|
|
 |
|
| Author |
 Topic  |
|
lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 30 2017 : 11:50:18 PM
|
| I'm glad you are still here. Haven't heard from you in a while. Keep going! |
 |
|
|
lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Dec 31 2017 : 02:47:27 AM
|
I wrote a whole poem to dogboy. It had bad words. He would have loved it. It wouldn't have been approved. |
|
|
|
lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Dec 31 2017 : 02:55:20 AM
|
| Bliss is approved, but problems are a problem of the person, which it's all person problems. Nothingness, which I keep going back to, well no problems there. But it's a big split. It's a super big split from what's happening in front of me. |
|
|
|
Dogboy
USA
2296 Posts |
Posted - Dec 31 2017 : 2:16:57 PM
|
|
|
|
|
Radharani
USA
843 Posts |
Posted - Mar 21 2018 : 02:36:08 AM
|
If I may offer my 2 cents here: relationships suck! They are very difficult. That's why C.S. Lewis said God uses relationships to "wear off our rough edges" when there is friction. The celibate life is so much easier.
There are times when I want to run away from home, but where would I go? And who would take care of the animals and my partner? He is a good, kind, spiritual man, a natural yogi, and we love each other greatly. Our spiritual life is awesome, but we struggle to keep a roof over our heads. He has ASD, for which he self-medicates with alcohol, and massive child support, legal and medical debts, and cannot hold down a decent job, primarily due to ASD and "communication breakdowns" with bosses and coworkers. His family has continual drama and they hate me for some reason; allegedly, I "took all of his [nonexistent] money," while in fact I've been supporting us the last 13 years. Had I known the baggage he was carrying when we first got together, we would have been monogamous tantric lovers but not domestic partners with our finances entangled... Isn't hindsight wonderful?!
As for the idea of "staying together for the sake of the kids," as a counselor I want to caution that it's not always the best thing, especially when there is a lot of hostility between the parents. When mom and dad are unhappy, hostile, abusive and at each others' throats, even small children can pick up on that energy. It gives them an unhealthy view of relationships and marriage. Martyrdom - sacrificing your own happiness by remaining in a miserable marriage - will win you praise but may not be in the best interest of anyone involved, including the kids. In a toxic marriage that doesn't improve with family therapy, sometimes moms and dads can be better parents by not staying married. I have clients in both situations.
Ultimately, you know what is best for you and your family. The rest of us can only support you in your decisions and be here for you during hard times. Much Love to you. 
|
|
|
|
lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Mar 21 2018 : 11:07:09 AM
|
Jamie,
You are awesome. Lots of love. |
|
|
|
Radharani
USA
843 Posts |
Posted - Mar 22 2018 : 02:25:25 AM
|
quote:
Originally posted by lalow33
Jamie,
You are awesome. Lots of love.
Right back at ya dear. |
|
|
|
capucine
France
66 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2018 : 06:44:24 AM
|
I agree 1000% with Radharani. Lalow, I don’t know your story, situation etc. I speak here just from my story.
When I was very young my parents stayed together, but they were very unhappy and finished to divorce. I had some illness in relationship with these situation, just picked up this bad energy even I didn’t really understand the situation. Today, I always have some health aftermaths.
From my experience, don’t think to stay with your husband without love (even without quarrels in front of your children) is good for your children. 100% wrong, I lived it. It’s not good for them. Bad energy is here.
I don’t know if you do that, but don’t say to your children that their father is bad and that they have to hate him. It’s better to let them have their own think/opinion/judgement. Even if you are not agree with them.
Explain them the situation clearly.
Good luck.
|
|
|
|
Dennis
USA
83 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2018 : 01:18:48 AM
|
Dr Phil said it's better for children to be from a broken home than in a broken home.
Good advice.
|
|
|
|
Radharani
USA
843 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2018 : 01:24:16 AM
|
quote:
Originally posted by Dennis
Dr Phil said it's better for children to be from a broken home than in a broken home.
Good advice.
I'm not a fan of Dr. Phil but I totally agree with him on this. |
|
|
|
SheriGoddart33
USA
3 Posts |
Posted - Apr 23 2020 : 10:08:06 AM
|
I think this is a smart move to get away from such a man. Not many women are capable of this. The main thing is to be strong and respect yourself
|
|
|
|
Topic |
|
|
|
| AYP Public Forum |
© Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) |
|
|
|
|
Left husband
