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brushjw
USA
191 Posts |
 Posted - May 18 2008 : 9:45:43 PM
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The week before last I felt drained from the demands at my job. As the weekend approached I thought it would be a good idea to go on a longer hike. I treated myself to a hotel in the Adirondack Mountains on Friday night so I could get an early start Saturday morning.
The route involved three miles along a gently inclining dirt road, a half mile along a mountain lake, then three miles up steep switchbacks and up and down peaks (the mountain is called “Sawteeth”) to the top. I was a little concerned about whether my physical strength was sufficient for the hike but the prior week’s hike had proved that a slow pace combined with prayer and chanting seem to work for me.
I didn’t expect the snow near the top. Snow had built up heavily in the depression formed in the trail from erosion. Water from meltoff formed a hollow area underneath so I had to be careful of my footing or I’d wind up to my waist in snow as my foot sank down all the way to the ground. I tried to stay to the side of the trail where footing was surer and I could use tree branches for support. The going was very slow and energy-draining.
After I’d been hiking for six hours or so I started to wonder about whether I would make it to the bottom before dark. I would slowly make my way to a summit, only to realize it was one of the ‘teeth’ and head downhill, again and again. I was a bit discouraged but the Gayatri mantra kept my spirits up. At one point as I neared a summit I decided to rest in the sun which had peeked out from the clouds. I knew I would be in trouble if I didn’t start downhill soon but I’d gone far enough that I knew going forward would be quicker than going back. The trail down was a mile shorter, which at my rate of pace was two hours.
I lay on my back, closed my eyes, and asked myself if I was prepared to spend the night on the mountain. I had no expectation that this peak was the true summit and knew that panicking would not be helpful. I completely surrendered to the possibility of staying there overnight. As soon as I surrendered the sound of the wind stopped – everything stopped. A second later I heard a fly buzzing around my head. I came back into my body, got up, continued on and found that the summit just ahead was indeed the real top. I made it back to my car a half hour before sunset.
One second of silence. So what?
The next day I realized that when the sound of the wind stopped that I had been subconsciously listening to the wind during much of the climb. The hike was eerily quiet with only the sound of my footsteps, trickling water, my breath, my singing and the wind. No people. Only a couple of birds. When the silence began my attention – my energy – was in the far hills where the wind would begin. As soon as I heard the flies buzzing, that energy came back to “me”. But that one second gap was all-encompassing.
I now know what to "do" with all the energy that builds up when I hear the Sound of Silence: I relax into it. When I do that often enough, as on a long hike, a gap appears into which my consciousness flows and expands. The process is very subtle becaue "I" can't direct it.
namaste,
Joe |
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AYPforum
351 Posts |
Posted - May 18 2008 : 10:50:24 PM
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| Moderator note: Topic moved for better placement |
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brushjw
USA
191 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 1:49:40 PM
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I went on another hike yesterday. For quite a while I had a hard time concentrating on the mantras. My mind kept wandering and I would have to guess where I was to keep to my set number of "I am" and Gayatri mantras. The hike was again quite strenuous and eventually physical tiredness seemed to calm my mental noise down.
In the col between two mountaintops I lay down in the shade, looking up at the brilliant blue sky, the leaves glowing in the sun, dancing in graceful movement. The SoS became quite loud and sustained. As the energy built up in my jaw I relaxed and continued to direct my attention upward to the wind and the leaves. I seemed to make a connection. It felt very right directing the energy this way. A minute later black flies began buzzing near me. I moved my attention to them but was unable to make the same connection, perhaps because they were so small.
At the top I again lay down, closed my eyes and relaxed. Immediately the SoS, the movement of energy, the attention outward (there was a stunning panoramic view of the mountain range at the top). This time the connection was strong and lasting enough to be somewhat disorienting.
All the way down my mind was like a laser focusing on sounds and I would merge when I heard the white noise of wind and water. At the bottom I sat on a stone in a large brook swollen with snow melt. My proximity to the water and the noise really disoriented me to the point where I felt queazy. I noticed my eyes were staring very intensely. When I moved the focus from my third eye to my heart the energy dropped way down.
My wandering mind made a lot of connections yesterday. One of the realizations I came to is that the fruit (phala) of meditative absorption is a pleasure not of the senses. It is not like the pleasure of seeing a beautiful flower, a sunrise, a child's laugh, graduating from school, being married, getting a raise, performing service, exercising, etc. etc. etc. It's as if a completely different person were receiving the pleasure. I guess in a very real way that's true.
Writing this is making me cry and I don't know why. Maybe it's hard for me to reveal my innermost self to others. Maybe I'm just tired. 
namaste,
Joe |
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emc
2072 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 2:00:55 PM
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Or maybe you just had a very deep touch of Truth!?  We often cry without knowing why when that happens. It sounds wonderful, Joe! It is truly not about pleasure of the senses as we former perceived it. It is senses turned inwards... creating disorientations and realizations like that! Please, continue hiking and tell us what happens! |
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LittleTurtle
USA
342 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 2:46:25 PM
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| Thanks for posting your experiences Joe. Very nice. |
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brushjw
USA
191 Posts |
Posted - May 28 2008 : 10:17:16 PM
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Thanks for your feedback and kind words, LittleTurtle and emc. I appreciate it.
It's only been three days but it seems like this last hike happened a long time ago. Strange. I'd like to elaborate a bit about what happened on the summit.
Again on this hike there were several disheartening false summits but this time I was prepared from the trail notes. When I finally arrived a couple of young men were already on the two main exposed rock sections with the view. The one on the larger section moved over and I ate lunch next to him on the fairly steep slope, enjoying the sun, the rest and the views. The guys were friendly but I was really not interested in talking. They bantered amongst themselves, also very tired.
I decided to take a nap and climbed down off the rock, lay my wind pants on the packed mud ground and lay down with my polartec jacket as a nice pillow. It was heaven! My body seemed to instantly absorb strength from the ground, while my consciousness was free to connect with the surrounding mountains.
As I stated in my previous post the SoS, the energy and the expansion of consciousness were almost instantaneous. Lately I've found that when I use my third eye to direct the energy outwards the bones in my face - from my chin to my third eye - seem to resonate in sympathetic frequency with the SoS/energy. Often my jaws ache until I concentrate on relaxing the muscles in my face. On the mountain during my rest, for the first and only time so far, my jaw muscle began twitching exactly like my eyelids do in sambhavi.
The hikes have been like meditation retreats for me. Practicing going back easily to "I am" hundreds of times (instead of my usual counting meditation) has finally made the mantra comfortable to me.
namaste,
Joe |
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Hiking, Inner Stillness and Surrender
