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chicritter
Australia
8 Posts |
 Posted - Jun 23 2013 : 03:25:06 AM
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Hello All
I wanted to tell you about what happened to me.
I've been training in chi meditation for about 5 years. I've put thousands of hours in this period. The technique I was taught was dropping chi into the dantien, as well as holding the breath and and dropping. This is dropped from crown down to secret place 3 fingers below naval. What happens is heat is produced like tummo. I've been on a number of retreats too.
My last retreat last year was a disaster in terms of negative symptoms I never experienced before in my life.
I was into my third day of my retreat when all of a sudden I felt like fainting, like I couldn't breath. Much fear too. Had to go to the bathroom a lot to pee. Those nights I had terrible images whilst trying to sleep. And feeling to push and lash out at person nearby.
My friend next to me meditating had a breathing fit in the meditation hall and collasped next to me, I had to hold him up.I went slow the rest of the retreat.
When I returned home, the symptoms were even stronger, really bad chest palpitations ( i thought maybe i was having stroke?), migraines, diarieoa, dyhydration. An impending feeling to lash out, and realising this feeling making more anxious.
I went to the doctor, and he said heart, blood perfect. And to take a break from work maybe stress.
These extreme symptoms slowly passed, but was left with some anxiety.I couldnt watch violence, horror or bad things on tv. And still was some pain pressure in chest area. Heat rising, and feeling the energy in the core of the brain doesn't feel to great.
I didn't completely stop but after sometime I stopped training for months.
I returned to training and after had developed depressing emotions on some days. I ended up really hating my job, and quit.
The depression seemed to pass, as I relaxed more, meditated less.
Nowadays I train far less, there are still occasional anxiety symptoms but the depression gone and how have a bit of bliss now. The heart area is more free flowing now.
The other day I trained long like I used to, I'm unable to pack anymore energy in my naval- no more heat. it just rebounds up through into my heart and even goes into the core of the head no matter what. This makes it very difficult to have empty mind, as I felt the chi go into the core of my brain again I had weird thoughts and emotions like grandeur? That's when I realised its the energy causing me problems.It just causes sickness.
Nowadays I have decided to not train at all. Just do grounding things like eat food, be with people and sex.
Unlike some of you, my background is train in full lotus for hours at a time.
What do you think happened? Isn't the energy in the dantien near naval the most grounding? This contradicts it seems.
What do you recommend I do?
Thanks!
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Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Jun 23 2013 : 07:22:31 AM
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Welcome to the AYP forums, chicritter!
I think you have it right, ground. Once you feel stable, can you go back to your practice without going all the way in? Meaning can this practice be self paced or is it an all or nothing practice? If it can be self paced, I would suggest doing just a few min of it and slowly building up on the time spend in this practice.
Also, from what I read, and I may have missed something there... doesn't seem like there is really any meditation is there? It seems like the whole time you are manipulating energy? If that is the case, see if you can do a few min of meditation... no following energy, just letting the mind do what it does and bringing it back to silence, again and again (deep meditation is what we recommend here in AYP http://www.aypsite.org/13.html ).
You are pretty strong internally to have survived those severe symptoms and not got into fear and anxiety and run away from practices... Kudos to you for that... Just be a little aware of yourself, your capacity and adjust your practices to fit in with that... the progress you make will seem slower, but in reality it will be faster as you won't have to stop to recover every time you overload.
Wish you all the best!
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Christi
United Kingdom
4514 Posts |
Posted - Jun 23 2013 : 10:10:56 AM
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Hi Chicritter,
The issue you are experiencing could be caused by the practice you are doing. Dripping chi from crown to the dantien below the navel will activate the crown chakra and the nadi (meridian line) which runs from the crown chakra down through the dantien. This can create a very unstable situation if it is done too early on in the spiritual life.
These lessons are both about managing excessive kundalini and may help you:
http://www.aypsite.org/422.html
http://www.aypsite.org/69.html
There is also a lot of stuff in the main lessons about the dangers of going to the crown too early. Run a search on the word "crown" or "crown chakra" and you should find some useful information.
Christi |
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chicritter
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jun 23 2013 : 8:53:28 PM
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The technique can either be done with completely empty mind or single pointed on dantien spot. This is done also with reverse breathing method.
The energy buzzing and heat can activate with any standard meditation if i'm sitting, I have to be careful it doesn't rise up again there.
I sure hope when I fully recover from this we don't have to deal with this sort of thing ever again. It makes me really hate meditation, despite myself having a passion for it.
Thanks for the welcome and tips. |
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chicritter
Australia
8 Posts |
Posted - Jul 16 2013 : 01:08:41 AM
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This one goes out to people who need, I'm glad to help!
Just wanted to let you all know, I solved this issue after I decided to deal with it after 10 months or so of not taking charge! I just decided- hey ive been meditating for years Im in charge, im ending this bs.
Please bear in mind, the mind has plasticity and it not the real you!
The symptoms I suffered were really bad panic attacks, followed by anxiety, then combined with depression.Even Tinnitius. These all came about whilst on a retreat about a year ago.
I cured all of this very quickly and indefinitely, with no useless meds, no docs, no therapy no superstitions, no bs.
Cure: I went on a 3 day retreat, meditated pretty much the whole day in isolated wilderness outside and indoors. I emphasized an empty state, like you about to fall asleep but not quite. Keeping good posture, creating tummo like heat focusing on this emptiness. When you have this unpleasant mind states it's as a result of mind going to fast and short circuiting.This technique will reset the mind, and you be good as gold.
After the retreat all symptoms gone. Keep up meditation after as maintenance for a bit and then you will be fine. |
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Will Power
Spain
415 Posts |
Posted - Jul 16 2013 : 1:42:05 PM
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| great! |
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My negative symptom retreat disaster
