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Lesson 105 - Q&A Hitting a wall at
Date: Tue Feb 3, 2004 11:28pm
New Visitors: It is recommended you read from the beginning of the archive, as previous
lessons are prerequisite to this one. The first lesson is, "Why
Q: I started the practices at the beginning and was doing well till I hit #55,
"Mulabandha." I find it near impossible to "gently" flex the sphincter
muscle. When I try, I become completely tense and experience a variety of
aches and pains as a result. I keep trying, but can't wait to get out of
pranayama-which up to this point I had been quite comfortable. I'm also
concerned with the sexual emphasis the lessons have taken. I'm looking for
spiritual enlightenment and now I wonder if I'm doing the wrong practice.
A: If mulabandha is not good at this stage, it is a good time to back off to
a comfortable level of practice and bide your time there for a while. It
could be months or even much longer before you feel ready to go to the next
step. That is okay. What you are doing is very advanced already. You will be
purifying and opening at a good clip. It is your journey.
This approach to practices is unorthodox in that everyone can go at their
own pace, so you must be measured in your approach and gauge your practices
to your experience. Many of the practices described in the lessons have
historically been reserved for the very few (esoteric), until now. So we all
have a big responsibility in using this new approach. It is hoped that many
more will be able to benefit from advanced yoga practices than in the past
It is not possible for anyone to zoom right through everything in a few
months without hitting a wall at some point. It is a long journey we are on.
Remember the lesson, "What
is your time line?"
The lessons are being put in place for the long haul, to provide an ongoing
resource for aspirants at every level. The practices will become
progressively more advanced as you read on, and some will seem outrageous.
Naturally, at higher levels fewer will be ready, but there are folks at
every level here now, so we go on. Over time, everyone will go as far as
they are able and willing. The goal is to blaze the trail clearly from
beginning to end for everyone's use.
As for the sexual aspect, it can't be separated. It is part and parcel of
the middle of the journey. I have not been able to figure out a way to keep
it out. So we are facing it head on. You will see how it fits in as you read
on. Eventually sex is transcended to something much more. To ignore it is to
hit the worst wall of all -- pretending something is not there. Sex is
there, and the energy will expand up at some point. If it does not, it only
means there are obstructions to be cleared out. It is a fundamental reality
in the transformation of the nervous system to higher functioning. If you
are not ready to deal with it directly in practices, that is okay. Just bide
your time. Meditation and spinal breathing will work to open and enliven the
entire nervous system in more subtle ways, and you can avoid the direct
stimulation of sexual energy if that is best for you. So leave mulabandha
for now, and stay away from siddhasana too. Even sambhavi (at the third eye)
is sexual when it connects, bringing ecstatic conductivity up the spinal
nerve from the pelvic region. That is just how we are wired for
enlightenment, you know. But you can do it all with meditation and spinal
breathing. It just takes a little longer, and the sexual aspects are more
behind the scenes. The experiences will ultimately be the same, and you will
be ready for them. The nervous system will open naturally to its own truth,
and you will be filled with light and bliss.
There is no particular place you are supposed to be on this broad spectrum
of practices. Everyone is on the leading edge of their own journey to
enlightenment. Wherever it works for you is where you are supposed to be. As
purification occurs, you can move on at your own pace. Be careful to not
overextend and expose yourself to ongoing difficulties. This is supposed to
be fun. Choose your level of practices for a smooth, enjoyable ride.
The guru is in you.
For detailed discussion on
building a stable practice routine with self-pacing, see the
AYP Eight Limbs of Yoga book,
and AYP Plus.
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