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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 05 2006 : 4:30:38 PM
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Hi all
The message given to me from Maha Lakshmi in the first Satsang I have ever gone to was: STAY HOME (I forgot which topic I wrote about it....and I don't have time right now to look it up..)
As the days pass by and I watch myself, it is very clear that Stay Home is simply "I am". Stay Home is to stay with the presence I am. To - whenever possible - rest in the sense of just being. Just the very fact of beingness. The instant I stay with Being, I am home. Home is presence. Home is an almost palpable substance permeating/surrounding the body (in fact permeating anything that can be perceived - the source and glue of everything). Home shines of itself. Home....knows...instantly. If i don't hinder it by resisting it (which is always effort), it will always pull me in the right direction (which is basically back to naught - as a make believe geyshir falling back down into the water) - and its action is always spontanious, and always perfectly fitted to the moment.
Home is everywhere - and right now it is eternally here. I never leave it - I only think I do.
So.....this is the only focus for me right now. Whenever I start on a mental trip, I simply watch myself doing it....the watching is detachment.....and in this gap I find home. Every time. It never fails!!! I feel like I have a billion dollars; a trillion volts of love and a life full of laughter inside myself. And the laughing shines from the streets I walk, the trees, the houses.....everything.
......I am sorry....but writing this down....it can't be explained in words  .
It is realizing that I can never find myself "in the picture" (or in the world or the movie, if you like) - as an object - but all of a sudden notice - and "see" that I am the screen on which everything is projected. And the seeing is loving.
I understand why "Being in the world, but not of it" was such a puzzle. It is so simple, yet so subtle: To be in the world is to be the white silent canvas on which everything "happens" (without what nothing could "happen") - while as to "not be of it (the world)" is simply that I am not a thing. I never was an object.
I looked for myself "out there" for many years. Then I looked for myself "in here" for many years. But the truth is - I cannot be "found" anywhere. I am already. I am not an object. I am their source.
I am home. I am not enlightened (I don't know anything). I am simply home.
Ps.This is no "achievement" of "mine". This is just simple facts. For all of us. And we are blessed to be all that we are. Absolutely all of us.
As for the Satsang: I do not worry at all about who Maha Lakshmi is...whether she is enlightened or not. It doesn't matter. All that matters is that those two words - stay home - made me surrender. Her message reached my heart...it went straight home. That is all that matters.
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alan
USA
235 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2006 : 4:42:30 PM
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Thank you for Sharing This Beauty Katrine As always I look forward to more "inadequate" words of your experience in Being |
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emc
2072 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2006 : 5:10:58 PM
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Katrine, it is wonderful to read!
Do you ever "land" in the good old mind/ego sometimes? What is that like, then? Any different from before you knew what "stay home" meant? Has the mind reduced its impact in any way? Does it shut up? Or does it "know" that you have found home and has accepted? |
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Anthem
1608 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2006 : 10:00:20 PM
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Hi Katrine,
Thanks for sharing your revelations from your journey home, I think your words are doing a great job of pointing to the truth, it is very appreciated and a great learning moment for us all.
That tip about just watching your mind take a mental trip and that being enough is very helpful, thank you.
If I could ask, did being from the heart coincide with knowing oneness for you?
love and a hug to you!
A |
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Frank-in-SanDiego
USA
363 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2006 : 10:33:12 PM
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Hari Om
~~~~~~~~~
quote:
Originally posted by Katrine
STAY HOME ... it is very clear that Stay Home is simply "I am". Stay Home is to stay with the presence I am.
Hello Katrine,
Very profound and simple... simple is so, so attractive to me as I see this is how everything around (me) works when you really take a look at it.
What you say also reminds me of the teachings of Don Juan, A Yaqui Way of Knowledge. This was written by Carlos Castaneda back in the late sixty's , early seventy's.
He spoke of 'find your spot'. That is, everywhere one is, there is a spot that is right for you. Like that, its the 'staying home' part you mention, yet the phyical part of it.
Don Juan also taught 'seeing'... Seeing what is real. We have talked much about this on various posts.
The books are debatable, between fiction or non-fiction, yet it was some of the best reading I have done that profoundly altered how I looked at the world . I could not put the book down as I did with other sequels to this original book.
I have no point to make e.g. read the book, etc. It just brought that feeling back of the info in the book - the message of simple, yet the student ( Carlos) was so caught up in the world that some of the teachings Don Juan gave was convoluted to Carlos' reality.
Any way, thx for the post.
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2006 : 03:51:55 AM
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Hi all
Thank you!
emc wrote:
quote:
Do you ever "land" in the good old mind/ego sometimes?
When I am presence I never really take off. Therefore there is no landing. Ego - pr definition - is activity....it is always "flying around". Of course the thoughts still come and go! I am not capable of "doing anything" with them. But...I watch them.....and the difference is that I now know they are not what I am. So why take a walk with them? It is a waste of energy! It is simply not interesting, that's all. But yes....they continue to roam. It is not a problem - that's all.
quote:
Or does it "know" that you have found home and has accepted?
Mind and heart is one in knowing. Mind cannot know by itself. And no - it does not "know" that I have found home. I have not found home. I and home are not separate. So if you ask: have you found home - I must answer no. I have not. Simply beacause I am home. So are you. We always were. It can't be split in two. What happens is that mind finds home more interesting than its own activity. Home happens to mind. That's all.
Andrew said:
quote:
If I could ask, did being from the heart coincide with knowing oneness for you?
In the beginning of this perception it felt like everything came together in the heart. That I met myself there. But now I can't limit it to any point in time or any object in space. It is simply everywhere.
Also.....I am digesting. There is something about your question, Andrew, that is not clear. Are you sure that is what you want to know? Is there another question hidden in it?
Frank!
Once - it must have been about 25 years ago - I found three books by Carlos Castaneda in the library in Oslo. I "ate" them  . I never read them since then.....so I don't remember much. But I remember the impression they made. I was dumbstruck.
Frank said:
quote:
He spoke of 'find your spot'. That is, everywhere one is, there is a spot that is right for you. Like that, its the 'staying home' part you mention, yet the phyical part of it.
Yes....actually.....wherever I go, wherever I am is the right spot. That's just it! Nothing seems....wrong....or like a mistake....or a misplacement....anymore. Nothing is the matter! It is such a relief.. |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2006 : 04:34:11 AM
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Hi Katrine
It is such a treasure reading your words, you not only have this wonderful experiencing but you also have a gift for expressing it so beautifully.
I wonder if your "beingness" is indicating any kind of "service" for you in the world - writing a book perhaps
I am also curious how you would perceive the information you need to take your next step in wherever you go i.e. do you feel for instance that you are open to a universal love intelligence ?
Louis |
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emc
2072 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2006 : 09:24:42 AM
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Great to hear, Katrine! Love to read your words! The lack of emotionality, the lack of interest in the mind...
I wonder though, is it a neccesity to clean the system from wounds and "dirt" before you can "stay home"? Do you feel you have dealt with all your wounds? Are they still there, but less intense? Or are they still there, hurting, but you can see the hurts for what they are, and not identify with them? As you said about the mind and thoughts: "I now know they are not what I am. So why take a walk with them? It is a waste of energy! It is simply not interesting, that's all." Is it the same for emotions and wounds? Or are they clean enough not to take any place?
The reason why I ask is because all descriptions of the spiritual path points at the importance of healing yourself from old wounds...
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Edited by - emc on Sep 06 2006 09:38:32 AM |
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Anthem
1608 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2006 : 10:27:43 AM
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Hi Katrine,
quote:
In the beginning of this perception it felt like everything came together in the heart. That I met myself there. But now I can't limit it to any point in time or any object in space. It is simply everywhere.
Also.....I am digesting. There is something about your question, Anthem11, that is not clear. Are you sure that is what you want to know? Is there another question hidden in it?
Yes, sorry about that lack of clarity, there was another question hidden under an apparent layer of fear to express myself, I am aware of it now thank you. I am not half as worried sometimes about what I think about me as I am about what I think “they” might think about me! Same thing really I guess!
Anyway moving on, what I was wondering is that I had this very experience of meeting myself in the heart which has been an incredible coming home in itself. There is a knowing and understanding of how I leave my Self now and staying has been so much easier than ever. Of course, something always wants more and I don't have a profound perception of oneness and have been contemplating why not in the back of my mind. So I was asking about how this sense of oneness developed for you if there was a time of "digestion" as your body and mind caught up with your jumps in awareness?
From your descriptions, it seems to me that it might have been your mental pre-occupation with the thought of “not staying home” that was a big enough to block your view of “home”, do you think this was the case? I might be doing the same in a similar way.
Anthem11
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alan
USA
235 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2006 : 10:40:48 AM
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Hi Katrine
I agree with Andrew and Louis that your words convey your experience beautifully. I used the word "inadequate" because you had said words can't describe. What propels me on in my yoga practice, what makes me continue to "brush my teeth", is this fresh new bud opening in me of, as you describe it, "...mind finds home more interesting than its own activity. Home happens to mind. That's all." I have had just enough small tastes to tell me that peaceful place is where "I" want to be always. Mind is beginning to want to take a back-seat. Thank you for inspiring |
Edited by - alan on Sep 06 2006 3:03:01 PM |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 09 2006 : 4:53:11 PM
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Hi Sparkle
You wrote:
quote:
I wonder if your "beingness" is indicating any kind of "service" for you in the world - writing a book perhaps
For a long time now I have enjoyed expressing myself through writing. But "writing a book" just never.....seemed spontanious and flowing. Just the thought of it was a struggle! The poems.....I never had to ponder over them. They always start with a tingle in my heart....a wonderful inspiration, and then they come through....in a matter of minutes. I don't have to decide to write a poem. They simply appear. I did think about writing a book. In fact....10 years ago I wanted very much to write a book. But for all the usual egoic reasons. There were second agendas hidden....like wanting to reach people....to touch their hearts....so that i could be somebody. Deep down (and eventually surfacing full force) was the feeling that this motive was "false". I wanted to "touch" people in order to feel needed. Life does not work that way. Life needs nothing. It is enough in itself. Life takes care of itself. It doesn't need my help. Only Life touches Life. What would i write about? "My way" to truth? No. My way is not interesting. But truth is. Only truth is interesting. And truth is always alive....continuously new.
Anyway....as the years went by I released the need to "write a book". And that was good. Because write ( ) this minute....this very instant....I am indeed writing. The communication with you is happening write () now; and I flow when I respond. What is written here in this forum (by everybody).....after a while there are pages enough for "a book". In fact; it is "an electronic book" already.....and it is indeed alive!
This is much better! I flow, you flow....and together we dive into the ocean. So.....talking to you in writing feels no different than talking to you live. I write in the same speed I talk. I don't "correct" my writing usually.....I trust that what comes is ok. Maybe "my outflow" in the world is.....this. To spontaniously respond to the questions asked. Or simply: To spontaniously respond. Whatever the context.
If Being finds it purposeful it will strike a heartstring and the sound of it will make me write that book. If not - the book is not needed. Something else will occur. Perfectly fitted to the moment.
I really have no idea, Louis. All I know is I stay home....and the rest will surface when the time is write ().
The meditation groups I host are....changing. Or rather....I am different with the people there. There used to be a routine. But I can't stick to planned agendas anymore. So I have decided that when the next course starts on Monday 9/11...I will talk to them about meditation. Then meditate with them. And then let them ask questions. If answers are there in me, they will surface. Just like they do here....when I talk to you. Next week I don't have to talk about meditation. We'll simply meditate. And then commune in words. I watch my mind struggle with this idea. It feels out of control. I understand that. It is true It will just have to get used to it
If Being finds it purposeful it will strike a heartstring and the sound of it will make me write that book. If not - the book is not needed. Something else will occur. Perfectly fitted to the moment.
I really have no idea, Louis. All I know is I stay home....and the rest will surface when the time is write ().
quote:
I am also curious how you would perceive the information you need to take your next step in wherever you go i.e. do you feel for instance that you are open to a universal love intelligence ?
*Laughing*
I know you know that I just answered that question above, Louis
I perceive because I am home....or rather; I perceive because I am perception. So are you! How can I not know what to do in this moment? I am this moment! No "know how" is needed to be. It is already happening. The problem comes when you focus on the next step. The next step is future. Future is mind. It is never here now. Being never worries about the next step. Then why should I? Just like a heart beat, stepping occurs effortlessly. Intelligently.
And no - I am not open to a universal love intelligence; I am a universal love intelligence. So are you! No difference at all. That is just it......we make it so complicated....by obscuring our very Beingness with stories, we actually come to identify with the idea that we are anything other than the universal love intelligence. Nothing is anything other than love intelligence.
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 09 2006 : 5:45:25 PM
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Hi emc
You wrote:
quote:
The reason why I ask is because all descriptions of the spiritual path points at the importance of healing yourself from old wounds...
Yes.....I have allowed a lot of pain to surface. Living in a body implies being hurt. Pain can't be avoided.
But - "healing myself from old wounds" - who is healing who? What I am and you are, cannot be wounded. Only mind and body can suffer pain. Suffering occurs the instant I start to tell stories about the pain I feel. The instant my mind goes into activity during pain (whether emotional or physical pain) I prolong pain. Two things happen: I miss the moment (where all healing takes place) and the mental activity suppresses whatever emotional flow is there. So it accumulates. This is how pain leaves scars. The traces of pain is because of the story we tell about it. Otherwise it would come....be felt....watched....and then be gone. If I can manage to be silently with the pain it is possible to disidentify from it. Even chronic pain can be disidentified from. I am not pain - pain is not my ultimate nature. Love is.
quote:
I wonder though, is it a neccesity to clean the system from wounds and "dirt" before you can "stay home"?
"Wounds" and "dirt" obscure the fact that I already am home. Purification takes place not because we are dirty, but simply because we think we are.
quote:
Do you feel you have dealt with all your wounds? Are they still there, but less intense? Or are they still there, hurting, but you can see the hurts for what they are, and not identify with them?
Yes and no. I have not delt with wounds. This is how it appeared to be: Wounds surfaced one after another. First all the suppressed ones. I allowed them....I resisted less and less. For a while I therefore hurt more and more.....I was heartbroken for several years. Until the tides turned....and I found myself momentarily empty. A strange and unknown feeling of being empty like a balloon filled with air. Strange because with the wounds not there, my identity was missing. Wounds and identity seem to be the same thing. Then the next hurt happened. Those were the "new" hurts. The hurts of today. Eventually understanding ticked in: To be alive is to be vulnerable. Excruciatingly vulnerable. If I could manage to not prolong a hurt by mental activity....but simply watch it come and go....then all of a sudden there were no traces. And the less traces (memory...images...stories)....the less....adhesive tape for the "hurts" to hook on to. Gradually less and less identification with hurt. But also - the more vulnerable - the deeper the pain. And: The more vulnerable - the greater the love.
Love melts all. |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 09 2006 : 5:58:17 PM
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Hi Andrew
quote:
From your descriptions, it seems to me that it might have been your mental pre-occupation with the thought of “not staying home” that was a big enough to block your view of “home”, do you think this was the case? I might be doing the same in a similar way
Right on, Andrew!
And not only that - any thought is basically a version of "not staying home". If you take a hike with it. If not - a thousand thoughts will not trouble you. Just a flock of seagulls flying by. And knowing seagulls....they will find you pretty boring if you leave no food for them to eat....soon they will see the futility of coming your way
Sorry.....I have to go to bed now.....long day at work....I'll finish this tomorrow.
Night all **** |
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vishnu
United Kingdom
14 Posts |
Posted - Sep 10 2006 : 06:29:51 AM
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Hi Kathrine, This description of your experience being at Home
remind me the teaching of Sri Nisargadatta, and Sri Ramana Maharishi.
You have been blessed,enjoyed.
Love&Light. |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 10 2006 : 07:11:00 AM
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Andrew wrote:
quote:
There is a knowing and understanding of how I leave my Self now and staying has been so much easier than ever.
This is it, Andrew. The understanding of how I leave the real self, (eventually sprinkled with gradually expanding glimpses of the real self), is the whole work. This is it. It is not complicated - once seen.
quote:
I am not half as worried sometimes about what I think about me as I am about what I think “they” might think about me! Same thing really I guess!
Andrew....what is your fear? What is it you fear most......what could be the worst anyone could think about you?
quote:
Of course, something always wants more
That thought - by its very appearance - indicates that you have "left yourself". Wanting more implies lack. Home is never lacking. Find out what it was that you found more interesting than staying home. What pulled you away from yourself? Understand that. Be infinitely patient with yourself. Every time i leave myself - I do it out of love for myself. I have just misunderstood. I am ignorant of what I am, when I hunt for love elsewhere. Understanding will rid you of the idea that love can be found "out there". Love is what you are.
quote:
I don't have a profound perception of oneness
Mind alone cannot perceive oneness - and yet mind craves oneness. Again - what propels this desire, is the love of ourselves. We already love ourselves - we just don't know it. Be compassionate towards the mind. It does its best. Gradually it will come to see its own not-separate-ness. Gradually it will surrender to the fact that it is you who are. Without you - mind would not be here. Nothing would be here without you!
The love you are is already melting the resistance of the mind. No need to do anything. Simply allow it. Know that you are. Don't worry about who or what you are. Just stay with the fact that you are. I am. After all - who can deny that fact? Noone.
quote:
and have been contemplating why not in the back of my mind.
Don't hide in the back. Come forward. Only then can understanding take place. It doesn't matter if we carry good or bad thoughts - any thought is a clutter. Be aware of all the clutter. Don't stuff some in the closet. It is too dark there....you can't see anything then. Allow - wholeheartedly - all of you.
quote:
So I was asking about how this sense of oneness developed for you
The sense of oneness did not develop. It was quite sudden. It had nothing to do with me. The sense of oneness is not different from the oneness itself. There is nobody there to perceive oneness. It is not two.
quote:
if there was a time of "digestion" as your body and mind caught up with your jumps in awareness?
I am always digesting. I used to be constipated - that's all. And no - the body and mind does not "catch up" with awareness. Awareness shines through them. As it shines through your body/mind. That's all. The body and mind have no existence separate from awareness. There never was two...or three....many. It only seems so when I limit myself (identify) with the body/mind. |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 10 2006 : 07:20:18 AM
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Hi Alan
quote:
I agree with Andrew and Louis that your words convey your experience beautifully. I used the word "inadequate" because you had said words can't describe. What propels me on in my yoga practice, what makes me continue to "brush my teeth", is this fresh new bud opening in me of, as you describe it, "...mind finds home more interesting than its own activity. Home happens to mind. That's all." I have had just enough small tastes to tell me that peaceful place is where "I" want to be always. Mind is beginning to want to take a back-seat. Thank you for inspiring
Thank yourself, Alan
And investigate that peaceful place.....come to know it as yourself. |
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emc
2072 Posts |
Posted - Sep 10 2006 : 4:40:02 PM
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Katrine!
Thanks for being and writing here! =) Your words help me a lot!
There's no place like home...
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Anthem
1608 Posts |
Posted - Sep 10 2006 : 9:29:24 PM
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Hi Katrine,
Thank you for taking the time to reply to my/ everyone's posts. Grateful- Can you feel it?
It really makes sense to me and something that I have come to realize recently that as you point out, all the thoughts we have are (in their own way), just confused desires to help us return home. By seeing them this way, it helps me to accept them all and not to fear them. I have come to love the message my fear brings to me, I see it as my greatest ally, it is the path to freedom for me.
I have been investigating my thoughts about the "lack of oneness" I understand now from “bouncing” them off of you that they are just an expectation that I needed to let go of and that I will be aware of what I am aware of despite my efforts in any direction.
I have recently made an effort to allow myself to live out any thoughts that I feel I need to live out or think out, instead of telling myself that I know they aren't necessary. I watch them now, give them their space and let them do their thing. Like passing seagulls as you say, thank you for that perspective of not resisting them. I find my mind is tricky with finding ways to resist things! <-See look there it goes again!
I have experienced a tremendous freedom and awareness of love in my being from embracing the thoughts and fear that hold my attention away from my "Self”, it becomes "addictive". So in the end, what is there to be afraid of if it all leads to freedom? I can't wait to find more!
As for an awareness of "oneness", I realize that everything is unfolding in me as it should be and that it is fun to watch it play itself out. Thank you for your insights, they help me get more clear!.
All the best,
Anthem11
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david_obsidian
USA
2602 Posts |
Posted - Sep 11 2006 : 10:02:24 AM
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Katrine, I hope the message "Stay home" is purely figurative and doesn't mean you aren't going to do your World Tour one of these days -- if it does, a lot of AYP Yogis here are going to be disappointed.
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 12 2006 : 03:57:47 AM
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Hi everyone
Thank you - all of you - for being so receptive to what is communicated here. It makes a heart sing!
David:
quote:
Katrine, I hope the message "Stay home" is purely figurative and doesn't mean you aren't going to do your World Tour one of these days -- if it does, a lot of AYP Yogis here are going to be disappointed.
A healer once told me: "The world is your office". It ment nothing to me then....but now, writing in this forum, it has come true! Life is a wonder...
Also - ever since childhood I have been in love with the English language. There is a story behind that....I might post it sometime...it is rather cute.
Anyway - in short: If Being finds ripe whatever fruit I carry, I will go anywhere Life pulls me. I would still be home Literally speaking. I am no good with finances and organising, though....I'm not very practicle. What you mention needs funding also. I haven't a clue, David. If it is ment to be - I'll come. Things will simply fall into place, then. I'll love to see all of you, that's for sure
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Sep 12 2006 : 04:01:12 AM
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quote:
Katrine, I hope the message "Stay home" is purely figurative and doesn't mean you aren't going to do your World Tour one of these days -- if it does, a lot of AYP Yogis here are going to be disappointed
David, I'm sure Stay Home means stay in Europe - sorry tough
Katrine - down on knees bowing and kissing ground , thanks for your great reply, and also the other replies which I still go back and re-read.
Your perspective on "understanding" really struck home, this is something I've been getting to grips with myself and in fact is the great asset of this forum. It seems it is not enough to simply have the experience without the mechanisms of understanding to stay on the wave of the experience. Like a surfer learning the art, it is a combination of feel, experience and understanding that keep her on the wave and then it all becomes an exilarating joy, at least that's what it looks like, I'm constantly loosing the wave and clambering onto the next one.
Ok if your not going to write a book then obviously you will have time to come to Ireland and give a retreat here, maybe for a weekend. I'm sure I could organise a few bodies to attend. In fact David might even return to his homeland to avail of the opportunity.
L
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 12 2006 : 06:29:37 AM
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.....*laughing*....
Sparkle:
quote:
Katrine - down on knees bowing and kissing ground
Don't forget it's yourself you are bowing to - it is your depth you are kissing.
quote:
I'm constantly loosing the wave and clambering onto the next one
Louis. You can't lose what you are. Would there be waves apart from the ocean? Why settle for being a wave, when you can have your cake and eat it too? You are oceanic. Waves and all. Period.
Has it crossed your mind that you don't accept that waves die down? This is hard to accept only as long as you limit yourself to being a wave only. You don't need to clamber onto the next wave. You already are it. Without you, no wave!
quote:
It seems it is not enough to simply have the experience without the mechanisms of understanding to stay on the wave of the experience
Things are not what they seem. Not only is it not enough to have the experience without the mechanism of understanding - it is impossible! It never was possible! You just thought it was. The "mechanism of understanding" is the ecperience, the experiencer and the experienced. No division. The mechansim of understanding is awareness. It is alive. And the source of all. It is not possible to "not stay on the wave". You are always it! However - it is possible to identify with stories that tell you otherwise. But those stories are not real. Good story - granted - but not real.
quote:
Ok if your not going to write a book then obviously you will have time to come to Ireland and give a retreat here, maybe for a weekend. I'm sure I could organise a few bodies to attend. In fact David might even return to his homeland to avail of the opportunity.
.........*still laughing*......
I'd love to come to Ireland, Louis. Some money will "rain" on me one of these days, and i can afford to go In the meantime i feed the children, walk the dog, cook dinner and all the rest of it
PS. Didn't know you were a good old Irish lad, David |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 12 2006 : 06:36:36 AM
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Did you know my favorite beer used to be Guiness ?
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Maximus
India
187 Posts |
Posted - Sep 15 2006 : 04:20:43 AM
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Hi Katrine
Do you ever worry about the certain death of family members and yourself? |
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Katrine
Norway
1813 Posts |
Posted - Sep 20 2006 : 1:41:06 PM
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Hi Maximus
quote:
Hi Katrine
Do you ever worry about the certain death of family members and yourself?
Hmm....
Yes and no.
I definitely feel fear. To me - all fear is basically a fear of death. Death of identity (through "loss"); death of body; death of form. I know that I don't know what "death" is.
But - I never worry about the death of family members or myself. After the cancer 10 years ago; the worrying stopped. When confronted with an acute situation (i.e. when my daughter was critically ill last year) fear enters.....but then a great calm settles in me. As if a finger pointing to a stirred sea had the capacity to still the ocean. The calmness is that sudden and equally profound. This has been so for many years. So - fear is there - fear comes and goes - but I let it. I don't fight it. I accept it is there. It rises and falls in me. And when it is gone, I don't transfer it into the future. Or rather - I don't fill the Now with fear. The calmness won't let me. Fear is past; the source of fear is past. Past is usually thought. I never talk about fear inside - it is simply not at all interesting.
Worrying (which is inner dialogue and tension) is a complete waste of Now.
I also know that "staying home" is deathless. I can't tell you why I know this. Only that what is is what is.
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Anthem
1608 Posts |
Posted - Sep 20 2006 : 7:57:50 PM
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quote:
Worrying (which is inner dialogue and tension) is a complete waste of Now.
I couldn't agree more. This is an important statement and something that I try to live by. I know you are aware of this Katrine but it's worth saying that not only is worry a complete waste of now, but most thoughts or pre-occupations with things (other than what you are doing at the moment) are a complete waste of now. They take you away from what is in front of you, what you are currently doing and detract from your overall enjoyment of life.
A good example for me would be that I used to eat and read the paper, eat and surf the net, eat and think about what happened, what might happen etc. For the last year or so, I make the effort to just eat and enjoy every moment of it. Not only is it not boring, everything tastes so much better and the experience is so much more fulfilling, richer and more real. The other day I ordered some sushi and ate while watching TV. The next thing I know, not only am I finished eating, I completely missed it and could hardly remember any of the enjoyable details (as I love sushi). So it was a good reminder to not waste my opportunity to really be there and fully live the experience of "eating" which is reward in itself.
I guess the above is fairly accurate unless you are trying to live the experience of multi-tasking!
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Edited by - Anthem on Sep 20 2006 7:59:11 PM |
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