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Tam Phap
Canada
37 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2012 : 3:05:23 PM
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Greetings... if you have any suggestions for me, I would be most grateful...
I have been reading the support forums and came across a couple of fairly recent posts regarding kundalini syndrome. I am wondering if that is what I have been challenged with....
I am 60 years old and have been meditating (Zen) for over 25+ years as well as some non-duality and binaural beats. Last May/June I hit some very deep, blissful places... however, shortly thereafter I started having high anxiety and went into what I can only call a prolonged state of high anxiety that precipitated very bad insomnia - 5 + days at a time without sleep at a stretch with high pulse which went on for over 4 months or so. I also had other symptoms - seeing wavy lines, very enhanced sense of smell, ringing in the ears, sore neck, etc. After 4 months there was kind of a "crash" and I went into a deep depression. I have been digging myself slowly out of that since. The insomnia has abated and I have gained back most of my sense of humor and music activity which totally went out of the door for several months after the so-called "crash" when I was an emotional wasteland.
I am still working on the depression and anxiety... usually feel okay at night, but mornings and mid-days are fairly tough going. My Pranic Healling teacher says that my energetic system took a hit, and that I am very ungrounded.
If this is a kundalini surge, what do you suggest, as I have seem to have hit a bit of a plateau in as far as feeling a whole lot better. I was going on a meditation retreat next week, but have cancelled as my Pranic Healing teacher said that is that last thing I need right now. I guess lots of exercise and grounding??
Anything you can suggest would be most appreciated.
Thanks, Phil (Tam Phap) |
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mikkiji
USA
219 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2012 : 5:52:00 PM
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Phil, Also 60 here, 42 years of meditation, kundalini awakening 8 years ago, so let me be the first to put in my two cents. Whether this is some sort of energy surge or, as I suspect, the releasing of some very deeply rooted samskaras--sense-impressions which block the flow of prana, what we call "stresses" in the West--whether energy flow or release of stress, treatment is the same, and you have wisely taken first step--no retreat for now! Good idea. Other grounding activities are heavy physical exertion, orgasmic sex, and even eating some meats! Keep your daily meditation practices at a bare minimum for a while as well, and make sure your rest after you meditate--we're talking lie down for 5-10 minutes after a 5-10 minute meditation. Good luck. Michael |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2012 : 10:43:40 AM
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hello Phil what your pranic healing teacher is saying is totally correct....NO retreats ...and please stop your sitting practices now.... i had a serious exhausting overload in 2009 (i was doing yoga but NOT ayp) i was so sleepy i could not open my eyes ...stayed in bed like a corpse for few days... the mouth so dry...i was sweating like crazy...plus the depression,insomnia etc ...also the mornings were very tough... in 2009 the overload was triggered not only by too much yoga but also by my sadness about finding out that my mother had serious vascular dementia...
currently i am self pacing too due to a more or less minor overload...even it is "minor" still it is not pleasant at all...better to be wise and cut the practices
mikkiji gave u excellent ways to ground yourself
all the best!
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Edited by - maheswari on Jun 20 2012 2:15:37 PM |
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Tam Phap
Canada
37 Posts |
Posted - Jun 24 2012 : 3:48:35 PM
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Thank you Mikkiji and Maheswari! Yes, I was unsure at first whether or not to do the meditation retreat - 10 day silent intensive Anapanasati meditation - as it indicated that it could be helpful with depression and anxiety, but your replies make perfect sense and, even though I would love to get rid of this phase of suffering, I guess I just have to be patient and be kind to myself and see it through. Thanks again for your insight. Best wishes, Phil |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Jun 24 2012 : 4:00:14 PM
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dear Phil ...you are being wise and this is great! TGIY |
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jamuna
Australia
104 Posts |
Posted - Jun 25 2012 : 04:27:54 AM
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Hi Phil, I am sorry to hear about your uncomfortable symptoms. Going off what you have written though I think there are a lot of tools available for you to work with to help recovery and also some understanding of cause and effect that can be gathered from this community and from the free lessons available on the web site.
I have just gone through something very similar to what you have described with the difference that the duration has been much shorter (About 3 months). I had previously been an AYP practitioner and after a period of no practice went to a vipasana retreat and had an "overload" which basically describes any uncomfortable symptoms caused by excess or unbalanced spiritual practices. I experienced initial heightened clarity of all sensory perceptions followed by anxiety to panic attacks and then a prolonged period of high anxiety/ sleeplessness and later partial insomnia and difficulty sleeping followed by a stage of feeling flat. I also had continuing anxiety caused by the trauma and intensity of the initial experience.
Firstly it was a smart move in not going to the retreat. One of the core practices the AYP community engage in is 'self pacing' which is essentially reducing practices to ensure a more comfortable ride when need be. It relies on the recognition of cause and effect in practices and I recommend you search the lessons for self pacing if your not familiar with it. I think once you feel ready to practice again increasing your practice time by small increments starting with a short time is the best approach. All the while looking out for signs that may indicate overload and than backing off practices to increase comfort. It is also important to be aware of delayed results of practices.
To help ground myself after my overload I took on a broad range of lifestyle changes as well as implementing self pacing of spiritual practices. I followed the Ayurvedic recommendations for lifestyle and diet that would 'Pacify vata'. You might want to check with a practitioner if these changes are suitable for you. Vata imbalance is the cause of anxiety, fear, nervousness, sleeplessness and ungroundedness so this was the approach I took.
In general being more nurturing to yourself is helpful, I also found the following to help.
Eating warm nutritious food that was slightly heavier than normal at regular times. I added ghee to many food items to increase the heaviness.
Moderate exercise was good. I found too heavy exercise to be depleting, further stressing my sympathetic nervous system and also provoking my inner energies.
Avoid alcohol, caffeine and all stimulants including chocolate
Routine
Keep warm and enjoy relaxing company and especially the emotion Love.
These kinda sound simple and maybe a bit wishy washy but they made a big difference in getting me out of my fight or flight response to my inner energy. I also found that avoiding any fasting or even being late for a meal very helpful in preventing my energy from becoming ungrounded. Initially my metabolism was cranked right up and I even needed to wake in the night (hungry) to drink warm milk. I usually also had warm milk between every meal or anytime I was hungry. Also when I was really anxious and found it hard to stomach solid food I would also drink warm milk. If you also have lots of heat than yoghurt is cooler and heavier.
I also found that if my thought stream was escalating towards more and more fearful thoughts causing anxiety a cold shower cold help break the pattern.
I found social activity to be very grounding, talking with someone whilst walking in a relaxed frame of mind was very helpful.
I found most anything unhealthy to be ungrounding. I found that moderation in sexual activity to be good, excess would make me feel depleted, my mind more 'chatty' and energy rough whilst celibacy would cause my inner energy to increase to uncomfortable.
After I got on track with lifestyle I started inquiry into the validity of my anxious thoughts and am still doing that. I have also started experimenting with implementing a balanced spiritual practice that will sooth my inner energies over the long term, there is lots of info in the AYP lessons to assist you there. There is a known relationship between energy, inner silence and overload so some understanding of this may also be helpful.
I could write a bit more here but I'm running short on time. If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask. |
Edited by - jamuna on Jun 27 2012 8:18:12 PM |
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Shivadas
Norway
4 Posts |
Posted - Jun 27 2012 : 07:59:19 AM
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Namaste, Phil,
from what you tell, I feel I have had similar experience as you. When you tell that you have been practicing zazen you have maybe adopted a vegetarian diet? I have been a vegetarian since -96 and after some years with similar symptoms as you describe I found out that I was lacking vitamin B-12 and D. Some of the symptoms of B-12 shortage can be hypersensivity (due to the effect on the nervous system), depression, exhaustion, irritability, anxiety. You have already gotten good advice from others concerning practice and self-pacing, so I just mention this as an apropos
Prem from Shivadas |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Jun 27 2012 : 1:16:17 PM
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if one is lacto vegetarian (ie vegetarian but consumes dairy products) than then there will be no deficiency in vitamin B12 nor D scientifically proven and speaking from experience |
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LittleTurtle
USA
342 Posts |
Posted - Jun 27 2012 : 2:02:23 PM
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jamuna, that was an excellent post. |
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jamuna
Australia
104 Posts |
Posted - Jun 27 2012 : 8:19:05 PM
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Tam Phap
Canada
37 Posts |
Posted - Jul 09 2012 : 02:13:30 AM
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Dear Friends,
Thanks again for all your support and advice. Something else that has just started up is a kind of burning, pin-pricking feelings that come and go at different places over my body, as well as itching on either side of the nostrils. I am going to see an Ayurvedic Doctor next weekend, so we'll see how that goes. I guess the thing I am having most problem with is the ongoing depression and (negative) obsessive thoughts which add to the anxiety. This has precipitated a lot of weeping that includes almost like surges of energy release that rise from the solar plexus. This is really crazy as there really isn't anything wrong in my life, so I get frustrated that my mood is so whacked out right now. I guess it just comes as a result of the original trauma that started a year ago as mentioned in my first post. Unfortunately the standard doctor put me on antidepressant and anti-anxiety medications which I believe aren't helping too much in the long run.
Many thanks, Phil |
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kevincann
USA
335 Posts |
Posted - Jul 15 2012 : 2:44:02 PM
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quote: Originally posted by Tam Phap
Dear Friends,
Thanks again for all your support and advice. Something else that has just started up is a kind of burning, pin-pricking feelings that come and go at different places over my body, as well as itching on either side of the nostrils. I am going to see an Ayurvedic Doctor next weekend, so we'll see how that goes. I guess the thing I am having most problem with is the ongoing depression and (negative) obsessive thoughts which add to the anxiety. This has precipitated a lot of weeping that includes almost like surges of energy release that rise from the solar plexus. This is really crazy as there really isn't anything wrong in my life, so I get frustrated that my mood is so whacked out right now. I guess it just comes as a result of the original trauma that started a year ago as mentioned in my first post. Unfortunately the standard doctor put me on antidepressant and anti-anxiety medications which I believe aren't helping too much in the long run.
Many thanks, Phil
Friend,
This is just a short response; I'd need to have a long discussion with you to gather more facts which may be relevant.
In the general case, anxiety and depression in men who are having kundalini type symptoms are due to the following:
1) First and foremost, excessive sexual activity (or possibly any during the most active period) is the issue. If your hormones and other "precious substances" or Retas as it's called in some traditions are depleted, then your body will not be able to support Kundalini in a healthy fashion in your body; depression, anxiety and other negative psychological issues are the usual symptom.
2) These symptoms also might indicate a sympathetic/parasympathetic imbalance (mystics would say ida / pingala). I suspect that if you focus on rest, restoration and cold baths/showers, the excessive energy in 'pingala' will subside.
3) If it is fated for Kundalini to be active for you, no matter what you do, which may or may not be the case, the problem would be that you have not constructed a proper sushumna for Kundalini to use.
It is not common knowledge, but the sushumna (the so-called central column) barely exists for the beginner, and possibly even advanced meditator - it all depends on the type of meditation used.
If Kundalini is active, but has no healthy conduit to use, you will get these type of symptoms.
Now when you have imbalanced energy, the last thing you normally should do is meditate, contemplate, or stress out your system.
But for some, there is no choice but to do a skillful action, even if it involves gentle meditation; you need that well-formed sushumna.
I would recommend that you work with an AYP instructor and do some very gentle spinal breathing; this helps form the sushumna (the physical component being the somatosensory cortex in the brain).
I recommend living your life in a quiet, gentle and grounded fashion (spend more time outside day and night. Look at the stars. Love yourself and your family gently. Be kind to yourself and others. Have faith in your 'silent witness').
I wish you the very best,
Kev |
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