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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 02 2013 : 07:15:19 AM
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Hi, I've just joined this forum as something pretty horrendous is happening to me, and quite honestly I need a bit of help! I thought my kundalini was awakened as I used to getnnight terrors and strange chakra occurrences as kid, and have peactisedbchakra work and yoga my whole life. Im 26 now and have just tried opening my pubic chakra 2a, and while experimenting with my chakras I felt an uneasy sensation of something inside me shlifting away from my body. The next 2 days I went through hell, I felt like all my chakras were shutting down and I felt scared 2 sleep as I didn't know if I'd live through the night. I've grounded myself a little now, realigned my crown chakra. I felt like I was going insane. Literally. Is this awakening? I just need some advice and help. I'm still going through all this. At time I felt like my heart and sacral had shut down. I couldn't feel anything, love, desire, or even the will to live. Please get back to me if u have any info on what to do to help myself. Apologies for the grammar 2, I'm on a smart phone.
Edited by AYP forum for forum placement only. |
Edited by - AYPforum on Apr 02 2013 07:59:07 AM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2013 : 09:33:30 AM
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Hi 001zerozero.
Welcome to the forum,
Can you say more about what spiritual practices you have been doing up until now, and what you do at the moment?
In the meantime, go for a long walk and eat heavier food than you normally do. It will help you to get grounded and stabilized.
Christi |
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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2013 : 12:45:49 PM
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| Thanks for your reply! Well I've isolated the 'feeling' that's wrong. Imagine something bad happens and you feel shocked and grounded, but then you have a kind word from a friend or a hot chocolate - whatever - and you feel that 'oh, that's much better. I feel normal again.' Well I'm not getting that. I'm guessing it's a base chakra ailment, and working in my base helps momentarily, but then the spaced out shock feeling comes back within a minute. Is it possible to damage a chakra through experimentation? I was experimenting with the spin (apparently the base in men spins counterclockwise) and also absorbing issues in rider to deal with them (childhood security based issues). Is this perhaps kundalini awakening but my base is denying and resisting it? I heard you can have problems if that happens. The main part of experimentation I was doing was the neuromuscular link between tension and chakras. I may have activated some muscle that triggers the chakra to close off. The levator and coccygeous muscle groups were being trained. Also, chakra 2a has been massively activated and I'm feeling things I haven't felt in years, like real desire. Perhaps this chakra is skimming energy or distorting the base? I can see myself getting better eventually but I'm pretty scared of sleep 2nite. And it's like I'm not here. Seeing my partner as we have days off and have work again in a couple days so need 2 sort myself out as can't work like this. Thanks for listening and any advice would be much appreciated. I'll try eating heavy foods. The walk helped a little. |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2013 : 1:18:46 PM
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Hi 001zerozero,
Keep taking long walks, it will help a lot. Micromanaging chakras is never a good idea in my experience as we simply don't know what order they need to be activated in. It is much better to take a more global approach to awakening. Can you let me know what is happening with your crown chakra and what you mean by "realigning it"?
Also take a read of this leeson:
http://www.aypsite.org/69.html
One more question: have you been involved in any other spiritual practices in the past other than doing chakra activation work?
Christi |
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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2013 : 3:48:29 PM
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| Sorry time is short as staying with extended family. Crown chakra felt like it wasn't in my head, so I meditated and just before I literally went insane, I pushed it back or opened it or something and felt a little more like myself so I could sleep instead of shaking in bed lol. My heart's a little better now and I'm quite grounded, my vision was skipping every minute or so, but I'm getting better. Its fascinating the link some of what I've felt has with modern ailments like chronic fatigue and certain mental illnesses. The world's a bigger place and is more co connected than I think anyone realises. If only subtle energy work was on the national curriculum... anyway I'll keep u posted. Thank you for the help, it's one of the most important things in life when u have people there to help when u need it. This experience has made me more interested not less in chakras. Im not gonna experiment any more, but I am going to find out what all this means, and from that find out ways to help people (myself included lol). I'll post 2moro with updates. And in response 2 ur question I've done astral projection, telekinesis, telepathy, chi kung in addition to this chakra work. |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2013 : 5:04:52 PM
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Hi 001zerozero,
Yes, it looks like you are going through a kundalini awakening, and not a very pleasant one. It is what is called a premature kundalini awakening. If you can, try to keep your attention away from your crown chakra and don't do any more meditation for the time being. Both those things will only aggravate your situation.
When did you practice Chi Kung and how long for? Also did you practice the microcosmic orbit and if you did which route around the body did you use?
Christi |
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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2013 : 09:46:39 AM
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Only practised chi kung basic exercises, was many years ago so didn't do orbits... could have as I studied from a good book but honestly can't remember.
Ok so this is an interesting day. I felt a bit better but pretty much the same level ofsspaceyness today... until... the bus journey back, I started to feel more like myself around people. I for some reason felt like I could clench my chakras, so I did that and felt like they clicked in2 place. INSTANT relief. Literally. The only way I can describe it is they were full of something that was pushing them too wide and diffuse, or perhaps that something was pushing my spirit outside my body. Now I feel like all my chakras work perfectly. Better than before. My base is harDer to click in and I still feel dizzy, but when I concentrate I can push it right back to where it's meant to be, and I feel instantly grounded. The only difference is that when I sit in the floor I'm swaying back and forth a bit. Has happened before. Tracing it back I now believe I've had an awakening when I was five due to trauma, which caused the same symptoms ok including night terrors, and a feeling of being bigger than my body. Bit personal but need 2 say so others can know... suffered lack of feeling when orgasming and erectile dysfunction including peyronies until this day. Now it's cured. I feel things I haven't since I was a kid, and I can say everythings at least 90 percent better to do with that. AnyIidea if it's meant to be pushed back in? I don't feel like I've stopped the awakening just the negative effects on chakras. |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2013 : 11:31:24 AM
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Hi 001zerozero,
Glad to hear you are feeling better. With a bit of basic grounding it doesn't take much to stabilize things.
I am not sure what you mean by "pushed back in" so i won't comment on that. As for the awakening, that will never stop. So you are on a journey now and you will have to work with the energy as it unfolds in your body. You would do well to read through some of the main lessons on this site starting here:
http://www.aypsite.org/10.html
It will give you a good understanding about what kundalini is and how it unfolds over time. The good news is that it is a journey of a lifetime leading eventually to a state of freedom and supreme joy.
On the sexual aspect you may find the tantra lessons of interest starting here:
http://www.aypsite.org/T1.html
They cover the same journey to enlightenment from a sexual angle.
For a while (at least a few weeks) leave out any chakra work, to give your system a chance to settle down and keep up with the grounding practices.
All the best
Christi |
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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2013 : 5:17:44 PM
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Hey! Ok I'm feeling pretty normal now, still feel a bit closed off in areas but have successfully worked on my base chakra (indirectly) and now have the feeling of inhabiting my body, which when it occurred about an hour ago literally physically felt like I'd jolted awake from a dream. I'm back in reality!
Firstly I'd like to apologise for my ranting and general afraid persona, I'm actually a very grounded guy usually. Secondly I'd like to thank you for your help, while it'sjust a ffew words on a screen it meant a lot to me to feel supported, so thanks.
Now I'd like to ask one more generalised question so I can understand the nitty-gritty of what actually happened. The thing that's confusing me is that like I said before, I thought I was already awakened. When I was preteen I had the same thing as this but worse, and grew up as an extremely spiritual person. I've had massive sucess with obe's, telekinesis, electrokinesis and telepathy, and was fairly sure I was awakened. So what on earth was this? Now I've calmed down I don't feel any different except for chakra 2a. After careful analysis I've realised that if it is kundalini, the symptoms are akin to each chakra shutting down and thenergy opening up more fully than before. E.g. now my sacral is pretty shut down for the moment, but when it does open it feels better than before. To me all kundalini seems to be is an extreme opening and closing of chakras. Maybe this is a form of cleansing? Maybe I have no concept of being unawakened in a basic sense as my first awakening happened when I was about five. (You may this this sounds a little silly but it's not. That's all I can say.) This is all conjecture but something doesn't add up if I take all this at face value. Any thought or random musings from anyone would be greatly appreciated. |
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Medea
Netherlands
115 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2013 : 02:11:02 AM
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Hi 001zerozero,
Glad you feel better! I'm afraid I can't help you with your questions since your approach of micro managing your chakras is very different from what AYP (the mediation system that is taught here) is about. Hopefully someone with some wider experience can chip in.
What is important now though is that you make sure you stay grounded, and that you minimize your practices to a level that feels comfortable. Then in time, you should be able to slowly increase practices again with (hopefully) no unpleasant side effects. Also what Christi said was correct: awakening does not have an end. It's an ongoing ever expanding experience.
Best to you! |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2013 : 04:31:11 AM
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Hi 001zerozero,
The awakening of kundalini is an ongoing process which can have some more dynamic phases and some less dynamic. It sounds to me like you experienced a shift into the subtle body, which would explain why you had a sense of not being in the physical any longer. It can be quite disturbing when it first happens. As the process of purification continues there will be a sense of chakras being more open at times and less open (or even closed) at other times. That could go on for a long time. Eventually you will feel that things are generally open most of the time, with an associated sense of ecstasy accompanying that.
One thing I would recommend is to develop a strong meditation practice. This will help you become established in qualities such as silence, equanimity, peace and freedom. It makes the whole journey much easier to navigate. In the higher stages of a kundalini awakening, those qualities come to the fore as kundalini becomes less and less about energy and more and more about freedom, in the highest sense of the word.
Christi |
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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2013 : 6:52:37 PM
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I have experienced one of the greatest moments of mg life.
I'll say what happened, some of you may not accept this but it's what I feel from what's happened to me, and that's all I can say. It's quite a journey so I'll say it as concise as possible.
After huge energy was pulsing through me for the day, I read something on lettingeemotion flood your lower chakras. I did this and felt incredible warmth and love in the lower 3. Im always analysing, trying to find what's happening - I realised what I was feeling was solely my emotional subtle body, and that during the kundalini I had been experiencing very few aspects of any of my bodies. I then co concentrated on my mental body. This flooded me with feelings that were normal. Butbi still wasn't properly myself. So I tried grounding my spiritual body. This worked perfectly and though it's still in the process of grounding, I now feel completely normal (most of the time) and realised something, kind of like an epiphany.
Whether kundalini is real or not, we are all fully enlightened already, and the crap we do in life and feel and think is just superficial. We do NOT have to change in any way in a deep biological spiritual sense, we simply have to understand what we already are. Thus was one of the greatest realizations I've ever had, and I can't describe it in words even a tenth of what the experience was like. And I'm a writer, ha! I once read something that may have been from Bruce lee, that we originate from something, move away, lose sight, understand our origin, and then return realising we are the same. It's not quite right but I can't find the quote. Basically, for me I have realised the path to enlightenment is realising and appreciating that I am already enlightened. We all are. It's seen all Iverson in small ways - like when a person buys thousands odds pounds of exercise equipment to get fit, when they can just go for a run. (Not a great metaphor but you get what I mean!)
Anyway I just had to share this. I'll post again when I've grounded my spirit body properly. Thank you all for your help!
Any advice I can give from all this pain and fear I've been through?
Love yourself, really love yourself, as you're already perfect.
Love to you all. (Not my usual thing to say but I kinda really mean it.) |
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001zerozero
United Kingdom
7 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2013 : 6:55:47 PM
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| P.s. apologies for the terrible smart phone grammar and predictive text! |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2013 : 7:07:35 PM
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Thank you for sharing!
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Apr 05 2013 : 05:21:32 AM
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Hi 001zerozero,
That's fantastic, thanks for sharing what you are going through. It is one of the divine paradoxes in yoga. Nothing is necessary in order to come to realize what is always already the case. And yet for many people a certain degree of purification has to happen before it is noticed.
Then, after the event, ongoing purification is also often needed for that realization to become a permanent abiding. So it is a journey that takes no time at all as it is always instantly available, and at the same time, it takes many years to fully unfold. One of my teachers uses the analogy of a tree growing. It is always a tree, but it is not until it comes to maturity that it begins to bear fruit.
All the best
Christi |
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URGENT HELP - Terrifying Awakening?
