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 Cant speak in front of people
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iseekbalance

USA
49 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  05:50:31 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
Hi guys,
I can't talk in front of other people and socialize with any person. I always feel I can't express myself indent of other people except my family and gf when other people are not around. These people I am talking about are people i have to interact with in my life for reasons like we share same house, or my gf friendly or so on.
When I had premature kundalini awakening 3 years ago n when I was stable I could speak to people being free and socialize but now I can't seem to interact with other people I don't know. I don't feel my ke right now and am really unstable . What should I do guys to be more sociable..I am always overthinking and it's ruining my life to feel happy.

Charliedog

1625 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  07:32:50 AM  Show Profile  Visit Charliedog's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi iseekbalance,

Sorry to hear about your difficulties. Do you have a daily practice?

If you have the feeling you are overthinking this means that you are living mostly in your head, your mind, your thoughts. This is one of the reasons that we can feel out of balance, we are not in the moment, we are the thoughts.

What will help you first is to ground, come back from the head to the feet. Literally feel your feet on the ground, walk barefoot, hike, be in nature, swim, feel your body. This will clear the mind, you will be more in contact with everything around you, including others.

Picking up a daily yoga practice will help you to develop inner silence, this brings more balance and peace in your life.When there is more balance it becomes easier to find the right words to express yourself.

You can start reading here http://www.aypsite.org/10.html

Wishing you the best!

PS Daily is key word


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iseekbalance

USA
49 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  07:50:01 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I haven't done daily practise for long time.. I am really panicky in my heart so I am not able to live my life with any freedom.I always feel confined now a days..when I meditate I feel relaxed but am not able to feel the same after the session.. previously I used to do spinal breathing focusing on first and third eye .. then do meditation .. now a days I don't do that much.. but can grounding actually help me when I don't really feel aware n present like before...
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Charliedog

1625 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  08:41:11 AM  Show Profile  Visit Charliedog's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Grounding is very important, you can experience this. Go out in nature en compare how you feel before and after. If you feel panic, feel your feet, how they touch the ground, the movement of your feet, rolling from heel to toe. Breathe, feel, don't influence, just feel.

Daily practice is the most important. Making the habit takes time, first you will maybe feel only relaxed during practice, but this will spread.

You can make an appointment with yourself, for instance, I will meditate forty days in row, two times a day for for instance 5 or 10 minutes. When you fail, start with day one again this way you develop discipline, a new habit is born after the forty days.

Make little notes how you feel during the day, write some positives at the end of the day for instance, this will give you insight in yourself.

From own experience I can tell you that yoga works, really, but the keyword is a daily practice. It is a marathon, not an overnight happening (free interpretation Yogani). You did it and you can do it, but you have to do it yourself.

All tools are available at AYP and AYP plus. The forums are here to help you, what more do you need ?

Edited by - Charliedog on Aug 24 2016 08:45:23 AM
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lalow33

USA
966 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  1:22:48 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
The statement that you can't speak in front of other people isn't true. You can do it; it can still be uncomfortable.

Grounding is good. Self-pacing is good. Diet may be something to look at.

Edited by - lalow33 on Aug 24 2016 1:25:02 PM
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Dogboy

USA
2294 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  7:49:55 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Practice friendly smiles with your mouth and eyes, and use them often whether you know the person or not. This simple act is contagious, and often evokes a greeting, so you don't even have to speak first. Smiling lightens your body, mood, spirit, it's absolute magic in that way. Over time, your being becomes accustomed to this condition and will loosen your knotted, unspoken words, I am certain of this.
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iseekbalance

USA
49 Posts

Posted - Aug 24 2016 :  11:36:41 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks guys for these uplifting advices.. I left everything from US and came to Australia to marry love of my life just last week. In US I was never involved in social activities and always was within myself and was only interested in spiritual stuff.. now I am married to the love of my life but with it came the responsibility of being social with all the friends and relatives of my now wife.I just got married today in court. But I can't help being sad and nervous to speak with people.I feel depressed around people simply because I feel confined. I will be 6 months away to my country Nepal after 2 weeks and hope to change myself and be social.. I am thinking to make continuous habit of meditation session when I reach my country and be happy when I come back to Aus.. and to add more, no one knows what I talk about coz only thing I talk about is spirituality. There is nothing else I like or know about then spirituality.. I don't have anything else to talk about...I feel in front of my eyes than I will live a very unhappy life since now I will be sharing my life with my wife and I will not be able to escape social activities.. I just hope doing daily session will finally change me n my perception. I would like to feel confident like before.. n I agree with Charliedog that Lately I am only living in my head.. hence I am not enjoying my time with my wife fully... when I focus my breath during social anxiety, I feel that people look at me but as I don't talk, they start disliking me..Guys thanks for listening to me... I wrote in these forum because only people interested in spiritual way understand me. Thanks guyssss
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Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Aug 25 2016 :  01:16:33 AM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
"Dare to dream, and dare to act on your dream."
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Charliedog

1625 Posts

Posted - Aug 25 2016 :  03:47:54 AM  Show Profile  Visit Charliedog's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Iseekbalance,

Congratulations with your marriage the love of your life At this moment you have a lot of change in life, so allow yourself to be sad or nervous.

Like Dogboy said, friendly smile, look people in the eyes and if you are nervous it is ok to say so to all new people around you.

If, like you say, spirituality is your only interest at least you have to start up a stable daily practice. After some time of daily practice you will feel more confident, the only way to know this is your own experience.

Dive in, visit some spiritual centers in your new neighborhood.
Maybe you can join a meditation group, be creative.
Share here your experiences if you decide to start AYP practice.

And don't forget, you are you, perfectly ok the way you are in every moment


Edited by - Charliedog on Aug 25 2016 04:09:56 AM
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sunyata

USA
1513 Posts

Posted - Aug 25 2016 :  10:37:15 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi iseekbalance,

I deleted my previous post. I didn’t think it was related to your question. Good advice from Lalow, Charliedog, Dogboy. Good to know you are from Nepal. That’s my country of birth so technically per the culture you are my Bhai (little brother). Congratulations on your big day!

You just moved to a new country and are meeting new people. It’ll take some time to build friendships. In the meantime, be friendly and get to know them. If you are more of an introvert and your wife extrovert, communicate with your wife. You can find a happy medium regarding social gathering/functions. I understand there can be way too many social gatherings to attend, as they say Nepali people just need a reason to party.

You are visiting Nepal for six months; make the best out of it. Visit Pashupathi, swambu, boudhanath. If there is time -trek up to Manang and Mustang and meditate in the lap of the Himalayas where monks have meditated for hundreds of years. Volunteer and donate to the locals and fill their heart which in turn will fill yours. Here is a retreat center near Boudha you can visit http://kopanmonastery.com/courses-r...ats/overview . Here is another one in Nagarkot http://www.yogaretreatnepal.com/. Take a trip to India if you are able to.

Go back to Australia refreshed and ready to start a new Life. Seek out kindred souls, you will find plenty of them in meditation and yoga meet ups/groups. Share your joy with them and they will share theirs. Daily practice will bring you home. Then you will always be home no matter where you go, where you live, who you meet. There will be intimacy with everyone and everything. Life will be simple when the minds stops complicating it. The unfolding, deepening and falling away continues with daily practice.

Please feel free to email me anytime.

Here is Trevor Hall's-Kathmandu
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qm1t_kd57d4


Namaste- Your AYP Didi,
Sunyata


Edited by - sunyata on Aug 25 2016 1:13:15 PM
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Charliedog

1625 Posts

Posted - Aug 25 2016 :  11:00:13 AM  Show Profile  Visit Charliedog's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
you Sunyata
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sunyata

USA
1513 Posts

Posted - Aug 25 2016 :  11:18:11 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
you more my dear Charliedog.
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iseekbalance

USA
49 Posts

Posted - Aug 25 2016 :  11:34:53 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks Sunyata mero Nepali didi .. I feel good and will take all of ur advice. Thanks Charliedog , lalow, dogboy and Bodhi tree.. I now know that only being spiritual again will help me live life and be happy.. I will spend all my time in Nepal to have constant session .
Thanks guys
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jebac

Croatia
2 Posts

Posted - Oct 19 2016 :  11:49:15 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I glad to hear you found your path again.
I also wanted to ad my 2cents... I think it helps a lot just to accept it and trough time it will loose its power.
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