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kami
USA
921 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 27 2013 : 1:05:04 PM
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Human interactions and relationships form that all-important arena where there is the greatest growth, the greatest joy and the greatest pain. No matter how evolved we think we are, it is in relationships we discover how evolved we really are. It is one thing to quote scripture or commune with divine beings, and another to commune here, in this plane with everyone that comes our way. As Ram Dass says, "If you think you are enlightened, go spend a weekend with your parents."
In my path, relationships have been the most illuminating teachers, unrelentingly showing me the truth about life in sometimes joyful and at other times painful ways. And the dynamics of relationships, albeit puzzling, can be largely understood by understanding the concept of "runanubandha", loosely translated as "karmic debt."
It is said that at the first interaction, manifested souls agree upon a contract. The fulfillment of this contract may take seconds or lifetimes. Hence, the "longer" contracts manifest as relationships with parents, grandparents, siblings and children (and may include the spouse or significant other). To fulfill these contracts, we take birth in specific families according to the "packet" of karma/vasanas that needs to be worked off in a lifetime (or many lifetimes). It is to fulfill contracts that we meet friends, lovers, acquaintances, co-workers.. No meeting is a coincidence. The "casual" encounter with a cash clerk, a passerby on the street, a seemingly wrong turn leading to a fatal face-off in a dark alley - all the result of karmic contracts being acted out.
With respect to intimate relationships - these begin and end according to previously agreed upon (and forgotten) contracts. When this is seen, a relationship that has run its course can be let go of gracefully. But this is easier said than done because the ego (which has no memory or perspective of the greater picture) falls into the trap of attachment to the person or relationship, thereby resisting the completion of the contract and becoming trapped in the vicious cycle of attachment, trying to "fix" it, being unsuccessful and shrinking in pain and grief.
Growing wisdom enables the differentiation between when to let go and when to work it out according to the agreements of karmic bonds. However, until we lovingly let go of the relationships that have fulfilled their purpose (which may remain unknown), it is impossible to grow into all-encompassing openness and love. Every relationship and encounter in my life is deeply honored for teaching and guiding me into this love.
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Jul 27 2013 : 2:11:02 PM
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| Yes. |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Jul 28 2013 : 08:10:21 AM
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| nice |
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whippoorwill
USA
450 Posts |
Posted - Jul 30 2013 : 08:35:50 AM
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bewell
1275 Posts |
Posted - Aug 01 2013 : 4:18:26 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by kami
As Ram Dass says, "If you think you are enlightened, go spend a weekend with your parents."
Thanks for your observations Kami
Enlightenment and parents.
Later this month, I will be at a joint reunion: the people invited include my mother and her six siblings and their families, and my father and his five siblings and their families. I'm the eldest grandchild on both sides. All my grandparents have died, and I feel spiritually connected to all of them. I have my daily yoga practices, and a fairly stable access to inner silence, but anticipating this reunion is testing this sense of who I am. I know that in intense social situations, my emotions are sometimes rather disorderly, and unexpected, and demonstrative. Even thinking about it brings up an Ugh feeling in my gut --a mix of divine longing and dread. I love my parents. I admire parts of their lives and their habits. I also have a strong feeling that my lifestyle and habits are different. Very quickly, this sense of having grown in inner silence starts to seem like an illusion when I think of being in that reunion. I seriously considered not going. But now the plan is to go. Samyama thought of the moment: meeting family in the light of grace?
Be
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Edited by - bewell on Aug 01 2013 4:19:00 PM |
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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Aug 01 2013 : 9:32:49 PM
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Totally resonates with me, Kami! The constant test I'm put into with relationships. Somedays I just want to run off to an ashram . But need to plough ahead.
Such a lovely post. It captures the inner dialogue that goes within me.
[ Sunyata |
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kami
USA
921 Posts |
Posted - Aug 02 2013 : 12:11:00 PM
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Thank you dear Bewell and Sunyata.
Bewell, that is exactly it - far easier to abide in silence while living alone. Nobody to question a damn thing! Add one person into the mix and suddenly words and concepts like "compromise" and "conflict" arise... Wish you peace and joy, always (((HUG)))
The last few days have been spent in a Vedanta retreat/camp, with ~800 others, most of whom subscribe to concepts that no longer make sense to me - blind worship/deference to an external guru, emphasis on Vedantic concepts without simultaneous cultivation of inner silence, mockery and fear of things like Kundalini, non-relational inquiry.. Gosh, such beauty to be here, constantly engaged in looking within, at any judgments that arise and fall, leaving only love behind. I can see all of that in myself, at some point in my path - we are no different from one another at all, at the core of it..
My husband wondered why I was going to this, since I had a "preview" of it.. I felt this would be the perfect opportunity to test my own growth. In every moment, I'm thankful to Yogani, for providing this radical approach here. Yes, it's radical - one only needs to see what goes on elsewhere to appreciate one's own home..
Much love. |
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riju
India
193 Posts |
Posted - Sep 27 2013 : 02:54:08 AM
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I am a grand father and have a vast family in the form of sons, daughters, grand daughters and sons.
I believe the human progress lies in the harmony of relationships.
I being wealthy, I and my wife (our 50th marriage anniversery)decided to invite all relations in one place and give them togetherness and 3 days luxury holiday. Many travelled more than 3000 km to join my family function
I booked 30 hotel rooms in anticipation. All went full and I had to hire two extra big bunglows.
KAMI DEAR I THINK I PASSED YOUR TEST WITH LAURALS.Still i consider my success say 85% and I have to work for 15% more. Effort is on. YES ONE'S SPIRITUAL PROGRESS SHOULD BE MEASURED BY HARMONY IN RELATIONSHIPS. |
Edited by - riju on Sep 27 2013 03:40:21 AM |
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Karmic contracts
