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Jeanine
USA
14 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 09 2013 : 01:06:55 AM
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Mental illness runs in my family. My mother suffered from severe anxiety all of her life and required hospitalization for it. She suffered so much, it breaks my heart to think of it. My father was a severe hoarder. I have inherited an anxiety condition similar to my mother's.
I have read every book for years and years. Been through every kind of therapy, medications, spiritual practices, you name it. Some things sort of/ kind of worked for awhile, almost, but all were short lived. On top of the suffering of the anxiety, which affected every area of my life, I felt guilty that I musn't have tried hard enough in the therapies, with the self-help books, etc..
When I began Deep Meditation back in March, there was an enormous initial response. For the first time in my life, something was different, good different. Then, after a few weeks, I started having breathing problems. Oh no. Not another failure. But my initial experience was so positive, I had to persist.
So I applied the self-pacing practices. I slowed down, eased up, and relaxed the effort. And then I added Pranayama. Within a short time, a few days actually, the breathing problems disappeared.
I have been meditating since March. It is now July. I can say, with all certainty, that the mental illness which has run in my family for generations, will end with me. Deep Meditation is not just curing the anxiety, it is reaching into the very root of the problem and eliminating it, bit by bit. It's happening before my very eyes. For the first time in my life, I know what to do with it.
So many people are suffering with anxiety disorders and it is hell. On top of it, they are being made to feel guilty because they haven't managed to conquer their conditions. Some, like me, receive bits and pieces of help along the way, but nothing lasting, no cure. I was lucky, because I happened to stumble upon Yogani while browsing at amazon. And I found out that, my anxiety disorder was not the impossible, incurable, monster I thought it was.
For people with anxiety disorders, AYP should be mandatory reading. I will recommend it to everyone I can for the rest of my life.
God Bless You, Yogani. Thank you for my life. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1553 Posts |
Posted - Jul 09 2013 : 07:41:55 AM
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Sey |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Jul 09 2013 : 08:56:57 AM
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Very inspiring Jeanine. Very happy to have you here. 
Lots of Love,
Carson  |
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rce
USA
50 Posts |
Posted - Jul 09 2013 : 09:34:00 AM
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| I am happy for you, Jeanine. And let me add my thanks to Yogani! |
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mr_anderson
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - Jul 09 2013 : 10:11:44 AM
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Thanks Jeanine for sharing this.
I've personally experienced mental illness, mainly in the form of suicidal depression, almost crippling anxiety, anger problems, and a temporary (lasted for about 1 to 2 years) schizophrenia like episode (having auditory hallucinations of persecution). The latter was connected with a bad hallucinogenic experience, extremely poor mental state and depression, malnutrition, extreme anxiety, and a series of factors that all climaxed in a complete nervous breakdown when I was 19 years old.
This was almost 10 years ago now, I've been practicing meditation and mindfulness for almost all of those 10 years, and AYP for perhaps 3-4 years. Today I experience virtually no stress or anxiety, on-going joy and happiness virtually never tainted by even a low mood, freedom from the desire for intoxicants, and just a general equanimity, fearlessness and peace.
These are the combined effects of meditation, and bhakti - which for many is the essential desire we all have for a free-er and happier life experience.
I'm sure your results will continue to blossom over time, and I'm very happy for you.
love
Josh |
Edited by - mr_anderson on Jul 09 2013 10:12:03 AM |
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AumNaturel
Canada
687 Posts |
Posted - Jul 09 2013 : 12:08:08 PM
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Thanks Jeanine for sharing this. Be it illness, life struggles, or the pursuit of greater freedom, such accounts are an inspiration to our practice.
I too am only beginning to extend and explore the new-found inner potential ever since committing to a daily practice that has deep meditation and energy work at its core. I remember your initial post a few months back, the exact symptoms you describe that are very familiar (anxiety shares a lot with symptoms of depression), and how for you, taking up pranayama a little earlier than you felt ready had a positive impact. The AYP books also mention it is sometimes helpful for those dealing with excess energy symptoms. It really is a great practice, and especially that we can see its immediate effects without necessarily requiring some exceptional energy sensitivity or other arbitrary prerequisites. |
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Jeanine
USA
14 Posts |
Posted - Jul 10 2013 : 01:18:55 AM
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Thank you everyone for your welcoming and heartwarming responses
Josh (mr_anderson), thank you for sharing your experience. It is very very encouraging to hear this. I had a mental breakdown back in 2000 and there always remains the fear that it could happen again. To know what you went through and of the effects of meditation and bhakti in your life, it is more confirmation of what I am experiencing every day and which I expect will, as you said, "continue to blossom over time." Yes, bhakti is strong for me too.
AumNaturel, you remembered me
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AumNaturel
Canada
687 Posts |
Posted - Jul 10 2013 : 11:08:30 AM
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Your mention here of symptoms did remind me of a post by a certain someone :) and that resembled those of my own.
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JosephUK
United Kingdom
212 Posts |
Posted - Jul 11 2013 : 05:51:24 AM
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Hey jeanine,
i'm so happy that youve found this resource that is free and so comprehensive.
it can be amazing to see how many people have come through such struggles in life and found meditation a very valuable healing factor in their lives.
I myself suffer from "schizophrenia". I came away from practices for a while as a result of disturbing thoughts during deep meditation and quite a lot of instability. so i went for mindfulness particularly breath meditation combined with a few rounds of spinal breathing and shambhavi mudra which seems to be clearing big blockages in my pituatary as a result of being a smoker.
I'm finding that i dont have a massive amount of inner silence as a result of breath meditation. however it has helped me with my devotion.
just of late ive been struggling with negative emotions overwhelming me, but this morning ive found myself listening to the devotional calls of shiva and shakti within me and the ongoing love making within me.
so now i'm considering my mantras whether it be shiva shakti, sita ram or iam to see which one might be best. but i can feel my body steadily opening and poisons washing from me.
lots of love and big respect for listening to your longing and searching for and finding the right practice for you.
i'm not that far down the enlightenment road but i can tell you that what we have found here thanks to Yogani and all the great Yogis and Yoginis throughout the ages is a treasure trove and its ours to practice to learn and to enjoy. how awesome is that!
love joe
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Jeanine
USA
14 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2013 : 01:22:37 AM
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Hi Joe (JosephUK),
Thank you for your beautiful reply. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get back here.
What you wrote inspired me. Yes, it is wonderful to have found this place and Yogani. Like you, I am feeling my way day by day, and working through different things as they come up. The instructions here are so extraordinary for that. You wrote that you can feel your body steadily opening and the poisons washing from you. I feel that with myself too. Yes, very awesome.
Thank you for your lovely welcome. I look forward to seeing you around, dear friend. |
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Mental illness
