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JosephUK
United Kingdom
212 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 30 2013 : 3:49:10 PM
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Dear Cosmic,
i am also working very deeply with my mind. These periods of intense emotions of negativity and self hatred, loathing anger evil what ever emotion it is are signs of your deep longing for purification to take you to the next level.
as your mood has lifted and youve redoubled your efforts to tackle yourself and delve into the reasons for your emotions you can be happy.
it can be a great sign that things are happening both internally in our world when we can see an aspect repressed and hurt.
we need time and love to understand ourselves in our own way, but we also need the support to know that for some on the path of enlightenment our minds can bring up difficulties that at that time seem impossible to overcome.
but if we let go a little we realise there may be a duality to ourselves and we just need to combine our devotyed loving patient etc selves with that other self. be your own parent and counselor as yogani says your own guru, seeking understanding is great. loving that part of your self even better. :)
for me i work shamanicly with the shadow self i imagine that all my hatred anger evil thoughts are like a deep unexplored jungle, all sorts of wild untamed beasts in there.
so you work on the edge of the jungle, you chop a few trees down and make a fire, burning some of that vast jungle. once you have a clearing you can start planting seeds, bit of love here some happiness there.
be gentle with your self.
lots of love
joe |
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cosmic
USA
821 Posts |
Posted - May 02 2013 : 10:45:16 PM
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Hi sunyata, thanks for the encouraging reminder. Hope you are well 
Mr. Anderson, love received... and reflected back, my friend  . You recently mentioned a dissolving/integration of your "shadow side", and it struck a chord with me. I feel like I might be at the beginning of something like that, but time will tell...
quote:
Originally posted by JosephUK
i am also working very deeply with my mind. These periods of intense emotions of negativity and self hatred, loathing anger evil what ever emotion it is are signs of your deep longing for purification to take you to the next level.
Hey Joe, your sharing is very helpful. Thank you  . I find the above quote relevant to my situation, because I feel that this experience is taking me to "the next level".
The past few weeks have been absolutely amazing. It's still too early to discern what's happening, but now that the smoke has cleared a bit, I can see that a deep process is underway. The anger, hurt, sadness, and other negative emotions are what they are. But now I see that the "depression", aggressive behavior, and my use of alcohol as "anti-bhakti" were my doing. I allowed myself to get hooked by people and circumstances beyond my control, but now I see that taking the bait was my choice.
One thing that came out of this was a commitment to remain peaceful, understanding, and compassionate in the face of difficult situations and outer conflict. I don't need to react with aggression and negativity, and I've had some success in remaining calm under stress recently. Not perfectly, but I'm making progress...
Another thing was a complete willingness to face that which I've avoided my whole life. The things and emotions that make me uncomfortable, fearful, angry, sad, etc., the dark aspects of myself, others, and life itself. I am done running. I am done hiding and avoiding what I don't like. Denying that life is full of suffering, hiding my faults and pains, trying to put on a good face for the world and pretend like nothing's wrong... this doesn't work for me anymore.
I am ready to be fully, honestly, vulnerably, a raw, dirty human being with all its flaws and insecurities. To accept life as it is, with all its evils and injustices. To embrace others as they are, with all their ignorance, hate, and corrupt, egoic bullsh*t.
To face it all with compassion and acceptance. I know I can be that in the world. And so can we all.
Thank you all for your loving wisdom and support.
Namaste. AUM.
cosmic
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machart
USA
342 Posts |
Posted - May 02 2013 : 11:48:53 PM
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Great post Cosmic!...I'm working on how to understand life too...
...not there yet...embracing the mystery.
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Edited by - machart on May 02 2013 11:53:47 PM |
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2013 : 08:33:27 AM
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kami
USA
920 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2013 : 10:00:43 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by sunyata
When having a bad day I always repeat the mantra- Tomorrow is a brand new day!
That sounds like Scarlett O'Hara from Gone With the Wind (one of my all time favs!)
Love it, Sunyata!!
quote:
Originally posted by cosmic
To face it all with compassion and acceptance. I know I can be that in the world. And so can we all.
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sunyata
USA
1511 Posts |
Posted - May 03 2013 : 11:28:52 AM
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Kami- Yes!!! In fact I'm repeating it today... lol.
Cosmic-Very encouraging post. I needed to read this today! Posted just in time |
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Depression
