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WSH
USA
38 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 16 2011 : 1:58:00 PM
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Hello,
I am making this post because I am having some difficulty with my emotions and uncomfortable body sensations. I am wondering if this is a result of kundalini energies running amuck throughout my body and if so what I can do about it.
First a little background. Things seem to be running smooth for a time. After a break for a while from the AYP system I had worked back up to a general level of practice. Doing ten minutes of spinal breathing pranayama and 20 minutes of DM. This was comfortable and did not seem to be causing any problems.
I then decided to add mulubandha. The first time I did this I had rather strong pulsating sensations at the perineum and strong arousal. I had to lie down for a while after the sitting practices to stabilize the energy, because I felt shaky. These new sensations did not bother me though in fact it was quite pleasurable.
I continued to do the same level of practice for a time and now often in addition to the pulsating at the perineum I would get body jerks while doing SB, usually about half way up or half way down. This did not really cause me a great deal of concern or discomfort; I assumed it was just blocked energy. In addition my normal life outside of the practices seemed to be running smooth.
So with this I decided to add sambhavi to my practice. This really caused the activity at the perineum to increase as well as the arousal, which would carry over into the DM so much so that I would even have an occasional orgasm. This I did not like. It was a huge distraction. It should be noted that I had been doing siddhasana for a long time. This just happened to be the most confortable way for me to sit doing the practices. So with that being said I continued to do everything accept I cut out siddhasana during DM because I found the level of arousal to be way to distracting.
At this point I continued to get body jerks and pulsating at the perineum but in addition I would have an aching sensation at the perineum outside of the practices as well as body jerks. I also started to have mild burning sensations at the level of my sternum radiating to the right side of my chest.
I became concerned at this point about my health so I went to the doctor. Since then numerous test have been run as well as a referral to a gastroenterologist who performed even more test. They have not been able to find anything wrong with me and my doctor recommended psychological help.
The thing is, is that I have always at least in my mind been fairly stable emotionally and with my mental health so I have not taking that route yet.
So with all this going on I scaled back on the practices again for a time, just doing 5 minutes of SB and 10 minutes of DM without the siddhasana because I did not like the level of arousal it provoked. Things seem to stabilize a bit but I was still having body jerks and occasional aching at the perineum outside of the practices. Again I increased my level of practice back to doing 10 minutes SB with siddhasana, mulubandha and sambhavi along with 20 minutes DM. Things again became to intense at least with the arousal and perineum issues. So I quit doing everything all together and this is where I am at today.
Even with all these practices I have never experienced this inner bliss people talk about. No ecstatic surges of enegy up and down the spine,no visions, sounds, lights or anything all that pleasurable. I have found when the practices were going well a little more peace in my life, which is enough, however as the practices continue they seem to lead to more suffering than joy?
Currently I am having body jerks, mild burning sensations moving to different parts of my body (usually it feels like a mild burning at the surface of my skin which becomes highly sensitive to touch), occasional aching at the perineum, chest pain at the sternum level radiating to the right side of my chest. At one point my kidneys were aching but that went away, occasional anxiety,occasional shallow breathing, fatigue, anger issues lack of appetite, depression and helplessness. Today the top of my head is mildly burning.
So, I don’t know what to do. Is this a health issue or a Kundalini issue? All things I have studied says kundalini, but what am I supposed to do about it. I read Yogini’s lesson 69 and am trying those approaches. I am again doing 5 minutes of SB and 10 minutes DM, nothing else. No siddhasana, mulubandha or sambhavi. I am also taking a long rest period after the practices.
Should I quit doing everything all together or by doing a light practice will things hopefully stabilize? If so how long does it take to smoothe things out? It is very hard for me to do nothing and in fact it often makes me feel physically worse.I have a tremendous amount of bhakti and even with all the discomfort I feel like I should go on. However I don’t want to hurt myself in the process and to be honest this sucks! Any help or advice would be tremendously appreciated.
Heartfelt thanks.
WSH
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Edited by - WSH on Apr 17 2011 12:04:38 AM |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2011 : 09:15:33 AM
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Sounds like kundalini to me.
Have you read this lesson?
http://www.aypsite.org/367.html
Cut off spinal breathing for a bit. Try the longer mantra:
For those over-sensitive meditators who would like to try slowing down the rate of transcendence, the third enhancement of the AYP mantra is suggested. It is:
SHREE OM SHREE OM I AM I AM NAMAH NAMAH
Don't do any energy practices (which I think you said you don't do). Do some vigorous exercises, swim, walk, jog, weights. Eat heavier for a bit. Do things that will ground you.
Hope some of this helps. |
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WSH
USA
38 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2011 : 12:51:17 PM
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Hi Shanti,
Thank you. I will take to heart what you say. I am with you about the spinal breathing. I have found that SB usually has the effect of more instability when the energy flows are in excess. I was a little confused because in lesson 69 it was suggested to back off on the meditation while maintaining SB. I suppose it is different for everone. I am not sure if I read lesson 367 but I will take a look. I am very thankful you responded to my post, I am feeling a little lost right now.Thank you!
WSH |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2011 : 1:13:32 PM
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Yes, when there is an imbalance in energy we do recommend SPB. This helps clear out the spinal nerve that will help even out the energy. However, since you have too much energy, it may be better to take a break foom it a bit. You can do few rounds of alternate nostril breathing before meditation if you would like. Then after a few weeks, add just 4 or 5 rounds of spinal breathing and see how you feel.
If cutting back off spinal breathing does not help, then try what the lesson says, cut off meditation and do only 5 min spinal breathing. One of the 2 practices may be causing the overload, and the only way to be sure is to work with one at a time.
No reason to be lost... it is all apart of the process, good things are happening, we just have to figure out what works best for us, and you have been doing a great job of it.
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2011 : 1:19:58 PM
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| Lesson 69 doesn't say to stop meditation. It says back off on everything except SB and meditation, then possibly cut back on meditation time. |
Edited by - Etherfish on Apr 17 2011 1:21:53 PM |
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WSH
USA
38 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2011 : 9:36:05 PM
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Thank you both for your input and the kindness to reply.
Shanti, I did take a look at lesson 367. I had read it before but it did not seem relevant at the time. It seems very relevant now. I think with the help you have provided as well as what is availiable in lesson 69 and 367 that things will smoothe out.
I did a short 10 minute meditation this afternoon with just the breath as the meditation object and no mantra and things seem to go pretty smooth coming out. I did not do any SB. I have always been really sensative to excess energy flows when doing energy work, so I think backing off on the SB will help. I am still physically somewhat unconfortable, but it seems to be better without cultivating more energy flow. Thanks again.
WSH |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2011 : 9:58:53 PM
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| Great! Maybe try some heavy physical exercise too like Shanti says or gardening for grounding. |
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WSH
USA
38 Posts |
Posted - Apr 18 2011 : 10:46:23 AM
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Thanks Etherfish,
I am going to try. I am feeling a bit exhausted right now but I find when I am able to force myself to go for a run or do some moderately strenuous excercise that it helps. |
Edited by - WSH on Apr 18 2011 8:33:59 PM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Apr 18 2011 : 9:00:19 PM
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| Exercising makes you feel great, but you can ground yourself without expending energy. Lie down on the ground; walk barefoot on the earth, stick your bare feet in holes in the ground; run your hands through beach sand or dirt, get in ocean or lake water, hug a tree, touch plants, etc. |
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WSH
USA
38 Posts |
Posted - Apr 19 2011 : 11:13:15 PM
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| Thanks again Etherfish. It sounds like good advice. |
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Kundalini Imbalence?
