AYP Public Forum
AYP Public Forum
AYP Home | Main Lessons | Tantra Lessons | AYP Plus | Retreats | AYP Books
Profile | Register | Active Topics | Members | Forum FAQ | Search
Username:
Password:
Save Password
Forgot your Password?

 All Forums
 AYPsite.org Forum
 Jnana Yoga/Self-Inquiry - Advaita (Non-Duality)
 Awareness!
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Printer Friendly
Previous Page | Next Page
Author Previous Topic Topic Next Topic
Page: of 3

Sparkle

Ireland
1457 Posts

Posted - Mar 24 2009 :  09:19:26 AM  Show Profile  Visit Sparkle's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi ananda

A couple of days ago I was pleasantly surprised to to find the book Awarenwss by Anthony de Mello in the middle of one of the kids bookshelfs. I thought I had given it away a while back.
I bought it many years ago and didn't really get into it then but now - as you say it is springing to life in my hands - wonderful stuff and pure advaita
Highly recommended and thanks for the reminder

Edited by - Sparkle on Mar 24 2009 09:26:21 AM
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Mar 24 2009 :  12:12:11 PM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
namaste brother Sparkle,

glad to do the honors and everything happens in due time as i'm sure you know.

warmest regards,

Ananda

p.s: the stuff on that book are from a workshop done in new york and they are available via audio recording on the net and they are the only ones which father Tony allowed recording.
Go to Top of Page

IcedEarth

73 Posts

Posted - Apr 03 2009 :  11:32:56 PM  Show Profile  Visit IcedEarth's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
interesting book... I ran across it a couple of years ago in my Mom's collection of books. It was a bit of an awakener, but it is hard in earlier stages of spiritual development to have someone tell you so upfront about what reality is.
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Apr 04 2009 :  10:56:38 AM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
hi IcedEarth,

i totally agree with you and here is the role of deep meditation to prepare us for such a straight forward self enquiry.

love,

Ananda
Go to Top of Page

Parallax

USA
348 Posts

Posted - Apr 19 2009 :  6:18:05 PM  Show Profile  Visit Parallax's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Ananda,

I'm half way through the book and love it. His stories are great and I love his sense of humor. This is a real gem. Thanks again.

Peace & Namaste
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Apr 20 2009 :  08:55:04 AM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
hi Parallax,

good to hear that you benefited this much; some of my other friends have really benefited a great deal from this book and i still do recommend it heartily.

take care bro.,

Ananda
Go to Top of Page

Anthem

1608 Posts

Posted - May 06 2009 :  2:47:13 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thank you Ananda and Shanti for the introduction to Anthony De Mello. I downloaded his free audio tracks and have really enjoyed listening to him, a very remarkable speaker!
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - May 06 2009 :  4:34:58 PM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
you are most welcome dear Anthem.

love
Go to Top of Page

Konchok Ösel Dorje

USA
545 Posts

Posted - May 07 2009 :  7:38:02 PM  Show Profile  Visit Konchok Ösel Dorje's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Awareness is the key that unlocks your inner Buddha.
Go to Top of Page

JDas

USA
74 Posts

Posted - May 10 2009 :  06:06:13 AM  Show Profile  Visit JDas's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
All those gurus!! Flavors galore! Makes my mind crazy. Good words, nice words, soothing words. But makes me realize much to my chagrin that the guru is in me, not them. they might give me a nice feeling, a momentary arrest of the suffering, but the answers are not from without, but from within. this rocks, doesn't it??!!

quote:
Originally posted by Holy


My favorites are [url= http://www.here-now-tv.com/index.php?id=110]Samarpan[/url] , [url= http://www.here-now-tv.com/index.php?id=122]Maitreya Ishwara[/url], [url= http://www.here-now-tv.com/index.php?id=127]Gangaji[/url], [url= http://www.here-now-tv.com/index.php?id=172]Papaji[/url]. They are some more, but they mostly don't have any English translation. The vids on the site are mostly belingual with English and German. Watching one or two in weeks or months always gave me some special hint that was perfect for that moment in time. Seems like it's the same with your book. Also books like -the power of now- come like a hammer on your head =)

Go to Top of Page

miguel

Spain
1197 Posts

Posted - May 10 2009 :  12:55:32 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi JDas.

quote:
But makes me realize much to my chagrin that the guru is in me, not them


It is good,doesnt it JDas?

quote:
the answers are not from without, but from within


They are like a finger pointing at the moon.They are only a bridge between your mind and your real self.
Hope it helps a little.
Of course,the guru is in you.


Edited by - miguel on May 10 2009 1:46:49 PM
Go to Top of Page

AYPforum

351 Posts

Posted - May 20 2009 :  10:30:30 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Moderator note: Topic moved for better placement
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Jul 26 2009 :  01:20:39 AM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Awareness, awareness, awareness

it really works my brothers and sisters.
Go to Top of Page

emc

2072 Posts

Posted - Jul 26 2009 :  7:38:09 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I have just managed to come out from a weekend intense with Mooji, visiting London. Awareness, huh? Made me wonder... a lot of people got up there and claimed to not only sense the nothingness but to be as nothingness... I didn't feel very much stillness or energies from more than one of those up there, who got the place go really deep... Was it mostly pretence from their side, or is it possible to go into full Oneness as Awareness and not have your kundalini going? It seemed so strange, but that's of course only from the perspective of my own experience, that one can be able to go into that Awareness beyond consciousness (=stillness in action, witness state) and not have any energetics or other experiences going with it... nobody spoke of bliss, beauty or love or seeing myself everywhere, oneness, being the Ocean or the other stuff I experienced, and that others report of frequently here... just "nothing"... and perhaps Joy and peace... beyond the sense of I AM... Hm...

And he did speak about people who have had clarity, but have fallen back to mind identity (I, d entity)... that the next jump over to clarity might not be perceived as the time before... That made me wonder if I might have built extreme expectations based on my former switch of identity of what it's like, and are dismissing anything that is not anything like that? Do you see what I mean? But then I see that's a ridiculous thought, since Home is probably instantly known as Home when at Home as Home no matter what... hahaha! He also spoke of someone who had had clarity, but too soon, had a lot of sh*t bubbling up afterwards, patterns taking over, and jumping into clarity again... and so forth, and eventually Mooji saw that she was just addicted to getting the high of awakening... then he quit bothering about her... That scared me properly, I tell ya... there might be "hopeless cases" sort of... just saw myself being that miserable case for eons of time...

Mooji was a hoot, though! Really nice guy! Great to see him holding the totality, after only having seen the short clips on youtube.

For me, it was mostly a test to see how the new grounding would hold in that environment. It worked very well, compared to before! I only flipped once, minor flight, over in a few secs, and luckily with crown downwards and not upwards, and that's when he said "Some beings are so tired of experiences..." and I didn't really hear the rest... hahahaha! Must be this being, then! I thought my bhakti would get spurred, but didn't seem to work like that this time. We'll see where it goes from here. I came out of it more convinced than ever that I am so far only into non-relational inquiry and keeping up the self-inquiry in order to find and identify with awareness will take a great initial effort from the mind-identity until it sets off in any relational one, going easier and easier by itself, as both Mooji and Yogani explains. And right now, I'm far too lazy to put any effort into the spiritual journey at all... (I see a trillion Agent Smiths and I give up immediately.)


Edited by - emc on Jul 26 2009 7:53:16 PM
Go to Top of Page

christiane

Lebanon
319 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  12:20:21 AM  Show Profile  Visit christiane's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
ahhh...expectations and lazy bhakti!
maybe it's a phase that has its own teachings..
Sometimes, the 'spiritual taste' comes back
through a tiny unexpected event..
Meanwhile, awareness awareness ..
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  02:06:11 AM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
sweet emc, thk you for sharing some of the fruits of your wkend with mooji.

just reading that post of yours made me think wow this lady is going way too much in and off mind patterns... that makes a person very tired chill out a bit...

i personally do experience a lot of the energetic stuff and ecstasy but to be honest they seem to be just experiences and i don't care much about them nowadays no matter what the amount of ecstasy is.

where as with awareness\stillness it's clarity of mind plus peace and relaxation sort of a fresh breath of air.

all i can say to you is just be quiet and don't identify with your thoughts just be still be aware and let that samyama thingy take over.. just let go..

darn it i feel like one of those guys who are speaking with others from another planet nowadays and i don't mean you here emc.

oh and in case you haven't you should read this book by Anthony De Mello it will shake u up and you seem like someone who needs some shaking up and spicing and i hope that you are still taking your dose of daily practices "DM in precise."

and concerning them expectations well if you keep on having them and building on them in your thought well that's where you'll lead yourself "the way you think you become" so why not think happy thoughts you'll become a mooji yourself in time don't worry about that just let go and enjoy the present moment it's all we have.

love u sista,

Ananda
Go to Top of Page

emc

2072 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  05:17:20 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks, Christiane and Ananda.

Thanks for advice, but that's just jada jada, you know. I understand you mean well, it's just all you say have been said from this person too to others for so long, it's pointless having it coming in. The knowing of it is there, the ability to live it is not.

quote:
just reading that post of yours made me think wow this lady is going way too much in and off mind patterns... that makes a person very tired

You got it! I hate this journey, going from the deepest Nothingness to stubborn mind, in and out like a maniac. Wouldn't wish it for my worst enemy. I guess I'm the only one who can cope with this sh*t, and that's why I was considerate enough to save you all from getting this lot. The first day I met Mooji, I was in openness - just being love, spaceous, peaceful. He passed by, gave me a hug, big smile and said "Great, great, very great". The next day, Agent Smith had the grip, strongly having a mental chaos inside... Mooji spotted me, came up and asked how I was and gave me the greatest stabilizing love boost...

Don't have any wish to read anything. It's just to practice to stay aware that's left, and I don't have the inclination or ability to do that at the moment.

quote:
if you keep on having them and building on them in your thought well that's where you'll lead yourself "the way you think you become"


I know. See where the despair comes from? I'm done. I'm smoked. The journey is going backwards here due to that. I could just as well quit it all and wait for evolution to highten the frequency of this consciousness and let others do the job of having it happen slightly faster...
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  05:35:09 AM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
i've been where u're at before emc, nothing to do but surrender.

just let go of the quest and all of those mind games for now and things will take care of themselves.

just relax and live your life enjoy the normal stuff give yourself a break and instead of satsangs go to a spa or...

just take a break
Go to Top of Page

emc

2072 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  06:31:52 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks, ananda. I feel your good intention and am grateful for your kind words! Unfortunately, there has never been any enjoyment of anything ever here. This negativity is the normal (mind) state. I came out of my mothers womb and refused to eat for the first five years of my life, and the protest has been going on ever since... (which is interesting, because a baby IS still Oneness, before conditioning hits it, and this being just didn't like to keep the body going from the start... they had to force feed me).
Go to Top of Page

christiane

Lebanon
319 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  6:36:22 PM  Show Profile  Visit christiane's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Dear emc...

I know you don't feel like reading .. but I cannot but say 1 or 2 things here..simply coz I was feeling exactly the same way you are now, for the past 3 weeks or so..until today..
One thing is for sure: there is NO journey going backwards..
I used to wonder about that, but this is only an illusion, maybe due to unfulfilled expectations (and frustration as a consequence).
I can talk from my recent - still fresh! - experience..
What Ananda said (and sure you've heard it millions of times) is true..
only surrender with awareness as much as you can.
One thing I really learnt today, a few hours ago, is that YOU CANNOT MAKE IT HAPPEN.
The more desperately you want it, the harder it will be to get..
It can only happen.
And that's what happened to me today..
It's been a while I couldn't read, not a single word without my hand scratching my chick or nose, or playing with my hair.. anything the mind will make you do when it refuses to collaborate.. and then, it's good to just drop the whole thing and do something you enjoy doing.. like a child, for no reason.. without putting effort into analyzing or thinking it 'spiritually'..
Just do basic things or do nothing, sleep, sing, cry, whatever..
and what has a beginning has an end (or a new beginning )
I can understand that hearing words like "go in", "don't get identified with the mind, etc.", etc. etc. feels like chinese even if we understand it intellectually..
When we are in the mind, this is how it feels..
Until.... 'something' happens, and the heart opens, and then, when you are in the heart, peacefully, (and here, there's no heat or ecstacy or any urge, simply peace, no mind, and neutrality, yet energy flowing from head to toe!)...when you are in the heart, automatically, you are above the mind, you are the master, and the mind becomes your precious servant, a silent quiet servant, and it becomes so much more powerful and steady..
Today, I experienced that state, in particular external/internal circumstances, and once in the heart, 'I' was (and still am) not existing anymore.. I felt like a vehicule with flowing energy moving inside, blood circulating everywhere and just this 'freshness' that is maybe similar to the one Ananda talked about..

Sorry, didn't want to write that much, but the hands are just flowing..

PS: maybe it will sound repetitive, but really, laughter and humor is a great joyful weapon against the negative unproductive mind.

Peace and Light...
Go to Top of Page

Kirtanman

USA
1651 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  8:35:08 PM  Show Profile  Visit Kirtanman's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by emc

I have just managed to come out from a weekend intense with Mooji, visiting London. Awareness, huh?

..

We'll see where it goes from here. I came out of it more convinced than ever that I am so far only into non-relational inquiry and keeping up the self-inquiry in order to find and identify with awareness will take a great initial effort from the mind-identity until it sets off in any relational one, going easier and easier by itself, as both Mooji and Yogani explains. And right now, I'm far too lazy to put any effort into the spiritual journey at all... (I see a trillion Agent Smiths and I give up immediately.)





Hi emc,

Have you considered that no thought has anything to do with any of this?

Awareness isn't a special awareness, or an enlightened awareness.

It's just awareness.

The awareness reading these words.

If you don't like the way the pen is writing, set it down.

You are the author; not the thoughts.

Reaction to thoughts is just more thought.

Hope this helps.



Heart Is Where The AUM Is,

Kirtanman
Go to Top of Page

Anthem

1608 Posts

Posted - Jul 27 2009 :  9:28:46 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I used to fret about the mind perpetually. "Dam the mind said such and such, how unenlightened I am, so much work to do to know or get to the truth" etc.

Nowadays, no more solving, fixing or strategies to improve the mind. The mind says many things, that's fine, it is all just mind. Mind can say "I need to fix that thought, it's so bad" but that's, mind too. It took a while for the realization to come that "the fixer thoughts" or the thoughts that talk about improvement etc. are mind too.

Overall, I enjoy what mind has to say because a- it can be funny and b- it helps me to know some of the thoughts that others have too, which is useful.

So what happens now? Just awareness of what is said. When the worrisome thought comes, see it, hear it, love mind for its effort on "my" behalf and then it goes until the next time it shows up and so on.

Great points Christiane, I agree, you can't make it happen. I's desire for self-realization can never be fulfilled, the very seeking prevents anything beyond glimpses. Total surrender to what Is, so that mind lets go (doing nothing), opens the way for right action to emerge uninhibited. This allows what "you" (me and everybody) are looking for to reveal itself as we accept that "I" can never find It.

Edited by - Anthem on Jul 27 2009 9:32:30 PM
Go to Top of Page

grihastha

USA
184 Posts

Posted - Jul 28 2009 :  09:35:09 AM  Show Profile  Visit grihastha's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi emc,

So sorry things are looking bleak.

I know you'll probably think, 'Oh no, not another ******* book!' But I've become a bit of a nutcase about Daniel Odier's 'Yoga Spandakarika,' which really opened the doors to a very different, relaxed, SIMPLE way of approaching Awareness. It's lovely...

Wishing you all the love,

gri
Go to Top of Page

Ananda

3115 Posts

Posted - Jul 28 2009 :  1:05:30 PM  Show Profile  Visit Ananda's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
hi again emc,

simply put relax for a while take things easy the bhakti will come back and don't feel sorry for yourself the past is past live in the now and work for change in it don't give up "good things come to those who persevere" i know that from direct experience and i've been through hell and back i'll tell you and the bhakti pierces through the heart like knifes some times here and at others it just isn't there and things will change i promise you that no escaping change as you know that's for sure.

i trust in the phoenix in you and in everyone.

namaste sweet emc,

Ananda
Go to Top of Page

emc

2072 Posts

Posted - Jul 28 2009 :  4:27:45 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Back from London, I find all your answers... Thank you, guys! I'm touched by your sincere attempts to cheer me up and give support!

I have noticed that these deep sh*t dips sometimes overwhelms me acutely, I buy in to them seriously (instead of having them like a radio in the background otherwise), not having a ghost of a chance even remembering what thoughts and emotions really are or how I usually handle them... like that information is not there and never has been! Then after a few days of emotional hell comes my period and I realize I must be affected by some PMS - which I've never had any problems with before, really. Since I never keep track of time, when I'm having my period, I forget these dips, so next time it's there as a surprise again... So... I'm already feeling better, and I guess you all sent some good vibes my way, which helped as well! Thanks!

quote:
Originally posted by christiane


One thing is for sure: there is NO journey going backwards..


No, the journey goes on, but it is possible to have been in an enlightened shift and then go back to living from a mind perspective again. I've done it, I have friends who have done it, and Mooji just confirmed how he eventually thought it was a waste of time to bother about those who flip in and out of clarity, never stabilizing and making that little effort that is needed to stay Home instead of believing the mind again. Adyashanti writes about such people, that they can go on and on for 20-30 years of these awakenings into Oneness and That, and still never get the trick of stabilizing... So... I'm just saying so far, I seem to have that type of pattern.

quote:
One thing I really learnt today, a few hours ago, is that YOU CANNOT MAKE IT HAPPEN.
The more desperately you want it, the harder it will be to get..
It can only happen.

I can understand that hearing words like "go in", "don't get identified with the mind, etc.", etc. etc. feels like chinese even if we understand it intellectually..
When we are in the mind, this is how it feels..
Until.... 'something' happens, and the heart opens, and then, when you are in the heart, peacefully, (and here, there's no heat or ecstacy or any urge, simply peace, no mind, and neutrality, yet energy flowing from head to toe!)...when you are in the heart, automatically, you are above the mind, you are the master, and the mind becomes your precious servant, a silent quiet servant, and it becomes so much more powerful and steady..
Today, I experienced that state, in particular external/internal circumstances, and once in the heart, 'I' was (and still am) not existing anymore.. I felt like a vehicule with flowing energy moving inside, blood circulating everywhere and just this 'freshness' that is maybe similar to the one Ananda talked about..


Christiane, this is beautiful, and I'm glad you have this shift going on! The thing is, I can only agree with you! Smile and nod. These are the shifts I'm talking about as well... in and out of this... a new sudden surrender, some time as peaceful being - no sign of "me" there, all ego-identity vanished and seen as fake, thoughts and emotions totally powerless - seen for what they are - going to awareness without objects (the Nothingness at it's core) in meditation etc etc etc (Just look at these poems coming out of this being sometimes http://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic....C_ID=3586...) I have said "I am That as This" and meant it! I agree! It's not that I don't know that shift. The curse of this being (whatever part of consciousness that is not in your bodies, but in this body), is then suddenly to start to believe a thought or a feeling again, identify with it and contract back into prison again, believing it and trying to find the ability to surrender again for a while until it happens again, by grace... And the "backward feeling" is there because these flips over to Oneness and Peace come more and more seldom with longer and longer periods of mind-hell in between.

It's actually like the mind has seen the shift so many times now, that it has become more skilled to prevent them? It knows how it is to be totally dismissed and loose its power and vanish, so it's not gonna let it happen that easily again...

It's rather fantastic that it's actually POSSIBLE to go into identifying with body-mind again after having it absolutely dissolved in Truth... being the Ocean and beyond, and then believing there's something like separation again... THAT is truly weird! But it's all about frequencies, isn't it? When you're not consciously living as the Now, the Now is not 'available' (please, don't say there's only Now and we can never be out of the Now! ) - only the vague memories of it and the knowings of it all... the mind filter IS there and therefore rules at its frequency. Awareness from a mind-frequency is "mind watching the mind" and non-relational, no?

So, I don't know if it's my projection, but I often get the feeling that people here on forum think I'm only talking from intellectual understanding of Oneness, that it's too unbelievable that someone might have tasted Freedom and then left it so thoroughly, descending into mind again, so it can't be from own direct experience? It seems people try to tell me what Freedom is like, instead of addressing the flip-flopping. (I'm just reading "An autobiography of a Yogi", Paramahansa Yogananda, and of course just came to a page where he describes his first "cosmic consciousness" experience, given by his guru, and how he finds it to be when he's back in mind again... Thank you Paramahansa for that book! It resonates greatly with my own journey filled with one increadible miracle after another)

Like the crucial point here, is when the first thought or emotion comes that "grabs" something that makes the contraction into density happen again and misidentification happens again, by habit somehow... that's the point where it seems to just go blank in the system and it goes faster and faster and *whoff* I'm back into mind.

quote:
When the worrisome thought comes, see it, hear it, love mind for its effort on "my" behalf and then it goes until the next time it shows up and so on.


This approach may work during the opening until suddenly a hook from the mind force comes and grabs attention/interest that starts shutting the system down, and I absolutely forget about this approach! "emc" reappears and is in control again...

It's a bloody mess going on here! And that's where I sort of pick up the message from many realized sages, that it DOES take some effort there, in that particular point, to stay aware by some kind of will or choice, until it goes more and more automatic. I seem to be totally a seed for the wind, that blows around with any mind trigger that comes! It's like there is some laziness or hidden wish that stability will eventually just happen by itself, while I do start to believe that there is some type of effort in staying aware with WILL, by conscious choice, that has to take place right at that point when temptation to fall back into mind appears - and it will appear since patterns/mind force are designed to shut the doors... And I think we are all different there, that some will indeed get it served on a plate (to stabilize), and others will have to practice more intensely to build a habit of having the INTEREST in Truth instead of anything else, whatever it may be in those crucial points... And that willingness to make that effort is driven by bhakti! And bhakti is what is fading due to these endless, fruitless shifts...

Edited by - emc on Jul 28 2009 5:00:10 PM
Go to Top of Page
Page: of 3 Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  
Previous Page | Next Page
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Printer Friendly
Jump To:
AYP Public Forum © Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) Go To Top Of Page
This page was generated in 0.06 seconds. Snitz Forums 2000