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 Satsang Cafe - General Discussions on AYP
 Techniques for Forgiving
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yogishankar

USA
83 Posts

Posted - Jun 24 2012 :  3:35:25 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
Namaste to all.

I have been observing inner silence and practising serious introspection of myself.

I found that I am still angry with my ex-wife (divorce happened more than 5 yrs ago) and have not yet forgiven her. I have also not forgiven myself.

Thankful to veterens in the forum, if any one can teach me few excellent techniques thru which I can forgive the ex and myself rapidly.

Love,
S

SeySorciere

Seychelles
1571 Posts

Posted - Jun 25 2012 :  01:15:24 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I know a technique or rather a ritual involving the Archangel Michael - there's a small prayer that goes with it, so I'll get back to you on that one if you are interested.


Sey
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areiv

Lebanon
1 Posts

Posted - Jun 25 2012 :  01:32:28 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
namaste
i cant teach you any techniques but i have an idia has worked whis me....acceptance
accept what you did.accept what she did..acceptance give you the power to let go and forgive
hope you pass this soon
salam
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Namath

350 Posts

Posted - Jun 25 2012 :  08:11:55 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by yogishankar

Namaste to all.

I have been observing inner silence and practising serious introspection of myself.

I found that I am still angry with my ex-wife (divorce happened more than 5 yrs ago) and have not yet forgiven her. I have also not forgiven myself.

Thankful to veterens in the forum, if any one can teach me few excellent techniques thru which I can forgive the ex and myself rapidly.

Love,
S



Hello Shankar

I can only tell you what works for me.

1-Acknowledge your anger and that it's normal human reaction since you feel hurt.
2-Consider the other person dead.
3-Do what you love to do.

It passes & if you were a person like me you will laugh at how big it felt when it happened & how small it feels when you're out of it

Love.


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yogishankar

USA
83 Posts

Posted - Jun 25 2012 :  11:31:22 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks to every one for advices. I was not clear in the first/ original message. When some one, who was close to you, had betrayed, Forgiveness seems to be very difficult. I was vengeful. I was asking Divine to bring vengence on her and I wanted justice. That was my case.

In fact, in my heart, I know that the incident (divorce) was good for me in many ways. Despite knowing that, I have been still getting that emotional feeling of anger due to her betrayal, whenever a flash of thought about her occurs in me. That anger in turn caused me to be vengeful.

I prayed with a local church pastor yesterday (I am not a christian) and he was very kind to tell me few moments of Jusus Life and how he prayed to Father for forgiving some one who betrayed him and made him to undergo crucification. He advised me to take similar attitude and pray to Divine to forgive the other person for whatever she has done to me unknowingly. He also asked me to pray to Divine to not to give me the temptation to get even or revenge with the other person. I am feeling OK after yesterday's prayer; however, still a long way to go.

Edited by - yogishankar on Jun 25 2012 12:14:18 PM
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wigswest

USA
115 Posts

Posted - Jun 25 2012 :  12:53:46 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Yogi, forgiveness is a process - sometimes a life-long one - not a one-time thing. It is an amazing and powerful learning/growing tool. Be patient and loving with yourself :)

I would suggest using thoughts such as Acceptance, Release (or Letting Go), and Compassion (for self and others) in your samyama practice. This has worked well for me :)
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Kahlia

161 Posts

Posted - Jun 29 2012 :  07:27:26 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I struggle with this - anger! arghhhhhh

Acknowledge, accept, acknowledge, accept, again & again & again..... Repeat.

Let go..... let go again then repeat the above.

Focus on renewal, the possibility of the future & everything your relationship with her taught you... Give thanks....go forward... Send her love & if you can't do that try to become neutral in your outlook toward her & love yourself. Forgive her BUT forgive her for YOU not for her....so you can move on. Release the pain & let it go so you can open.
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Kahlia

161 Posts

Posted - Jun 29 2012 :  07:38:04 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Lying down with my hand resting on my heart & breathing into it helps me a great deal. Under anger is pain that needs to be released. On a bad day I get down on the floor & lie there & breaaaaathe deeply into my heart center - the tears come, my hear opens & then I ask and plead goddess & the universe to take the anger from me. It works. Release. Vigorous yoga is also great for frustration & getting it out...
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sivasambho

USA
136 Posts

Posted - Sep 13 2012 :  1:27:10 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
"Awareness is constant discernment of what is true"
"At the end of sorrow is passion"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fgd1GY2OABc

"J. Krishnamurti"

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sivasambho

USA
136 Posts

Posted - Sep 13 2012 :  3:31:45 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I am partially guessing here...

At the end of passion, should be bliss

right?
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Kahlia

161 Posts

Posted - Sep 14 2012 :  09:24:31 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Siva- here's hoping!
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sivasambho

USA
136 Posts

Posted - Sep 14 2012 :  09:46:48 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by Kahlia

Siva- here's hoping!



Kahlia,

Hope is what we all have, especially if we are caught in between a brain and the heart... :)

I think i get the answer, yes at the end of passion, there is bliss.

So it is possible to achieve bliss by just not seeking it. What the worst could happen to us. Death is a big bliss anyway. Shame? ok let it come to us, there is nothing more graceful than what is inside us....
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