AYP Public Forum
AYP Public Forum
AYP Home | Main Lessons | Tantra Lessons | AYP Plus | Retreats | AYP Books
Profile | Register | Active Topics | Members | Forum FAQ | Search
Username:
Password:
Save Password
Forgot your Password?

 All Forums
 AYPsite.org Forum
 Yoga and Relationships
 Self-Sufficiency
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Printer Friendly
Author Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  

SeySorciere

Seychelles
1532 Posts

Posted - Sep 07 2021 :  07:15:06 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
Lately, it crosses my mind that because of the flow of universal love and the sense of "no lack" (comes and goes, but still flow is in that direction), I may be missing my close ones' need for a more "personalized" love. I worry in particular for my daughter and my niece and her two kids whom I share my home with. I love them enormously but there is no connection.
Have I lost the ability to connect? Is this a natural consequence of being Self-Sufficient or am I un-consciously hiding in the bliss state?
Evidently in the state of "no lack", there is no-one to connect and to connect to but that is "my point of view"; what about them? Am I being available to them?

I intend to ask them - obviously . But still throwing it in here for thought




Sey

lightandlove

Germany
85 Posts

Posted - Sep 07 2021 :  10:48:34 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
"If you love the sacred and despise the ordinary, you are still bobbing in the ocean of delusion."
-Linji

This quote is staying with me for quite a while now.
If you feel like your own bliss keeps you from your ability to connect, it may be time to relax a bit and give your energy more outward flow for a while. A sense or state of "no lack" or self-sufficiency in regards of the witness or your soul is a healthy realization, but it is important to stay grounded in the ordinary.
So if you wish for more personalized love to your close ones, be there for them and have open ears for what they have to share. It is the most beautiful present to give. If they do not seem interested, it's a different story - there's no need for an attachment to create something in them e.g.
Go to Top of Page

Christi

United Kingdom
4369 Posts

Posted - Sep 07 2021 :  2:30:50 PM  Show Profile  Visit Christi's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Sey,

What you are going through is a stage on the path. It is an important stage, but as Yogani says in the lessons, it is not the whole of the journey. At some point, we have to go beyond separation, into unity. There there is no more sense of "other". At that stage it is no longer possible to ask a question like "am I being available to them?", because it would be meaningless.

You may find this lesson useful:


Lesson 333 - Dissolving the Witness in Unity


"And, yes, that sense of separation will gradually dissolve over time as we continue to move into the second (ecstatic) and third (unity) stages. The thing to do is keep going forward. Keep active. Keep engaged in life. Inquire gently into those discomforts and the loneliness you are feeling about the witness state in relation to the rest of life. Also inquire into expectations, like the expectation that enlightenment is supposed to be "romantic" or not lonely. These are all mind tricks for self-inquiry. That is where the doorways are. The divine flow will emerge from these contractions as you release them. " [Yogani]

You may also find this lesson addition useful:


Addition 333.1 - Is the Witness a Retreat from Life?


"The natural shift toward a joining of inner and outer life will happen once we have any degree of witnessing. It is not necessarily a dramatic thing. It is just a gradual shift in motivation, and then there is joining of the witness with activities motivated by heart, where they were separate before. The perception of witness as separate is gradually transcended in this process, and that is the rise of unity. We "go out" into the witness, and then we "come back" with the witness into divine flow in the world, and merging in unity. Like that." [Yogani]


See also this commentary:

Self inquiry, the witness and non-duality


Christi
Go to Top of Page

interpaul

USA
525 Posts

Posted - Sep 07 2021 :  6:33:52 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Sey, Your question reminds me of a post I did about a year ago. I believe Sunyata responded by challenging me with a statement something like: "what you question you already believe". I think it is a great idea to check in with your family. If you truly feel universal love streaming through you, they may be in touch with that in your actions. If they say, as you fear, "Mom/Auntie, you are so distant always", you have your answer.
Go to Top of Page

SeySorciere

Seychelles
1532 Posts

Posted - Sep 08 2021 :  07:17:55 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thank you, all for pitching.

My question does not stem from a need I have (well, yes and no). I go for months without thinking about this. I can go for days before I remember to text my daughter to say - hey are you ok? while other mothers are calling every day, several times a day.

But as the state of unity is not steady (even if it were steady and the question did not arise because it is meaningless, my concern will remain valid, just not formulated by me), when I am in separation, I suddenly feel concerned and ask myself - have I been unavailable to my daughter? From my daughter's perspective - have I been unavailable? There is a sense of being "absent" all the time (and paradoxically present). Even asking myself the question "have I been unavailable to my daughter?" will fade before I get round to calling her. Remember our close ones may not undergoing this journey to unity; they have personalized needs. They want to be heard and understood. We all want to be heard and understood.

I did ask her yesterday. Her answer was "I am comforted in the knowledge that you love me", I don't need more. I still have to ask others.



Sey

Edited by - SeySorciere on Sep 08 2021 07:25:05 AM
Go to Top of Page
  Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Printer Friendly
Jump To:
AYP Public Forum © Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) Go To Top Of Page
This page was generated in 0.03 seconds. Snitz Forums 2000