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inquiry
Canada
4 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 19 2010 : 11:35:12 AM
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Dear friends
Thank you for being here for sincere seekers... I need help to stay on the path that i choose for my spiritual growth...
I want to practice self inquiry consistently all the time for the rest of my life. Everytime i get disturbing thoughts and i do get a lot of them i start saying in my head " who i am? who i am? " and the thoughts go away.
But later in the day the thoughts come back... i have a very heavy past and i need to forget all about it as if it never happened... i really do not know where to start... |
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Sep 19 2010 : 12:17:05 PM
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Hi Inquiry, may i suggest reading the book Awareness by Anthony de Mello. It will facilitate the inquiry for you without all the labels and dots that come with it and wake you up some more from everything...
Even Sri Ramana Maharshi when he was asked of which is the best way to realize the Self, he said to keep awareness of the I. And yes the inquiry who am i leads to that, but it is not to be repeated like a mantra.
The way to do it is that when thoughts come up just ask to whom these thoughts arise and then you'll have the answer "I" to me myself you'll have self awareness.. Then you should ask who am i? and let the question go into silence and surrender because over then and there in the Now there's nothing in our hand that we can do...
Oh and i've been reading Eternity Now by Francis Lucille lately, it's a very clear book on the direct approach...
Yoganiji has also written a great book on the subject with healthy point on the subject of relational and non relational Self inquiry: http://www.aypsite.org/books.html#si
Love,
Ananda |
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Jo-self
USA
225 Posts |
Posted - Sep 19 2010 : 1:14:06 PM
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Inquiry:
If I may give my humble two cents. I suggest first becoming grounded in Self, by following a non-Inquiry path. First, Inquiry is given as a non-path path by certain teachers, however, many have had Gurus or other help. Also, many have practiced other disciplines prior to the "inquiry". And, the teaching of Inquiry, is itself a path, so how could it be a non-path to what is always the case? Too many contradictions.
Note also what Ananda wrote above. You must let the Inquiry go back to the Silence. Inquiry is like a dynamic mantra. In meditation the fixed mantra is the vehicle that inverts attention to its source and the change in the mantra leads to more silence being consciously experienced. In Inquiry, life serves to invert attention to its source. But, imho, only appropiate to monastic practice.
If I may continue, if you are having disturbing thoughts, no matter what type, there is either a philosophical or psychical problem in evidence. For that you should seek professional assistance. There is no shame in this, no one is perfect, but everyone is subject to the human pains of this life. No magic pills or mantras can erase the past. Sometimes we will just have to live with what is and just do better.
When young I lived next to the elevated subways trains. What a horrible noise. Yet, very soon I never heard them pass by. Psychic pain is like that, at first it is loud, but like all demons they recede into the background as a background hum. But, this is the point. Even if you forget the noise (stop having the thoughts) they are still there. In the subway noise case, there is damaging noise pollution that can even cause destructive stress, and in the case of thoughts, you can be under their sway and not even know it, like a tumor that never reveals itself until it is too late.
Yoga can be the way to burn these things away. But there are contraindications for doing it.
jo-self
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Edited by - Jo-self on Sep 19 2010 1:30:13 PM |
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inquiry
Canada
4 Posts |
Posted - Sep 20 2010 : 10:39:38 AM
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Thank you Ananda and Jo-self for taking the time to read my post and respond i am touched that you care about my well being.
I am trying to reach that point of silence and it is not coming easy too many disturbing thoughts are tugging in... mostly about all the mistakes i did in the past and what a horrible person i was and the terrible things i did...
I found as if there is two zones in my thinking one is very disturbing and the other one is peaceful and comforting... now i want to figure out a way to keep my mind all the time in the comforting zone that is why it is essential for me to be on a spiritual path.
Kindly yours |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Sep 20 2010 : 11:39:53 AM
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Hi Inquiry and welcome to the AYP forums! 
Before I say too much about your posts, can I ask you what your daily spiritual practices consist of? Are you practicing AYP Deep Meditation or another style of meditation that cultivates inner silence?
Love!
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Ananda
3115 Posts |
Posted - Sep 20 2010 : 11:47:04 AM
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Dear Inquiry, judging by your last post. It looks obvious now that Yogani's book on Self inquiry is what's best for you... and in case you're not practicing AYP's deep meditation yet then it's something worth trying out especially for cultivating inner silence...
Love,
Ananda |
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Tam Phap
Canada
37 Posts |
Posted - Sep 28 2010 : 1:12:32 PM
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Dear Inquiry,
Troublesome thoughts have, in the past, bothered me greatly as well. The way I tackled the issue was to embrace a simple statement that was apparently brought forth by Ajahn Sumedho during a dharma talk. It was simply "all thoughts are garbage". Profound!! So... everytime a bothersome thought came up, I would say "garbage" to myself and continue on. After some time, the thoughts dissipated into the nothingness from where they came and I started seeing the nature of thought. I highly recommend this practice. You can also check out the dharma talk presented by Ajahn Amaro, which is where I first heard of this - it is downloadable in mp3 format: http://www.abhayagiri.org/main/medium/866/
Best wishes! |
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inquiry
Canada
4 Posts |
Posted - Oct 02 2010 : 11:34:56 PM
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Thank you Tam Phap i tried to listen to the talk but the IP had some conflict. Yes i get a lot of help out of Buddhis t teaching.
Now i came across the idea of no locality and non duality teachings as in "Russell Targ on Limitless Mind and the End of Suffering" A guide to fearless living!
That was quite the eye opener for me... now i am not sure who is having those negative thoughts anymore.
Kindly yours! |
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