Note: For the complete lessons, with additions, see the AYP Easy Lessons for Ecstatic Living Books.

Lesson 14 - Q&A – A happy woman

From: Yogani
Date: Wed Mar 3, 2004 4:54pm

New Members: It is recommended you read from the beginning of this tantra yoga archive, as previous lessons are prerequisite to this one. The first lesson is, "What is tantra yoga?"

Q: Thank you for the simplicity and power of the lessons. My hubby and me have worked on the hold back and blocking for about a month and we are getting the hang of it. He sure is. Last night we stayed in intercourse without orgasm for over an hour. I got lost after a while. I didn't know where. It was beautiful. I was filled with the deepest peace and sweet loving pleasure all over inside. Time and space disappeared. It is beyond description, beyond anything sex has ever been. I want to stay there forever, move into that place and never leave. It is still with me today, but fading away. I can't wait for him to get home from work so we can go deep again. He loves it too. I'm a happy woman. Can tantric sex replace the other yoga practices? It feels like it could. We are doing the other lessons too and started meditating in January. But we're a bit distracted from that lately, ya know.

A: It is wonderful that you and your husband are having good success with the tantra methods. It makes this old heart feel good.

As you continue, it will go deeper, and the experience will be more present in your daily activity. That is the purification and opening of your nervous system to divine experience. Preservation and cultivation of sexual energy is an important part of that.

Is tantric sex a replacement for sitting practices such as meditation, spinal breathing, mudras, etc? No, it is not, for a couple of reasons.

First, tantric sex is in a similar category with mulabandha/asvini and siddhasana, and success with these sexual energy-stimulating practices is dependent on continuing global purification through spinal breathing and deep meditation. You can go only so far with tantric sex without the prerequisite practices. Then progress slows down because you are using sexual energy alone for purification that requires broader and deeper measures in the nervous system. The same is true of the sitting practices that stimulate sexual/kundalini energy alone. Without spinal breathing and meditation, things will bog down. There can also be imbalances, kundalini symptoms, etc. So, sitting practices are very important, spinal breathing and meditation in particular, to complete the journey with a minimum of slowdowns and detours.

Second, purifying and opening the nervous system to divine experience is very dependent on daily practice – stimulating the nervous system to open like clockwork twice a day, every day. This is not very practical with sexual relations, though many would love to try for it. It is better to enjoy sex when it comes to us naturally, using the tantric sex methods to preserve and cultivate for higher experiences. Tantric sex will be enjoyable whenever we happen to do it, and a big help to our yoga. Then, the rest of the time, we will be doing our regular daily sitting practices, which assure us that we will be moving right along with our spiritual progress.

So, whether we are having sexual relations or not, advanced yoga practices will be there every day at the same times, morning and evening. If tantric sex is there too, then our yoga will be even better, and all of life will be beautifully illuminated.

The guru is in you.

Note:  For detailed instructions on the methods of tantra in relation to the broad scope of yoga practices and the enlightenment process, see the AYP Tantra book.

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