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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 09:32:16 AM
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Dear Friends,
I need your advice on this. The issue is- I just can't stop talking about spirituality with friends and family .I feel that I might be annoying people with this.
When I'm invited to a party, it's better than when I have company at my place. The reason is I don't feel the need to keep people entertained. In such get together, the conversations are usually about current issues. These days I really don't feel the need to keep up with it. I just like to know enough and not worry about the details. I'll put in my two cents here and there. Still I manage to sneak in few spiritual talks. However, when I have company over at my place. I feel that it's my responsibility to keep them entertained. Some way or the other, I always end up talking about spirituality. I really don't want to be that annoying person. And, I love hanging out with my friends. But, I just can't help it.
Sunyata |
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Holy
796 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 6:23:31 PM
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Hi Sunyata,
it is natural to love talking about spirituality especially if it is still mainly a mindly happening, in other words still mainly based on mental information.
Over time, especially when effective spiritual practices happen daily over months and years, then "spirituality" start permeating the whole spectrum of body-mind from the subtlest to the grossest. And the pressure on "words" and importance on "talks about it" get more and more replaced by joy and bliss in every happening.
Here, in the beginning phases of reading countless books and webpages etc. A LOT Of talk and the need to explain to others, to talk with others about it, was really immense. Now for some years, whatever happens, especially whatever social happening happens, it gets more and more joyous for everyone and so much frees up for everyone and everyone is happy and content. The actual content of talks or whatever happens is so independant, the joy and bliss sneaks in through all, explodes in all ways, nothing and no topic stops it, even the other way round, whatever the "other" bodymind loves to talk about or loves to do, gets filled with joy and bliss and out of itself the good becomes visible for everyone. Everone sooner or later partakes in the joyous good, some take more minutes, some are instantly in.
The only important thing is to keep up the practice and this alone starts becoming a power where everything inside-out starts partaking more and more into a joyful transformation and purification just by getting more and more into contact with that body-mind that is practicing daily. There is no need not even to hint out spirituality and still more good happens than any amount of words could do. Then, sometime the time may come were the hint for the source of this joy is given and how to dive into it, so the hint for spiritual practice. But the theory will mostly annoy everyone and only may fruit in veeery few after many years into something like daily practice.
So happy praciting and no worry about what kind of words come out of the mouth :D The words may change over time and loose their intention of directing others into something about which you know not much and about which you will know nothing and understand nothing over the years anyway :P |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 6:37:23 PM
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I understand where that desire comes from, but it can actually be counterproductive. Your ego-mind can get caught up in generating patterns that try to express what can't be put into words, and that will distract you from the real thing. I've found what works much better for me is to not talk about it AT ALL! Then instead of being annoyed, people sense there is some kind of inner happiness and energy they don't understand, and that will catch their attention much better than talking about it.
Don't expect them to ask about it though; people will just be attracted to you and that's where you should leave it; most are not ready to make changes anyway. And you are right; they will get annoyed if you talk about it. I told my Christian friend "I have a very close relationship with God, but I don't believe in evangelism." He said "You're right; people don't want to hear that s@*t." |
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Goodway
USA
99 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 8:01:01 PM
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It is hard to be a spiritual-type and not feel compelled to talk about the stuff that is on your mind. I hope you feel liberated rather than crushed.
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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:18:42 PM
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Dear Holy,
Thank you for your kind response. Indeed this is just the beginning stages. I’m trying to incorporate all the aspects of my life but it’s difficult at this stage. With the volume of spiritual materials, I have been reading, it difficult to think/talk about other things. This is probably a phase and this too shall pass. It’s just that I don’t know how long. In the meantime I’ll just keep practicing my twice daily mediation. Honestly, I just like to be in the presence of friends minus the conversations and enjoy the moment.
Ether fish- Thank you for your advice. I’ll try harder not to talk about it at all.
Thanks, Good way. Hope I’m liberated soon.
Sunyata
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whippoorwill
USA
450 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:24:00 PM
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I sympathize. At least you're not afraid to talk about yoga and spirituality with your friends. I was a closet yogini until a few months ago because I didn't want to deal with the ribbing I was sure I would get. (I had to come out of the closet to advertise a retreat on Facebook. It turns out that the ribbing I feared never materialized. ) It sounds like your friends at least smile and nod politely.
But even so, when people want to discuss the topic of yoga and spirituality, they usually greet the topic with a great deal of enthusiasm. If your friends don't light up and start demanding to know all about it, or start talking about their own practice, I wouldn't recommend pushing the subject.
I'm in a situation where I don't talk about yoga (because my friends aren't into it) and my work doesn't make for good conversation, so I have to get a bit creative at gatherings. My husband is a crack amateur photographer. We pipe all his pictures to the Apple TV, and sometimes people get intrigued about this or that picture. A conversation sometimes starts about various places that people have visited, or about photography. We also talk about cooking or gardening or music or kids or museums or pets or their jobs or........ People generally like talking about themselves, so I just ask questions about what's going on in their lives, and they're more than happy to fill me in. I'm more than happy to hear it. That wonderful exchange between friends is spiritual all by itself. The spirituality part is felt rather than discussed -- if that makes any sense.
Still, there are times when I would give ANYTHING to be in the same room with someone who knows about these practices and who loves yoga and who is willing to listen to me blab about whatever. I recommend looking for an AYP group in your area or going to a retreat for that purpose. Tank up at a group meditation, and then the urge to get your friends involved will lessen. If they're curious, they'll ask.
Anyway, that's my free advice. Worth every penny!
P.S. I should have mentioned... Even though I haven't yet met any of the people who participate in these forums in person, they've become dear friends. The forum can be a good outlet for you as well.
All the best!
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Edited by - whippoorwill on Mar 04 2013 9:50:25 PM |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:24:22 PM
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LOL! Welcome to my world! My family has become well-acquainted with all my spiritual endeavors and interests. I've bombarded them with AYP missiles...hehehehe...
Just like any other practice, I have to apply self-pacing. I also ask silent questions and release them...like "Will this help them by actually discussing this certain topic--regardless of how fascinating it is to me?" This helps me balance the onslaught of spiritual obsession. Sometimes, it's good to just talk about "normal" things, but then again, isn't it ALL normal...by varying degrees of normality?! Isn't everything really just a manifestation of Spirit. So, I think we can discuss baseball, politics, the lizards in the yard, and even the most lofty abstract concepts of non-duality--with a spiritual undertone.
Good luck. I feel your pain 100%. The beast of bhakti has to be tamed. "Good little bhakti, good little bhakti," I say to her...then I feed her some inner silence and she calms down a little bit.
P.S. It helps to find "spiritual" friends. I have a few, and we can talk about all this stuff without worry or restraint. |
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kami
USA
921 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:36:09 PM
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Hi Sunyata,
Great advice from others already.
Nothing to worry about. It is all normal. It would be beneficial to find a core group of people to discuss all things "spiritual", as in sharing openings, dilemmas, practice related issues, etc. That way, you are not left wondering if you are forcing these things on everyone in your circle.
In any case, this is a very common thing, and as the inner silence grows, the need to talk about it diminishes. Just enjoy it. That would be my advice. Any time we try to be different than what we are being pushed toward, it causes friction and all kinds of mind activity, including whether it is good or bad. Going with the flow is the easiest way to navigate these things IMO. At the most, your friends get bored and change the topic.. No big deal.
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whippoorwill
USA
450 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:43:27 PM
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quote: Originally posted by Bodhi Tree
LOL! Welcome to my world! My family has become well-acquainted with all my spiritual endeavors and interests. I've bombarded them with AYP missiles...hehehehe...
My poor husband... He hears it all! He's not so much into yoga but, fortunately for me, he is into whatever is on my mind. I'm very lucky.
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:52:09 PM
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Whippoorwill, we posted within 22 seconds of each other too...synchronicity abounds in these forums... |
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whippoorwill
USA
450 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2013 : 9:54:39 PM
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quote: Originally posted by Bodhi Tree
Whippoorwill, we posted within 22 seconds of each other too...synchronicity abounds in these forums...
Cosmic coincidence? |
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Goodway
USA
99 Posts |
Posted - Mar 05 2013 : 12:17:21 PM
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quote: Originally posted by sunyata
Good way. Hope I’m liberated soon.
Maybe just liberate yourself for today?
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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2013 : 9:11:09 PM
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Whippoorwill- Thank You for the helpful tips. I’ve tried a few before. The group meditations that you hold conflict with my schedule .I would’ve loved to join. And, yes I’m so grateful to have found friends like you all in AYP.
Bodhi- You are hilarious!!! I’ve done the same to my hubby. He has to hear it all the time….lol (like Whippoorwill’s husband). I’ve been encouraging him to read the deep meditation. I do have some spiritual friends but they are all bhakti yogis. They don’t meditate. I have a great time connecting to my Ishta with them. In the beginning I only tried the bhakti part but once I started AYP-AYP brought me closer to him. My love for my ishta is overflowing.
As always Kami, thank you so much for the encouragement.
Thank You all my AYP friends!!!! Sunyata |
Edited by - sunyata on Mar 06 2013 9:25:31 PM |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Mar 19 2013 : 02:47:59 AM
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Ah..my family and friends have also 'suffered' greatly, esp. at the beginning. But slowly the need to talk about it is less but like mentioned finding an outlet with like-minded people is the best way to go.
Sey |
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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Mar 19 2013 : 8:41:44 PM
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Thank You for the advice SeySorciere. After posting in this forum and with the advice of all- I've been able to not mention spirituality for the past few weeks
Sunyata |
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