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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Sep 30 2013 : 11:03:59 PM
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I've been doing AYP's deep mediatation and pranayama for only 1 month. Today, while i was reading some more of the main lessons, i felt a ball of hot energy coming not from the root but near the bottom of my spine, making it's way up, and stoped its ascension somewhere in the middle of my chest. It didn't give any pain, so i didn't give it much attention.
In the evening, I did my second prana+DM session of the day, then took a 30 minutes nap. I didn't sleep, I just relaxed, then I felt again this ball of hot energy making it's way up my spine, it was now at the spot at the top of the back of my neck and the base of my head. I could feel a blockage there preventing the energy from going up some more, then the blockage melted away and the energy continued going up. I was scared that this might actually be a full blown kundalini awakening and that would put me into some extreme feelings of (pain?/pleasure?) while i was half asleep. I forced myself awake and told that energy to stop it's ascension for today, that now wasn't the right time, and it calmed itself back into the base of my spine.
By the description above, do you think that this energy is Kundalini? Full blown or partially? From the stories I've read, kundalini takes months or years to reach the crown, why would mine melt it's way to my crown so quickly? (average time passed from the first feelings at the base of spine to the crown ~5 hours)
for more details, recently in my DMs, there is regularly this pleasant smell coming from whithin, I'm not sure if that is the bliss everyone is talking about, it's not overwhelming, just a nice feeling. |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Oct 01 2013 : 12:46:37 AM
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Hi MrSteroids1,
Welcome to the forum.
Yes, this is kundalini. Everyone is wired differently, so for some people it can take years of practice before kundalini begins to rise, whilst for others only a short amount of practice is necessary.
When kundalini does begin to rise, it is quite common that there is a brief rising, where you will feel energy rising up to the higher centres in a relatively short space of time. This time could be just a few minutes or a few hours. It will then often return to the base of the spine and begin a very gradual rise again to the higher centres. This second rising can often take years to complete. This is the reason that people say that it takes many years for kundalini to reach the crown.
Terms like partial awakening and full-blown awakening are relative and don't really mean very much. It really depends on what you are comparing it to. Fear can come up during a kundalini awakening, which is natural because it is a new experience. There is really little to worry about if you are sensible about your practices and use the self-pacing techniques wisely.
You may find this article that I wrote last year helpful:
What is kundalini?
Christi |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 01 2013 : 01:23:07 AM
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Thanks for your reply Christi.
So, if I understood well, that means that the general kundalini awakening has two phases, firstly a rapid rise burning through blockages then settling down after this job is finished. Then comes the second phase which takes much longer and is more complete. |
Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Oct 01 2013 01:35:48 AM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Oct 01 2013 : 01:38:08 AM
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Hi MrSteroids,
That's right. Although for some people the first phase can be barely noticeable, so it appears as if it is just a gradual rise towards ecstasy taking many years to complete.
You may find this lesson useful:
There she goes: kundalini that is
On the subject of the beautiful smell, this is the awakening of one of your inner senses. We have a full set of inner senses which awaken as kundalini awakens.
Christi |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 01 2013 : 1:37:41 PM
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Simple curiosity, is there a more or less known time lapse between the end of the first phase and the beginning of the second? I've got to admit I'm excited for more. |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Oct 01 2013 : 4:28:33 PM
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quote: Originally posted by MrSteroids1
Simple curiosity, is there a more or less known time lapse between the end of the first phase and the beginning of the second? I've got to admit I'm excited for more.
Hi MrSteroids,
The second stage will start straight away after the first. However, there can be a period where there are few or no symptoms of purification so it can seem as though nothing is happening. Then symptoms start and it becomes increasingly clear that something is changing.
For some people, symptoms are there right after the first stage, so it really depends on the person.
Christi |
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maheswari
Lebanon
2520 Posts |
Posted - Oct 02 2013 : 06:08:32 AM
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very informative replies dear Christi...thank you |
Edited by - maheswari on Oct 02 2013 06:08:52 AM |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 02 2013 : 4:16:29 PM
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We're 2 days later. I felt kundalini again during my nap after my first session of the day. I think that the first phase didn't have the chance to finish because i panicked last time. kundalini was up there again in my skull, but this time i allowed her to do what she wanted to and not interfere. She crawled around in my head for some minutes, not going directly to my crown. There was one little panic attack that lasted a second, I suppose that was the effect of purification. Unlike last time, she wasn't pushing hard. She went back down the spine on her own after, I believe, her job was finished for now.
I hope that she will keep this gentle approach for the second phase |
Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Oct 02 2013 4:21:36 PM |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 14 2013 : 6:37:49 PM
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Updating again. The second stage most definitely started. From times to times, it feels like I'm either sitting on the sun, or like I'm about to have an orgasm, or even both at once. It awakened 2 days ago during a night. |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 17 2013 : 02:36:53 AM
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Ok, I think that kundalini have already reached my throat center. All of this is happening so quickly. I'm saying that it is cleaning my throat chakra because I'm being disillusioned. Just 48 hours ago, I got realization about what the point of life is, which at the same time healed a profound emotional scar at my heart. It's for us to create our own heaven down here on earth, to create a place where everyone can enjoy living in. That also came with the realization that we're all immortal souls, separate but linked together by the Great Creator who divided himself into tiny pieces and gave us our own individuality. Since It is immortal, we all are, we all are bound to be alive for eternity. Good thing that for every incarnations our memory is erased, it gives us the illusion of a new beginning. My Heart has pretty much been open all of my life, I've always been compassionate. Only the root and solar plexus gave some resistance, which made me resolve early childhood emotional wounds that i was still carrying.
This is going so fast, I'm scared. I think i would have been happier without this holy knowledge. Does enlightenment comes necessarily with knowledge of the great truths of the universe? I'm only 21 years old... have not even been practicing for 2 months yet.
I wish I had a physical guru. |
Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Oct 17 2013 03:04:22 AM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Oct 17 2013 : 03:10:09 AM
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Hi MrSteroids,
Sounds like good things are going on.
Yes, spiritual awakening comes with realizations about the divine nature of the universe and about the true nature of the Self. It is a big part of the journey.
The spiritual path is about settling in for the long haul. There is a way to go and it won't all happen at once even if it feels like it is at times.
Pace yourself and enjoy the journey!
Christi
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2013 : 5:49:32 PM
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Well, maybe i could use this thread as a journal to report my journey, if that's all right?
I would only like to rectify my last post saying that kundalini reached the throat, which was false. I said it because from what i learned, the throat chakra deals with truth, but now i can feel the energy and it's still down the spine, still slowly cleaning my sacral chakra. These "realizations" I spoke earlier of were actually only strong unresolved negative emotions caused by a past drug induced psychosis. I know for real what they are now because yesterday I've been freed from some of them, and now i can see them for what they truly were.
Healing past emotional wounds is really like a typhoon, the closer you get to the eye, the stronger the winds get. But if your will is strong enough to keep you going forward, you'll arrive at a safe place where healing happens.
These "holy truths" i spoke of earlier, I don't believe them anymore. They may be actual truth, but it was the mind who thought them while deep in psychosis. If they really are truth, I'll find out later, it's not important to know now.
oh and i have reduced my number of practices to once a day for now. |
Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Oct 22 2013 12:52:40 AM |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2013 : 4:16:18 PM
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Today in my DM, a bright orange light appeared after some minutes meditating. There was also the feeling that much energy was active in my belly.
My best guess is that the sacral chakra was activated. I kept my calm and was able to bath in the light for a minute, then i lay down to rest.
Still no objection about me writing my journal on this thread? |
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Will Power
Spain
415 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2013 : 6:04:12 PM
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Please post them here! |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2013 : 6:43:38 PM
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will keep posting then :) |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 23 2013 : 3:07:37 PM
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Alright, so last night i had difficulty sleeping, I really don't know what happened to me but something really happened. I felt panic attacks every few minutes, then there was a bigger one, then after that i felt different somehow. Today, i feel like something is missing, but i don't know what.
Honestly, I'm tired of this, I feel like I'm in an identity crisis. I feel like stopping practices for a while to regain a sense of stability, that's what I'm going to do. I've already achieved my initial goal which made me start daily meditation and i don't feel the need to go further right now. I don't have interest in being in unity with the universe.
I'll resume posting after the break, or if things keep happening even during the break. How long will the break be? Could be a few months, could be the rest of this lifetime, i don't know. Anyways, you won't hear from me for a while. Bye :) |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 25 2013 : 04:02:08 AM
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I know what happened... It's my ego, it dissapeared, or greatly weakened. What happened that night was the shift of my presence in the ego, to the witness. My self control now is much greater than few days ago, and i find it somewhat easier to see my insides with my third eye and control my energy flowing in the spine than before. It's a quite positive change, i feel like a new man. Is this unity?
Since that night, I have zero mental chatter, it's all silent in there but the thoughts that are mine. I am less fearful of things. This is a big change, i feel a little empty. This will need some getting used to.
Still in the break, still want stability. |
Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Oct 27 2013 01:43:44 AM |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Oct 28 2013 : 12:26:41 PM
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It seems that stopping practices isn't stopping kundalini. I've declared it to myself, I've prayed it to any higher being who might be listeniing that I want kundalini to stop, at least for a few months, I've fought againt kundalini, trying to prevent it from going up further, without much success.
Last night, I've awoken at 3am with more panic attacks. It was less violent than two posts ago, still not pleasant. The heart chakra was being cleaned this time. After the last violent attack the chakra was opened, then there was still some lesser ones after that, like i'm falling into something. I can feel a difference today, it's not as brutal as the day after the cleaning of the solax plexus chakra, i feel more stable emotionally, at peace.
Still not doing practices, still want kundalini to stop entirely its course upward. |
Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Oct 28 2013 12:34:12 PM |
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Oct 28 2013 : 4:16:32 PM
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Hi MrSteroids1,
If you want to slow things down, try sexual release with or without a partner. |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2013 : 12:12:54 PM
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Got more panic attacks last night... Honestly, is it possible to stop kundalini once awakened? It's not even ecstatic anymore. I don't feel hot energy anymore neither, but i do sometimes feel cold energy.
What will happen once all chakras are cleaned? because i really don't want to be enlightened right now. |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2013 : 4:48:32 PM
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Hi Mr. Steroids,
The purification of the body is a big thing which takes many years to complete. So you need to pace yourself and settle in for the long haul. If things are feeling uncomfortable or disturbing then you need to cut back on spiritual practices for a while, or even take a break completely for a time. When you are ready again, you will know and you can come back to the journey again.
Remember that spiritual practices include things like praying to higher beings, even if the prayer is to slow down the process of awakening. Praying to higher beings to slow down the awakening will actually speed it up. Looking within the body using the inner eye will also speed up the process. In fact bringing any attention at all to the process will accelerate it, including fighting against it and trying to make it stop.
The best things that you can do to slow down the rate of transformation (if that is what you want), are the following: Grounding practices, self pacing spiritual practices and not fighting what is happening to your body.
This lesson may be useful for you:
Kundalini symptoms, imbalances and remedies
Christi |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2013 : 5:51:27 PM
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obviously you didn't read all of my posts on this thread :p
I have not been doing any practices for two weeks~, but things keep happening
quote: Originally posted by MrSteroids1
I've prayed it to any higher being who might be listeniing that I want kundalini to stop
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Edited by - MrSteroids1 on Nov 02 2013 6:18:48 PM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Nov 03 2013 : 03:34:42 AM
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Hi Mr. Steroids,
quote: obviously you didn't read all of my posts on this thread :p
Yes, I read them all.
quote: I have not been doing any practices for two weeks~, but things keep happening
Things will keep happening, even if you stop practices all together. It is possible to put kundalini back to sleep once it is awakened, but it takes a long time. It is also not something that I recommend because it is time consuming and is a waste of an incredible opportunity.
The painic attacks that you are experiencing will not go on forever. Things will settle down and stabilize. For now concentrate on grounding practices, which means taking a long walk every day, digging in the garden, helping others with their chores, cleaning the bathroom and so on. It will help a lot.
All the best
Christi |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Nov 03 2013 : 08:04:47 AM
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Thanks Christi, i'll do just that |
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MrSteroids1
Canada
72 Posts |
Posted - Nov 04 2013 : 01:11:04 AM
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While i was at work today, a pretty big obstruction in the base of my neck dislodged itself without a warning, which sent my head spinning.
Later at night when walking back home, i found myself watching the world like a movie i was in no way part of. That's when i felt my inner void folowing me everywhere i go, whatever i do. I did not like it.
Is this what enlightenment is? to become the void? Stillness in action? Nothing about this felt ecstatic or blissful, just alot of fear |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Nov 04 2013 : 12:46:22 PM
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quote: Originally posted by MrSteroids1
While i was at work today, a pretty big obstruction in the base of my neck dislodged itself without a warning, which sent my head spinning.
Later at night when walking back home, i found myself watching the world like a movie i was in no way part of. That's when i felt my inner void folowing me everywhere i go, whatever i do. I did not like it.
Is this what enlightenment is? to become the void? Stillness in action? Nothing about this felt ecstatic or blissful, just alot of fear
Hi Mr. Steroids,
No, that's not enlightenment. Enlightenment is an abiding beyond fear. What you are experiencing is a result of purification. Carry on with the grounding practices. I would wait until things have become stable again and remained stable for at least a month of so before resuming any spiritual practices again.
Christi |
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