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 Yoga and Relationships
 Meditating: Micro aggressions when mentioned
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aguacate

Germany
44 Posts

Posted - Apr 02 2017 :  4:23:40 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
I am visiting my parents right now.

My father keeps making micro-aggressive comments (eye-rolling, making "jokes", deep sighs etc) whenever the topic mediation and also yoga comes up, e.g. when I go meditating.

Today I got extremely angry about it and I am not sure how to continue. I would like to visit my parents every few weeks, but I think I won't if it continues.

Any experiences?

sunyata

USA
1513 Posts

Posted - Apr 02 2017 :  4:41:13 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi aquacate,

Your post made me smile. This is common when you are a yogi/yogini. In time you'll figure out to keep quiet about your practice. Also, the practice of Samyama helps.

Then they'll start asking you questions. They just don't know the taste of inner silence and ecstatic bliss. If they did, they would do the same.


Edited by - sunyata on Apr 02 2017 4:45:36 PM
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jusmail

India
491 Posts

Posted - Apr 02 2017 :  7:38:09 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Second Sunyata
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Will Power

Spain
415 Posts

Posted - Apr 04 2017 :  5:10:40 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I agree with Sunyata :-)
My mother used to get very angry when I talked about that topic (even while she enjoyed Autobiography of a Yogi) because I was getting further from Christianity, so I learned to keep silent about it. Eventually she agreed to come with me to zen retreats that last 2 days in our local area
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BlueRaincoat

United Kingdom
1734 Posts

Posted - Apr 05 2017 :  04:11:53 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
HI aguacate

quote:
Originally posted by aguacate
Today I got extremely angry about it and I am not sure how to continue. I would like to visit my parents every few weeks, but I think I won't if it continues.

My father has never come to terms with the idea that I am not a practising Christian, like he is. He is quite pushy about it. Limiting interactions and the opportunities for this sort of discussion helps, but I try to do it in a discreet rather than a punishing way. I think it's a case of "forgive him, for he does not know what he is doing". Probably easier said than done. One can only try.

A certain level of assertiveness could also work to some extent. For instance, when someone criticizes meditation, I might ask "Do you know much about meditation? Have you tried it?" If the answer is 'no' , even if they don't say it, that kind of takes the wind out of their sails.

Good luck!
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Dogboy

USA
2294 Posts

Posted - Apr 05 2017 :  10:30:03 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Parent-child relationships are fraught with this dynamic. Keep up your practice, be proud of it! Eventually one of its fruits will be your amusement at those eye rolls and sighs, and your smiling radiance will let the air out of their balloon. In the meantime, go ahead and sigh yourself; imagine exhaling (surrendering) whatever negative emotions these judgements arise in you.

Edit:wording

Edited by - Dogboy on Apr 06 2017 08:24:25 AM
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dv2014

USA
93 Posts

Posted - Apr 07 2017 :  12:42:50 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I am in the same boat and I agree with others here. Even though my family is from India, my dad has huge resistance when it comes to Yoga and spirituality. All I can do is pray for him.

Another thing is that just because someone is not into meditation doesn't mean that they are less spiritually evolved ... I have to keep reminding myself that
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