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Flat4Wagon
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - Mar 01 2015 : 9:17:14 PM
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I'm happy to announce I've completed my first year of AYP practices.
I found AYP randomly browsing /r/meditation on Reddit.com. I read the introduction and it kinda struck a cord with me, I was hooked. Yogani has written an incredible guide to Yoga, the amount of knowledge in these lessons is mind blowing and I thank him for sharing it. Thanks Yogani, this is great stuff!
When I first started the lessons I figured I would be doing mudras and bandhas in no time but it turns out the techniques are more powerful than I thought. I felt the power of DM from the first sit, even though I wasn't doing it right for the first few weeks. I was doing concentration meditation previously and I was approaching DM in a similar fashion. I've since adjusted to the proper technique, at least I think so.... I added 5 minutes of SBP within the first month and had to self pace that technique a few times during the year since I was experiencing some chest pains. I did Samyama for a few months and it was good but I was struggling with letting go so I cut it out. I'll explore Samyama again once I feel I have a bit more inner silence. I played around with Mulabandha for a couple of sits but I could tell right away that it was too powerful for me and I wasn't ready for it.
My current practice is still 5m SBP + 20m DM + 5-10M rest. I think I can keep up with this routine twice a day quite comfortably for a long time. I'm currently not experiencing any overloading and it's smooth sailing even though the sits aren't as interesting as when I first started. The fireworks have subsided and it kinda feels like I'm just sitting there doing a chore. Regardless the positive effects on my life are noticeable. I'm more patient, loving, happy and "chilled out". The little things don't bother me so much anymore, there's been a great reduction in stress.
As far as inner silence goes I think I'm doing some progress, It's so hard to tell. These things are so subjective. I don't think I've ever transcended the mantra during DM. I've definitely had some sits where It felt like I was "deep" in a trance. Not sure if that's good or not. I usually come out of meditation feeling good. One thing I want to improve is all the second guessing about if I'm "doing it right" or not. I need to let it go and scoop up the mantra.
On the ecstatic side not too much is happening and that's a good thing. Sometimes I'll be doing something random like getting myself a coffee and I'll feel this slight pleasurable exhilaration bubbling up inside. Not sure if that's a symptom of AYP or just because I love espresso. Anyway, I get random pleasure sometimes. That's it. Honestly the whole activating Kundalini thing still worries me. I'm not entirely convinced that this is an actual spiritual function of the human body or a mental illness. I'm erring on the side of caution with my spinal breathing. Not sure if I want to add more time just yet. I'll let the inner guru guide me with this one.
As I move forward with AYP I'd love to deepen my inner silence, the ultimate for me would be to live in the present. The now is the gift that keeps on giving and I don't want to try and be present I just want to be. Ecstatic conductivity can come if it's safe, if not I'd rather skip it for now.
That's about it, I'd love it if you fine folks could type me a few words of encouragement as I continue on this journey. I need a bit of fuel for my bhakti. I want this to be worth it and sometimes the mind is good at making me second guess the practice.
Thank you so much!
Cheers!
Joel. |
Edited by - Flat4Wagon on Mar 01 2015 10:47:35 PM |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1571 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 01:20:25 AM
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Dear Flat4Wagon,
You are doing just great.
Sey |
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BlueRaincoat
United Kingdom
1734 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 07:01:07 AM
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Hi Joel
I agree with Sey.
No need to rush into any more practices. Mantra meditation is very powerful. 20 minutes of it twice a day plus the SPB is very solid practice and you are making a lot of progress. Great self-pacing too. All the best
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 07:46:30 AM
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Hi Joel,
Good work! The first year (imo) is the most difficult, and you did it!
I wish you a beautiful journey |
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Dogboy
USA
2294 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 08:20:44 AM
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quote: On the ecstatic side not too much is happening and that's a good thing. Sometimes I'll be doing something random like getting myself a coffee and I'll feel this slight pleasurable exhilaration bubbling up inside. Not sure if that's a symptom of AYP or just because I love espresso. Anyway, I get random pleasure sometimes. That's it. Honestly the whole activating Kundalini thing still worries me. I'm not entirely convinced that this is an actual spiritual function of the human body or a mental illness. I'm erring on the side of caution with my spinal breathing. Not sure if I want to add more time just yet. I'll let the inner guru guide me with this one.
I assure you it's not mental illness; so far as a spiritual function, it feels as if it's the activation of light in the body, apparently our natural state that is awaiting discovery. It also has a learning curve and I am learning as I go. Yoga is a blessing and a joy, and nothing you should worry too much about. It will happen when you are ready; following the AYP system will awaken kundalini gently, and Guru knows his stuff . Your self pacing is admirable and your caution will serve you well as you continue on. Keep up the good practice and congratulations on your anniversary! |
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kumar ul islam
United Kingdom
791 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 09:00:05 AM
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Ecdyonurus
Switzerland
479 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 09:46:08 AM
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Hi Joel, I also have done AYP for about a year now, and my experiences so far are very much in line with yours. Only relevant difference is maybe on the ecstatic side, since I feel that things begin to move on that side here, and I welcome this with joy, not considering this an achievement at all but just as a new track unfolding on the path.
Why does this ecstatic component scare you? Not trying to push you at all, just trying to understand. You spoke of "mental illness", sounds surprising to me. |
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sunyata
USA
1513 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 09:47:07 AM
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quote: On the ecstatic side not too much is happening and that's a good thing. Sometimes I'll be doing something random like getting myself a coffee and I'll feel this slight pleasurable exhilaration bubbling up inside. Not sure if that's a symptom of AYP or just because I love espresso. Anyway, I get random pleasure sometimes. That's it. Honestly the whole activating Kundalini thing still worries me.
Your post resonates with me -exactly how I felt and still feel. My practices were similar to yours. If you go back and look, I have posted something similar regarding the ecstatic side. It's been a little over two and half years of AYP and I'm only able to 5 minutes of breath meditation. Everything is a phase- bliss, overload, not much happening. Daily practices which you are already doing with self pacing is the way to go.
I've had partial Kundalini awakening and it was not fun, so the fear is there. Fear is yet another obstacle/blockage- being present with it (inner silence)is slowing melting it away. My bhakti is very strong-last week I was feeling great and tried to do 5 minutes mantra meditation. Not good- by the evening there was steam pouring out of every pore of my body
You will start feeling ecstatic conductivity. Having faith and asking the energy to back up a little when it's too much helps as well. You are doing awesome!
Sunyata
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Flat4Wagon
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 10:32:36 AM
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Thanks everyone!
quote: Originally posted by Ecdyonurus
Why does this ecstatic component scare you? Not trying to push you at all, just trying to understand. You spoke of "mental illness", sounds surprising to me.
If all I knew from Kundalini came from AYP I would be diving right in with more energetic practices but doing research elsewhere has made me a bit more cautious about this permanent change in the body. A lot of people who have premature Kundalini awakenings end up in the psych ward. I don't think this would be the case when you're following a program like AYP but better be safe than sorry. Obviously fear is something I need to overcome before I pursue this.
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ak33
Canada
229 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2015 : 5:25:35 PM
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In most cases of kundalini ending up in psychosis there is a theme of the practitioner pushing his limits excessively and not listening to his body. Some other cases involve substance abuse and/or other intense experiences. It is good to err on the side of caution, as long as the fear does not interfere too heavily with practice. But don't worry so much |
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Flat4Wagon
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2015 : 01:37:42 AM
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Good to hear, thanks! |
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