Of course it only happens like .01% of the time but this whole dating and mating thing isn't an exact science.
And Lili,
No, women aren't allowed to be attracted to people just because they look good. It's against the rules. |
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Lili
Netherlands
372 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 04:13:54 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Scott
And Lili,
No, women aren't allowed to be attracted to people just because they look good. It's against the rules.
It seems to happen anyway at least to me and a lot of girls I know - sorry  |
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Alvin Chan
Hong Kong
407 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 05:06:28 AM
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quote:
And Lili,
No, women aren't allowed to be attracted to people just because they look good. It's against the rules.
Are you kidding, Scott? Men or women, the most immediate and powerful means of seduction is appearance. Not that the relations would be long and secure, though.
Scott, before going to a party, try dressing better and have a good hair cut (um.... this part is tricky. You got to have a good hair cut in women's eyes, not in yours) You will see what I mean. |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 06:27:43 AM
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Ha Ha
My 17 year old son just gave me a lecture on the importance of SHOES in the appearance stakes.
He said it tells a huge amount about a person. Apparently my shoes are laced up old man shoes and it does'nt matter how smooth and groovey I try to look when I'm going out, my shoes tell it all. 
So off now to the shops to get a nice pair of Jesus sandles and brown socks - what do you think?
Alvin, he also talked about the hair cut, I guess if we look after the extremeties the rest will look after itself.
Of course the most important thing that will attract a partner is the inner peace and silence that exudes from us, as a result of regular practice   |
Edited by - Sparkle on Jul 29 2006 06:35:19 AM |
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Alexander
27 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 07:32:31 AM
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i like the story
maybe you read my thread - there i wrote that i was interested in NLP and speed seduction sopme time ago.
speed seduction is a system, where you manipulate women in the direction you want. for me it didn'T feel good, so i never did it in the real world and just learned it at home. i had the weapon but i never used it.
another form of speed seduction is called natural game or pickup. the most normal guys can turn into women-seducing monsters if they manage their inner game. appearance plays a role, but a much smaller than everyone thinks.
a wonderfully handsome guy may attract women at first, but if he has not got the qualities a woman is longing for, it won'T be a long and fullfilling relationship.
like others said above, the most attractive qualities are confidence (NOT arrogance)and not caring about what others think or say about you. you have to know and like what you are and what you do. you shouldn'T have a minor doubt about anything you do.
from a spiritual viewpoint this also makes sense. i think most of you know the cosmic laws. what you think and your image of yourself creates your reality. if you think you can't talk towomen and so on, that's your reality. but if you are confident and know that you can do anything, you won't have problems. it's all about your inner game.
the outside is only a reflection of your inside.
so, like sparkle said, daily practice produces all those qualities.
namasté, i love you all |
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Alvin Chan
Hong Kong
407 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 07:36:49 AM
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A funny discussion that gives me a true smile
quote:
Of course the most important thing that will attract a partner is the inner peace and silence that exudes from us, as a result of regular practice
I am not sure about that.... may be in the long run, inner peace and silence is useful. But for immediate result, anything above our neck is the most important. At least that's my understanding and experience |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 11:57:49 AM
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From a guy point of view, perhaps the girls can confirm, the Metro Sexual image is in vogue.
This of course gives one a hugh advantage when practicing the AYP system. The practice of meditation associated with tantra practice done in a spiritual and loving way would surely draw the partner you would be interested in.
So Alvin, perhaps connecting sexuality with spirituality in a real way would be inviting even in the short term? |
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Alvin Chan
Hong Kong
407 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 12:33:24 PM
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quote:
So Alvin, perhaps connecting sexuality with spirituality in a real way would be inviting even in the short term?
Sure. We still have to use our mouth even in love at the first glance. So the next to our appearance is our voice, and then our gesture. Then and only then, the content. (unless you convey that you're a billionaire ). Frankly, if you can radiate some spirituality in addition to the above(which I think is very hard in the short term), it would certainly help.
That much for fun. Frankly, I don't think a deep relationship would build up BECAUSE OF our appearance. But at the same time I'm not so sure about the role spirituality would play in romantic love. Although a relationship can certainly be spiritual, I don't think spirituality can help with seduction. A spiritual guy is more likely to have life-long, stable kind of relations; but more unlikely to have many girlfriends.(unless you're bad guru who made use of your guru status, but then are you spiritual??) That's my observation on real-life people. |
Edited by - Alvin Chan on Jul 29 2006 12:41:34 PM |
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Scott
USA
969 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 12:42:36 PM
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Alvin,
quote:
Are you kidding, Scott?
I was just kidding around with Lili.
quote:
Men or women, the most immediate and powerful means of seduction is appearance. Not that the relations would be long and secure, though.
Scott, before going to a party, try dressing better and have a good hair cut (um.... this part is tricky. You got to have a good hair cut in women's eyes, not in yours) You will see what I mean.
While that would definitely get some attention, I don't think it's as powerful as being confident in who you are. The two combined, of course, is great...but if you aren't a straightforward person about what you want, regardless of how you look you'll be turned down.
I'm not the type to do these kinds of things, though. Like change my appearance to attract someone. Although I feel lonely quite a bit of the time, I don't feel the need to try to attract girls. I mean, I do get quite a bit of looks already (even throwing on my dad's old clothes, slipping on some cheap sandals, having stubble on my face and buzzing my own head)..but all of these looks are meaningless to me. I wish they meant something. I guess I'm looking for love, or at least a close friend who I can spend my time with, and not just attracting girls.
There's too much crap to wade through when you go on dates.
Also, Alexander is dead on in my opinion. If you go out to parties and look at all of the other guys there, you'll soon realize that they all look the same. They're all boring. Girls may flirt with them because that's all there is, and they may go home with them, but I think they're bored with it. I'm bored. What's not boring is people showing who they really are, and being unafraid of doing it. I'm attracted to the same things that I say girls are attracted to - confidence and straightforwardness.
I truly believe that everyone is actually looking for love. Some people hide it, by being the party goer type. "Woo hoo!" They may lie to themselves and everyone else about it...but it seems to be a deep desire in anyone and everyone. Maybe I'm wrong, and it's just my upbringing which makes me feel this need to find someone. If I'm right, then I wish everyone could be honest and get what they want instead of playing games.
Of course, playing games is a lot more fun than being honest.
To people thinking about mixing yoga with sex...beware! Both of these things are serious. You can break hearts. Always remember to do the right thing in the world. Do to others what you would want others to do to you, and don't do to others what you wouldn't want others to have done to you.
I had a one night stand with a girl, Jessica, this past year, and I was too stupid to know what was right in front of my face - someone seeking love. I attracted her, lured her, and used her. I treated her poorly afterwards, and now all I can do is wish the best for her. I don't know where she is now. I wish I would've recognized what I was doing. It seems she had her heart broken many times, and she opened up to me, just to have it broken again. It was not worth it. I hope I always remember this mistake, so I never do it again.
Be very careful about what you do in this world! Things we take lightly now have serious consequences later. A single word to someone can change the course of their entire life.
Hopefully all of our words and actions cause goodness to flourish .
-Scott |
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Scott
USA
969 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 12:45:16 PM
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Oh, I just saw this:
quote:
A spiritual guy is more likely to have life-long, stable kind of relations; but more unlikely to have many girlfriends.(unless you're bad guru who made use of your guru status, but then are you spiritual??)
I'm a pretty spiritual guy (although not a guru at all), and I haven't had many long term stable relationships at all. I've had quite a few girlfriends. My friend, who is very unspiritual, has only had two very long term girlfriends. |
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Alexander
27 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 2:18:37 PM
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i once read a book by terry pratchett. one sentence touched me deeply:
" if someone shines, then he even shines through seven layers of dirt".
i'm 17 years old and most of my friends want to have girlfriends and have sex. their relationships are short and most times without real love and sometimes even without respect. a friend of mine asked me "ya know where my bitch is?". in my opinion that's not the meaning of a relationship.
i always wanted to have many diferent girlfirends, i wanted to be the best, the most handsome and the ultimate alpha man. later i found out that everything was due to my ego , which needed a lot of attention.
now i don't search, i'm not interested in superficial girls who search brad pitt or orlando bloom. i'm not interested in changing myself to be attractive for others. if i am what i really am (or at least i try it - it's not always easy) i am me. thenn i can love me, because i know who i really am. if i love me it doesn'T matter if i am with girls or not. i always have at least one person that loves me
the funniest thing is, that i became so confident that i - in most situations - do things without thinking about the reaction of others.
you have to be like you are, because if you change yourself fpr everyone you meet, you forget about your true nature. i have a completely average hair cut, yet most girls say that it looks good. but that doesn'T matter to me, because i like the hair cut, you know?
just do what you feel good with, because it's the only thing that matters.
it's like a painter. he paints something and he likes it. many people may hate it or say it's nothing special, but for him it is. he loves it. and there are many many people who are impressed by the painting and buy it for high prices. they would never have had the chance to buy it unless the painter had painted it. if he had believed the ones who considered his work bad he would never have earned the reward.
namasté, i love you all
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Anthem
1608 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 6:25:52 PM
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You may be 17 years old Alexander but you have wisdom well beyond your years! Welcome to AYP.
A
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2006 : 9:45:23 PM
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Normal guys certainly do go out with knock-out girls. The girls often take advantage of the vulnerable guy and string him along as a boy toy.
Guess how I know that?
Nobody has mentioned the most attractive quality of a person, and it doesn't matter if you are physically attractive or not. It's kind of a spin-off of confidence, but can be learned too: The person who is genuinely having a good time and smiling and laughing a lot!
If you are bubbling over with laughing energy, it's easy to attract people. |
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Alexander
27 Posts |
Posted - Jul 30 2006 : 06:25:33 AM
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@etherfish
the role of a boy toy is a result of changing oneself in the way the girl wants you to. i made this experience and it was not funny at all.
but that's a mental trap: we think nice guys get "abused" by women to be their toy and bad guys have the right to possess the girl.
this trap is quite mean because i forgot that i had been a nice guy with almost NO self-confidence.
have you ever heard women talking about bad guys? they say something like that: "oh he's so mean...blabla...he treats me like a dog". in general these relationships are relatively short. now we know that a bad guy without his bad attriobutes would be ideal. if you take a bad guy and subtract his bad behavior, what remains? answer: his confidence.
i completely agree with the second part of your post
@anthem: thank you |
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Nice Story about being committed
