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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
 Posted - May 03 2011 : 6:17:30 PM
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Some days before my recent retreat in Italy I had a vision. It appeared on the right side of my head. It consisted of an arm bent at the elbow with the index finger and some of the third finger pointing upwards. The arm was all I saw...it looked like it was made of marble or some kind of greyish white stone.....I could not see the whole upper arm...it was somehow hidden....and there was nothing else to see either.
The vision carried a strong resonance with it........and so I knew something was about to happen, but as usual the only thing to do is to let it go. So I did.
Ever since last fall Francesco d'Assisi has come my way regularly...either through friends speaking about him or inner flashes and visions or seeing statues of him when I travelled or meeting people called Francesco. So ...when going to Italy I planned to go with some of the people that were traveling to Assisi on the last day of the retreat. However, the day before I was ment to go I remembered that I had packed a film somebody had reccomended to me about Francesco and his life and work. I never saw it and thought "now would be a good idea to watch it". So I did.
A few minutes into the movie there is a scene where Francesco discovers the horrific conditions under which his father's employees work (dying wools and textiles) - he sees how much human suffering there is behind the accumulation of wealth in his family. He finds the oldest man among the workers...takes him by the hand and leads him outdoors where he can rest.
As soon as he took him by the hand......I fell deep inside while still watching, and I knew I was not going to Assisi. I saw all of Francesco's message in the way his hand met with that of the old man. That was it. It stopped being about Francesco right there and then.
So instead, my partner and I ventured into the hills of Tuscany and spent a whole day roaming around in the beauty of the trees, the donkeys, the bridges, the churches, the wells, the birds, the flowers and the closed churches in the area. All day we walked.....and finished with a magnificent simple meal in Arcidosso. And some red wine. We walked home in the darkness of the night up the hills outside Arcidosso.
2 days later I found myself in Rome. On Good Friday. Last year in Ireland was the first Good Friday in more than 10 years that was not filled with painful sensations, visions and heavy emotional purification. So being in Rome on that day seemed significant somehow....yet I had no idea why and was not thinking about these things as the day progressed.
From our hotel room a rather unusual building and a dome some kilometers away attracted our attention. So we just set out walking towards it....and eventually ended up in front of a chapel/church. I front of it....guarding it on the top of some stairs, were two huge white/greyish statues of St. Paul and St. Peter. I felt a magnetic pull from the one to the left...and when finally facing it I looked up and instantly recognized the arm with the pointing fingers from my vision.....I saw why the upper arm was hidden....it was his clothing that partly covered it....I stood there for a long time before daring to go inside the church...
Once inside.... I fell into the deep unknowing inside. The resonance of the voice of the priest talking to the people attending the sermon was astonishing. He spoke in Italian...I do not speak Italian...but all the same I understood all his words. The words were not important however....only the resonance of his voice. I sat down......and after I don't know how long..... resurfaced when I heard a voice inside say: "It is finished". It is finished......it is finished.....I opened my eyes and instantly knew what was ment.
In that moment my attachments to all Ishtas permanently dissolved. Jesus, Krishna, Buddha, The Beloved.....they all dissolved. In that dissolving the light shone brighter in the room and I recognized the Christ essence in the presence. Earlier ...when this has happened.....I have always stood in a relationship to it. It has always been a subject/object experience. But this time.....this was all there was. Everywhere this was. There was no self in this seeing, so I cannot say that "I was it". It was more like "it is it and that is all there is".
It was the loss of a personal God.....the loss of the duality in love.
The instant the seeing took place it was let go of. And an immense dark peace that has not left since.... took its place.
Walking out of the church...something strange happened. As we came out...passing under the "roof" of the tall door.....two sounds started to vibrate. It was the sound of something bird like....yet not at all birds. The sound was incredibly loud and penetrating.....and so immensely beautiful my heart was touched to the limit of its capacity. The two unseen "birds" continued to "thrill" and "sing"...shifting and changing around each other. Like spirits happily rejoicing. All of the space was filled with the immensity of the sounds...yet to my astonishment noone seemed to notice. Several people were there. Noone even looked up. My partner however, stopped dead. He heard it too.
I told of this happening to a seer friend at home in Oslo. She immediately said they were "the gate keepers". I had never heard such an expression, and I still do not know.....but the joy and penetrating vibration of those spirits...I'll never forget.
Anyway.....
This was just an experience. It was scenery. But I felt like sharing it here...because it is such a profound shift. For a devotional type like me......finding my bearings in the gap between the human and the divine has not been easy. Integrating the ongoing experience of Oneness takes time, and ishtas have been Grace. But now.....that too is gone. And what is left....is not a nothing. Neither is it a something.
But here it is. Whatever was once on the cross is now off it. And it is everywhere.
As with all shifts....the eye is adjusting to this new seeing. So there is immense power insisting: "See!" "See!".
There is also a knowing that the unknowing has come to stay.....
Other than this life goes on as usual, and that is very very good.
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2011 : 6:23:07 PM
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Mmmmmmmmmmmm... oh so beautiful my dear Katrine!!!!
My experience was not so dramatic, but I am sure the feeling of lightness and immense peace is very much the same. Thank you.
http://the-journey-inward.blogspot....w-ishta.html |
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faileforever
USA
190 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2011 : 6:33:32 PM
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WOW! that's beautiful Katrine and has left me with goosebumps, thank you so much for sharing. |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2011 : 6:38:00 PM
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Hi Shanti
Thank you for bringing that post back up - it is lovely to read :)
Yes - the feeling of peace is the same. It is dark that peace. I know it not.
For me it is not so much that stillness or peace is the focal point. There seems to be no focal point. The strange thing is that it seems this shifts makes one thing crystal clear:
It is all about doing.
He he......am laughing....because that is the last I expected.
Going from doing....to being...and then ending up with doing after all.
How humorous Life is
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2011 : 6:39:40 PM
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Hi failforever
I am glad I shared it then
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2011 : 9:58:43 PM
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Thank you Katrine for sharing this with us.
What I find most touching about this posting is not the words... it is more the "tone" or the, ummmmm..... I don't know. Something. I dig it.
Thank you
Love!
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2011 : 10:28:31 PM
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| Thank you for sharing with us Katrine. I need to go to those exact places in Italy now to see if those things will happen to me. . .Ha ha just kidding. I love reading your stories. |
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - May 04 2011 : 02:43:43 AM
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Thank you for sharing dear Katrine and also Dear Shanti
namaste |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2516 Posts |
Posted - May 04 2011 : 04:32:50 AM
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beautiful..thank you for sharing
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miguel
Spain
1197 Posts |
Posted - May 04 2011 : 04:36:28 AM
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| Thanks for sharing katrine. |
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cosmic
USA
821 Posts |
Posted - May 04 2011 : 12:20:19 PM
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Deeply beautiful. Life is so magical. Thank you for taking the time to share this, Katrine
Lots of Love
cosmic |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 04 2011 : 5:17:06 PM
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Isn't it ironic that so many religions seem to promote attachment to one ishta to the masses? But then, it can do a lot of good for people if it creates bhakti.
I used to think maybe i was trying to manipulate God, or I was negligent because I would feel intense love and devotion sometimes, and then I would forget about it and just live my life.
But now I think that's OK. |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2516 Posts |
Posted - May 05 2011 : 02:54:22 AM
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this is the tunnel vision of relgions (all of them)...Etherfish..
that is why yoga is do beautiful...it is beyond all those man made systems... |
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yogani
USA
5201 Posts |
Posted - May 05 2011 : 08:14:00 AM
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I believe it was Sai Baba who said, "It is good to be born in a religion, but not so good to die in one."
The guru is in you.
PS: Lovely sharing of openings, Katrine. Thank you.
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maheswari
Lebanon
2516 Posts |
Posted - May 06 2011 : 04:55:50 AM
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Dear Yogani
nice quote |
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BuddhiHermit
United Kingdom
84 Posts |
Posted - May 08 2011 : 3:44:15 PM
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Thank you for sharing Katrine.
Ahh, The beauty of Truth in motion.
Namaste |
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kevincann
USA
335 Posts |
Posted - May 08 2011 : 4:14:42 PM
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Is it not true, that when the existence or non-existence of God becomes
irrelevant, that this is in fact the truest form of worship? That in the
end, an Ishta will poison one? How lovely the story you told Katrine. |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 08 2011 : 4:29:26 PM
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| You still need devotion to a formless Ishta beyond words - don't ask me to teach that! |
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kevincann
USA
335 Posts |
Posted - May 08 2011 : 4:35:07 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Etherfish
You still need devotion to a formless Ishta beyond words - don't ask me to teach that!
Is not devotion to the flow of life, no matter the form or it's timing,
through all moments, both happy and sad, both extraordinary and ordinary,
the formless Ishta beyond words? |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 08 2011 : 4:41:09 PM
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| IDK - I don't think so. That's a good focus for action & service, but I think there is more than life, and I think you have to focus your devotion outside the illusion itself. |
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kevincann
USA
335 Posts |
Posted - May 10 2011 : 02:29:08 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Etherfish
IDK - I don't think so. That's a good focus for action & service, but I think there is more than life, and I think you have to focus your devotion outside the illusion itself.
If a thing can be dissolved into unity, is it maya? Or was it of the same essence
as unity before it was ever pondered? Does non-dualistic pondering do the dissolving?
Or was it already dissolved, and the non-dualistic thought caused the scales to fall
from the eyes? If the latter, there never was a separation of unmanifest from
manifest, and the illusion was a perceptual choice, not a factual state.
I want to hear your considered thought process.
Namaste,
Kevin Cann |
Edited by - kevincann on May 10 2011 02:31:54 AM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - May 10 2011 : 6:33:03 PM
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I don't contemplate those things; I think you are fooling yourself with things like "non-dualistic pondering" and "non-dualistic thought". Pondering and thought are dualistic, and no choice of words or concepts can change that.
Better to follow the lessons or books, meditate twice a day for a long time, then tell us what it has done for you. That's the purpose of the forums. |
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kevincann
USA
335 Posts |
Posted - May 10 2011 : 6:42:37 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Etherfish
I don't contemplate those things; I think you are fooling yourself with things like "non-dualistic pondering" and "non-dualistic thought". Pondering and thought are dualistic, and no choice of words or concepts can change that.
Better to follow the lessons or books, meditate twice a day for a long time, then tell us what it has done for you. That's the purpose of the forums.
Thank you kindly for your input.
Namaste,
Kevin Cann |
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Chiron
Russia
397 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2011 : 04:20:42 AM
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The nameless behind the names.. the formless behind the forms. One becomes peaceful after they've been through enough chaos. One can also be good at talking with paradoxes and still miss it :)
Relaxing..
Breath in.. love
breath out.. gratitude
thank you all
the mind tends to need its idols.. but as long as the heart knows the truth and the infinite keeps pushing our limits... |
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marcplatters
USA
10 Posts |
Posted - Jul 29 2011 : 4:21:24 PM
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Thank you for sharing Katrine.
I truly believe it was Sai Baba who said, "It is good to be born in a religion, but not so good to die in one."
The guru is in you. |
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Dissolving of attachments to Ishtas
