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gamefu
India
23 Posts |
 Posted - Nov 27 2011 : 11:36:08 PM
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I guess this question might invite criticism.But still.
what can sadhana do in attracting a girl? Can it really work? How?
what kind of sadhanas can one do for this?
Will it be necessarily a mantra sadhana?
Will it be vashikaran or something else?
Has this something to do with Kaamdeva?
As Kaamdeva is for sex, which is the diety for love?
how long can this sadhana take?
Is it stupid to do sadhana for this purpose?
***Topic Moved for Better Placement by AYPForum*** |
Edited by - AYPforum on Nov 27 2011 11:48:38 PM |
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nearoanoke
USA
525 Posts |
Posted - Nov 28 2011 : 01:33:44 AM
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As far as the AYP system goes all you can do is meditate and in samyama drop the sutra love or a feeling of the girl you want and let it go.
If it needs to happen it will.
The greatest lesson of life is that you have to be able to let go of something to be able to get it.
I think it makes more sense to use normal ways to get a girl than any yogic way
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Nov 29 2011 : 07:43:26 AM
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Hello Gamefu
No, I don't think it is supid to use Sadhana. I think most peoples problems are because they don't use Sadhana. As I am sure you know Sadhana means your practice. In a general sense this is everything you do. Your life becomes one Sadhana. I think nearoanoke is correct in saying that you should use "normal way." We deal with issues on two levels. The spiritual and the practical. But how does one separate one from the other? In aspects of my desires regarding women. I try to use the principle of attraction over promotion. Just as a light will attract a moth. If that doesn't work. Get dressed up, wash your car and go to a nice singles bar  . Be assertive, show confidence, act as wise as a serpant and as gentle as a dove.
A few humble thoughts |
Edited by - Mikananda on Nov 29 2011 07:56:04 AM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 29 2011 : 08:24:23 AM
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| It can help, but indirectly. If your purpose for doing yoga is to attract someone, there are much quicker ways. Yoga will change you over a period of years into something that women are attracted to, but there's no quick magic here. as Mikananda said, if you want a woman, get involved with them somehow. If you don't like singles bars, look for another activity that you like that women enjoy also. Show up consistently where people do that activity. And forget about finding a woman. There is nothing more attractive to women than a guy enjoying something they like who doesn't care about finding a woman. They can feel "needy" vibrations a mile away. |
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Nov 29 2011 : 08:36:03 AM
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| A further thought regarding nearoanoke statement of letting go. My times I will confuse letting go with giving away. In order to get love you must give love. The love you get is equal to the love you make. All you need is love, love is all you need. |
Edited by - Mikananda on Nov 29 2011 08:38:56 AM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 29 2011 : 7:45:57 PM
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OK Beatles fan!
And as Bjork says (from "All is full of Love"):
You'll be given love
You have to trust it
Maybe not from the sources
You have poured yours
Maybe not from the directions
You are staring at . . .
------------------------
In other words, if you see a girl you are attracted to, and pour your love on her, giving her all kinds of attention, she will be repulsed from you. But if you are happy and give love to people around her, but just briefly say "Hi" to her and ignore her most of the time; she will be attracted. It shows her you won't cling to her; that you are not needy.
PS Don't be waiting for her in your mind either or she will feel it. You have to be completely autonomous without her for this to work.
All is Full of Love amazing live performance:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDYMfm0JQOE
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Edited by - Etherfish on Nov 29 2011 8:09:32 PM |
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Nov 29 2011 : 11:04:56 PM
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| As with all things there is a balance one should have. It has been my experience that if you wait for the girl to make the first move. You end up waiting a long long time. It is the nature of a woman to want to be attractive. They like to feel that they are so compelling that one must take action. It is better to know where you stand after a short while than to carry on in useless expectation. There is a difference between being "needy" and expressing true feelings. It is kind of like fishing, if you pull on the pole to quickly you lose the fish. However, all these methods are based on deceptions. Better to be true to oneself and follow your inner voice |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 02:00:08 AM
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hmmm it is always fun to read how men analyse women's psychology |
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 07:33:38 AM
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Greetings Maheswariji
Can't you see! Me and Etherfish are trying to help gamefu find a woman  . Yes very interesting how one can expound large volumes of rhetoric on things they know very little about. Yoga is not a funeral procession. If your not having fun with it, you are missing out on a great joy. Who can know the unknowable. A psychologist once told be that men and women are the same, the only difference is their plumbing. I think it is like hot and cold are the same thing, the only difference is the temperature . I think this is true in the absolute sense. Phychologist call these polarized concepts, a contruct, and then they introduce the notion of polarization-alienation. They are very good at using fancy terminology (talk about rhetoric). With that said, try heating up your food with cold embers. Is this helping gamefu?  |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 08:01:10 AM
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My method isn't deceptive to the woman; you are deceptive with your own mind. It's just human nature. Men are the same - if a woman starts giving them a lot of attention suddenly, they will be repulsed. The difference is a woman can use my method and wait for the man in her mind and men can't feel that.
In other words, act as if the whole thing is no big deal. If she thinks it is a big deal for you, she will get this feeling you are a predator or you will cling.
Of course it is best to just "be yourself", and that is what this tries to force. It is not manipulating the woman; it is attempting to act as if you think with your brain, not your sexual needs. |
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yogesh
USA
153 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 09:50:30 AM
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BTW, FYI etc:
there are tantric mantras for attracting anything and everything...
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chit-ananda51
India
127 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 10:13:44 AM
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quote:
hmmm it is always fun to read how men analyse women's psychology
- ancient esoteric secrets are leaked out in this post - |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 11:08:52 AM
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In my experience, the most attractive person, to a man OR a woman, is someone who is truly authentic with both themselves and with those around them. It is hard not to feel "drawn" to someone who is authentic. So, gamefu, I would not recommend taking up spiritual practices so that you can attract a girl.... take up spiritual practices so that you can truly see yourself for who you really are, and learn to be authentic to that. There is nothing more attractive (in my opinion) than someone who truly knows and loves themself.
Love!
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 5:41:24 PM
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Well said CZ. You are a man of great wisdom.
A question for Sri Etherfish. If you wanted to get your true lover (GOD). The ultimate object of your desire. Would one use the method of appearing to be dis-interested, of not appearing needy. For surely you wouldn't want GOD to think you need him.
Sun Tsu, a high ranking Chinese military general and strategist during the late Spring and Autumn period. Stated in the book called The Art of War: All warfare is based upon deception. This book is still used today and taught at West Point. It is interesting that the setting in the Gita is a battlefield. On one side is your bad tendencies and the other are your good. In essence, everything can be viewed as a warfare. Hence, all is based on deception. Deception isn't necessary a evil thing. It is simply a condition. We determine it's meaning by the use it or not use it. We are engaged in a deception right now, the Internet. How do you know that you are not talking to a computer program. In fact, I could be hacking your hard drive as you are reading this. |
Edited by - Mikananda on Nov 30 2011 7:24:27 PM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 7:29:02 PM
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No you wouldn't use that technique on god. It is for humans only, although it works on some wild animals.
Acting disinterested dispels fears of the other person, and God wouldn't have those.
Yes we deceive people all the time, but what matters is your intentions. |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 7:33:58 PM
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| Well said Carson. The only reason we use techniques like I mentioned, is that people looking for a mate often don't know their true selves, aren't authentic, and repel strangers because they don't understand how people see them. That's why they look for esoteric ways to meet a mate; standard ways aren't working. |
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 11:15:40 PM
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| If GOD has no fear, then where does it come from? If GOD is omnipresent isn't he also in our fear? This too is a deception. For when I say that GOD is also in our fear I in fact mean that GOD is not also in our fear. That is why I say GOD is also in our fear. In a place where there is something that can be distinguished by signs, in that place there is deception. So if I understand, what you are saying is that we should only deceive humans, and some wild animals, and that this deception is good if our intention is to fulfill our desires. |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Nov 30 2011 : 11:33:53 PM
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| No I am saying it is not deception. And to deceive someone else to fulfill your desires is not a good intention. |
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Mikananda
USA
90 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 07:24:05 AM
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Hello my new friend Etherfish.
I know your statements are meant to be taken in the positive sense. Forgive me using this opportunity to practice a form of guided "inquery." I hope you have not taken offence to it. Just as iron sharpens iron and one heart reflects another. I believe we can both benefit from this method. It helps to develop a better understanding of what we really believe in. The truth is I use all of things that have been said above. Lately I have been looking at duality within duality. All things seem to have this quality. For there is a right view, a right intention, a right speech, a right action, a right liveihood, a right effort, a right mindfulness, and a right concentration. And so a right deception, a right dis-interest, a right needy, and so forth. These are the things that I am trying to develop. However, what most people are trying to do is to cut duality in half, and throw the bad part away. This isn't possible on the level of duality. To accept pleasure, one must also accept pain. For at the end of pleasure comes pain. Albert Enstein once said that "a problem can be solved on the same level that it was created." If so, then the solution is to rise to a level where we no longer view something as having signs. I am not sure if this will get you a woman, perhaps in the long run. I think it is much quicker and more easier to just have allot of money |
Edited by - Mikananda on Dec 01 2011 07:52:49 AM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 07:54:36 AM
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Money, power, looks etc. have some attraction to women, but what they are attracted to most is your behavior. That's why you see ugly, poor, powerless men with fine women.
So let's look at behavior.
If you have trouble finding women you like, you need to change your behavior. Is that manipulative, or just giving the woman what she wants? If you give a woman strawberry ice cream, and she says "i like chocolate better", is it manipulative to give her chocolate? Or if she doesn't say it, but turns her nose up at strawberry and looks longingly at the chocolate, is it manipulative to give her the chocolate?
So is it manipulative to discern what she likes and give it to her without her knowing?
It can be if you don't really care how she feels, but I can tell you do because you are wondering if it is manipulative.
I'll tell you what is manipulative: looking for some yoga magic that will change her so she likes you. Or if you are looking for yoga that will change you without your conscious knowledge to attract a woman. If this were possible, isn't it like saying you love to eat sausage but don't want to see how it is made?
So I am saying if a change needs to be made, it is the behavior of the man, and why not do it consciously? If I knew a woman was changing her behavior to be with me, I would not be offended as long as she cared about my feelings also. I imagine women would feel the same.
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whippoorwill
USA
450 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 09:18:00 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Mikananda
.....
I think it is much quicker and more easier to just have allot of money
Humpfh!
Big bank accounts can come and go, but a man who knows and loves himself is a great find indeed. For how can a man love me with all of my own quirks and foibles if he cannot love himself? There's nothing like being loved and accepted unconditionally. |
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Swan
India
256 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 10:32:44 AM
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Thanks friends for such an insightful discussion.
quote:
Originally posted by Etherfish
Money, power, looks etc. have some attraction to women, but what they are attracted to most is your behavior. That's why you see ugly, poor, powerless men with fine women.
Guess that will vary from person to person – whether man or woman. Every kinds are out there.
quote:
Originally posted by Etherfish
If you have trouble finding women you like, you need to change your behavior. Is that manipulative, or just giving the woman what she wants?
I would call it as learning and accepting, and then evolving. I believe this is the best approach, until you you go to the extent to do something which you think you should not do otherwise.
@ Mikananda, is this what you mean by the right deception or the right needy?
quote:
Originally posted by Etherfish
I'll tell you what is manipulative: looking for some yoga magic that will change her so she likes you.
Yes, agree. Trying to change somebody without her knowledge or permission is height of manipulation. We have the ownership over ourselves only and nobody else, and I should respect her freedom to choose or not to choose me. If there is some yoga/tantra/magic is there to influence somebody without consent (existence and effectiveness is much debated), it is generally considered as part of darker side of magic/yoga/tantra.
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yogesh
USA
153 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 10:51:14 AM
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I think many on this thread are taking this much too seriously, In India using a simple mantra or an amulet/talisman to attract someone or wealth or a good job is not considered as an ugly manipulative thing as is being suggested here.
It is nothing more than a nudge or an incentive to help...not some 'Indiana Jones and Temple of Doom' magic to overpower and control someone for sex...
It is more innocent than you think |
Edited by - yogesh on Dec 01 2011 12:06:17 PM |
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yogesh
USA
153 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 12:08:06 PM
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It's kinda like women in India praying to Goddess Katyayani to help get a good husband..
yogesh |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 1:20:49 PM
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quote:
I think it is much quicker and more easier to just have a lot of money
no woman that respects herself will go out or marry a man only for his money...this will be not a relationship based on love anymore,it is selling herself for the highest price she can find...
ps: sometimes men too go out or marry women just for their money....
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Edited by - maheswari on Dec 01 2011 1:21:34 PM |
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Etherfish
USA
3615 Posts |
Posted - Dec 01 2011 : 9:02:47 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by yogesh
I think many on this thread are taking this much too seriously, In India using a simple mantra or an amulet/talisman to attract someone or wealth or a good job is not considered as an ugly manipulative thing as is being suggested here.
It is nothing more than a nudge or an incentive to help...not some 'Indiana Jones and Temple of Doom' magic to overpower and control someone for sex...
It is more innocent than you think
Thank you yogesh,
that is SO funny, and makes sense too.
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Topic |
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Can any sadhana help in attracting a girl?
