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Chard
250 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 17 2017 : 12:17:04 PM
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Hi everyone, I wanted to get feedback on the million dollar question I've had for years...
So right after I gave birth to my first son in 2009 I left a nice cushy job that paid well with good benefits that I didn't really like though. After trying to conceive for 1 1/2 yrs I was really present to how my children are a gift from God and that it was an honor and spiritual duty to be there fully physically when they were really young- babywearing, long-term nursing etc. it was such a joy and I'll never regret those years of making the choice to opt not to go back to work full time and only work about 4-6 hours a week doing work I absolutely LOVE. Yet my husband disagreed w my choice to stay home - he wanted me to go back to work full-time and it was/has been a big point of contention...he's had to pick up the slack and we had many years of tears regarding financial instability and his resentment. Yet in my heart I felt I was where God wanted me to be. I was fully present to my children in the early years of mothering and no matter what sacrifices we made it was still worth it. Somehow we got through and the silver lining was all the lessons around money and financial savviness I felt he and I both acquired. But it took a toll on my marriage as we did not share that same value.
So now as we move to CA and my youngest is 3 1/2 and will be in school til 2 at the same school conveniently as his brother (which leaves me a big chunk of time to work more) the question is do I can the work I LOVE that brings me joy to find a job with benefits that is high paying and give my husband more of a break or continue building my work (now I'll have more time to really be out there marketing myself hopefully and taking on more clients, and even thinking out of the box with my work).
This seems like the universal dilemma does it not? Job A that we love versus job B that pays the bills. Clearly, I need to transform my limited view and step into abundance mentality that I can do my work I love and it be prosperous as well! Hmm I think I may have answered my question! Lol! Love to hear your feedback though  
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Edited by - Chard on Jul 17 2017 12:19:55 PM |
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jusmail
India
491 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2017 : 7:27:13 PM
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| Children who are 4 and younger are prone to frequent illness. So you may have to be with them at home for many days if and when they fall sick. Also, the move to another part of the country, how will it affect the kids is yet to be known. So watch out for that too. Be flexible is what I am hinting at. |
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Chard
250 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2017 : 10:42:08 PM
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You are so right Justmail! Young kids do get sick a lot and between that and school holidays it can be tough to consistently work sometimes. Yes I've been reflecting also in how this change is going to affect them. Last time I was visiting where we are moving with my 7 yr old and he was crying a lot saying he doesn't want to move and so I just comforted him and held the space for him to cry. Also, my 3 year old who hasn't had behavioral issues has been having some lately at camp so I know on an energetic level at least they are both feeling it. So my priority now is just supporting them and keeping things simple and as stable as possible during this time and prepare them for what's going to be happening. It's heartbreaking through to witness their grief but kids are way more resilient than adults so I know they will adjust.
I also realized after posting that it doesn't have to be all or nothing...I will likely look to supplement my work with maybe 5-10 hrs of a part-time job just to ground ourselves here. This has all been a leap of faith but I know it will all unfold as it should. Blessings and thank you Justmail! Love to hear others responses! |
Edited by - Chard on Jul 17 2017 10:55:34 PM |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Jul 18 2017 : 01:56:38 AM
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Hi chard,
quote:
Clearly, I need to transform my limited view and step into abundance mentality that I can do my work I love and it be prosperous as well! Hmm I think I may have answered my question!
In spirituality is everything a paradox. We can ask ourselves, how do I find the work I love, but at the same time we can ask ourselves how do we find love in all that is need to be done.
Next to our daily practice It could be helpful at the end of the day, to write 5 things down which we are grateful for that happened that day.
If we have a desire to change jobs or other aspects in life, we can take small steps in that direction, look around, take a course, connect with people with the same interest. Stay in the moment, don't built castles in the air.
If we are parents, the children are of-course our greatest responsibility, they are dependent of us. Sometimes we see that responsibility in different ways, for instance mother feels she has to be around the children all day, and father feels a great responsibly to earn enough money, so that everyone could have what he or she think she needs. Don't forget that both is an act of love.
Do you practice samyama Chard?
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Chard
250 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2017 : 10:10:39 PM
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Charliedog, great feedback thank u! Yes I need to get back to doing a gratitude list! I love how I emphasize doing that with my clients and have neglected to do my own! Also I did Samyama for a few years and forgot about that too! So yes I'll do both! Thank u!  C |
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Jul 22 2017 : 12:01:58 AM
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Chard,
I've moved from my family(not as far as you will). I know it's rough, and you have to plan somethings. But all this planning takes you away from here( not really!?- you can't really go anywhere)
I wanted to say that. I'm not sure it's always kosher on this board. Simple, simple is the highest happiness, yet I know all to well that everything defies that. |
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Chard
250 Posts |
Posted - Jul 25 2017 : 10:21:28 PM
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| Thanks for the support Lalow33 |
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Chard
250 Posts |
Posted - Feb 08 2018 : 9:34:52 PM
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Hi All, So I'm tailspinning a bit about a work and would love some feedback from this spiritual community...
So we are adjusting to relocating to a new city and my husband still has his job on the east coast but it's not enough to cover our expenses. He has worked since he was literally 12 years old and really really needs a sabbatical from work wants the joy of spending more time with our kids- and I really believe that now that my kids are in school that I'm willing (not wanting) but willing to step up for our family and get a full-time job. I have not worked full-time in nearly 10 years and the work I do I love but we need one of us to be working full-time right now just to ground us here. I have a masters degree and I know that what I could earn would allow my husband to build his new company here and take a much needed break. It feels like something generous I want to do for our family and we need it.
Yet it means I'll have to more or less put my business on hold which breaks my heart and less time with my kids and for things in my own life. I feel so torn between love and duty (such a popular theme I see humans struggle with in different ways- as I'm reading Baghavad Gita). I'm also reminded that I can reassess how I feel after working for a time.
Now the clincher, the best paying job in my area in my profession happens to be working with men in prison. I happen to be as 39 year old blond woman whose "skin bag" could be more of a handicap in this job. I have spoken to people about the job and apparently its very safe and actually quite a "cushy" job and that people say I'll have alot of extra time to build my work that I love on the side. I've been meditating on idea and discussing it with people in my life and feel that professionally it would stretch me but having been in my profession for 15 years I think I could step up to the plate and offer something of value to this population. So I'm just letting this all marinade right now. I'd love all your feedback on this please Thank you!!
C |
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jusmail
India
491 Posts |
Posted - Feb 09 2018 : 08:20:21 AM
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| Share and shine your light upon them. Maybe that is what the universe is planning for. Good luck |
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parvati9
USA
587 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2018 : 7:21:30 PM
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Chard
Last night I was praying/ contemplating your question and received an odd answer: Have you ever considered a landscaping job (your own business)? ... getting products and plants from nurseries and home supply companies ... designing gardens, sectioning off areas for flowers, trees, gazebos, fountains, patios, landcover; utilizing pottery, stones, wind chimes etc. You would basically only need a business card and a vision to get started..
In your area there must be wealthy homeowners, and you might be a natural at it. This is confirmation of an answer received a while ago - that you would love working outside in a garden. You could visit a couple nurseries and see how you feel. In my area there is a gorgeous nursery, a very uplifting place to go in Spring and Summer; the employees and customers all seem to love it.
Instead of one well paying full-time job, how about several sort of well paying part-time jobs? As you build up client base, have good references and demand for the services, you would be able to charge more, maybe a lot more. Vatas usually enjoy being creative and working outdoors where they can move around in a natural setting.
love
parvati |
Edited by - parvati9 on Feb 10 2018 7:44:05 PM |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Feb 11 2018 : 03:25:51 AM
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Quote Chard,
quote:
Yet it means I'll have to more or less put my business on hold which breaks my heart and less time with my kids and for things in my own life. I feel so torn between love and duty (such a popular theme I see humans struggle with in different ways- as I'm reading Baghavad Gita). I'm also reminded that I can reassess how I feel after working for a time.
Now the clincher, the best paying job in my area in my profession happens to be working with men in prison. I happen to be as 39 year old blond woman whose "skin bag" could be more of a handicap in this job. I have spoken to people about the job and apparently its very safe and actually quite a "cushy" job and that people say I'll have alot of extra time to build my work that I love on the side. I've been meditating on idea and discussing it with people in my life and feel that professionally it would stretch me but having been in my profession for 15 years I think I could step up to the plate and offer something of value to this population. So I'm just letting this all marinade right now. I'd love all your feedback on this please Thank you!!
Hi Chard,
With this job opportunity you really get the chance to live a meaningful life. Talking about spiritual life, working life, familylife, love what we do etc. we divide ourselves. Spiritually seen it is all one. We have a journey to go. Remembering your job was in psychology? You can make such a big a difference with working with the men in prison. If you can see them from a place of stillness and be there for them, you will bring light in their lives.
It might be not easy at the start, but you are creative too, write beautiful stories weave them into your programs. Love to you, you can do it, develop that inner strength with daily practices and it will change your life too. |
Edited by - Charliedog on Feb 11 2018 03:34:37 AM |
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Chard
250 Posts |
Posted - Feb 19 2018 : 12:55:59 AM
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Parvati, thank u so much for your intention. I love the grounding idea of surrounding myself with horticulture as a Vata. I shall sit with that and see in what capacity that makes sense. Blessings my friend!
CD, thank u for your feedback which feels like GOD (good orderly direction). Right now I am studying hard to pass a licensing exam so I can work in this state at the end of the month. So that I’m clear is the next part of the puzzle for me and then trusting more will be revealed.
Thank u both. Your support is so valuable to me. C |
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Chard
250 Posts |
Posted - Mar 18 2018 : 9:12:20 PM
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Hi all! I wanted to share that I did in fact find a 30 hr a week job which includes benefits and although pay is not great we can make it work at an outpatient treatment center starting this week. It’s a great environment and holistically minded m and it feels right and a lot of colleagues have children and understand the flexibility involved in that. Nice people too and I can continue building my private practice on the side! God provides! I feel like I’m moving with the current of my soul just living here and pieces coming together!
Thanks all for your support! C |
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Dogboy
USA
2294 Posts |
Posted - Mar 18 2018 : 10:43:35 PM
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| Congrats! This is good news |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 19 2018 : 03:03:17 AM
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Blanche
USA
873 Posts |
Posted - Mar 19 2018 : 06:13:44 AM
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Work that I love...pls advise
